12 June 2013

1 Busy Guy

Yesterday I got the idea that if the present company that insures our home won’t write a policy in the name of the trust, that it is time to reach out to someone that will.  Chances are pretty good that the house will be in the name of the trust for a while.  So I reached out to the company that wrote my Renters Policy.  My Agent there seems to think that he can write a policy that will help me out.  I told him that I wanted to give our present insurer a chance, because our agent is on vacation this week.  I sent along copies of all of the legal docs that he would need.  Now I am playing the waiting game.

I did the math on Bankruptcy payments my guy has made and there is a considerable difference between what he actually paid in and what he is getting credit for.  Apparently the Trustee disburses funds in an odd manner, which doesn’t seem right and/or fair to me.  I got a website to take a look at that will show me some details.  I have to register for access, which I will do tonight.  I am also waiting to hear from the other firm I wrote.  Plus I am told there are Bankruptcy Message Boards on-line that should be able to help me as well.  I really want to walk away from this.  It’s a struggle to make the house payment and this is an added expense that I just don’t feel I should be burdened with.  However, it it turns out the advice I have been given is correct then it’s an insurance policy and I will probably keep on paying the bastards.

So as you probably gathered it’s lunch time here.  I wolfed down my food.  I was thinking about the lunch time conversations that I used to have.  I looked forward to checking in at lunch time to see what was new and to discuss what was the plan for supper.  Now I have no one to talk to at lunch time and I have to figure out what is for supper, which is subject to change until I actually get home.

Last nights meal was Stouffers Meat Loaf  & Mashed Potatoes.  I threw in a side of Broccoli and there you have it.  A meal small enough to be called a snack.  I was so hungry but I just told myself that was it for the night.  The cats on the other hand wolfed down their food and then asked for 2nds.  I of course gave in. 

I want to eat out but getting home late and then having things to do plus the children being mad at me, well I would just as soon go home.  I mean I will wind up there sooner or later.  I have discovered that having good music playing helps make the place feel a little bit more occupied.

Against my better judgment I paid $14.99 to own a Lewis Black standup routine via Amazon.  I can’t stay awake long enough to watch it from start to end.  I got the tail end last night and he was on a roll.  I started playing it over got a couple laughs and then I am waking up to go to bed and turn it off.  When I sit down at night and go to watch TV it’s not long before I can be out of it. 

Very much looking forward to the weekend.  I have preliminary plans to make it to Sam’s Club again, buy a pair of shoes and eat out a couple times.  I am still kicking the idea about pie around.  I thought about going to a place we frequented for Chicken and Pie, which is much closer to home.  They only take cash and I’ve got some of that.  That might be my Friday night dinner, not sure yet.  I know I want to make it to IHOP because they have Jelly Donut Pancakes which sound yummy.  I love bakery and no doubt I will love these pancakes.

The one thing that for sure will happen is I am going to take a nap.  I look forward to laying on the couch.  To have one cat between my legs and another sitting on my chest. As we all just drift off to sleep.  Picturing that right now makes me want to head home and sack out. 

Thus far this is the first week when I haven’t reached out to a friend when I got home.  I have been calling him often.  I’d like to wait it out and see how long it takes him to call me.  However, I am sure that I will have some type of news either good or bad and will be compelled to reach out to tell him.

I don’t know why but I feel compelled to write this.  You can’t be with someone for 20 + years loose them either to death or a breakup and instantly get over it and move on.  I know I am young but this man was my life and all that I had known for well over 1/2 of my life.  Moving past this will take a whole lot of time.  I have my moments but for the most part I am coping with it better than I expected.  You say you can’t live without someone, when the truth is you just don’t want to live without them.  I am doing all sorts of things that I never in a million years thought would be possible to function once he passed away.

I’ve got my paperwork filled out for my two days off.  I will be asking for them later today.  I don’t expect any problems as I haven’t been off since I was out on bereavement back in April.  My anniversary was in May at which time my PTO bank started over.  I lost 8 days but they were so kind to give me time I feel like it’s a wash. 

Yeah the clock is still ticking.  Lunch time is about done and it’s back to machine heaven.  I forgot all about icing my hand last night.  It’s getting better and looks more like a sore now than a bite.  I have a feeling in a couple days all will be back to normal.  What is driving me nuts is what looks like a small pimple on the outside of my wrist.  It itches like mad.  I am not sure if it came from a cat claw or if it’s connected to whatever bit me.  This morning I decided to pop it and it’s calmed down some.  However just mentioning this makes everything itch again.  Funny how your mind thinks of things when it’s idle but when your occupied you concentrate on what is in front of you and forget about so many other little things. 

Two more days left in this work week.  I hope they fly by as fast or faster than my lunch time does.  Well time to hit post and get back to it.  You peeps take care and I will talk with you later.

1 comment:

Jude said...

No a person can't just "get over" a loss quickly, especially after 20+ years. It takes time to heal, and everyone's process and timing is different and very individual.

I'm glad to hear your hand is getting better!

Did you get your days off? Hope so!