Lonely

I’ve been thinking about the college guy yesterday and how I wished that I would have made a move. That’s even though I believe he’s straight. Hell, I might have at least been able to make a friend if nothing else. Every time I look out at the column that he painted I think of him. It’s like a reminder and it’s painful. He did a great job and I’m proud that the project is behind me, it’s going to be a while before I can look at the column and not think of him. I had a thought of trying to reach out to him via social media, but I know that is less likely to have the favorable outcome that I want. I’m not a weird person, just lonely sprinkled with a hint of desperation. While I’m not a fan of his boss I kind of want to call him and plan another job just to get the guy back here so I can ask him out. That’s not going to happen, but the thought crossed my mind.

I made it out for breakfast and I was very hungry. I had a delicious breakfast and then headed off to the grocery store. Then off to the gas pump. The prices per gallon are insane but since I usually don’t go below a ½ tank and that’s right where I was, my bill wasn’t horribly high but still I know that it could have been cheaper.

Came home and unloaded the groceries. I curled up with the cats. I got sleepy but I had problems falling asleep. While it was a pain, I think it will work to my advantage tonight or so I hope, because I need a good night’s sleep.

Had a horrible nightmare last night, it involved my favorite cashier at the grocery store. She’s an older lady and I don’t see her like I used to because she doesn’t work Sunday mornings. I was shaken when I woke up at 6a but was thankful that it was only a dream. I got up to use the restroom, and Rudy joined me when I returned to bed. He was hopeful that I would steer towards the direction of the kitchen instead of the bedroom. We had a nice cuddle session, and I tried to go back to sleep but that was pointless. The light in the living room turned on at 6:30a & that was my cue to get moving. I took my sweet time but made it out of bed and Rudy got his breakfast.

The loneliness pain is the absolute worst. I think that because of the fact I am gay, my age doesn’t help. I want the pain to stop and this problem solved. The negative way comes to mind of just dropping out of life in general. That would solve the problem but then I’d never get to know what the future had in store for me. Conversely the pain would stop. However, the only thing I am sticking around for is the cats. If it wasn’t for them, I think I would have checked out a long time ago. It’s been going on for long enough and yeah, I know that it’s all up to me, not like some hot guy is just going to magically come walking up to my doorstep but sure would be nice if that happened. I kind of feel like I get to see all these hot guys and some I ask out and get turned down; others play games. I’m not up for rejection but I know it comes with the territory and it’s something you must get used to, suck it up and move on there will always be another hot guy. However, the rejection can harden you and eventually you get to the point where you don’t want to take a chance because it’s probably going to wind up being the same no, sorry I’m straight. Humor but what ever happened to trying something new? My end game is sexually motivated but I’m NOT looking to jump in bed, I want to get to know a guy and make sure that were a match and we both want the same thing, then we can go hop in bed. I think that if I do ever actually get to have sex with another guy that I might have feelings of guilt, but I know my spouse is dead and gone, he would want me to move on. Just as if the shoe had landed on the other foot, I would want the same for him.

Still, I decided it was time to look at dating apps again. I got on something new with the intent on subscribing for a month, but they wanted $50. I didn’t really like what I saw and deleted my account. I downloaded another app to look around and try. I had no idea it wasn’t open to everyone that wanted to subscribe. I built my profile and am waiting to get approved. There are no options at this stage to delete my account, which is kind of what I want to do since it’s not open. I don’t have a comfort feeling about it.

I went out for Mexican food at my favorite place. The flavor I was looking for was there. It was nice to be out of the house. I really didn’t want to come home but I’ve had laundry to finish up, and the cats needed their supper so here I am.

Life – it’s full of emotions and experiences. Wish I would have enjoyed and appreciated my youth while I had it. I have lots of memories to reflect on, some good and some bad. I’m proud of the accomplishments that I have made over the last 13 years, and I know my late spouse would be proud of me as well. Never thought I’d make it to this point but here I am. Only thing left is to find a guy to share the rest of my life with. Would be nice to win the lottery and quit my job. If that doesn’t happen then some how either find a new job or find a way to be content where I am. If all these pieces fell into place, I tell myself the same lie repeatedly, I’d be happy. Truth is I’d be happier, but I don’t know for certain that I would truly be happy. I’ve had plenty of time to experience being sad, lonely and depressed. I’d like a chance to flip those emotions and experience years of happiness and positive things. I kind of think I have paid my dues but then again, I am biased.

Hoping for a great week ahead for all of us. Sincerely, thank you for stopping by it makes my day that you are here. Take care!

ON VACATION

Hi there!

As you can tell by the title, I am on vacation. Only on my second workday off and I am bored. This past Sunday I got together with my Thanksgiving friends we went to a Mexican place I had been to before but didn’t care much for. I had to fight a little bit, but I picked up the bill. I know they can’t afford stuff like that, and it would just go on a credit card that would get minimum monthly payments. No sense in financing a meal.

I skipped the grocery store on Sunday, and it’s been interesting getting by on what is here, but I am making it. Thus far I have just had breakfast at home and went out for my late afternoon meal.

Monday it was White Castle. I have been having a serious craving for the place and while it was enjoyable the original taste I remember just didn’t seem to quite be there. I sat eating my meal looking around the restaurant and remembering the many times me and my late spouse went there. It just made me miss him that much more. It didn’t help that I burped onion ring batter for the rest of the evening, they sure were good though.

Remember that lower paying job I mentioned a short time ago. Well, I applied for it on Monday night. I don’t know if I could make it on the salary they are paying. I’d like to know more about the job and to see if I even get selected for an interview. I think I’d like it a lot and a change of pace I think would be nice. I’ve looked to see what other jobs are out there but nothing else tickled my fancy thus far. I’ll probably wind up staying where I am because I like the money. I just figured out that I’ve still got 2 weeks of vacation to take before the end of the year. It hasn’t accrued yet but once it has, I plan on taking more time off which is something to look forward to. If I want to burn through my reserve carry over, then I would have a total of 4 weeks to take. Just thinking of taking an entire month off from work sounds wonderful, but I think of the mess after a week. I can only imagine what kind of cluster fuck I would come back to. I’ve not checked email and am letting it pile up.

I had a profitable day Monday. I got my money back from the post office for the letter I sent that cost me $20 to send, that was nice. Then I called my Auto Insurance company, and they applied some discounts that I saw were missing and I got an extra discount because I paid in full. That money will come back to me in a few days via a check. I’m looking forward to getting it.

Tonight I went to a pizza place in town. Nothing special and service was just okay. When my bill came back with my card, there was no pen to sign the receipt with. I had to stop someone and ask for a pen. I also didn’t get a pizza box to carry out my left-over pizza in; it was just a Styrofoam container. I was not happy about that.

Went to the dentist today for my 6-month checkup, got good news as usual and was pleased. I don’t go back until April 1^st and that’s no joke.

Rewatched the entire Boots series on Netflix. Shame there won’t be a 2^nd season of that show, at least not on Netflix. I know that I’m not the only person who wants the story line to continue and to see how things play out for the cast. Fingers crossed that they make a 2^nd season.

Trying to have lunch with my other friend but he said he would text me back yesterday and I haven’t heard from him. I think he forgot all about me and really seemed like he wasn’t interested in getting together.

I have made some progress on getting the stupid post on my front porch replaced. The guy I told was hired hasn’t told me the total yet, I’ve only got a ballpark estimate. I’ve got another guy that is cheaper, but he seems like he doesn’t know what he is doing so while he costs less, I think you get what you pay for. I’d just like to get this job done so I can move on.

It doesn’t help that there is construction on the main street in and out of the subdivision. Things are quite a mess and not coming home my usual way takes some adjusting to but I’m making it thus far.

It’s super-hot out and kind of miserable to be out doing anything. I really want to drive but even with AC it’s kind of a bit much. I will have to bite the bullet though if I want to go for a drive.

I put off going to Sam’s club which is just around the corner because I didn’t want to deal with the construction. I had planned to do it when I came home from the dentist, but they ran behind and I sat for far too long. I was only interested in coming home and relaxing. Yeah, I’m kind of lazy but it’s my time to do with as I please. I’d rather be out of the area and on a true vacation, that’s on my someday list. I need a traveling companion to make it fun and worthwhile.

Tomorrow is my birthday and I’ve got nothing going on. I’m telling myself that I need to make it to Sam’s and try to fit in Lowes just to get them out of the way. Then take a 2-hour drive to go eat some fish and see some different surroundings. Time will tell how that plays out.

Right now, my plan is to get to bed so that I am prepared for my early Rudy morning wake up call. Get a shower and head out for breakfast. Then hit up a bakery and surprise my thanksgiving friends with some fresh pastry. That’s been on my list of things to do for a while. I know I won’t want to wake up early and I might wind up eating breakfast at home but I for sure want to hit up that bakery. Doing it early in the morning has two benefits. #1 it’s cooler out early in the morning. #2 better selection the quicker you get there.

Thursday morning, I have my facial booked and that’s pretty much it. I’ve got nothing planned Friday through Monday. I’d like to clean up my deck; it would be nice to admire but doing the actual work yeah not looking forward to that.

In case it doesn’t come glaring through, I’ve got some depression going on and I want to check out of the world but that would leave the cats devastated and I won’t do that to them, were good for each other. Getting older is only part of the depression piece. Missing my late spouse as well as being alone for so long, not having success in the dating world and my boring life – it just feels like I am wasting away. Doesn’t seem like I matter to anyone but my job. Kind of wish I would have gotten the dumpster and cleaned this place up, at least I’d be busy and not have time to dwell on poor old me.

Well, off to climb the steps and settle in for the evening. Hopefully I can get a great night’s sleep and be raring to go with the same energy that Rudy has every morning when he wakes me up. Thanks for stopping by. I do hope all is well with you!

DELIVERED

The letter has been delivered.  I got an email that shows that it was signed for by an individual, which makes me think that I didn’t get the Restricted Delivery feature that I paid so much for.  I won’t know until I get the physical return receipt in the mail, which should arrive tomorrow but probably won’t arrive until next week. 

The fact that the letter was delivered today caught me off guard.  I am just eager to see if I got what I paid for, if not I plan to ask for a refund.  USPS guarantees their service  so if they fall short and you can prove it, then your entitled to a refund, you just have to ask. 

Thus far it’s total radio silence here.  Based on the fact it’s been a few hours, I am not expecting a reply but that’s not to say one isn’t going to come.  I’m sure my letter brought all kinds of emotion with it.  I believe I’ve accomplished what I set out to do.  If there is a next move it’s not on me to make it.

I do have some second thoughts if I did the right thing but my gut told me this is what I needed to do.  I believe my late spouse would be proud of my effort so that he didn’t die in vain and his grandson now knows who his actual grandfather was. 

If there are any further developments I will keep you posted. Time to go relax and unwind.   

 

 

An okay day

Howdy, hope all is well.

I woke up early fed the cats.  Hung out for a bit to make sure that Mora would eat and that she didn’t get cheated out of food.  I sat at the kitchen table and waited for hog jaws (aka Rudy) to finish.  Then I called her like I do every morning and she was already on the move toward the kitchen.  After she ate, I went back to my bedroom.  I climbed in bed and watched TV for a little bit.  The cats joined me.  I decided that I should get up and at least eat breakfast.  Had a bowl of cereal to polish off the box and a banana. 

Got my morning meds and then headed back to my room to watch TV.  Eventually wound up at porn and watched a few scenes.  After cleaning up the mess, I went back to watching normal TV.  Got tired about 30 minutes after that and climbed back into bed with the cats.  I had to physically move Rudy and he was pissed about it.  I know he’s like me once he gets comfy leave me alone.  However, he was taking up significant room and without moving him there would have been no room for me.  He laid up against me and tried to push me out of bed.  It was funny but it didn’t work.  Took about an hour nap and then was wide awake. 

Watched more TV when I woke up but kept looking at the clock and realized that it would be to my benefit if I got moving.  Hit up the shower and got dressed.  Headed out to get the mail and then came back home for a short bit.  About the time I was comfy it was time to leave.  I was a little bit earlier than what Waze told me to leave, but ran in to a little bit of traffic as well as some light rain.  Arrived at the doctors office with 10 minutes to spare. 

On the way over I saw a billboard for Arby’s and it was close to an exit where there is an Arby’s.  It transported me back to a memory that I had with my late spouse.  It felt like it was all playing out in real time as I continued to drive.  It’s been 13 years and out of the blue something can trigger me.  It happened a lot more often in the early years.  I kind of figured that it was done but apparently not. 

This visit seemed rushed at least to me.  He was on time, I only had to wait a couple minutes before I was taken to an exam room.  Then after my vitals were taken, it was just a couple minutes and the doc was in.  We chatted and he moved to get his exam done.  I complained about being stuck for blood multiple times.  The doc walked me to the lab and requested the best sticker they had.  The lady who took my blood got it on the first try.  The doc said to come back in 6 months.  I don’t know why we switched this year from every 3 months to every 6 months.  I won’t be back until January.  I know that time will fly by.  I am still waiting on lab results, normally they are in by the time I am home but I got nothing.  I’m guessing they will come in tomorrow, which is fine. 

Went to the place that sucks at making pizza.  Ordered my favorite pasta dish.  I had a smoking hot young waiter.  I wanted to hit on him so bad.  All I know is that I wanted to say if I looked as good as you do, I wouldn’t be single.  I tell the cats all the time that if I had their good looks I wouldn’t be single.  I ate, paid my bill and left.  It would be nice to go back to work with a boyfriend but I’m not holding my breath.

Got the batteries in the garage camera changed.  Put the trash out and I’m home for the day.  Caught up on my porn surfing.  Yeah I peeked at work email earlier today because I was bored.  I didn’t respond to anything but took time to delete a couple of messages that were nothing but noise.  Then switched work email off.  I really want to login now and play catch up but that’s working and well I am off.  I guess I am too devoted to my job and take it way too seriously.  No wonder I get frustrated so easily and want to throw my hands up and walk out. 

Crunched numbers on a new vehicle just for fun.  It would be a bit costly even with a sizeable down payment and trade in.  However, I could make it work if I had to.  Then I realized that my calculations didn’t include GAP insurance, it can’t be that much more.  I will never ever buy a car without it.  Even though I’ve never had to use it.  It’s one of those things that if you need it, your glad that you have it. 

GAP INSURANCE … “Gap insurance covers the difference between what you owe on your car loan or lease and the car’s depreciated value if it’s totaled or stolen. It helps ensure you are not left paying out of pocket for the remaining balance on your loan after an insurance payout.”

Tomorrow’s agenda includes breakfast out, a haircut, trip to Sam’s club for fuel and more brownies if they still have them.  In the afternoon traveling back to the seafood place to get a strawberry Pina Colada [really hope it’s good and worth my money] and some fish.  Might hit up the pet food store if I don’t then that will be a Saturday task.  Looking forward to the drive and hope that the rain stays away.

That’s all I know at the moment.  Mora is telling me it’s time to head up, as if it’s a work night.  If it was I wouldn’t be down here.

I heard something in watching YouTube videos.  I think George Carlin said it.  You know people have a lot of good things to say about you, problem is you won’t ever hear them until your dead.  There is a lot of truth in that statement.  He was smart and funny. 

Well I guess I should run.  Thanks for stopping by!

More fresh hell

What an exhausting and costly day this has been. 

This morning after I came home from the grocery store and we had our nap, I came downstairs to surf on the computer.  Mora jumped on my lap and she has this bad habit of rubbing her butt on my arm.  She doesn’t always do it but it happens more frequently than not.  It happened today and she didn’t leave anything but it smelled really bad.  I took a look and she has an Anal Gland Abscess. 

I made a vet appointment for her thinking that it was this Tuesday, that was the soonest they could get me in.  As we got into the afternoon it looked like things were getting worse.  Something told me to call and check to see if there were any cancellations.  Turns out her appointment was booked for next Tuesday and not this Tuesday.  I got her moved up to this evening at 6p. 

As you might imagine the poor thing is in a lot of pain.  I haven’t seen her actually go to the bathroom but she has tried.  That made me glad that I was taking her over.  It’s a few minutes after 8p and we just got home about 15 minutes ago. 

I hate professional people.  We waited 30 minutes to get to a room and then another 15 minutes before a doctor came in.  Since she (Mora) wouldn’t let me touch her rear end I knew that she wouldn’t be super pleased about the vet poking and prodding.  However, the vet was able to take a look and determine that the abscess has ruptured and is draining.  They took at x-ray at my request to make sure that she didn’t have any stones or wasn’t constipated/impacted.  She has some stool that is in the process of working it’s way out the exit so she should be going to the bathroom eventually. 

She got a shot of a NSAID to help with the inflammation.  They sent her home with a narcotic for pain and I’ve got her first dose on board.  I’ve got more of the NSAID in pill form to give her in the morning.  Then I have to make sure that she eats breakfast and I can give her an Antibiotic.  She’s got 2 weeks worth of the antibiotic.  They want to re-check her in 2 weeks.  However, if she hasn’t made progress in a couple days we will be going back.  Otherwise as long as things progress and she heals I honestly see no reason to go back. 

I booked an appointment for Rudy on Saturday but I am going to be calling and cancelling it, he’s fine and there is no reason to take him over just yet.  I think it would be wasted money. 

Now on to the alarm.  I had this feeling that I should check the appointment to make sure that were on for Tuesday.  I logged in and found that the appointment was scheduled for Monday by the tech.  I told him specifically Tuesday, I said it twice and he confirmed it to me.  However, when he plugged it into his computer he did it for Monday.  I won’t be available because I’m taking the car in and I have no idea how long that visit will take.  I suspect just a couple hours but it could go longer. 

Anyway, I called and was told that they didn’t have any availability on Tuesday and that I would have to wait until Thursday.  The dummy I talked to cancelled the Monday appointment and then tried to book for Tuesday but the system wouldn’t let him.  He transferred me to “scheduling” and they told me that the first open date they had was Thursday.  I asked what I had to do to cancel service.  They said to call back tomorrow as the cancellation department was closed on the weekend.  Needless to say I am quite pissed off. 

I calmed down a little bit, called back and got someone to work with me.  We booked the Thursday appointment just to have something on the book so I don’t get totally blocked this week.  I have to call back in the morning and talk with another department as they should be able to get this fixed.  I also called the tech and left him a voice mail message, asking him to call me back to confirm that we are on for Tuesday.  This is going to be done my way, since it’s my money.  If they can’t accommodate me then I will sever the relationship.  I’ve been a customer for 28 years.  I paid for the install in full which back then was $700.  Then add on to that all of the money I’ve spent over the last 28 years for monitoring.  They have made a bundle off of me.  I really don’t want to lose the low rate I have for monitoring and if I cancel I know that will go away. 

However, I thought about it and while I miss the alarm system and the peace of mind it provides, like I told the tech we have never had any issues or needed to use it.  There have been a couple cooking related “fires” back when my late spouse was the cook.  We have had multiple false alarms because one of us forgot the system was on but I’ve not needed it.  That made me realize I can just walk away from this and save my money if I so choose.  I am not under any contract, nor do I want to be. 

We shall see what tomorrow brings, hopefully not more headaches and tons of money siphoned from my bank account.  However, vacation is always expensive even if you don’t go anywhere.  I can’t wait to get on the road to travel to a restaurant and clear my mind.  If all goes well that will happen tomorrow for supper.   

I’ve done a light cleaning of the house and got the trash out.  Need to still do laundry but there is no hurry it’s not like it’s going to get up and run away.  I am going to head up, hope that we can get a good nights sleep and get up early tomorrow, shower and put on some fresh clothes.  Have breakfast at home and then take the vehicle in for the service appointment.  While I am there I will call the alarm company and see what we can work out or if I am going to wind up walking away. 

I’m not sure why the black cloud that is over me is dealing me so much chaos but it’s like I have had a bit of a break for too long and it’s making up for lost time or so it seems.  I know it can always be worse. 

Talked with my Thanksgiving friends, they like the idea of going out on the 4th, so I am waiting to hear where they would like to go and a time.  I’m not going to push if they call great and if they don’t well then I will go somewhere by myself. 

I do hope that your day was way better than mine.  Damn I hope that things get better soon.  Take care and I will talk with you again soon. 

Productive Saturday

Happy Saturday!

Unfortunately, I had another insomnia attack after I got to sleep.  Was up for a couple hours watching TV before I was able to go back to bed and sleep.  Mora being the cuddle bug she is snuggled up to me and helped lull me back to sleep.  Just as I was about to drift off she decided to leave and that woke me up but after that I was back sleeping. 

Woke up early because that’s how my body is wired and also I’ve got Rudy who wants his breakfast.  Everyone got something to eat.  I showered the night before so I just threw on some clothes and headed out. 

Got my haircut.  Went to my friends shop.  The main guy I have a stronger friendship with is on vacation.  I chatted it up in the office for a bit and then headed out.  No sense in wasting a perfectly good day. 

Came home, had to use the bathroom.  Typed up what I wanted done to my vehicle for service which I took directly from the Manufacturers Maintenance schedule.  I left off changing the cabin air filter because that was just done a while back.  Oddly enough that is super labor intensive.  You put in a $6 filter but spend $100 on labor.  Then it was time to head out again. 

Hit up the UPS store, dropped off my defective blower.  The replacement arrived yesterday.  Next up Post Office then on to the shop where I got my tires at.  They do auto repair work and I trust them a bit more than my friends mechanic who missed the fact that I had a broken tie rod last time.  Anyway, I turned in the laundry list picked the Monday of my vacation and I’m on the list for first thing.  I plan to live there that day.  It’s going to be hours and it’s going to suck, not in the good pleasurable way either.  I told them I have new car fever and as long as they can tell me my vehicle is sound and doesn’t need any major repairs I will likely keep it to stay away from car payments.  At least that is the plan as of now.  Who knows if that will change down the road.  Part of me just wants to go hit up a car dealer and just buy a new one to be done with it.  I’ve also scheduled a Facial for the end of the week.  It’s at a new place.  I’m excited and figured saving it for the end of the week would be smart in case there were any complications with the car or I wanted to get a new one.  Leaving the rest of that week open for now.

Anyway, back on the road and stopped at Sam’s Club.  Got me a new membership card.  That should solve my problem at the pump as well as when I go to the store.  Kind of happy to get this done. 

Back home to cool off, relax and nap.  Then several hours later, I headed out for a bite to eat.  Decided I’d go back to the place where I had my birthday dinner last year.  It’s been a while since I have been there.  Normally I order from the specials but this time I decided to try the BBQ Peppered Pork Tenderloin.  It was good but way on the salty side.  I got a decent amount of it down for the money I spent.  Kind of sad that I didn’t fully enjoy the meal.  Had a dinner companion.  I sat with a stuffed bear.  Needless to say he didn’t say a word.  It would be funny if there was a hidden camera in that, they would get some great footage. 

On the way back home I talked myself into hitting up the Frozen Custard shop.  Me and my late spouse used to go there all the time but, it lost it’s appeal with me.  It’s still delicious as ever and people flock to that place.  They added a drive thru and people line up and sit and wait in their hot cars.  Not me, I parked and walked up to the window.  Got some Peaches and Custard in a small dish.  It took me back years and was fun.  I ate it outdoors as it was melting as soon as they handed it to me.  It’s quite humid out here. 

Then came home.  I still need to get cat food but figured I would put it off until tomorrow.  My bladder was about to explode from all of the soda and water I drank. 

Passed out supper for the cats and I’m doing laundry.  Playing on the computer.  I’m quite pleased with my progress today. 

Last night I saw the movie Wasteman with Tom Blythe.  Several good chest shots of him as well as ass shots.  There is full frontal nudity but it’s brief.  He’s all tatted up in this movie but not in real life.  The movie held my interest and I was quite surprised by the ending.  I’ve got a mad crush on him. The movie was on Prime, it’s $5 to watch.  I got to see it for free by using Amazon points. 

Well off to scour the web.  Hope you had a great Saturday as well!

Still numb

Morning and Happy Friday!

I am still numb from what I found yesterday.  My mind has been racing thinking of times we interacted in the past.  Memories.  The fact I have photos that I’m sure his kid would probably enjoy seeing the more it makes me want to reach out.  With age comes wisdom and I know to take my time with this and not react and rush into anything.  Right now I am thinking I am going to reach out but just not sure on when.  I know Father’s Day is only a few weeks away and I for sure wouldn’t want to clash with that because it’s going to be a difficult day for the kid. 

Needless to say I didn’t sleep the best last night but I am okay with it.  I also wasn’t in the mood to watch porn last night although perhaps if I would have I might have slept better.  I know it would have made me feel better, if only for a fleeting second.  Nothing quite like an orgasm, shame they don’t last longer!

The cats comforted me once they realized something was wrong after I found out.  Rudy came up and gave me a kiss, just like he did when he was in the shelter.  He’s such a sweet boy.  Mora sat with me letting her motor run on high.  It’s said that the vibrations from a cats purr can heal the human body.  I don’t know if I fully buy that but I can tell you it sure is comforting.  I can listen to a cat purr forever it’s so soothing. 

Work was calm in the morning but picked up in the afternoon.  I only have 1 meeting on the books today, I think it’s going to be a decent day. 

Looking forward to the weekend as per usual.  It’s cat food shopping weekend and also time to clean the cats water fountain and change the filter.  More tasks that I don’t enjoy.  However, I will be getting up early tomorrow as I have a haircut scheduled which I look forward to.  Not waking up early on a Saturday but I figure it will either get me motivated or cause me to come home and take a nap.  Thinking about where I want to eat this weekend.  Chinese, Mexican and BBQ all sound good to me.  I could honestly probably fit them all in if I really wanted to but I’d be so damn full.  Despite being overweight I really only eat 2 meals on weekends and sometimes throughout the week.  Breakfast and Supper.  Lunch is optional and dependent on how I feel as well as what I have on hand to munch on. 

Hope that you have a good day and a super weekend.  Thanks for stopping by.  Talk with you all again soon.

Real Estate

Morning!

I periodically open Zillow on my phone to check on Real Estate in the area.  Depends on my mood at the time I am using the app if I want to look at houses for sale or places for rent.  Last night I opened it to see if my neighbors place was listed or pending being listed.  I didn’t find it.  However, I found another house in the subdivision that is pending listing and it’s going for $345,000 USD.  That’s about average pricing for this neighborhood.  It’s tract housing meaning that there are only a few floor plans available and the houses are basically all created the same.  This particular one looks like my other neighbors house as it has a walk out basement. 

We moved in here well over 25 to 30 years ago and only paid $130,000 USD for this place.  I can’t believe that it’s appreciated that much in value but based on the market it says otherwise.  I know what’s wrong with this place and know that if I was to sell as is I think I would be lucky to walk away with $200,000 USD.  That’s still a decent amount of money but then the next challenge would be where to go and how to get there. 

While I have wanted to move for years, I don’t see that in the cards.  It’s cheaper and a little bit less stress to stay put or so I think for now.  I know the longer I wait the more difficult it will become to leave. 

Changes aren’t always a good thing and can often just be a temporary sense of gratification.  I’d hate to think about starting all over on a mortgage considering I am closer now to paying this place off.  Actually, if my late spouse wouldn’t have refinanced and added in credit card debt I would likely be even closer than I am not at having this place paid off.  Not sure if I will actually live long enough to pay this place off only time will tell.  I’m sure as time goes on values for homes in my neighborhood as well as else where will continue to climb. 

Switching gears – Had to work late last night, something last minute came up.  That prevented me from not only enjoying my evening but from brushing the cats.  I had to change a bowl of dry food for them yesterday because someone got sick.  I think if it was just Rudy he would manage on his own to not have fur balls but since they bathe each other big Mora is the fur monster.  There is plenty of her and plenty of fur.  I am always amazed at the amount of fur I get from brushing her as compared to her tiny brother. 

Tonight I will be finishing off the pizza.  I want to go out tomorrow night there is a local pizza place that has all you can eat Spaghetti that comes with salad and a drink for $12 which sounds really good.  BBQ also appeals to me.  Who knows I might just wind up staying home and eating out of the freezer but it’s nice to know I have options!  Something about eating out during the week and changing things up is appealing not to mention it gets me out of the house, if only for a short time. 

3 meetings on the agenda for today – 2 of which are with vendors.  Hopefully, all goes smoothly. 

The sun is out again today and it’s supposed to be a nice hot summer like day.  Wish I wasn’t trapped in the house and could get out and go for a drive.  In a few weeks that will be the case but with my luck it will probably rain that whole week, but I hope not. 

Have a great day and take good care of yourself because there is only one you. 

U.S. Tax Day

Morning!

Today is the deadline for filing your Income Taxes if you live in the U.S.  Most people dislike this day just because it is a costly day and time to part with some money.  I file early and so this day is meaningless for me just another day.  The earlier you file the less your chances of identity theft.  Trust me when I tell you that if a scammer files a tax return in your name it’s a slight nightmare and it takes a very long time to get things sorted and if your due a refund that will be longer you have to wait for your money.  Speaking of waiting for money I am waiting for a state refund only because I was told I had to mail my return in due to “special circumstances”.  Nothing changed, I do the same thing each year.  The only thing that changes is my income when I get a pay raise or bonus – otherwise it’s all the same.  Not like I make six figures unless you count all of those leading zeros.

I got things under control and caught up at work, now it’s hum drum boring but I am fine with that.  I’m ready to call it a week.  Woke up with a sore throat which I am sure was from the AC running over night and blowing on me.  My sinuses are running a bit but hopefully things remain under control.  I am a bit drowsy but it’s still early.  Who knows what today will bring other than two more dumb meetings. 

Busy season will be around the corner we will have summer interns starting and a new guy on our team so this is for sure the calm before the storm.  Might as well enjoy it while it lasts and soak it all in, savor it because it will be busy for a while.  I don’t look forward to it but I suppose it will be good to keep my mind sharp or something like that. 

It was a nice summer like day yesterday, the cats enjoyed basking in the sun, sleeping and eventually waking up for supper and treats.  Then as the sun set they drifted off to sleep.  I was able to make it to bed before Rudy woke up and started playing.  He wore himself out before coming to bed.  Then it was like I had a lump sleeping next to me.  Of course I woke up in the middle of the night.  He woke up early and begged me to get up.  I gave in a half hour early.  No sense in tossing and turning trying to go back to sleep when all I will do is wear myself out and get frustrated.  I did make it all day yesterday without a nap.  Right now I’m not so sure that will be the case today. 

Finished off the pizza last night, glad it is gone.  Watched a couple episodes last night of Queer As Folk (the US version).  I’ve seen it several times and own the entire series on DVD in a box set.  Watched every episode as it aired each week with my late spouse.  That was the highlight of our week.  I was younger and it didn’t take much in the way of their man on man sex scenes to get me all worked up.  Those were the good old days. 

Speaking of my late spouse.  Mora was in my lap as I was watching TV and I got Rudy to jump on the couch.  She jumped up as if she was mad but she saw something.  It was a Cardinal peeking in the window.  They say that when a Cardinal visits you it’s a sign that your lost loved one is with you.  I told her there she was chasing away my guy.  She didn’t see it that way.  Daddy it’s a bird, I’m a cat and we love birds.  Yeah I know.  It was nice in the brief moment it lasted. 

I have been hearing lawn mowers running each day at different times.  The mowing services as well as individuals are all out cutting.  I think every lawn around me has been cut at least once but most have been cut multiple times.  My one neighbor fired up his mower last week and cut his grass.  It’s so tall it’s ready for round two but that probably won’t happen for a couple more weeks until it looks like an overgrown field. 

I think that it’s going to be a long and very hot summer, just based on the early Spring that is seeming to skip Spring and thrust us into Summer. 

Well ho hum guess I will surf the internet and keep a watch on things at work.  Eventually I will head upstairs and spend time with the cats.  I’m trying to stay down here in the mornings and spend the afternoon upstairs.  It doesn’t always work out like that. 

Hope all is well in your world and the weather is nice and enjoyable.  Take care.

13 Years

Greetings – Hope that your having a great day!

As it typically happens my weekend insomnia kicked in last night.  I was so tired and couldn’t wait to get to bed.  I stayed awake until 10:30p and called it a night.  Woke up at 2a and couldn’t go back to sleep.  I knew that I wouldn’t want to function in the morning.  I stayed up watching TV until 4a.  Turned the TV off and Mora came in and got comfy laying on my arm.  She knows how to turn on the magic and I melted and passed out but not before I moved my alarm up a 1/2 hour to 7:30a. 

Morning arrived and my body woke me up and Rudy was right there to say good morning, get out of bed and feed me.  I protested but knew that I had to get up and get moving.  We got breakfast going. 

Time for a shower.  My head doesn’t itch as much or as bad as it did a few days ago.  The redness has faded considerably and I am quite happy with that. 

Threw on some clothes and headed out to the grocery store.  I wasn’t the only one shopping but at least I got there early enough that I was able to snag a great parking spot.  Never mind that I parked next to a jackass who didn’t quite know how to park.  I squeezed myself out carefully and headed inside. 

Grabbed some of those Doom Oreo’s, man they are so good.  It was a breeze in and out trip.  I was done before I knew it.  Then it was time to see how much damage I did.  Close to $100 and I left with 3 bags and a gallon of milk. 

Headed home, put everything away.  The humidity was crazy and I was so uncomfortable.  Took off my clothes and sat in my room with a Sprite Zero watching TV.  Both cats joined me and passed out.  I managed to watch the latest episode of The Pitt without falling asleep so that’s good.  Caught 2 episodes of Neighborhood Watch, which is a show where they play clips of funny security camera recordings. 

Once that was done it was back to Young Sheldon and eventually off to take a nap.  Had to make Rudy move and he wasn’t happy about it.  Woke up and passed out lunch.  I had some junk food as a snack.

The house had cooled down and I knew the basement was going to be chilly so I got dressed and then headed down to do laundry.  It’s going to be a day full of laundry because I put off doing it last weekend. 

I’d like Chinese for supper but the place I go it’s a roll of the dice if they will be open or not.  Instead I’m going out for BBQ.  Not quite as tasty as Chinese but it will be good in it’s own way.  I’m planning on ordering Brisket.  Picking up the mail on the way home and I’m done with running for the day. 

Today is a day I’d rather just skip over.  13 years ago today I lost my spouse. I’ve got no doubt that He’d be quite proud of me.  I still miss him and wish he were here.  I’m selfish I suppose.  Back then I wondered how I would go on and how I would survive.  Each year I am amazed that I lasted another year as the years continue to fly by.  Never thought I’d make it this far.  Also wish the original cats were still with me too, this place was much busier back then now it’s so much quieter than it’s ever been.  At times that is good but sometimes it serves as a reminder that I’m all alone. 

LAZY SUNDAY

Welcome!

Rudy woke me up faithfully on time as usual. He tried for 5a but that’s way too early regardless of the day of the week. I’m sure if there is a day that I give in to a 5a wakeup call he would never forget it. He got me up closer to 7a and I rolled out of bed reluctantly. Today was one of those days where I wished I could have just stayed put.

I got going and headed out into the cold for breakfast. Went back to the usual place and had a dish that my brother turned me onto years ago. Country Fried Steak and Eggs. It was good, but I did miss feeding my sweet tooth. Paid the bill and hit up the grocery store.

I watched a YouTube video on Friday all about frozen food and it turned me on to a couple new brands like Amy’s and Kevin’s. They are higher priced meals for frozen dinners but better ingredients and are supposed to leave you satisfied. I found a few dishes that looked appealing to me and I’m giving them a try, hopefully I enjoy them.

Next stop was the gas station, and I hated this one the most. The card reader always seems to have problems with reading one of my cards and this morning was no exception, but it would have been nice to have it work to get out of the cold wind. Saw a couple of large birds that I hadn’t seen before, they were feeding on some left-behind bread. They looked beautiful.

Made it home to unpack and while I would enjoy a nice Mexican dinner, it’s so cold and windy out that I think I am staying home. I kind of hate that because I won’t leave here all week (unless I manage to change my mind) but I’d rather be with the cats in a warm home than out in the elements.

Finished up with Schitts Creek. Couldn’t help but think of my wedding day watching David & Patrick getting married. What a great show that was. It’s one of those shows that I want more of, but it ended well on a happy note.

I still have some house cleaning chores to take care of. Listening to the scanner to see what mayhem is going on in my area. Just having fun being lazy and doing what I want. I did trim both cats claws last night. Neither of them was pleased about it but Mora put up the biggest fight. You’d think after 3 years they would both trust me more, I mean if I was going to harm them, I would have done it long ago. I get not being a fan of nail trims, I didn’t like them when I was younger, but I have gotten used to them, still not a fan though. Funny thing about a cat, they manage to sharpen their claws up rather quickly after a nail trim. Rudy making his biscuits and poking me with his sharp claws, I am allergic and break out. It looks like I have chicken pox or something without a shirt on. Plus, it itches and it’s no fun. However, I still love Rudy’s biscuits, it’s his begging skill to tell me he wants food.

Here’s hoping that this week is a good one. I’m getting to the house cleaning chores after this and then it will be back to find something to watch on TV. Hope it’s a great Sunday for you.

Reflection

Thinking about yesterday’s repairs I have done a little bit of research. Sounds like I am lucky that I didn’t have an accident or experience catastrophic failure of the steering system. I had a sign but didn’t know it. My car would pull to the left. If it pulls to one side that’s a sign from what I have read. I also learned that tie rods need lubrication. I’m certain by taking my car for service to my friends for service their mechanic didn’t lubricate anything. I’m thinking of switching car maintenance to the tire shop, they do all automotive work just their big seller is tires. Things would be more expensive but I’m thinking I might have more peace of mind, not to mention that I think my automobile would be better cared for.

I am on the fence and can’t decide when I want to get rid of this automobile. It has been good to me, and we have had some good times and some bad times. Lots of memories and I can tell you that there have been exactly five people that I have had as passengers thus far. Next year the car will be 10 years old. I’ve not held on to an automobile like this. Why is it so special you might ask? Well, something drew me to purchase it when I got rid of my lemon car. I knew I was taking a huge risk. I really couldn’t afford it, and I knew that but still bought it anyway. I said I’d make it work and I have, things just fell together and I did have to make some sacrifices. Most of the digits to unlock the door with the keypad (in case you don’t have your fob handy) make up the last 4 digits of my late spouses’ social security number. That was a sign to me, like this was meant to be.

Despite that the majority of what I call convenience tech (like remote start through an app, checking oil life remotely, and GPS tracking) no longer work because it came with a 3G modem, oddly make it more appealing to me. I liked all those features but honestly my life isn’t drastically different without them. It was nice when I drove to work every day to pull up an app on my phone and heat up or cool down the vehicle before I arrived. If I thought, I forgot to lock the door I could send a remote lock (or unlock if I needed to) signal. I like flying under the radar and not having to worry about a potential hacker taking over my car. I’m convinced back in the day when the modem was working that it was hacked. One day, I went out to go to work and couldn’t start it. I tried and tried but nothing. I had a tow truck on the way and had planned to haul it to the dealer but as luck would have it five minutes after I called for the tow truck, I tried to start it, and it worked. I took my chances and made it to work and when it was time to leave it started right up.

It’s really got everything that I have ever wanted or needed in a vehicle except for a heated steering wheel, that’s the only thing I would add.

I know that unlike any other vehicle I have ever had before the day I trade it, I will miss it greatly probably more than any other vehicle that I have owned. I also know that whatever I buy will have big tech in it and I will be tracked and possibly hacked. I’ve said every year since the Pandemic that this is the year I’m getting rid of it. I promised myself last year that this year would be the year. However, my fear is that whatever I buy will be junk and have lots of issues as well as recalls. Eventually I will just take the gamble and go for it. Just as it stands today, I don’t know when that day will come. I also like the fact the engine is well broken in, and I know how to get the best gas mileage out of it. It’s all about making sure the tires are inflated to the proper pressure and then turning on the cruise control when on the freeway, driving the speed limit. That’s the secret. People pass me like I’m standing still but I just think of the savings. I don’t always drive that way, and I do have a led foot. I love speed and this vehicle has a turbo so there is plenty of get up and go. I’ve done 120mph in it, that was back when I thought my mom was still alive and I was trying to make it to the hospital. Only to find out when I walked in the door that my efforts were in vain and she was gone. If I knew that up front, I would have taken my time and driven fast but not at super dangerous speeds. That was piss poor communication on my brothers now wife.

On a different note, I did call it a night early last night. My nose was bothering me, and I wound up taking a Benadryl along with a sleeping pill. I happily found that Schitts Creek is on HBO, which means no commercials. I love that show and I’m sure the only reason it’s there now because of the passing of Catherine O’Hara. She was a great actress. I started watching it and before I knew it after about 5 episodes I was out.

I woke up for a brief period during the early morning but quickly went back to sleep. I had strange dreams, but I felt like I had slept when it was time to get out of bed. I of course didn’t want to get up, and Rudy tried his early morning wake up call early and I told him he was too early. He just took a seat on my chest and laid down. We were both back to sleeping quickly. I think only one of us was happy about that and that I was the happy one. Once it was normal time, I got up and got moving.

I went to an old place where I used to eat breakfast regularly. It was time for a change of pace plus I had something specific I was craving. I got it and enjoyed it very much! Made it through the grocery store, stopped to fill up the gas tank and then back home to warm up and relax. I watched more Schitts Creek and took a nice nap with both cats in my bed. A nice Winter’s Day!

I’ve got a serious case of not wanting to do anything just because I have the strange feeling that this is going to be an overwhelming week and I will be super busy. It’s my chance to enjoy the calm before the storm. I got my chores done. Finishing up on some laundry and as soon as that dryer is done, I plan to change clothes and head for pizza. It is hours before the game, so I know I’m taking a big chance but it’s what I want. Then back home and I am done for the day; I plan to relax and of course watch more of Schitts Creek.

Hoping to have a nice relaxing evening, take a warm shower and fade into what I hope is a blissful and long deep sleep, only to be woken up by my furry alarm clock that is Rudy.

Thanks for stopping by, hope all is well in your world. Take care!

Winter Weekend

Hi and welcome in!

Hope that you’re warm and doing well.

Saturday, I slept in and was lazy for the morning. I watched a movie “I’m Chevy Chase and you’re not”. It was a documentary about Chevy Chase. I enjoyed it. I thought about how good it felt to lie in bed with the cats, not having to be concerned about anything or anyone. It was just us in the moment and it felt so nice.

I got my new modem activated. I thought it was going to be a huge ordeal, but it went simply like it always should have. I disconnected the old one and connected the new one then opened an app on my phone and pressed a button that said activate new equipment and within 10 minutes it was done. I honestly was in shock that it went so well. I did a bit of surfing and testing to see how my speed was. It’s faster but I don’t quite see the 1 gig on my tests, it comes close though. If I run a test on my router or from the cable company those all check out and say I’m getting what I am paying for. I tweaked my network card on my desktop, it supports a gigabit connection but still even after a reboot, I’m close to 1 gig but not quite there. I’m at speeds high enough that I am satisfied.

I have a feeling this 1 gig service is the lowest new speed that they will offer. I accomplished what I wanted in that I got my bill lower but that’s only for 12 months then I must call back and beg again. I am sure that if I ask to go back to 400mpbs they will tell me that it’s no longer offered. What I have now is $105 per month – no way I am ever paying full price that is way too expensive. There are other options but all of those are cellular home internet. There is a new fiber company that is supposed to be coming to town, I hope they arrive within the next 12 months because I’d switch in a heartbeat. I hate cable company.

Anyway, I got a shower and headed out to run errands. First stop was to return the old modem. I walked into the cable company’s store, and you can’t just walk up to the counter anymore, you must sign in on a tablet. Like you’re visiting an AT&T store. Anyway, I did that and waited for a couple minutes. I was able to return the old modem, but the guy tried to pitch me cellular service, and he said that I could get a year free. Tempting as that is, bundling is what they want, because it’s more secure for them and you’re less likely to leave. I want to get away from the cable company in the worst way possible.

Next stop was to get lupper (lunch and supper) it was only 2p and quite early for me to eat but I drove to the Mexican place that I like. It was easy to get in, and I saw some nice eye candy. I had a decent meal, but service was horrible. I waited 15 minutes to get the check so I could pay and leave. My food came out wicked fast as always. I was stunned at the number of people I saw with no coats on. One kid in shorts (that’s the new in thing – shorts year-round).

Next stop was the tire store. Got my quote, $1,300 for 4 tires and 4-wheel alignment. Only $100 more than I expected. I still think it’s highway robbery, but I set it up for next Saturday. After I get my haircut, I will get to sit in the tire store while they do their thing. I expect that I will probably be there for a couple hours because they don’t move that fast.

Next stop was the cat food store. They finally had Duck in stock. I was tempted to buy more than I would normally get but I didn’t. I’m sure that it will backfire on me. I grabbed a larger bag of dry food because both cats really enjoy it. I’m always filling the bowl. It was a happy accident, but it worked out well. I had to park next to a guy with a monster truck who tried to double park. I really had to be careful getting out but my fat ass made it. Thankfully he was gone when I was ready to leave.

Next stop was the Post Office. Then my favorite stop of all, came back home finally. It was nice to be home and so early too. Unloaded everything and took care of feeding the cats. Changed clothes and got comfy.

I worked on laundry and taxes. I was pissed that Turbo Tax wouldn’t let me electronically file one of my state returns. They said I had an unusual tax situation and had to mail it. This year was no different than any other year, just that I made a little bit more money and got a decent amount of interest. I was also upset by the fact that the state that I had to pay was filed electronically but I couldn’t pay them until my return had been electronically accepted, which happened this morning.

It was late when I called it a night, 9:30p and I was honestly tired. Not to mention the cats were getting on my nerves. I was never so glad to get to bed but had to put away the laundry and make the bed first.

Sunday (this morning), I ventured out to breakfast and the grocery store. Mailed my taxes. came home and thought about going out later for something to eat. It sounds very good but honestly, I didn’t want to bother changing clothes and getting back out in it. Temperatures are still bitterly cold here. I got in my morning nap after the groceries were put away. That was nice and both cats were next to me. I got the house cleaned, medicine prepared for next week and watched the last of Home Improvement. That show ended rather well. It got me thinking about the past, when my spouse was alive, when we got married. It was nice but also painful because it’s another reminder that I’m alone, at least for now.

Came downstairs and wrote a check to the state that I owe taxes to. I thought about it and decided to just throw my coat on and go mail the letter. It was just a quick trip down the street and back home. I didn’t change clothes, went out in sweats and a T-shirt. The car had just warmed up when I turned the engine off. I thought about making a Wendy’s run, but frozen pizza sounds better. Plus, I can play on the computer for a bit. No schedule or agenda to follow, just chilling for the rest of the day. It’s about pizza time so I will be headed up to get ready. At least I am done with taxes – now it’s just waiting for my refunds to roll in and hope that it’s smooth sailing as it normally is. Fingers crossed.

Things are supposed to warm up here by next weekend, but it will still be cold just not sub-zero cold. Hope you had a nice weekend. Back to the fun tomorrow. This is the 2^nd to last week that we will be fully staffed. The old guy retires on Friday the 13^th. I told my boss that I hope it’s not an omen for us. I know it’s going to be hellish and stressful. I am not looking forward to it at all. Kind of wish it was me that was retiring.

Take care, stay warm, be safe. Thanks for stopping by!

Cookie Monster

Morning …

I bought some Chocolate Chip Banana Bread cookies.  Two things fused together in one.  I thought it would be interesting.  It’s a wild ride that my taste buds absolutely love and can’t get enough of.  This was a store made item and I will for sure be looking for them again.  I hope that this isn’t one of those things that they make it once and you can never find it again.  I also like Chocolate Chip with Peanut Butter.  They make those regularly and they are also good but the CC BB cookies are my new favorite!

Last night I got some disturbing information.  A YouTuber that I watched for years who’s channel has long been dark was involved in a hit and run accident.  He was the one that was hit, actually T-Boned.  He suffered a stroke as a result of the accident and he’s way younger than me.  He posted the information yesterday to his social media and I saw it last night.  There is footage of him learning to walk again.  The sad part is that if you have a stroke your odds of having another one go up drastically.  I was bothered by the information and feel bad for the guy.  I know he’s got a long road ahead of him and somethings you get back and others well you don’t.  He’s got age on his side so hopefully he can make a full recovery with no deficits. 

This all took me back to when my late spouse suffered his first stroke, hours after having foot surgery.  It was due to medical negligence and he almost had a case if it wasn’t for his primary doctor being unwilling to cooperate.  If that would have happened then he would have walked away with some settlement money.  In any event I watched the whole even unfold in front of my eyes and it was highly unpleasant.  I also watched the recovery process.  He was told he would never walk again and he proved them wrong by walking out of the hospital after a month or two of therapy.  I was able to help him once he came home.  However, if this was to happen to me today I’d be fucked and not in a good way.  There is no one to lean on for daily care.  It ties into my comments from yesterday about being lonely.  It’s worse when your seriously ill and alone, that is just down right scary.  I’ve had a couple close calls with illness but managed to bounce back. 

It’s like I said yesterday, tomorrow is not promised to any of us, regardless of our health.  You never know when something will cause an upset to your health or wellbeing.  Just a reminder to not take life for granted. 

In other news, I did cancel my massage.  My back is not happy about it but I will make it.  My social media is filled with massage offers now that I’ve posted the subject here.  I haven’t really searched much for a replacement but it’s on my to do list.  If I forget I’m sure my back will remind me. 

Had some horrible Fettuccini last night.  Started off tasting okay but eventually it started tasting like I was eating Elmer’s glue.  I threw it out and just waited patiently for desert time to roll around.  Had a slice of German Chocolate Cake.  I normally eat 1/2 and save the other 1/2 for another night but last night I devoured the whole thing.  It was so good!

Got in a nice hotter than normal shower, to help sooth my muscles.  Then it was off to watch TV as I waited for an hour to pass and bedtime to roll around. 

Keeping an eye on Rudy.  He seems a bit different at times like he’s depressed or just in some zone.  Most of the time he’s perfectly normal and eating, playing and sleeping.  However I am starting to feel that there is something going on with him and this is probably going to lead to a vet visit.  Right now I’m just watching him.  I make sure to shower him with love and affection just a little bit more than normal.  He’s the salesman around here and without him this place would be almost 90% mischief free.  Mora on the other hand seems perfectly fine. 

Found out last night that we have a new critter.  Were going to be hosting a Racoon Family.  They are living under the deck.  I caught it on camera last night where a Racoon (large) came and hung around the deck.  There is a small cut out on top and somehow it contorted it’s body and went through the cutout.  This is how previous Racoons have done it and the next thing you know we have a small family.  Now it makes sense that cat was putting it’s nose in the cutout and started batting at something but I saw nothing.  Turns out it was the Racoon.  The cat hasn’t come back, not to say it won’t but a Cat & Racoon don’t mix well.  It’s been several years since we had Racoons.  I think they are cute and neat, so long as I am looking at them from inside my home.  I know that they can be destructive and dangerous.  I had an encounter with one in person years ago and am lucky to have walked away from that uninjured.  I won’t press my luck again. 

Well, calm day at work.  No meetings and honestly nothing really on my calendar.  I took care of my morning tasks.  I get an extra week of reprieve from on-call because I am working Thanksgiving.  I remember that I had to flop things around so someone didn’t get pissed off by having to work Thanksgiving.  I am actually contemplating taking some time off next week.  Haven’t made it official yet.  Right now I am just trying to skate through today.  Tomorrow is pretty much a repeat of today and I’m not complaining.  It does make for a long day when you have nothing to do but I survive.  Besides that I have no idea when all hell will break loose and my calm day will be interrupted, so I am on stand by all day.  If nothing happens great it’s a win for me. 

Hope it’s a great day for all of us.  Take care!

Clock Sucker

Hey it’s Monday again, yuck!

Saturday I made it out to get some breakfast & a Cinnamon & Raisin biscuit.  I was too full to enjoy the Cinnamon & Raisin biscuit and brought it home.  I got to eat it this morning it was really good!  Grabbed the mail and then got my haircut. 

I was tired so I came back home and went back to bed.  It was super cold out and I just wasn’t in the mood to be out and about. 

Later in the afternoon I made it out for Mexican food at the place by the office.  Made it to the office and grabbed my calendar, changed the page on the calendar in my office and got out of dodge. 

On the drive home it decided to sprinkle and then rain a bit, which was no fun but I made it no problems. 

Started adjusting clocks before bed.  Told the cats they would be all confused and so would I for a couple days when it comes to time.  Got to bed and it was an okay day. 

Sunday I woke up early but went back to sleep and then woke up again just had to get Rudy taken care of he wouldn’t leave me alone.  Thinking that I overslept but it was the time change that got him.  I passed out breakfast and got dressed.  Killed a little bit of time before I finally left. 

The place where I eat breakfast at was super full and I was much earlier than I usually am.  I still got in and got something to eat.  It was too early for Target so I hit up the grocery store first.  Then afterwards made my Target run. 

I was so surprised that Target was cleared out of Coke & Pepsi.  I had to get more Dr. Pepper and some 7UP, I’m kind of tired of Dr. Pepper.  The cherry stuff tastes mostly cherry and there isn’t any Dr. Pepper I can taste.  It is okay but I’m dying for a Diet Cola.  Picked up some new cat litter.  Then came home. 

Got everything put away and time to rest.  Yesterday was the day that seemed like it would never ever end.  By the time I got up and got moving it was 11a.  I opted to fiddle with the Timer on the front door and that turned out to be a huge time suck.  Seems as if it was on it’s last legs.  It was asking for a backup battery.  I replaced it but it didn’t register and when I pulled the battery holder out the battery was hot, which wasn’t a good sign.  I made the time adjustments and then tried to get it to recognize the battery which turned out to be futile.  I probably should have just walked away but that’s not in me.  I started looking for replacements and found one at Lowe’s.  I should have gone to Home Depot because they had what I really needed but I didn’t find that out until much later in the day.

I got a replacement timer from Lowe’s which took a bit to find, it wasn’t where the website said it was.  The packaging made it impossible to open and I had to destroy the packaging to get the damn thing open.  Turns out I never could get it working and that didn’t please me.  There was no returning it because the original packaging was destroyed and I wasn’t in the mood to argue or debate a point.  I just took the loss.  Wound up going back buying a light switch and now I am manually controlling the outside lights with a switch.  Ordered a replacement timer from Amazon last night and it will be here later this week.  I’m going to give that a go and if it doesn’t work well then I will fall back to the switch and just give up. 

Thankfully the backdoor timer was simple I just pressed a button to put it back on schedule and it’s working fine.  If I get this new timer installed it will have an atomic clock in it so no more messing with clock changing it will auto update and be just like the one on the backdoor.  I could easily swap the backdoor to the front door and go back to a switch for the back but I’d just as soon not.  It’s times like these that I wish my spouse was still alive so he could work his electrical magic.  However, I’ve gotten out of bigger messes than this. 

I was late in getting the cat litter swapped out and scared the cats but that job is done.  I was planning on going out for a bit to eat and sit down at a restaurant but I was too tired so I talked myself into McDonald’s.  I haven’t had that in a very long time.  Double Quarter Pounder and Medium Fry.  It was pretty good. 

Spent the night with the cats on the couch just lounging.  I needed a shower but just didn’t feel like it.  I will get that taken care of tonight. 

My brother’s birthday card went in the mail on Saturday so hopefully he will have it either on or shortly after his birthday.  I don’t expect anything to come from that but glad that I went through with getting it in the mail. 

Monday seems to be a busy day I have been going since a little before 7:30a and just now had time to write this.  I am getting sleepy and going to take advantage of the fact that I am no longer on call and venture upstairs.  Hopefully no one will bother me and I can take a break. 

I am supposed to work on the on-call calendar for next year this afternoon but I may put that off, it’s not like it’s needed tomorrow or anything.  However, the sooner I start the sooner I will finish. 

We have had a couple of frosts here and yesterday I broke out the heavy coat.  Not looking forward to coat weather I feel like the Michelin Man it’s just a bit much but I will get used to it.  Need to break out some long sleeves and I don’t look forward to that either.  I’m all about short sleeves and no jacket or coat however can’t do that in the winter I’d freeze to death and for sure get sick. 

Hope you had a great weekend.  I still have a few clocks to adjust and then that little task is behind me.  Take care and thanks for stopping by. 

Heavenly Birthday

Welcome in …

Today would be my late spouses birthday.  I still miss him everyday and somedays the loss feels much greater.  Happy Heavenly Birthday Sweetie!

I’ve thought about how him and my cats would get along.  I think that they would both hit it off quite well.  Of course one or both of them would have probably tripped him by now but other than that I think that he would really love them.

Speaking of pets not sure if any of you follow Tyler & Todd they are Vloggers on You Tube.  Yesterday they announced they lost their dog Charlie.  I could just tell by the title of the video what was about to be announced.  I was ready for it but once they confirmed it I just sobbed like I lost a loved one.  Not sure what Charlie’s age was but he had cancer and they went to great lengths to save him.  They got another year of life out of him, which is exactly what they wanted.  I feel so bad for them as I’ve been down the pet loss road many times.  They have a couple other dogs and a cat to keep them company, it’s just a matter of getting used to a new normal.  My condolences to them. 

If your not familiar with Tyler & Todd they renovated some shipping containers to build a gorgeous house in the middle of the woods in Canada.  Their work is amazing and I think they are both quite handy, they had some help from friends and contractors but the end result looks stunning and it’s something they are both quite proud of.  I’ve watched them for about a year and always look forward to a new video, which typically comes out on Sunday’s.  Occasionally they surprise and release a Wednesday update as well. 

Closer to home I went out in the rain to fetch Chili, a Cheeseburger and Frosty.  I was unhappy when I got home to find that I wasn’t given any crackers or hot sauce.  I was more upset by the lack of crackers.  I did burn my mouth on the Chili but still in all it was delicious and I gobbled it all up.  It was the perfect meal for a soggy Sunday afternoon and afforded me time to cuddle with the cats and watch TV.

My new computer glasses seem to work great when I use them in combination with my laptop instead of my desktop.  I think the prescription needs to be tweaked a bit and then they would work fine regardless of the computer setup.  At least I didn’t waste my money but I am a little disappointed. 

As were close to Halloween either tonight or tomorrow I will be disabling the automatic timers that control the exterior lights.  I find that my security cameras work great in the dark with no light, which is kind of amazing.  We were one of the first houses to start turning lights on at night and it’s caught on throughout the neighborhood, not everyone has bought in but a good majority of people do.  Of course a good majority join with me in powering lights off as it gets close to Halloween.  It’s kind of messed up here kids get two or sometimes three nights they are permitted to Trick or Treat and they get a parade to go with it.  Back home where I grew up we got Halloween night and that’s it, no parade.  However, it’s been this way long before I moved here some 20 years ago and I don’t foresee it changing. 

I am more excited for Thanksgiving and the first snow.  From what I’ve seen in forecast models looks like it’s going to be a very wet winter.  Might not all be snow could be rain.  However, we got the big snow last year so I’m honestly not expecting anything huge this Winter but one never knows. 

I’m on-call this week and not happy about it.  I’ve got plans for the weekend to make it to the office to turn the calendar in my office and hopefully pickup a new calendar that the company provides.  I’ll stop in at the local Mexican place nearby to make it a combo trip.  Plus I have an haircut booked early in the morning and found out yesterday Cinnamon Raisin Biscuits are back at Carl’s Jr/Hardees at least in my neck of the woods.  I’ve got plans to have one of those along with a Sausage & Egg Biscuit.  It’s only Monday and already I’ve got plans for Saturday!

Here’s hoping it’s a great week for all of us.  Take care and thank you for stopping by.

The Weekend

Welcome in …

It’s been overcast here all weekend and it rains on and off.  Light showers and nothing terribly serious. 

I went out for Cat food and the mail yesterday.  Of course it was bone dry until I pulled out of the garage and then the rain drops started falling. 

Kind of an expensive trip to the cat food store but it’s odd that the total came up to the last 4 digits of my late spouses SSN.  It’s probably nothing but I take as he is still watching out for me. 

I came home after that little trip to put the cat food away, open the mail and then kill a little bit of time before I left for the big trip. 

I headed out to the buffet and wow I wished I hadn’t.  The food was horrible this time.  I didn’t eat a whole lot.  Little bit of fried chicken, some pork, awful mashed potatoes, corn and green beans.  I had some Peach Cobbler for desert.  Got a soda to go and then I got on the road to home. 

Got behind a farm implement that was moving slow and a truck behind that that didn’t want to pass.  I played that little game for a short time but once I saw I had a clear shot I pushed down on the pedal and the turbo kicked in and I was flying.  I got up to 110mph before I let off the gas.  This was an old country road and no one was around, it wasn’t the smartest thing to do but it was fun.  That sucked some gas but like I said it was fun.  I got a new app that pairs with my radar detector, the default setting in it is set to 80mph and once it senses you reach that speed it tells you to slow down.  I can change that to any speed I want but it was nice to hear it bark at me. 

Made it home just before 6p and it was starting to get dark.  I came in and got laundry started.  Worked on bills, taming a bit of email and general surfing.  The cats kept me company and as usual Mora couldn’t stay out of my lap for terribly long.  She loves to garner my attention when I am about to start working.

Got the laundry done, went up and made the bed.  Rudy tried to help me.  I was ready for bed and it was only 8p.  I called it and started my shutdown routine.  Rudy acted like he wanted to play but I tried to entertain that and then he wanted nothing to do with it.  Mora wouldn’t budge either, just as well because I was in no mood for it. 

Made it to my chair to relax and about an hour later I was climbing in bed getting ready to pass out. 

Had a nightmare of a dream and woke up at 5a.  I tried to avoid getting up but my bladder said it was time so I took care of it.  Came back to bed.  Rudy was all fired up making his biscuits and doing his dance, thinking he could possibly get some food out of it but I told him we had a couple more hours and then I’d be up.  He laid down and then we both went back to sleep.  I woke up ten minutes earlier than I wanted to and Rudy went back to dancing so he got breakfast. 

I headed out was supposed to make a Target run but it was raining and that just made me push it to next weekend.  I made it to breakfast.  Ate way more than I should have but it was good.  Went to the grocery store.  Saw that my favorite cashier was working.  She is an older lady and her birthday is next month, she told me that weeks ago.  I capitalized on that today and got her a gift card to Cracker Barrel.  She was quite surprised and told me that is more than her husband would do for her.  I told her to enjoy herself.  It was nice to make someone’s day. 

I got a birthday card for my brother it’s kind of sappy, I’m hoping to appeal to him to reach out to me but I’m fairly certain he won’t and that I just wasted my money.  However, it’s the though that counts and it’s more than he did for me on my birthday.  Just letting him know that I am still out here and that I am thinking of him. 

Rudy is passed out in my lap and has been for a couple hours.  His tail beating away on my metal desk drawer sounds like a drum.  He loves to wag that tail when he sleeps in my lap.  He looks so peaceful and sweet.  We had some issues earlier today when he decided to climb up on the kitchen table while I was working on cleaning the water fountain.  For some reason when I work on that both cats seem to go crazy with playing.  Mora is on a chair behind me sleeping away. 

I need to move my laundry to the dryer and head up.  With the weather the way it is today is a perfect day for some Chili and a Burger.  I plan to make a Wendy’s run in about an hour, bring it back home to enjoy with the cats as we start the evening. 

My massage on Friday was okay but as per usual it just stirred things up and I am sore but still have knots.  I need a longer session and on a much more regular basis.  I hear the person before me making an appointment and looks like the therapist is going to work on Friday’s but only during the day.  Last appointment is at 3:30p and that’s not going to work for me.  She said that she was trying to be flexible to meet everyone’s schedules.  I didn’t bother to schedule anything else I’ve got 1 more appointment in a couple weeks on a Wednesday and right now I am unsure if I will keep it.  I kind of hate to stop but at the same time I liked Saturday appointments and she stopped those.  Friday evenings worked perfect and she’s stopping that.  Two price increases in less than a year and I’ve been going to her for at least 3 years.  If she can’t accommodate my schedule then I’ve kind of got no choice but to drop her.  I’m one of a small group of people that are her regulars so you’d think that she would want to keep me as a client.  I’m frustrated over it but it’s not the end of the world.  I could always go buy a car with seats that massage and that would put her ass out of business.  I just don’t want a car payment but I do want the new car. 

Hope it’s been a great weekend for you and that you’ve been able to stay warm in the cooler weather we have been having.  Take care!

Birds the word

My cameras have gone off a couple times letting me know that a “person” was detected.  Turns out it’s a bird flying in front of the cameras.  Not sure what that is about but I’d rather see that than an actual person because I’m not expecting any visitors. 

Yesterday I had the post all prepared and was about to publish it when my internet dropped.  Apparently there was a power failure or so that is what I was told.  I had to fail over to my cell phone and it was just about time to head up for the day.  I just waited until it came back up and then published the post.  Here’s hoping that I have solid internet connectivity from now until the end of the year.  I say that because outages have occurred more this year than in a very long time.  I’m glad that I have my cell phone to fall back on, otherwise I’d be totally lost. 

Had an average evening nothing to really write about.  I got hungry hours after I had Lasagna and tried some Strawberry Cheesecake Hagen Daz.  Wow that was really good.  I just had a little bit of it so I could savor it.  Wish there wasn’t so much graham cracker in it.  Not sure who thought that one up but they did a good job!

Nothing more on dating at the moment, I have looked but the alerts stopped and so have messages.  I’ve got a few more weeks before both of my subscriptions expire and then I will delete my profiles as well as the apps, unless of course I happen to talk with someone and things are promising.  Might dive into different apps but I mostly see myself taking a break for a bit.  It’s kind of exhausting.  However, it would be nice to meet a guy so that I never had to get on an app again. 

Work is mostly calm and it’s better without the boss.  I hope this theme continues while he is out.  Next week won’t be a whole lot of fun for me because I will be back on-call.  However, I’ll cross that bridge once I get to it.  Right now it’s all about relaxing and enjoying the days as they go by. 

Hard to believe that tomorrow we will be in October.  My birthday month sure did go by fast.  I’m not a huge October fan because my late spouse and my late mom’s birthdays occur towards the end of the month.  They are actually a couple days apart.  In years past it was always something fun to look forward to.  Not so much now. 

Hope your having a good day!

Adventures on Saturday

Hi and welcome in!

I signed up for another dating app for 1 month.  I realized quickly after I subscribed that I wasted my money.  The filters don’t really work on this app and I see guys that are way out of my area.  I’ve gotten a like from 2 guys so far but neither was appealing to me.  1 like from a woman, which is of no interest to me.  Woke up to several notifications from this app that 1 guy sent me a message and that I had likes pending.  I wasn’t too concerned with it as I figured it would be nothing, just as it was. 

I was up early and went back to bed for more sleep, then had a horrible breakfast (it was a frozen sausage, egg & cheese croissant) I bought them in bulk from Sam’s and will never ever do that again.  They taste way different.  Wound up having a Chocolate Muffin and after a while wound up going back for more sleep.  Rudy was all about the sleep and curled up on top of me both times when I went back.  He’s really something else. 

I finally woke up later this morning and passed out lunch for the cats.  I watched a little TV and then decided that I needed to get in gear and start moving.  Got my shower, once dressed I threw my bedding in the laundry and said my goodbye’s to the cats. 

Went over for cat food, which was slim picking.  They also didn’t have any special hairball food or sensitive stomach food.  Yet I managed to spend $50.  I will look for more food at Target & The Grocery Store.  I am thinking of going back to the pet food store where I adopted the cats from to see if they have any better selection. 

Anyway after I got their food I headed off to the buffet.  I had the desire a couple times to turn around.  Shame I didn’t give in to that instinct.  The food looked so good but it tasted horrible.  They changed the breading they use for the fish and chicken.  The chicken tasted more like Frog.  Even the Bread Pudding tasted a little off.  I don’t plan on returning to this place until maybe next year.  I will stick with the other buffet I found.  Travel time to both places is roughly the same.  Just I know my way by heart to this place I went to today because it’s a place we (me and my late spouse) used to visit all the time. 

On the way back I stopped at the post office and am so glad that I saved it for last because I was overloaded with mail.  2 packages and a few letters plus mail order prescriptions.  It was the most mail I have had in a very long time. 

I am finishing up laundry, already done my usual surfing, email catch up and paid bills. 

Turned 75,000 miles on the vehicle during my trip.  On my way home it sounded like a rock or something hit the windshield but I never saw anything.  There aren’t any obvious new cracks or chips.  Guess I will see if anything shows up tomorrow after a car wash.  The windshield is covered in bugs and I even hit a butterfly, which I wasn’t terribly happy about.  The deer are migrating and grazing.  I had a couple in my front yard at 6:30a this morning.  Thankfully the cats and I were asleep or they would have freaked out.  My biggest fear is that a deer will come in contact with my vehicle and smash it all up.

That’s pretty much a wrap on Saturday.  My stomach is telling me it’s time for more food but I have no idea on what to eat, guess I will graze in the kitchen.  I normally don’t get hungry and well if the food would have been better I can assure you that I wouldn’t be hungry now. 

Talk with you all again soon.

Steak & Cheese

I’ve long seen a Steak & Cheese sandwich from Stouffers in the freezer case at the grocery store.  It talked about air frying so I always passed it up.  This past weekend I pulled one out to see if it could be microwaved and sure enough it can.  I had it for supper last night and it was so small I wished that I had a second sandwich.  It was delicious and I will be grabbing a few more of these when I go back on Sunday.  Nice to have something new to add to my selection pool. 

The cluster project wrapped up yesterday.  Someone created a problem in the process and with some trial & error I was able to fix it this morning.  That felt really good to get that win under my belt. 

Nothing really spectacular going on at work, just normal day to day stuff.  I’ve been lending my helping hand out more since the workload doesn’t every stop for our help desk folks.  Most of the time things go off with out a hitch but every once and a while I grab something that looks to be simple and it turns into a complete cluster and I wished that I wouldn’t have been helpful in the first place.  Yet I keep going back for more because I like to help people.

In life I go out of the way to be a good human in the hopes that it will come back to me.  Yet it seems that life isn’t exactly kind to me.  The things I want and that would do wonders to help me don’t seem to happen.  For some reason I have this fight response and just keep clawing and chipping away until I finally hit a dead end.  I wasn’t like that until I lost my spouse and had to fight with Unions, Banks and Attorneys.  That whole experience re-shaped me in that I just don’t accept no for an answer when I know that it’s possible.  A lot of people stop at the first no they get and give up – most people and companies expect that but not me.  It doesn’t exactly do wonders for my blood pressure but when I do get a win it feels really good. 

Speaking of chipping away I am still working the dating app.  Thinking about signing up on another app just to give me better odds.  I know it’s more money but better odds is what I am after.  I really want to find a boyfriend and if possible make some new friends as well.

We are so close to the weekend I can almost taste it.  I think back to last week at this time I was so looking forward to Friday.  A lot can change in a week.  I’m still excited for this Friday but only because now it marks the end of the week.  I’m planning on going to visit friends, visiting a buffet that I haven’t been to in a while, grabbing mail and cat food.  Who knows what will actually materialize but it’s nice to have plans. 

Don’t work too hard.  Take care!