31 August 2015

Call no more

So happy that Monday is here.  I got calls last night up until 10:30p.  Then it was all quiet until around 4:30a when one of my co-workers emailed to say he wasn’t coming in.  Then another one emailed later in the morning.  I slept okay but I think I pinched a nerve.  When I walk it feels like there is a vibrator stuck in my foot.  Very strange.  It doesn’t hurt just annoying. 

My boss changed up the shift schedule.  My hours didn’t change just what I do and when changed.  Now I will be on the phones in the morning and then have my afternoons free to do runner or project work.  That will probably work out good since most of the meetings I setup for are in the afternoon. 

Powered on the laptop finally.  I had plenty of programs that wanted to apply updates.  Not a bad thing.  However, with Windows 10 it seems that Microsoft is pushing more and more updates.  I hope they eventually slow down, it seems like it’s every other day or at least once a week since the release. 

Apple has a big event next week.  The rumor is they are going to talk about Apple TV and introduce new iPhones which is typically done this time of year.  What might stop people from upgrading is the cost.  A lot of carriers in the US are no longer subsidizing the cost of the phone so if you want it, you buy it for full price or go on a plan where you make monthly payments towards the cost of the phone.  If you go on a plan to make monthly payments you will wind up paying more for the phone than if you just parted with cash.  As for me I will still try to get a 2 year contract and pay a subsidized price.  I am told that option is still available through AT&T but you have to call and it depends upon how long you have been a customer.  Yeah I’ve been there since day 1 so they shouldn’t have any issues with taking care of me.  I don’t have plans to upgrade considering I just did it last year.  I stay 1 model behind because it’s cheaper that way.  Plus by the time you add on accessories the cost of a phone gets pretty expensive, it’s more than a desktop computer.  Kind of crazy. 

Last night I watched a documentary on HBO on Demand about Greg Louganis and the ups and downs of his career.  When he was younger he sure was a looker.  Age hasn’t done him an injustice but he doesn’t look youthful, at least to me.  It sounded like things were going to end on a sad note but they didn’t.  He’s married now and from the way the documentary talked he is very happy. 

That’s all of the news I have right now.  I am really tired and looking forward to heading home but there are like 4 1/2 more hours until that happens.  So now I am going to get ready for lunch.  Got me a tasty sandwich and I can watch some TV and Youtube.  Not a bad way to spend lunch.  Take care and happy Monday. 

30 August 2015

Sunday not Fun day

I accomplished my mission of getting to breakfast and the grocery store without any interruption.  In fact it was a couple hours before I got my first call, which was around 11a.  I have been kept busy.  Every time I tried to take a nap the phone would go off.  It was like someone had a camera on me.  I got a quick cat nap in but nothing substantial.  Laundry was done quickly.  Time got away from me and I have to skip vacuuming, the only ones happy about that are the other residents here (aka cats). 

We had a small outage today.  I started seeing repeat calls about the same thing.  I made mention of it to the Network guy but he said oh it’s just people being stupid.  Yeah, okay.  Turns out I was right and it wasn’t until we had 3 calls for the same thing within minutes that the issue was discovered and fixed.  I have had one or two calls since that but it sounds like things are going to get quiet, or so I hope. 

I was able to squeeze in a shave, shower and managed to eat supper as well as wrangle the trash.  My mom called while I was eating but I let her go to voice mail.  She told me that her cell phone was stolen.  It’s a pre-paid phone and she tried to call her carrier but says they were closed.  Okay if you don’t care I don’t care.  There is usually someone there that can suspend service 24/7.  It’s her battle to fight.  She hung her purse on the back of a chair at a local mall while her and my brother were eating.  They left and she forgot her purse.  She went back and someone had turned in her purse, minus the phone.  It wouldn’t surprise me if the phone was still in the house somewhere, but she says it was stolen.  Then she told me all about her night.  The neighbors rioting again and she had to call the police.  The police catered to her paranoia and told her they would beef up patrols, she should call if there were any other problems.  Then she said oh they have a police radio, they can hear our conversation.  Yeah, uh that’s not the case.  Police radios are for the police to talk on to their dispatcher.  Her and I were communicating on VOIP which is transmitted over the internet and there isn’t a way a radio could pick that up.  Now someone could have listened to our conversation on the internet that is presuming the packets were not secured and I honestly don’t know if either of us has an encrypted connection.  I did some searching but couldn’t determine.  At any rate I doubt that anyone is remotely interested in anything that either of us have to say.  Mom said that she would call me if she had any problems.  Yeah uh okay.  What exactly do you think I am going to do?  If you chose nothing, then give your self a pat on the back.  Unless she is in real danger or there is a serious medical problem, those are the only two circumstances that would cause me to act.  Otherwise I will just listen and push it aside.  Bottom line here is she is lonely and I am not sure if it’s her or her mental condition that is dreaming up the problems.  It’s all to get attention.

I was able to see what will be deposited in my bank accounts tomorrow.  I had enough money to pay for my auto insurance in cash, but if I did then I would have to live on $100 for 3 weeks, which is impossible to do between cat food and my food we would never make it.  So I opted to charge the auto insurance.  I will pay for it when the bill comes due next month.  Now I am all out of bills but I have money left over.  There soon will be more bills and expenses here to take away my money.  It’s a never ending cycle, even after you die there will be companies that still want their pound of flesh.

Here’s hoping that the remainder of the night and early morning hours are silent.  I just want to go eat my Chocolate Ice Cream, prepare my lunch and be able to relax before getting ready for bed.  I never look forward to Monday’s that is until I am on call.  Now I work all this week and then next weekend I will have 3 days off because next Monday is Labor Day.  Nice!  I see that on the 23rd we celebrate the first day of Fall aka Autumn.  Just bring on the pumpkin stuff and the Sausage Stuffing on Turkey day - - My stomach will be happy.

I hope that your weekend was enjoyable.  I was sad to learn that James Earl Jones passed away.  He had a most amazing voice and was a very good actor as well.  Another one of the greats is gone.  I will talk with you all again soon.  Be well. 

29 August 2015

Time Poor

So it seems that my days at work are getting busier, at least that was the case last week.  I found myself on more than one occasion running at 100mph.  Friday I got yelled at again by someone needing help, it wasn’t nearly as bad as earlier in the week and this particular person loves to yell when it comes to technology problems.  I was able to let it go but it didn’t exactly make my day.

My poor personal laptop hasn’t been powered on for 3 business days straight.  I will try to change that on Monday, but that can be a known busy day of the week.  Friday night was peaceful I got to fill up my tank (gas prices went up on the way home, making me wish I would have filled up in the morning), pick up the mail, grab cat food and then come home.  I had Stouffers Lasagna and I made Garlic Bread.  I ate entirely too much food but that was sort of the point. 

Saturday morning started around 9a with my first call.  I have had a few thus far.  One that was particularly challenging but I got it fixed.  I had a lady call me from a conference room because she needed to add a printer.  Problem is that she left me the internal extension number to dial.  It took some creative thinking on my part to be able to reach her.  Of course she didn’t leave her name.  My hope is that Sunday will be about as busy or less busy than today has been.  I was able to squeeze in a nap for a couple hours which really pleased me. 

Last night my mom called and told me how the neighbors started a lynch mob to run her out of the neighborhood.  She told me they had listening devices and they were rattling the windows.  One breath she said she wasn’t leaving the next breath she said in six months she was selling the house and going to move.  Paranoid Delusions is all this is.  She has to constantly have drama or life has no purpose.  If there isn’t drama, she makes it up.  It’s all part of her mental disease.  I just listened.  I actually broke out in laughter at one point and she told me how serious she was.  I gained my composure and listened to her babble on.  I tried more than once to change the subject but that doesn’t work with her, she has a one track mind and until she is done saying her peace she won’t forget the track she is on.  Now that is when she is passionate about something, ask her what was for breakfast yesterday and she won’t remember.  Ask her about something, anything in the past and there may be some memory.

The children are making the most of daddy being home.  I have been pestered quite a bit today.  Be it for food, attention, belly rubs or just because they like to see me try to figure out the mystery of what they want.  Big Boy started sawing logs, it’s always nice to hear him snore.  It’s not obnoxious like a human being.

So to help occupy my time, I have done some porn surfing this morning.  I also got 5 pairs of glasses coming for home try on from Warby Parker.  Then I ordered myself a blowjob robot.  How’s that for a birthday present.  One of my female co-workers asked me out to lunch next week, so were going to the new Mexican place.  I sure hope it’s good. 

Looking forward to tomorrow to know how much money I will be getting on Monday, which is pay day.  The big bills are waiting and everyone wants their money.  I am interested in knowing how much I will have left over.  Because there are other operating expenses that I need to pay for like groceries, gasoline, cat food and dining out.  Then of course there is my bi-weekly massage.

I also re-watched Tosh.O because I passed out in the middle of it.  I also watched the last episode of Suits because I missed the first 1/2 thanks to my DVR because it had a technical issue.  I heard this catchy tune and wanted to know who sung it and used Shazam and found out the details.  I bought the song from iTunes, it’s 99 cents that is so worth it.  For your listening enjoyment the video appears below.  Give it a listen and I think you will agree it’s awesome!  Talk with you peeps later.

27 August 2015


This day didn’t start off good.  I was tired when I rolled out of bed and really didn’t want to go to work.  I know seems to be a recurring theme.  Anyway I get to work and the cute guy that I have a crush on, comes up to me and tells me that he is leaving.  His last day will be in a couple weeks.  That just ruined my day.  I wanted to say now who am I going to look at, but I didn’t.  He did get an honest surprised reaction out of me.  Even though he is straight I wouldn’t mind him having an affair with me.  I’d love to come out to him and let him know how I feel, but that wouldn’t serve any purpose and would probably wind up hurting me.  Funny thing is I had just asked God to help me control my feelings for this guy.  I guess with him leaving that will solve that problem.  I also asked to win the lottery and got my $5 winning ticket. 

It was another busy day.  It the second time this week that I haven’t had time to power up my personal laptop.  There is good and bad with that but honestly, I would rather be doing what I am paid to do.  It keeps me in the good graces of my boss. 

Tonight’s mail brought me my eye glass prescription that I asked for.  Opening the envelope I cut the document in half.  Thank God for tape.  Then I get a notice from my mortgage company.  It was an escrow statement.  I was hoping for a check to be attached but instead I got a notice that my house payment is going up.  There will be a shortage in the account.  I can pay a lump sum to help catch it up and still get a higher payment or just make a higher payment.  They earn interest on my money so I think I will just take the higher payment instead of parting with a lump sum of money.  I am so glad that I held out from buying a new car.  I still have plenty of cushion to play with every month and I really don’t want to commit it to a vehicle or anything else. 

No calls last night and I hope for the same tonight.  One more day and then I get to see what kind of fun I will have over the weekend.  Still praying, hoping and wishing for quiet or at the very least a slow pace.  Normally there aren’t any calls after 9p on weekends but I still have to be available just in case.  Saturday I pretty much chalk up to staying at home.  Sunday I want out to get my breakfast and shop for groceries and then I will be back home. 

Now up to sit with the muffins and watch TV until it’s once again time to climb into bed.  Speaking of the children they are all doing well.  I had some fun today with Gator when I started watching on the camera. Happy almost Friday everyone!

26 August 2015

Bad Experience

I had a very bad on-call experience last night.  First my co-workers who cover the late shift decided to leave early, but they didn’t tell anyone.  Someone called for help and I got to deal with that someone who was a screaming asshole.  This was a late night event that started at 10:30 and didn’t get done until 11:15 but I was already up and couldn’t go back to sleep.  This event took away sleep, consumed most of my day and I probed different avenues that I could proceed down.  I found out that nothing will be done to the asshole who was the aggressor because of his stature.  However, I asked about what if I would have engaged and barked back at the aggressor oh now there is concern and I would have been in deep shit.  This is pure bullshit and the total reason why I didn’t want to ever work for the type of business I am apart of.  I am appreciated, well paid but I shouldn’t have to deal with verbal abuse.  I am very upset that I was lied to and deceived.  I brought these concerns with me to my interview and they were put to rest quickly and once I started HR even gave this pomp and circumstance speech about how verbal abuse isn’t tolerated.  Lying pieces of shit! My bosses reaction was let it go and don’t worry about it.  Lovely that is NOT the response I anticipated. 

I am just now starting to let go.  Not that you care but I haven’t had an orgasm in 3 days, add this along with a night of about 4 hours sleep and you have one pissed off homosexual.  If this occurs again with the same person, I found someone who is on my side and who will squash it quickly.

I am reasonably comfortable at my job and I don’t want to have to walk on pins and needles every day.  I have done that dance and it’s quite uncomfortable.  There is a lot at stake and I am considering looking for a new job.  I have to have a steady job and a stable income or everything that I worked so hard to keep will fall by the wayside and the black mark will go on my credit report. 

The best news of the day is that I won the lottery again.  Yeah a whole $5 but it’s better than nothing.  I was hoping for a sizeable win to buy a car, get a new roof and pay off all of my debt.  I could live very comfortably then and afford a vacation and to do other things that I would like to explore. 

Now on to tonight's entertainment.  Suits on USA.  This is the season finale and the stars say watch it live not recorded because it will be a good show. The Firm will never be the same again.  Okay, you got me hooked.  Time to go check it out. 

Here’s hoping that the remainder of this on-call hell hole that I am in goes much smoother and quieter.  I should be much happier this time next week, even if I will be a year older. 

Finally, a couple of guys that I have crushes on (that I know are straight) have reacted to a post on my FB page.  It’s about Windows 10 and the reporting feature that could easily out a child to his parents.  This is a sensitive subject and I got the impression that they both were trying to incite an argument.  I responded to both of them and hope that quashes the matter.  I don’t want to lose a friend over sharing an article.  Then again if I do were they really that much of a friend in the first place?

Okay in the words of Joey Graceffa…. Good Damn Bye!

25 August 2015

Traffic Tuesday

I did everything right and still wound up in traffic.  Got up early, got moving early, got out the door early.  I guess today wasn’t meant to be a speedy day.  I still made it to work in plenty of time.  Then I am walking in and saw a co-worker she was talking about a baby bird.  I didn’t realize it was in her hand.  She saw it outside by the door, it appears to have a wing injury but it let her pick it up.  She is going to have someone take it to a nearby sanctuary, poor thing it looks hurt, scared and it might even be hungry but it’s very tiny. 

So things have calmed down here at work since the Monday rush.  We still have some pending issues but that is just job security I think.  I had a quiet night of on-call but the phone was buzzing all the way up until the time I went to bed.  It gets kind of aggravating but I don’t have to do anything, just press delete. I don’t start until 11p each night.  Thankfully we are not a International or Global Firm so night time is typically quiet time and that is a good thing.  I don’t sleep that well being in on-call mode.

I got Marvin’s claws trimmed last night.  He protested by not sleeping with me.  That is two nights in a row.  I have to give him medicine tonight so there is another reason why he will boycott me, but I hope he doesn’t.  I like sleeping with him and once I am out he goes to his end of the bed and it’s sweet dreams for everyone. 

My biggest problem last night was trying to find something to watch.  I finally landed on a stand up comedy special, it was okay.  Tonight I have Tosh.O to look forward to.  It’s a half hour but it’s better than nothing.  I am trying to stay away from the computer as much as possible and relax.  The weekend will be stressful and I might as well relax while i can. 

The other big challenge is what to have for supper.  I am thinking about soup tonight.  Last night it was Steak Fajita’s.  I have plenty of TV Dinners but they do get old after a while.  I needs to find me a man that can cook both on the stove and in bed.  Then I don’t know what I would complain about because my belly would be full and I would be exhausted from the workout in bed.  Amazing how one person can solve my problems. 

It’s going to be a long afternoon but that’s okay, quitting time will come eventually.  Looking forward to going home to see my babies. Especially my Big Boy.  He’s been a very hungry and demanding guy lately.  He needs an old fashioned bath but I won’t give into that until next week when I know I have time for it.  He won’t be anxious for it anyway.

Well off to stir up some trouble, or something like that.  Happy Tuesday, I only wish I were at home napping.  That sounds really good right about now. 

24 August 2015

Make it stop already

Ever have one of those days where you just want it to stop?  That is how I feel about today.  It’s been nuts so far.  I decided to sleep in 5 minutes, got in back to school traffic which means no good parking spot.  Then from the second I walked in work just hit me.  It was intense go here, go there, do this, do that. 

My phone is on vibrate because when a message come through from our ticketing service my phone is set to make a lot of noise.  I don’t want to disturb others but when I am away from my desk it’s tough to feel the vibration, so I miss emails.  It’s only one week but it’s one of many things I hate about being on-call.  I put the final touches on my phone to ready it for on call when I got up.  Now the only other thing I have to do is at work in turning off rules and adding myself to the on-call group.  Then the fun starts, but I am not up to bat until 11p and things go back to normal at 7a.  I am still crossing my fingers for a quiet and uneventful week.

I watched a sermon from Jason & DeMarco last night via You Tube.  Kind of interesting but long.  I learned there is such a thing as a miniature donkey and they live for 40 years.  I looked them up to see a photo and they are cute.  I’d like to be around one and see how it goes.  They are supposed to be playful like a dog or a cat. 

So the claw trimming went very well.  I lifted up the couch and there she was, just sitting there and crying.  She knew what was coming but wasn’t hip to it.  I got her all taken care of and she got a brushing as well.  No effect on our friendship, things were back to normal as soon as I had food in my hands.  Everyone but Marvin is done and I will be attacking him tonight.  His nails are in the process of starting to curl.  No one likes their nails trim but Ruth is the only one that protests and requires the welding gloves.  They all have to know I love them for as much as I do for them.

I got my blog re-listed on Best Male Blogs so perhaps that will bring me some new readers, if so welcome!

Last night on Last Week Tonight with John Oliver, he showed while it’s legal for gay people to get married, there are still many states where it’s still okay to discriminate or fire a person because of their sexuality.  My home state is not one of them.  But the state that I work in is one of them.  While Marriage Equality is universal, you can still be turned down for a loan, get fired from your job or even refused service in a restaurant – all based on your sexual preference.  I fail to see how sexual preference indicates your likelihood to pay back a loan.  I mean most gay people don’t have kids so there is a lot of disposable income, still everyone's situation is different.  Your performance on your job has nothing to do with your sexual preference or how you perform your job.  It also has nothing to do with how you eat your food or behave in public.  There is a bill in Congress according to Mr. Oliver that has no Republican Support and it sounds like the bill will die.  Only time will tell. 

The craziness from this morning has carried over into the afternoon.  I like to be busy but I don’t like chasing my tail or being crazy busy.  Looks like I am in for a hell of a ride.  Off to the races.  Talk with you folks again soon.  Thanks for stopping by!

23 August 2015

New Format

I’ve been thinking about changing things up here for a while and today I finally did it!  I hope that you like the changes.  Blogger has a lot of templates to chose from and that is what made the task difficult.  I like this but that looks better and oh what about this.  Paralyzed by choice once again. 

One of the things I took away is referral links.  The YouTube links didn’t do me any good, it was just pure advertisement for those people/channels I find of interest.  It would have been nice to get a link back, a mention in a video or something, but it didn’t happen.  Blogs seem to be going by the wayside.  I still have a list of regular reads in my bookmarks but I don’t visit them that often.  A lot has changed with time.  You have the advent of Social Media and then YouTube and presto people flock to the next big thing.  As for me, blogging does a lot for me and I still get enjoyment from it so I see no reason to stop.  If it becomes a chore then I will rethink my position.

Most of the drama is gone from my life, the ups and downs with my late partner.  Things are leveling off and life is returning to a boredom state.  Still you stop by to take a glimpse into my world, so there is another reason why I enjoy doing this.  My hope is that I will be able to tell you all about the guy I am dating, when that happens and how my life will change once I reach that point.  Until then it’s just business as usual.

I am on the downward spiral with the steroids.  Tomorrow is my last day.  I can feel some of the effects I had before coming back.  Hopefully things will smooth out and there won’t be any problems.  I really hate taking sick time.  It’s boring and nothing gets accomplished. 

Today is the BIG day for the cats.  I get the vacuum cleaner out and it’s claw trimming day.  I guess they will all sleep good tonight.  Let’s just hope the same applies to me and that no one gets injured in the process. 

Did all of the running – breakfast, grocery store and gas station.  Wow such excitement for a Sunday.  Not looking forward to next weekend, the week shouldn’t be bad.  I noticed last week there was a couple of 2am calls but outside of that all was quiet.  I just hope that I luck out and things are quiet.  I hope that every time I am on-call. 

I could use a nice Winter day about now.  A little snow but cold.  I don’t know why but I am ready for Winter.  I made that remark to my mom yesterday and she was caught off guard.  I think it’s more of a Pumpkin and Cold Weather craving rather than just Winter. 

There are 2 big bills that are coming due.  One of which is a credit card and won’t be a problem.  The other is Auto Insurance.  I like to pay it off and be done with it but unless I rob my savings account that won’t be possible.  Putting money aside for savings is easy but then trying to survive without it is another task entirely.  I’ve got about $400 extra a month to play with and that will be my car payment when I am brave or dumb enough to sign up for car payments.  My hope is that my next car payment will be around $250 to $330 a month.  I realize $250 is asking for a lot, even with 0% financing.  Still it never hurts or costs anything to dream. 

Something to look forward to after all is said and done today, I look forward to getting all of these whiskers off my face, washing my hair and just being fresh again.  Then some laughs with John Oliver and sweet dreams with Marvin.  Yeah this is the good stuff!

Off to grab an ice cold bottle of water, finish up the laundry, start the dishes and begin the cleaning and claw trimming.  Wish me luck!

Final thought, I have left my comments open much longer than I anticipated I would.  By this I mean anyone can leave a comment.  All comments are moderated, so only the stuff I chose gets published, which ensures confidentiality.  That said, if there is something you’d like for me to write about or questions you have that I can answer, leave them in the comments.  At some point I will return the comments back to being restricted to members of Blogger, so enjoy this while it lasts. 

Happy Sunday.  I hope that it’s a great day for you and all of those around you.  Now let the fur fly here comes Daddy!

22 August 2015

Will it to Be

I have what I consider to be a strange power.  I can think about someone at work that is a problem caller, think a thought like mom doesn’t have my cell number or anything that seems to be negative or situations that I don’t want to confront.  Boom, they happen.  Case and point … I was thinking that my mom has never asked me what my cell phone number is.  When we met for lunch today she asked me two times.  Both times I told her 911 and she believed me.  I told her it was a joke, don’t call it call my home number and it will ring my cell phone.  That is if I had it setup that way, which I don’t.  If she did have my cell number she would pester me a lot more.

So as you can tell by the last paragraph I met up with mom today.  We went to lunch at Olive Garden.  I got the usual Tour of Italy and Pumpkin Cheesecake (fall special).  Mom had the usual Soup & Salad.  I asked her if she still got the paper, she said no they stopped it a while back.  I told her that one of her past boyfriends passed away.  He was the guy that she thought planted drugs at the house.  Jesus I wish I would have never said a thing about it.  Between that and my Brother wanting to put her in a nursing home and how he is going to get married it was just non stop nonsense babble.  As per usual we passed by one of her doctors offices and she said I go there for therapy.  Yeah I know, she has only told me that each time we pass the place which is twice per trip.  Then she asked me for help with her cell phone.  She forgot her voice mail password so I had to go through the prompts to get that reset and finally I had to add more money to her account.  She does a pre-paid phone with Verizon.  Then it was on to the Cable Remote Control.  It wasn’t paired with the TV but my brother told her not to touch the TV remote.  So she leaves the TV on all the time.  Kind of silly.  So after trying to figure it out on my own, I called the cable company and they walked me through the process.  Presto, all fixed.  I did take a couple of quick naps while resting on the leather couch.  The fun part was trying to get out of the couch, it’s like a trap.  You get comfy and sink in then you play hell trying to get out.  We went outside and played with the dogs for a while.  Then I hit the road.  I spent a couple hours with her total.  She was crying when I left because she was being left alone again.  While I understand her pain, I can only give so much of my time to her  - then I have to go. 

The TV that she fell on, the screen is cracked and they need a new TV.  She asked me about fixing it.  I told her it wasn’t worth it, just recycle it and buy a new one.  TV’s are affordable in the $200 – $300 price range.  It would cost about the same or more to repair what she had.  The LCD is the most expensive part and that is what is damaged.  Since I saw her last, mom has really put on the weight.  She is starting to look like the Nutty Professor when he gets fatter and fatter.  She had this moo-moo of a shirt on and it didn’t do her any favors.  Her goal is to loose 30 pounds by Christmas.  Most of the weight comes from the Mental Health medicine that she is on.  With that you go to one or the other extreme.  In her case she is hungry.  I told her if she wants to loose weight cut out soda, you would be surprised at the amount of weight that causes you to gain or keep on. 

I fueled up the truck and took that down to see mom.  There is a serious issue with the brakes going on.  I had a couple of close calls where I didn’t think I was going to stop.  Then a couple times I felt it as I pushed on the brake like the truck was going sideways.  It’s amazing none of this started until I went to the dealer for an oil change.  It’s like they did something to it.  My choices today were go to lunch with mom or buy a new vehicle.  I chose the cheaper of the two.  The truck will stay parked in the driveway for a while.  Shame it’s got a full tank of gas too.  Everything else with it seems to be okay.  Brakes could be expensive and considering that I just drive it to keep it able to function and not fall apart on me.  It’s not a major worry or problem.  Now if that would be my car, I would be singing another tune.  Not exactly sure what I am going to do about it but I don’t think I will be addressing it anytime soon, then again I could fool myself. 

Working on laundry and sitting in a hot house.  I need to adjust the AC but I am too lazy to get up and do that.  It will be worse when I go upstairs but then I will adjust the AC because the thermostat is upstairs.  I try to keep it slightly warm because the cats love the heat, but I don’t.  In the summer they usually freeze and in the winter they are comfortable 

I’ve been thinking about my long lost love and how much I miss him.  The quirks he had.  Things he used to say and how it was so nice to come home to him.  I’m ready to try that with someone else since I can’t have him back.  I just wish that someone would come into my life.  Going back to the first paragraph of this post.  I have often wondered why I can’t wish for positive things to happen like finding a man or winning the lottery or perhaps both. 

This was clearly not what I had in mind on how I would spend my Saturday, but it wasn’t terribly painful.  I know mom appreciated it and I did it for her.  I also took her up on her offer to pay the bill.  Then I get this speech on the way back to the house about how she is poor.  Wow, I felt bad for a second but that feeling passed.  I am sure when my brother finds out that she spent money today he will hit the ceiling.  He’s got his hands full with trying to manage a girlfriend and mom.  I almost feel sorry for him.  However, given his age it’s time that he grows up.  Mom said that he was thinking about suicide, then she tells me she has been thinking about it.  I was like wow what are the odds that all 3 of us are thinking about the same thing.  I understand my life and my problems.  I understand my mom and her issues.  My brother nah, that doesn’t add up.  He gets to sleep with his girlfriend every night, is only home to eat supper and pack clothes, no doubt he is having sex most every night.  What is there to be sad about, why would you want out of that?  I mean he is after all with the love of his life. 

Ah well.  I got a hairscut and cat food.  Wow what a day.  Tomorrow will be breakfast out, grocery store and prepping for next week, as well as finishing up laundry.  I am working on all of the pet laundry now.  Bad habit, I tend to put everyone and everything else ahead of myself.  That is no good for me but it’s just apart of who I am. 

Now up to adjust the AC and eat some Ice Cream or something that is cold and I guess it would help if I got naked.  That is like the best perk of living alone.  The windows aren’t covered in all parts of the house, but most of the time you will find me either naked or walking around in my underwear.  No one ever sees until, woops oh fuck there is the neighbor.  Yeah that’s happened before but I just wave and run away.  I would get bitched at before now there isn’t anyone to yell at me, despite liking the idea I wish there was someone here to yell at me. 

Cheers to Saturday.  Hope you had fun!

21 August 2015

Fry day

I figured I would continue the tradition and be different by spelling it Fry day.  Yesterday was busy and there wasn’t quite as much catch up work to do as I thought there would be.  I was kept occupied and that help pass the time.  It didn’t help that I woke up in the middle of the night and couldn’t go back to sleep for a couple hours.  I was working on about 6 hours sleep yesterday.  I proved to myself that if you push yourself you can accomplish most anything.  When my head hit the pillow last night at 10p I was out light a light.  Marvin woke me up because he wanted out of the room.  I let him out and it was good night.  The alarm clock woke me this morning and that is a rare event.  I was very nauseated yesterday and after my massage the feeling went away but the closer we got to supper time the feeling came back.  I was perplexed at what to eat.  I looked for Chicken Soup but the one can I have said reduced sodium and that is gross so I went with BBQ.  No problems at all.  I think it was mixing my vitamin with the steroids that caused the issue.  This morning I took the vitamin much later and so far were all good. 

My mom called last night and started telling me about how my brother is going to get married, she is going to a nursing home and the world in general is falling apart around her.  It’s always something with her and she can’t remember that she told you so she tells you fifty times.  Just like when she thought she was going to jail.  It’s the disease more than anything.  She told me that she was lonely.  Then she asked about getting together on Saturday to grab a bite to eat.  Not exactly how I planned to spend my weekend but I will probably give in and we will wind up at The Olive Garden.  I really wanted to get away for a couple hours.  Taking her with me would not be a wise idea, I would be too tempted to push her out of the car as it was moving.  Sort of like a real life throw momma from the train.  She drives me nuts.  I learned that she had yet another fall.  This time she fell on top of the TV.  It’s a flat screen and apparently she did some damage to it.  While she didn’t break any bones, she is sore and bruised.  Then she tells me that the TV isn’t working too good.  Gee I wonder why?  If the Michelin Man fell on top of me, I don’t think I would be working so good either. 

The furry children are all doing okay (knocks on wood).  They still have their sibling rivalry moments.  Mostly it’s over food, if it’s not that then it’s who’s getting attention.  They do keep life interesting.  Marvin and his stomach are at odds again.  I got a pill down him this morning and I have extra laundry to do this weekend.  Poor guy he hates the medicine but he also hates not having it.  He still has the chewing on my fingers obsession.  I bet he would get over that if I loaded my fingers with Siracha.  That would be evil and cruel and I wouldn’t do that to him, but I have thought about it. 

I watched a documentary about the website College Boys Live, it’s on Amazon and part of Prime.  I found it to be interesting but it showed how they live their life on camera.  They are expected to chat every night, be naked for at least the last 30 minutes of the chat time and to either go to school or get a job.  Pretty strict rules but they have no rent to pay, no grocery bills to pay and they live in Florida.  I mean it’s kind of a bitter sweet deal.  I also saw how kids that had family problems were easily attracted to this.  There was drama and fighting in the film.  I don’t like chat rooms or cam sites, they seem to attract trouble.  However, I did browse to the site yesterday and they are still up and running.  That was not a surprise. 

I watched a documentary that I had to pay for about Jason & DeMarco.  They are Gay Christian Singers.  They have some nice music and Jason I think is pretty hot.  I looked them up last night and they are now married with two children.  Still doing tours but unfortunately not coming anywhere close to me.  I wouldn’t mind seeing them, even though I don’t like all of their songs.  They do deliver a good message.  There is plenty of material on You Tube if your interested.  I thought last night I was going to be hearing a song and then found myself in the middle of a sermon, which I wasn’t in the mood to listen to. 

Very thankful for streaming movies and content.  I don’t like to pay for a lot but I do give in if I am truly that interested.  Recently I have discovered that most of the stuff you have to pay for has a trailer, so you can watch the trailer before you buy and know if it’s something you want to get involved with.  That has saved me a lot of money.  I don’t have the tenacity to write Amazon to say I thought the movie sucked and I want my money back.  I am sure they might give in once or twice but outside of that it would get to be old hat quickly. 

Today appears to be what most Friday’s are peaceful, relaxing and calm.  Low stress and easy going.  That is just the calm before Monday gets here.  Then we start the circle all over again.  Until next Friday when things finally settle down.  Support comes in waves, just like life there are peaks and valleys.  You have to enjoy the good and endure the bad. 

One of my co-workers just called me and said that she got screwed at home yesterday.  I was like okay.  No she said you don’t understand I got screwed at home yesterday.  Now I am thinking she is about to tell me all about sex with her husband but no she said that she answered a support call from Dell and they connected to her machine.  Yeah, they planted something on the machine.  She knew it wasn’t real but she went along with it.  Yeah, I told her they will also do the same thing with Microsoft.  Bottom line here is that Dell, Microsoft or any other company won’t call you and tell you that your system has problems or it hacked into their system or whatever lame excuse they use.  Best bet is to just hang up on them or you could tell them you don’t own a computer, that will put them at a loss for words quickly.  Since I know my way around, I would be tempted to run them in circles just to frustrate them in the hopes that they would hang up.  I mean I deal with people that don’t know their way around all day long and I would love to hang up on a bunch of them.  So I am pretty sure my theory would work.  What a way to start a conversation …. I got screwed at home yesterday.  Really?  Do tell.  I was just stunned and at a loss for words, which doesn’t happen too often.

I have found myself more and more interjecting humor into my life into conversations just to be a wise guy.  Then it hit me people who use humor to what I consider excess are often in a lot of pain.  Which I am in some pain but it’s better to laugh than to cry.  I don’t want to open up to everyone but there is some pain it’s mostly the lack of companionship.  I’d love to tell the highlights of my story but I’d be fooling myself if I thought that everyone cared to hear it.  You would get the perfunctory I am sorry response and people would move on.  That’s like the other day someone asked me how I was doing and I started to tell them, they stopped me and said they really didn’t care they were just being polite in asking.  Don’t ask a question if you don’t want an answer.  I mean that is the whole part of asking a question, to seek information or to gather knowledge.  Duh!

Amazon has notified me that Big Boy’s pee pads are at the post office ready for pickup.  How exciting, I get to pick up a package tomorrow.  There is probably a note in my box that says see clerk.  I wonder who this c. clerk person is, I walk in and ask for him or her but they are never there.  See what I mean about humor.  At least I am not asking for Seymour Butts or Willie Fister or the list goes on and on. 

Have a great weekend!

19 August 2015

One More Day

I was able to pill myself to sleep last night.  It was an okay night of sleeping but it did have a couple interruptions.  When I woke up this morning I still wasn’t quite feeling it.  Rather than getting sick, this almost feels like a bad allergy attack.  In any case I fed the cats, sent my obligatory emails, re-recorded my voice mail greeting, took my pills and gave Big Boy his pill, then I was back in bed.  As much as I did want to return today I felt the extra day would help.  When I woke up I was a sneezing mess and my nose was all itchy.  I opted to start on Prednisone, it’s a quick fix for the major symptoms.  The side effects that I will have to endure will be dizziness, hot flashes and peeing all of the water away in my body.  The other side effect will be that I will want to eat much more.  It’s only a short 6 day course, then life will return to normal. 

I isolated myself again today no phones, no computer no nothing but TV.  I saw the Single Moms Club.  That was the best thing that I watched all day long.  There were lots of other movies but they were dumb.  Last night I took in Defying Gravity for a mere $2.99 and it wasn’t until I started watching it that I realized I had already seen it.  That’s the problem with Gay Themed Movies there just aren’t a ton of them to pick from.  Now if your looking at gay porn well there is plenty to chose from.  However, I like to watch movies that have gay themes to them – it’s just more normal for me.  I am also big into Stand Up Comedy but there isn’t a lot to chose from there either. 

Thankfully tonight it’s Wednesday so that means that Suits will be on.  I always look forward to that show and this weeks episode is sure to be a doozy from the trailers that I have seen.  Also after that is Mr. Robot which is getting interesting.  Both are on USA and I think they are also streamed after the fact on USA’s website, but don’t hold me to that. 

When I did finally open up technology I got some great news.  One of my many favorite porn stars is going to bottom for the first time.  I’m talking about Will Braun.  Photo below is none other than him. 


For the first time in at least a year or more I was able to see Lawn Boy today.  Man he still has the figure going on but you can see that his face shows his age.  I looked at him but went back to my movie quickly – it wasn’t like I wanted to sit and watch his every move like in the old days.  He’s straight and I’ve got no chance with that, so keep it moving.

I will be going back tomorrow and the shit is stacking up for me.  While others can take phone calls no one can fix the physical things in my office that require an on site tech.  So that means my day should be interesting.  The massage therapist will be in as well.  I am hitting up the ATM in the morning and hopefully I will be able to get some time with her either tomorrow or on Friday.  If not well so be it.  Can’t say that I didn’t try. 

Short rest of the week and then I will have to enjoy my last free weekend, as next weekend I will be on call.  That is when it starts to rain.  Now, I looked at last weekend and Saturday & Sunday were very busy.  I will be keeping an eye on this weekend as well.  But it only gives you an idea of what to expect.  It’s not until your actually on-call that you know what your in for.  Everyone is telling me that I won’t be able to leave the house.  Yeah maybe on Saturday but on Sunday I will be at Steak N Shake and driving to the grocery store.  I mean a guy has to eat!

All of the time at home has of course caused me to lament on how I am all alone and what I have been through.  While I am stronger in some ways I am still vulnerable.  2 years seems like a long time but it’s a very short period of time.  While the dating world hasn’t exactly been kind to me, I hope that I can meet someone who will be able to rock my world both in and out of bed.  I realize that what I dream for may mean that I have to meet multiple people but I would just as soon skip that and go straight to the end.  I know that is not how it works, but I wish that it did. 

The children have loved me being home.  Momma and Gator have taken full advantage of me.  Big Boy even wrapped his around my leg.  They are still doing the meow choir and they have enjoyed lunch again.  It’s more expensive for me to stay home than go to work where they are concerned.  At least my gas tank won’t require a lot of fuel this Friday.  I do plan to get out of the area on the weekend and who knows maybe I will actually make it to the movies.  I just hope that I can have some fun this weekend.

I hope all is well in your world.  Take care and we shall talk again soon. 

18 August 2015

No Place Like Elhomo

The rest of yesterday played out okay.  I had a decent meal and spent time with the children.  Called it a nigh early, I just became so overly tired that I had to go to bed.  I knew that it wouldn’t bode well for me.  Usually when that happens I wake up in the middle of the night and am up for hours on end, until I get back to sleep.  I did wake up during the night but I was quickly back to sleep.

When I awoke this morning I didn’t feel well at all.  My neck was killing me and my throat felt raw.  I pressed on to Breakfast and then quickly realized there was no point in going any further.  I was staying home for the day.  There was a lot planned for today and I really didn’t want to miss it, but my body told me it was time to rest.  So after sending out the obligatory emails to inform the masses that I would be resting at home, I promptly turned my computer off.  Forwarded my home phone to voice mail and turned off my mobile phone.  A day of peace & quiet it was.  That is until Gator started in.  Then Bear and soon we had a cat choir singing the song of you don’t pay me enough attention and I want some now.  They wrote that song too. 

I slept a good part of the day away with not one but two naps.  I watched movies on Amazon kind of interesting.  I started with The Odd Couple, very interesting movie.  Then it was on to Saturday night at the baths a movie from 1975 and I could easily tell where the plot was going.  Yes this was a gay movie.  Then I saw the remake of the Beverly Hillbillies.  That was awesome and a whole lot of fun. 

Supper came early for the cats and for me as well.  Now they are begging me for treats and I really don’t want to give in for a bit.  I know that I threw off their routine for the day. 

The best part is between movies some sales person rang the door bell and Ruth started growling because she got woken up and thought that we had a visitor.  That just tickled me little Ruth thinking that she could take on the world.  Mighty Cat.  I’m here to tell you that if the world would have poked her, the world would have been in for a hell of a fight. 

By afternoon I had removed the forward on the phone, turned the mobile phone on and sifted through my small amount of email.  I have trouble lurking for me tomorrow.  Got a machine that sounds like it’s failing.  That won’t be fun at all.  My plans are to return tomorrow provided my body says it’s okay.  My worry now is that I won’t be able to sleep tonight.  So I have to take some extra sleeping pills and pray that they do the trick.

Yesterday I finally heard back from the complaint letter I sent to the mortgage company about the homeowners fiasco.  They somehow don’t think they did anything wrong and aren’t convinced despite a notice of cancellation that the policy would have lapsed.  I am going to respond but am waiting.  The longer I can stew and think the better the response.  I can clearly see they won’t be giving me anything for the time that I wasted in policing this.  I shouldn’t have to babysit and I while I will do some checking next year I don’t plan on jumping through hoops like I did this year.  Then again I hope that we don’t have a repeat performance. 

Nothing terribly exciting going on just a semi sick dude who is slightly lonely.  It’s time like this that I realize there is no one around to help me, if I don’t do it then it doesn’t get done.  What I would have liked most today is someone to make me a bowl of chicken soup.  I hate being the one left behind.  If my throat is bothering me that will bring me to my knees every time.  It did as a child and well I am just a bigger and older child now.  This could have waited to happen for a couple months.  However, stress has many side effects. 

Time for some more TV and I think an ice cold bottle of water.  Sounds good to me.  Then again I could just as soon have ice cream and then the water.  Here’s hoping for a better tomorrow and that I can get back to work before the place goes to hell in a hand basket. 

17 August 2015

No Motivation Monday

From the time I woke up I have just wanted to go back to bed.  I forced myself to come to work and now I feel like I should be rewarded and get the rest of the afternoon off.  Shame it doesn’t work like that.  I’ve had some difficult calls but as I suspected it’s calm compared to the past Mondays we have dealt with.  I am surprised that we will be done with the large migration project next week.  They are already planning celebrations with cup cakes and ice cream.  Woop! I won’t turn it down even though for my health I should. 

Looking forward to having my Fettuccini with Chicken from Maggianos for supper tonight.  After that a nice relaxing evening would be nice, but who knows what the cards have in store for me.  Good news or something good would be nice.  That is all just your typical Monday for me.  Looking more forward to Friday.  I looked this morning and I could easily schedule the rest of the week off and use up my time but I don’t think it’s worth that. 

Hopefully your Monday is going well.  At least the sun is out here so I guess that is something to be thankful for.  Talk with you all again soon. 

16 August 2015

The Weekend

Friday evening, I started the repairs on my car.

Saturday the big day was finally here.  I went to what was my last therapy session, or so I think.  My therapist is no longer able to meet with me on Saturday and given that my life is no longer in a shambles and all I have to work with is everyday problems, it’s probably better that we part ways.  I still can’t believe how well things have turned out. 

I worked on the car after therapy and sad to say but it turned out like shit.  I am not pleased with the results and it’s totally my fault.  The more I touch it the worse it gets so I am leaving it be.  I know that if I take it to a body shop they could fix it with very little effort but it would cost me a minor fortune.  Still thinking about trading but I am tending to hold off on that because of the commitment to car payments.  Ugh!

I met my friend that I haven’t seen in 15 years.  Holy cow he changed.  Got fat, hair color changed and facial features changed.  He walked right past me and I didn’t even know it was him.  We took time to catch up but I knew as soon as I saw him that things weren’t going to work out in the romance department, so I didn’t bother to even go down that road.  We talked about our mutual friend that neither of us has heard from in years.  Apparently he had an affair and that is why his marriage ended.  Doesn’t sound like him at all.  My friend wasn’t focused much on lunch, it was awkward so he played with his phone most of the time.  He was making plans for after lunch with other friends and as soon as he finished his food, presto he was out the door.  Fine I get it, it was awkward for me as well. 

Met my other friends for dinner and they picked up the bill.  That was kind of expected but I still kept my order with in reason and didn’t take full advantage of the situation like they did when I was paying the bill.  Now that my friend is back to work he is back eating high off the hog.  Hell if I was making $80 plus dollars an hour I would eat out every night and high off the hog as well. 

Sunday the usual laundry, grocery shopping and filling of the gas tank.  I am winding down slowly and preparing for yet another Monday that I won’t like.  My boss is on vacation and there was no weekend work, so I am anticipating a quiet Monday, we shall see if that comes true.

I read an article about iCloud not protecting all of your photos and that it was best to back them up with Google Drive or Microsoft's One Drive.  So I have uploaded all of my photos in the cloud as an extra layer of protection.  I think iCloud will get your photos back but I would rather have a duplicate set just in case.  There are photos that can’t be replaced and I need to know they are safe.  It has taken two days but they are all up their floating around. 

I also enabled multifactor authentication via Google’s Authenticator for my cloud account and did the same for my Last Pass account.  I was using Toopher but I liked the Google idea it seems more on track with an RSA PIN Token.  Authenticator generates a pin # and it expires like once every minute.  When you need the # to authenticate, just launch the app and presto there you go.  I am working on encrypting my cloud storage but I think that may take some time.  I also took some time out of my day to clean up my documents folder, which had gotten way out of control.  I was keeping a lot of things that I really didn’t need anymore. 

Nothing terribly exciting, just an average weekend that was a little busier than normal.  I have no idea what I will be doing next weekend but it will be my last weekend before I go on call for a week.  Not looking forward to that but it’s a job requirement.  At least it’s only a week and I will be done until November. 

I have come to the conclusion that I am long overdue for a vacation.  I need to book something that is low cost and that will get me out of here for a few days.  Will I do that?  Probably not.  My vacation bank is building at work and I am happy about that.  However, a lot of the days or time that I want is already spoken for.  I will save it for a rainy day or when I need to take the car in or if I ever give up and make that podiatrist appointment. 

Looking forward to watching Last Week Tonight with John Oliver, he always puts an interesting take on the past weeks events.  Funny guy!

I leave you with the song Overloaded by Life of Dillon.  Every time I hear this song I can’t help but thinking about a loaded baked potato.  That is not what the song is about though.  Hope you had fun this weekend.

14 August 2015

Laptop upgraded

I got the word yesterday that Windows 10 was ready for my laptop.  So instead of blogging I chose to upgrade.  It was pretty much an all day process.  It was done by lunch time.  Then I had to go through all of the prompts and configure it the way I wanted it to be.  Had some issues with Internet Exploder and between work and working on this there really wasn’t time to blog.  All is well now and both of my machines are on Windows 10 Pro.  I’m happy so long as they keep on working fine.  My desktop icons on my laptop didn’t get rearranged like they did on my desktop.  Must have something to do with multi monitor mode. 

I was talking with a couple of the guys from work yesterday.  We got to talking about the dress code.  One guy said that he would like to work naked.  I didn’t react and he thought that would get a rise out of me.  Nope.  The other guy said no one here wants to see me naked.  With out missing a beat I looked at him and said oh that’s not true.  Yeah he had no idea that I was talking about myself.  From as best as I can tell he appears to have a nice body so I wouldn’t mind seeing it but I didn’t clarify my response, I just let it go.  I am not all about a naked dress code there are some people here that I am thankful that they wear clothes.  Woof!  It was an interesting conversation to say the least.  Never thought the conversation would go there. 

Last night I got a phone call from the friend that I was supposed to dine with last weekend and they want to get together this weekend.  So I have 2 meals out planned for tomorrow.  1st catching up with my friend who I think is gay and seeing where that goes, this is lunch.  Then for supper the 2nd meet up at Maggiano’s for pasta.  Yeah I am going to be eating good tomorrow and I suspect very full.  It will be nice to do something different with my Saturday and get out in the world.

In other news gasoline prices here are on the rise.  There was some issue at a refinery and it was going to take 2 weeks for the hike to be in place, but I read the story yesterday and on the way home I saw the prices jumping already.  Not a good weekend for traveling but I will manage.  I wanted to fill up the truck before the hike was in place, but doesn’t look like that will happen.  Poor wallet.  It will be empty like the gas tank. 

I will be working on the scratch this weekend as well.  I need to start tonight because you have to let the clear coat setup for 24 hours before you can move to the next step in the process.  I don’t know that I will give it 24 hours but then again I might.  I like to take shortcuts and tend to stray away from following directions for personal projects because I am time poor and want everything done now.  So that I can move on to the next thing.  There are only so many hours in a day. 

I’ve got a new song that I love right now.  It’s Scotty Dynamo’s mix up on Bad Blood.  He did an awesome job and I really like it a lot.  The YouTube video got pulled for copyright issues but he’s done plenty of mash ups like this before without any problem.  I just don’t get it.  Anyway there is another way to watch and I will hopefully be able to post a link at the end of this video.  Give it a listen and you too might be hooked. 

So my day tomorrow will start out with Therapy.  Not sure but this might be my last session.  That kind of depends mostly upon my therapists schedule.  If she no longer has Saturday’s free well then I will call it.  If she does then I will stick around for a session or two longer.  I remember when I walked in the door.  My life was spinning out of control.  Lost partner, Mortgage Company that wouldn’t work with me, Lost my job, Worried about the future and all of the fighting I was doing with my partner’s affairs.  Look at me now, my life for the most part is normal.  I have processed my partners death but still have my moments, the mortgage is now in my name and I have a decent job making a good living.  It’s like a life makeover but I made it happen – no one gave me a damn thing.  That is something I am immensely proud of.  While it’s nice to have handouts, especially when the chips are down they just never seem to be there for me.  Everything I have in this world I had to fight for and I suspect that will be the case for the remainder of my life. 

Yesterday I saw a posting from Shane Bitney Crone where he said it took him 4 years but he took a big step yesterday and changed his relationship status on Facebook to Single.  He lost his partner Tom Bridegroom 4 years ago.  While I understand the challenge and pain associated with the task, I didn’t have to go through that.  I have always been listed as single because we wanted to keep our relationship a secret.  I can however tell you that while Shane is younger than me and his relationship lasted shorter than mine, his pain has to be equally as great as what I have experienced.  Earlier this week I took an opportunity to soak my foot and had to hang up the extra towel in what used to be my partners bathroom.  I walked in hung it up and then walked out and started staring at his bed.  I saw his CPAP machine, his cane left in the exact place where he put it and the glass that he took his last drink of water from.  I just can’t move those things.  It sounds like it would be simple.  Just looking at it took me back in time and I just reflected on the immense pain that I still feel to this day of my loss.  I know his health wasn’t the best but I would love to have him back and I miss him and his cooking so very much.  I have worked hard to suppress the pain in order to be able to function in every day life.  I wonder if it will diminish with time or if it will be as strong as it is today and never ease up.  Only time will tell.  We all grieve differently.  Shane said that some people have told him that he is damaged goods and that guys won’t want to be with him.  I never thought of myself as damaged good and but I do think that I will have a hard time finding a boyfriend simply because of my age and my figure.  Shane on the other hand has youth and a great figure – so I totally disagree with it.  I don’t think that his experience of losing his partner through no fault of his own makes him damaged goods.  I think that it will cause him to cherish his next relationship even more than he did the first and to live each day like it’s his last.  Thus he will get more out of the next relationship than he did the first simple because of what he has been through.  I think the same is true for me and anyone else that has walked in our shoes.  Words just don’t do any justice to explain the intense hurt and agony you feel.  This isn’t a gay thing it’s a human thing and it applies to anyone who has lost a spouse gay, straight or otherwise.  I think animals have the same feeling.  I wish that we only knew pleasure and that there was no pain, sadness or anger - - the world would be a much better place.  Just think about it for a second. 

All of the cat kids are doing well.  Bear wanted to sleep with me last night so I drug him in my room.  Lazy Bear.  Marvin left as soon as he entered the room.  Suddenly life was all about drinking and scrounging for food.  He was in one of his moods and there is no changing that at the time.  You have to wait a few hours and then he will come crawling back.  I woke up in the middle of the night and that is exactly what happened.  Ah boys. 

So it’s back to school time of the year.  I have noticed an increase in traffic this week and have decided to continue to get a jump on things and wake up a little bit earlier.  So it’s like construction that was going on never ended.  Usually I wake up before the alarm or cats go off but not always.  Mostly the cats wake up before me and let me know it’s time to roll my lazy ass out of bed and serve them.  I hate mornings but they are so much nicer on the weekend when you realize, oh I can rollover and go back to bed.  The cats don’t like that but I sure do. 

Enjoy your weekend and have fun.  I am going to try to do the same, while acomplishing my usual set of chores.  What a challenge!

I couldn’t get the video to embed but here’s a link ….. https://vimeo.com/136233238

12 August 2015

Wild Wednesday

Here we are again in the middle of the week.  All is calm, no issues at the moment.  Had a little bit of a traffic headache this morning but nothing that I couldn’t handle.  Children are purring along just fine.  Talked with a new guy that started here last week, turns out he has 5 cats too and they sound like they are all family.  Very interesting!

Talked with a co-worker friend of mine, sound like she is on the way out.  She is in her 2nd position here and not happy.  There seems to be a problem everywhere so goes in this place but it was called to her attention that she might be the problem and that offended her.  She has had different issues with the two positions she has had.  Right now she is dealing with verbal abuse and yeah I’d say that she isn’t directly the problem here but by complaining about it that puts her in the spotlight. She also has a tendency to get easily offended at things that wouldn’t bother me she thinks that someone is talking badly to her or in a negative tone.  Honestly it would be better for everyone involved if she was able to move on.  She thinks that they are going to fire her but she hasn’t been in any trouble, people actually like her and the work that she produces.  So I don’t think that will happen.  Anything is possible and I don’t want to be in the middle but I am.  To make matters worse we were both spotted coming out of an empty office this morning and it was by the wrong person.  Ever hear of guilt by association?  Yeah I think that might rub off on me. 

The day is flying by, lots to do today.  Which is a good thing but I am ready to go home.  Need to get my car’s itch, I mean scratch fixed and see the children.  I think I slept with a mosquito last night.  Fun Fact – only the female mosquitoes bite. 

Well that’s all I got, talk with you again soon.  Be well!

11 August 2015

Itchy Car

Late yesterday afternoon, we had a water main break.  Somehow we had water in the building but the AC system didn’t have water and was shutdown.  Thankfully this happened during working hours, so I was able to react and get the proper people notified and put fans in place.  I prayed the phone wouldn’t ring at night and it did not.  So I was leaving and had to pass by the water main break.  That is when I found out I had an itchy car.  Yeah I scratched it on a construction sign.  I was not too happy about it but what can you do?  I didn’t see how bad things were until I got to the post office and it looked horrible.  So I went home and got out my touch up paint kit.  I was all set to paint it and something just told me, don’t do it.  I put on some primer and getting that off helped fade the scratch some.  I ordered a scratch repair kit that has a clear coat pen in it.  That should take care of the problem from the research that I have done.  The kit will be here tomorrow so fingers crossed.  I am not a handy man when it comes to mechanical or auto body, but I do what I can.  I am glad that I didn’t pain it because I would be married to that and changing it would have required a professional.  It’s events like this that make me think I should start driving the bucket of bolts (aka the truck) to work, so if it gets scratched, hit or whatever it wouldn’t matter so much.  However, I am comfortable in my car so that is what I drive.  Still thinking about getting a new one but then I would be married to car payments and that wouldn’t be any fun.

Since I spent a lot of time with my car issue, my evening didn’t have a whole lot of activity.  I surfed the web for a quick minute and logged in my mortgage bill.  Then it was upstairs to play on my phone and sit with the children.  I decided to call it an early evening and retired to my room.  I got some good sleeping done last night.  Woke up at 4a and had to let Marvin in and those next two hours flew by but they were enjoyable sleeping hours.  I have also thought about getting a new mattress.  There is a company on-line called Casper that will ship a mattress they made to your door.  It’s vacuum packed in a box so when you open the box the mattress comes to life.  They offer a huge trial period and give you a 10 year warranty.  However, a twin costs $500 that seems a bit pricy to me.  Besides that I like to try before I buy and not have to worry about return shipping.  Anyway looking at their website must have jolted my subconscious into action.  I hope sleep tonight is just as enjoyable.  I’d really like a temper-pedic bed but those are up there in price as well.  I have laid on one in a store and got up after I saw the price.

One of the hot studs I work with came by my desk to tell me about a job opening that was much closer to home.  It would be with County Government and he was certain I was more than qualified.  I looked and sure enough I am.  It would be closer to home, less stress, no on-call and a huge pay cut.  It would be a union position but common sense already tells me that I couldn’t survive on the measly wage they are paying.  I am very well taken care of here when it comes to money and I couldn’t see leaving what I see as a sure thing to get the benefits of being in a union, less stress and no on-call.  I am glad that he thought of me but it’s just not practical.  Plus the hot stud that turned me on to this opportunity could be a setup.  He’s got a big mouth and if you tell him something in the morning by noon everyone knows.  Oh yeah one more perk, the hours would be much better and I would be able to get up later and come home way sooner.  Plus I could go home for lunch if I wanted.  Too bad they don’t pay more because I would love the opportunity. 

So I am by myself today in the office, the other two tech people I work with are out today.  Hello to leaving early.  Might not be by much but I will be early.  Always seize that opportunity when it’s presented, because it happens very rarely.  It is a fairly calm day here and hopefully I didn’t just jinx myself.  The afternoon will be long and boring, what else is new.  Better to be bored and paid than to be bored. 

That is all I know at the moment.  Really wishing that I had a time machine, even thought I know life is all about moving forward.  There are still moments I would like to go back to and re-live for obvious reasons.  I hope all is going well for you and that life is treating you well.  Take care and I shall talk with you again.

10 August 2015


My day started with one problem after another, I finally have been able to come up for air.  Phew!  Made it in early and been going ever since I got here.  The cute guy that I gave the gift card to that got food poisoning is back.  It was Subway that did it to him.  He’s eaten at this particular Subway before but as he was eating the sandwich he started to not feel good.  I would have stopped the meal but I think he kept on going.  In any case I felt really bad.  I told him the cookies were fine.  Glad he is back but you can tell by looking at him that he has been through the mill.  Not a fun way to spend the weekend, hopefully it’s all up hill from here for him.  No good deed goes unpunished. 

I finally got confirmation from my friend that our meeting is on for Saturday.  A little nervous but I think it will be a good time and there isn’t anything to worry about. 

Gator was all over met yesterday, sleeping on top of me – following me around – telling me she was hungry.  I know she loves me and longs to be next to me.  I woke up and she had her head tilted and her ear was resting on my chest, she was out like a light.  Minutes before I was telling her no daddy needs his sleep.  She isn’t one that gives up easily but when she finally does give up, I am much happier.

We had some serious storms roll in last night.  Just like last Sunday the phones were going nuts and the weather radio went off twice.  Woke up this morning and everything is just fine.  Rain is in the forecast for today but the rest of the week looks to be dry.  Wet roads mean slower commutes and more accidents.

Made it through the grocery store yesterday and I have maybe $20 in my primary checking account.  I picked up Pumpkin Ice Cream among other things.  Wow I had some last night and it’s damn good.  I think I will be finishing it off tonight.  I got more Fit Kitchen Dinners which were on sale for $3 each.  Not a bad deal at all.  I tried to skimp here and there but I was at the upscale store so as much as you try to cut back they are more expensive to start with.  I was smart and got my soda on Saturday at Target, it was on sale and I am stocked for a while. 

Just killing time until Lunch time rolls around here in a little bit.  I’ve got a nice deli sandwich to sink my choppers into and very much looking forward to it.  We have a staff meeting on Wednesday and that won’t be a whole lot of fun but I will play along.  I didn’t have to do my morning phone shift because I was so busy.  Would be nice to get out of the afternoon shift as well but I don’t think that will happen.  As long as all I get are simple calls I can deal with it.   We have a payday coming at the end of the week, which is a very good thing or I would have to charge my groceries and I really hate to do that. 

No Windows 10 upgrade for my laptop just yet.  I thought perhaps that once I installed it at home it would jog things along and the laptop would be telling me it was ready to install.  No such luck yet.  It will be nice to have both machines on the same platform.  No telling how long I will have to wait but waiting is my only choice at this point.  No issues just yet with my home pc, Windows 10 Pro is running just fine.

I made my twitter private yesterday.  I really wanted to start following a couple porn stars that I am fans of and didn’t want that out in the open for the world to see.  There is just something about big brother at work finding out that creeps me out.  Plus you never know when I will run for President or God forbid have to look for another job.  Just as soon keep my private life, private as possible.  I know there isn’t a whole lot of privacy there but every little bit helps.

Happy Monday and I will talk with you later. 

08 August 2015


I got my lazy Saturday.  I slept in, got up around 8:30a and fed the children thanks to Gator and her incessant meowing and clawing at the bedroom door.  Then I had breakfast and watched a movie on Netflix.  Then it was time for a nap.

After the nap, woke up and had a late lunch.  Fed the children again.  Then laid down on the couch and watched some TV.  Fell asleep and woke up a couple hours later. 

Got dressed and went out to start my day at 4pm.  Better late than never.  Got the mail which brought me the latest copy of Out Magazine.  Then on to Target to pick up cat litter and treats.  Then out to eat where I saw a very buff looking blond hair blue eyed guy.  He was just what the doctor ordered.  I didn’t have the balls to approach him, so I ate my meal and stared periodically.  He looked at me a couple times.  That was some fine looking eye candy. 

Then it was on to the cat food store.  Where I saw 2 of the guys I like working side by side.  When I was headed up to the front to check out there was only 1 guy.  He was bent over and oh my that was some sweet view.  I can’t help it – the heart wants what the heart wants. 

Now I am back home where I have started laundry.  My weekend plans fell apart.  My friend that I was supposed to go out to eat with had to work, so I got the entire day to myself.  I did put the phones on DO NOT DISTURB and as you can see slept most of the day away.  It felt good but my feet are still killing me. 

I will be here until morning when I will be headed out for breakfast and grocery shopping.  Then filling my car with gasoline and coming home to wrap things up and prep for another fun filled week.  I sure hope that this coming week is nothing like last week!

Take care and we shall talk again soon. 

My Windows 10 Experience

My desktop has officially been upgraded to Windows 10 Pro.  I started the download process and waited.  I had a couple of pop ups to deal with in answering questions – like that I understand Media Center has been removed from Windows and that’s it’s okay to proceed.  I also had to tell the software that I wanted to install now instead of scheduling the install.  Then the machine rebooted and I got this circle on the screen where it was installing.  That is the point where I called it a night and went to bed.  That looked like it would take hours to complete. 

I came back to my machine this afternoon and had to still answer a couple of questions.  I didn’t go with Express Settings, I went through and set everything the way I wanted it.  If you use the Express Settings there are some serious privacy concerns (check out Google for more info).  Then my machine loaded up the new OS.

It seemed to have rendered my machine useless for a few minutes.  I was ready to dump it and go back to 8.1.  However, a little patience pays off and things came to life.  It appeared that it didn’t see my 2nd monitor, which didn’t make me happy.  I started researching that and then all of a sudden I had a 2nd screen.  My MS Money didn’t work said that it needed IE 6 in order to run.  I found a registry hack on-line that took care of it.  Money works just fine now.  Very thankful for that.  I really don’t want to have to abandon that program it does a great job helping me track my finances.  I know there are better solutions on line but I like what I like. 

Next I moved to the desktop and had to re-arrange all of my icons.  Then I lost my slideshow wallpaper of guys.  I had to set that back up.  Then the task bar.  They added in a few extra features that I didn’t like so I had to turn them off.  I prefer the classic windows look.  Got things changed to my liking. 

Windows Update is no longer in the Control Panel.  It’s been relocated to the Settings menu.  I ran it and had a couple of updates to download.  I know that Microsoft is working on a Service Pack for v10 to address some of the privacy concerns that should be out according to the chatter I hear by the end of the month. 

Honestly while I appreciate the free software I don’t quite see what all of the fuss is about.  I am presently working on defragging my C drive.  There is a bunch of stuff left behind in the registry and I have gotten that all cleaned out.

Finally the new Edge browser, well there are more security concerns with it.  I am still using Internet Exploder  Explorer V11.  Honestly I really like IE so switching away from it won’t be something that I do unless it’s a mandated switch.  I am sure with sometime it will be phased out, but until then I like it and will keep using it. 

Should I or Shouldn’t I upgrade?  If your getting the software for free like most people I would say YES upgrade it’s free and there is no reason to pass that up.  If you have to pay for it, well then that is up to you.  If I had to pay for it I wouldn’t have upgraded.

I did have to purchase some new software and install updated versions of other programs.  Overall at this point I am pleased.  If you do upgrade have patience and if something doesn’t work, remember your best friend is Google, you can find fixes there. 

Happy Computing!

07 August 2015

Week from hell

All sorts of crazy problems coming across my desk plus lots of interaction with the boss this week.  I am spent emotionally and mentally.  I’ve only spent a brief amount of time in front of my pc at home – mostly to check mail and do some quick surfing.  Then it’s been upstairs to watch TV and spend time with the furry family. 

I am eager for 2 days of rest and very much looking forward to it.  So much that I am ready to say I am ill and go home.  I’m not doing that just yet but if things get too crazy for me I will call it a day quickly.  I would rather have the sense of accomplishment that comes from not giving up, even though I want to.

I had to send a follow up message to bug my friend into meeting up.  It worked but now I can’t get him to confirm what I suggested.  I hate it when people don’t respond.  I know that everyone has a life but if your going to make plans with someone, at least have the common sense  to follow up and confirm.  I am still doubtful that we will actually meet up.  He also said that any place that was close to my house would be fine.  Why exactly is that?  Did you plan on coming back to my house and have me fuck your brains out?  That’s what I am starting to think.  Like I am playing with fire and this was a HUGE mistake.  I hope that I am proved wrong.

My usual dining pals called and we are going to try to get together this weekend.  They want to go to Maggiano’s our usual place.  I tried to get them to change to a new place but nothing doing, they want the original.  So I have reservations right now, I should be getting a call to confirm tonight or early tomorrow.  I was there last weekend eating and I have no objection to going back, I may order something else though. 

The lady I gave the AC to decided to surprise me and she paid for 1/2 of my massage yesterday.  It was the strangest thing I gave the lady my money and then she started making change with me.  I was like what in the hell are you doing?  She said if you have questions go talk with and then I knew what happened.  Nice surprise and if I knew that someone was paying for 1/2 of it I would have gone that much longer. 

There was a crisis while I was getting my massage and doing all of the follow up kept me very busy yesterday afternoon.  Long story short I have one pissed off user.  A vendor that should have called prior to showing up didn’t and showing up out of the blue here will always cause problems.  I mean you need to see if people are going to be available, what if I was out of the office?  Still it’s all my fault and whatever.  You got mad now you have to get glad again.  I covered my bases but felt like I had to throw myself under the bus in order to do that.  I never like writing my boss with issues, but she enjoys being well informed.  I feel like all the events of the week have caused me to be placed under the microscope and I am a little nervous.  I just did something that I know is prohibited and I broke policy which could get me in to hot water but I had to get the remote user working again.  It’s off the radar so unless you go looking no one will know what I have done.  If I get caught it won’t be pretty.  Keeping my fingers crossed.

Oh the cute guy that I have the major crush on here at work that is straight and married.  Yeah well I gave him a subway gift card.  He went yesterday and brought me back a couple cookies.  That was nice.  Now I hear he is very sick and had to go home yesterday.  He thinks it was food poisoning.  It’s like no good deed goes unpunished.  I feel bad but if he asked for Jared’s secret sauce on his sandwich that isn’t my fault.  His manager thinks that it’s funny but I do not, I feel bad.  Of course I don’t know that it was Subway that did him in, it could have been something he had for breakfast.  I ate the cookies last night and I am fine.  They were extra sweet as usual for a freshly made cookie and they were bad for me but I haven’t had a bad reaction from them. 

Windows 10 has finally made it’s self available to me on my home PC.  I got clearance from my postage provider, they say their software works fine with Windows 10 so I will be upgrading over the weekend.  Wish me luck and I hope I don’t regret my decision.  I really want it on my laptop first but they apparently push it machine by machine and not account by account.  I thought that once it was available on one machine it would be available on all of them, since I use the same Windows Account to login with.  Not so. 

I’ve done some clean up work here at the office.  Been staring at cardboard boxes for months on end and finally decided to get rid of them.  Now if the place that we donated some monitors to would come pick them up I would have even more room in the storage area.  I am sick to death of looking at them but I am not pushing the issue.

Just got an update on my chair.  Apparently the check hasn’t been cut yet so the timer to wait for my chair hasn’t started.  I should have another update next week.  I thought something was wrong when it was implied that payment had been made.  Companies don’t just give up money overnight, they drag it out through some long approval process, then you have to get on the check cutting schedule as most places only pay bills one time per week.  So I could be waiting for quite sometime for this chair.  I hope that isn’t the case. 

Right now all that matters to me is when I get to leave today.  So anxious for the end of the day and start of the weekend.  I just want to sleep and be lazy for a little bit, not having to think about anything or anyone.  That to me is the best part it’s like letting my hair down as if I could do that, my hair is so short.  Still you get the idea.  Tension, Stress and Chaos is it any wonder that I have several large knots in my back? 

Here’s to a good weekend for all.  Talk with you peeps again soon. 

05 August 2015

Sail Away

I’d like to sail away.  Yesterday afternoon I got a call from my boss and it’s wasn’t a happy conversation.  Ever since then I have been depressed.  It took the wind out of my sail.  The gist of the call was that I closed a ticket because the user asked me to, we found a workaround.  That isn’t acceptable we aren’t in the workaround business, we are in the business of finding solutions.  The conversation just didn’t set well with me at all, plus she said that she was disappointed in me.  That is what had the biggest impact on me.  I feel like I failed when I know I didn’t.  While it’s important to find a solution to the problem, it’s also important to cater to your end users wishes.  It’s like you have 2 bosses and they are each telling you to do something different.  You can only please one of them but yet you still try to please both.  Holy cow. 

I was thinking of having Fajita’s but opted for Corn Dogs instead.  They were really good and I had a Blueberry Muffin for desert.  Then the more I thought about the events of the day I had to have ice cream so I got some Vanilla Bean out, pretty good.  Too bad it went straight to my hips. 

All is well in the cat kingdom, they still have me stepping and fetching for them, catering to every whim and desire. Well short and sweet today.  Hope all is well in your world.

04 August 2015

Terrific Tuesday

I polished off the remaining 1/2 of the box of Cinnamon Toast Crunch.  It was a hard job but someone had to do it.  Very tasty but I know I didn’t do my body any favors, despite my taste buds being very happy.  Tomorrow it will be Cinnamon Chex or Special K Red Berry, still have to decide. 

Got a surprise on the way home part of the construction is done so we are back to 3 lanes for a larger part of the commute.  We still have to funnel down to 2 lanes at a certain point but my hope is that will be done with very soon.  It would be nice to see it today because rain is in the forecast for the remainder of the week and construction and traffic don’t mix well together.  I was surprised at how quickly I was home. 

Finished off the leftovers from Maggiano’s.  Opened up the mail and got the notice for the PO BOX rent.  It went up again.  I am tempted to change boxes to make the price go down but that means that I would have to change stamps, stationary, update my mailing address with lots of places, get my drivers license changed it’s just far too much work, so I complain but I pay the money in the end it is just easier.  Auto Insurance will be coming due as well.  I know that I’ve talked about going to 1 vehicle but jumping back into car payments doesn’t thrill me, it’s bad enough to have a mortgage.  I know I will be in debt for the rest of my life but I its also important to have some financial breathing room. 

My therapy appointment got cancelled for this weekend.  The therapist had something come up.  Fine by me.  Just means that I have more time to myself.  The guy I asked about catching up has received my message but has yet to respond.  I suspect that he was just being kind and humoring me when I initially hit him up.  He probably thought that I wouldn’t follow through and hit him back up.  If this is truly the case then it would have just been easier for him to say no and save us both the energy.  While I am going to give him ample time to respond, my anticipation at this point is that he won’t respond.  If my assumption is correct, it makes me want to block him.  I mean you say your a friend but when push comes to shove, your no where to be found.  Yeah I am a little ticked by this but it is better to know who your real friends are, even if it does hurt.

Last night I had to stay away from the computer, I was literally sick of technology in general.  I had some ice cream and watched TV with the children for the bulk of the evening.  Everyone was happy.  Then it came time for bed and well you know the routine.  Here I am but at least we are on the down hill slide, which is always a good thing. 

I had a bit of a crisis this morning.  I replaced a ladies laptop battery because she has hit me up a couple time for a charger and had told me that her battery isn’t holding much of a charge.  So I thought I would do her a favor, plus it was kind of my job.  Anyway the next thing I know her machine needed a bit locker recovery key.  I obtained that and then each time she would reboot her machine required the same recovery key.  They are not short either but at least they are all numbers.  So I had to figure out the problem.  Turns out that when I replaced the battery it turned off the TPM which is required to be on for bit locker.  I got that turned back on by sheer luck – the average tech would have just imaged another machine.  It was really kicking my ass but once I figured out the root of the issue it was easy to fix.  Turn the TPM back on and then tell bit locker to resume encryption and viola all is well.  I went back after a couple hours just to double check.  It’s that extra effort that people really notice and appreciate.  The last guy that was here didn’t do things like that, he was simply a fix it person.  While that is part of what the job requires I strive to make sure that everyone is happy or reasonably happy  I have to work with these people everyday, so yes I give them extra attention and special treatment that I would not otherwise provide in an average phone call, but if your in my office I’ve got your back, regardless if I like you or not.  As a result of my going the extra mile people express good things to my boss and they continue to pay me!  So it’s a win win for everyone. 

Wow 15 more minutes then it will be back to the phones.  We have a pharmacy and a clinic (doc in the box) here on site.  I had a co-worker just take me over to show me where they are at.  I found out that I can get prescriptions filled cheaper here than at a retail pharmacy, good to know.  I will be giving that a try soon and am anxious to see how much I can actually save.  If its a decent amount then it will be worth the switch. 

The children are all doing well.  I have new photos of them up in my cube and have invited some people over to take a look.  You can actually see how big Bear really is, so people have more appreciation for when I say I have a large cat.  They know now that I am not joking.  Good thing for me that he is a gentle giant instead of a mean bastard like his little sister is when it comes to claw trimming time or sharing her food. 

Well that’s all for now folks.  Back to the old bump and grind.  I shall talk with you peeps later.