30 June 2015

Treat Yourself Tuesday

Today was my travel day.  I realized over 1/2 way into the trip that I forgot to bring a USB Cable.  Thankfully Dell included a USB Extension cable that got me out of my jam.  We have new monitors and with that comes new sound bars. The old ones had a special plug on the bottom of the monitor.  The new ones require USB but they only give you a short cord.  I had been setting the USB extension cords aside and just hooking up a USB cable to the monitor.  There are USB ports on the side which, so it’s pretty slick.  In this case I used the extension cord and didn’t have to mess with the monitor, way to get me out of a jam. 

The office it’s self that I went to is very small.  A total of 2 people work there and a 3rd person starts tomorrow.  I was very surprised that no one asked me if I wanted to go to lunch.  I thought that was rude and inconsiderate.  That’s okay, I treated myself.

The work was done and I was left all alone by lunch time.  The whole place shuts down between 12:30 and 1:30 in the afternoon.  The door locks and that’s just how they do business.  I’d love to work out of this office, it’s far removed from the politics of the office I am in or the politics of our headquarters.   However, to drive 2 hours 1 way to work would be a bit excessive.  Nice for the once and a while trip but I just couldn’t do that every day, let alone the wear and tear on my car. 

So I treated myself for lunch.  I was 30 miles away from the pie place.  I just went there.  Had a Ruben with Coleslaw and a piece of Peanut Pie.  It was topped with Peanuts, a layer of Peanut Butter, a smaller layer of Chocolate and a Graham Cracker Crust.  Very good!  It wasn’t my Celebration Pie, which is no longer sold but it was good.  I hope they bring back Celebration Pie.  It was the first Pie that was part Cake that I have ever had.  Just so awesome. 

My work day ended at 3p when I finally got home.  I was very tired.  All I wanted was a nap.  Then I got a phone call from AT&T they of course told me that they couldn’t help me with my voice mail problem.  They offered one type of service with Uverse and that was it.  So my choices are keep what I have or go back to a Plain Old Telephone Service (POTS) Line.  I’m keeping what I have.  I presently have an account with You Mail which is an awesome voice mail service.  It reads caller id and greets your caller by name.  So for example.  Hi Sally, Jeremy isn’t available right now, please leave a message.  I get transcripts on my phone and it even alerts me to missed calls.  They have built in spam protection so if you get a robo call they block it.  Pretty cool.  I’ve got a business account and it’s $10 a month, but I got a coupon so it’s $9.00 a month.  If I keep it I can pay for a year of service instead of doing the month to month thing and then it’s even cheaper.  The only thing they don’t do that the phone company does is light up the red light on the phone when I have a message.  It’s either you check your cell phone for messages or login from a PC or call to check in.  I am big on only one voice mailbox so that is why I pay for the business account, it allows me to forward my home phone and my cell phone so no matter who calls all of the messages are in 1 mailbox.  The best part is they give you 30 days to try it, if you cancel they refund your money no questions asked.  You can do other things like setup specific greetings for specific callers (based on their phone number) so you could tell Aunt Fred to go to the store and get some bread before she comes over and if Uncle Joanne calls you can tell her that your unavailable.  She will have no idea that Aunt Fred is coming over.  Kind of slick.  They offer a free account which will support 1 phone number, so if you wanted to try it you can.  It’s a scaled back account and isn’t feature rich.  You can keep a free account for life (or as long as they stay in business).  I believe they serve the US & Canada only at this time.  Visit them at youmail.com if your so inclined.  This is not a sponsored post and I don’t get anything from them, just passing on what I feel is a good service.  Now I am debating do I pay them or go back to Uverse.  I mean I’m paying for both when you think about it. 

Last night on the way home I hit a bump and I think I have knocked one of my tires out of balance.  I had some issues today but perhaps it’s just the way the new tires are.  I am going to drive it for a couple more days and if I still think there is a problem then I will stop in to ye old tire shop and ask them to check my rubbers for problems.  I almost did that today but successfully talked myself out of doing it.  Hopefully, I won’t be sorry.  I figure if there is a problem it will need to be addressed this week. 

Wowzers my phone was blowing up today with email from work.  That is nothing new and you really notice it when your away from work.  Speaking of which I found a HUGE problem with my PTO.  I took two days but the system doesn’t know how to divide so it was charging me for 4 days.  I talked with HR and got that fixed, I had them fix my time off for the concert next month as well.  Now I have a nice healthy PTO balance like I thought I should have.  I found out that I haven’t been the first person to be bitten by that.  Maybe someday they will fix that bug.  Until then I will be extra careful.

I saw something that resonated with me today on Facebook.

People wait

all week for friday,

all year for summer,

all life for happiness

That is so very true.  I am probably at the most unhappiest point of my life.  I realize that it’s my job to make sure that I am happy.  The difficult part is figuring out how to make myself happy.  I keep putting things off and waiting for the other shoe to drop.  I’ve been doing that for 2 years now.  I have to stop it, move on and live my life.  Saying it is one thing, putting it into action is another.  I am going to message the guy that I think is gay and a friend of mine to see if he wants to grab a bit to eat and catch up.  Nothing ventured, nothing gained.  I don’t have to be forthright with my motive and if something doesn’t feel right we can just be friends.  It’s been years since we have seen each other.  I am interested to see where this goes.  Hopefully he has come to terms with whatever his sexuality is and hopefully he is still hot.  Time will tell.

Back to the old bump and grind tomorrow.  Then hopefully a partial day on Thursday and we can slide on in to the holiday weekend.  Talk with you all later.  Take care and be well.  Be happy too!


29 June 2015

2 Hell in a hand basket

By the title you can tell what kind of day I am having.  It’s not good!  First, someone got ransom ware on their PC.  They were told to never power the machine back up and not to ever put it on the network.  Someone tried to do me a favor and image a new machine but they didn’t test the PC and the image didn’t complete correctly.  So I have had to reimage it twice now.  I am hopeful that the 2nd time for me is the charm.

I am traveling tomorrow.  It’s 2 hours up and 2 hours back.  An easy days work.  The hard part is trying to figure out if I need any kind of security clearance to get items out of the building.  No one knows, but we take stuff out all the time.  They referred the matter to our HR department.  They are 5 hours away and work in a different environment.  So how are they supposed to know?  I’ve got lots of stuff to put in my car so all I can say is look out I’m coming through.

There was a surprise presentation this morning but I took care of that with no problems.  Found out that a co-worker was in a car accident on the way to work this morning.  She’s okay but had to be checked out.  I don’t have any other details and probably won’t get them until Wednesday.

This week should be a quick one.  With a day of travel and the holiday it’s like I am only working 3 days, just like last week.  I just hope when next Monday rolls around things are a little bit calmer.  My 2 co-workers that are in IT will both be out on vacation next week.  That means that I can leave early if I so chose and no one will be the wiser. 

I should have known coming back from a couple days off would be a struggle because Marvin crapped in my room last night.  The he made me get out of bed and let him out.  It was in my path of walking but some how I managed to avoid it like the plague.  Easy clean up.  I left the house early and arrived with some decent time to spare.  It’s been down hill ever since. 

The left side of my nose is trying to form a pimple and it’s sore.  I can’t believe I am in my 40’s and still have to deal with acne.  It never ends.  Thankfully my battle was not nearly as bad as my brothers.  I would do all sorts of crazy things with my acne.  One time I popped one with a pair of pliers, it hurt like hell but that’s it no fuss.  He could pop one and 7 more would show up.  He had it really bad.  Everyone said I would have scarring and I don’t have any.  His face is a different story, he has all of the acne scars.  However, he had the higher metabolism so he has always been thin.  I’d like to trade now and get his metabolism, I will keep my present completion. 

Well time to go back to the fun and hopefully get this laptop done so that I can go home on time tonight.  Tomorrow will be a short day.  4 hours on the road and it will probably take me an hour or two tops while I am there.  I have no plans to come in to the office afterward, it will just be the perk of having to travel.  Plus they will pay for my mileage, which will be very nice.  I get a meal allowance as well but I don’t know if I will use that.  Mileage is much more important to me.  Got to help pay for those expensive rubbers I just bought. 

Have a good day, talk with you all again soon.

28 June 2015

Last day of R&R

Gator woke me up way too early, but I needed to get started with my day.  If it were up to me I would have spent much more time in bed.  Fortunately between her meows, cries and the pressure from my bladder…. she won. 

I got the tail gate to open on the truck this morning.  However, when I needed it most, at the grocery store it wouldn’t open.  I guess it had gotten too hot outside.  Where is fall when you need it? 

Made it through Breakfast at Steak N Shake.  I have this regular waitress that takes care of me.  She knows my eating habits pretty well.  She is always there with a Diet Soda for me.  She asked about Chili this morning.  I said yeah to a bowl.  Ordered a Royale Double minus mayo w/fries.  She had been doing so well for so long.  Every time I ordered my ticket would ring up with an even amount.  This went on for months.  Then one day she remarked about it and ever since then no matter what I order I can’t get it to come up even.  This morning I gave her trouble and she told me that I needed to order something else.  So I got a Nutella Shake.  Still no luck.  The shake was good though, despite the fact that I didn’t need it. 

Yesterday in combing through my Facebook feed I see that one of the hot guys I used to admire at the local ice cream stand got married.  He looked really happy, which is nice.  Color me green with envy. 

I’ve spent the majority of the day here in the house with the kids.  In fact they want more of my time so after blogging it will be upstairs for the rest of the evening. 

Ruth really worked me over at supper time.  I had to eat with one hand and pet & scratch her with the other.  She doesn’t stay in one spot for too long, just in case your plotting something.  It’s like she knows.  I wasn’t plotting anything but trying to eat my Pizza.  She loves to bother me when I am at the table, regardless of what meal it is.  Breakfast is usually the preferred meal.  I cater to her because that is as close of a relationship that I have with her.  It’s her cuddle time, but she doesn’t cuddle.  I do manage to get her motor running, which makes me feel good because I am doing my job very well. 

Big Boy had an accident overnight and it wasn’t on the pads.  Messy clean up for me.  He got a paper towel bath, which he lapped up.  I don’t see how he can possibly get so dirty but like all kids he manages.  He just craves the attention and of course I give in.  Maybe not right away but I do give in. 

Got a call from my friend that has been looking for a job.  Sounds like he fell into one.  He has a meet & greet on Tuesday with the new place.  Then he starts officially next week.  I hope he doesn’t fuck it up.  Pay is really sweet, $40 per hour.  I don’t think he will get benefits but he is going to ask.  That can’t hurt. 6 months right to hire.  So as long as he can put up with the demands of the job for 6 months they will make him perm.  I hope that it all works out to his advantage.  I am a little jealous because some of what he will be doing, I have prior experience doing.  However, over 1/2 of his job is networking and that I have very little experience in.  Would be nice if I did.  As comfortable as I am with my job I am getting anxious for a change. 

Speaking of my job and change.  I will be on the road this week, but only for 1 day.  I need to visit an office that is about 3 hours away.  It’s up and back same day.  Shouldn’t take me very long when I get up there.  I need to setup a new person.  Take a physical inventory with a bar code gun.  Then if there is time grab lunch.  Then back home.  Probably will be Tuesday.  Wednesday the new person starts.  Thursday we should get to go home early and Friday is a holiday.  So if all goes well tomorrow will probably be my most difficult day.  Because I am getting back from 2 days off.  I had 151 emails to comb through.  It was rather easy.  There were some that required action, but I’m not working for free so that shit can wait until tomorrow.  I think there could be some major issues from what I read but again it’s a job for tomorrow.

I did my research and if my calculations are correct, minus the 2 days that I am taking next month for the concert.  I will still have 9 days left before I am totally out of time.  Not bad.  For years 1 to 5 we get 19 days, plus 2 floating holidays.  Not bad at all.  Now that is vacation and sick time lumped together.  Run out of time and need to take time, that is when you will have problems.  9 days has to last until Dec 31.  Then on Jan we start over again.  Feels like life is already passing me by. 

Okay so speaking of passing me by.  My evening will be doing that.  I am watching the last ever episode of Nurse Jackie.  Not looking forward to the show ending.  However, I understand all good things must come to an end.  I will drowned my sorrows in ice cream, the sugar high will cause me to get sleepy and thus bedtime will begin.  To help it along a double dose of sleeping pills and presto … Good Night!  Talk with you peeps later.

27 June 2015

Recapping Saturday

I had problems getting sleepy last night, imagine that.  I watched Whiplash and Miles Teller really gave a good performance.  He’s cute & hot but his acting was totally amazing.  This is a movie you shouldn’t miss, unless of course you hate jazz or instrumental music.  After that I watched Alec Mappa Baby Daddy and I wanted to laugh but didn’t.  It was still a good time and I learned all about how Alec Mappa & his partner adopted a baby!  Very touching and appropriate given yesterday’s SCOTUS ruling.   It was like 3 am before I called it a night.  Momma would wake up and play and then go back to sleep.  She kept me on my toes, as any momma would do. 

I woke up this morning and I knew it would be a huge problem.  Still I forced myself out of bed.  Children Fed.  Pride Shirt on, grabbed ye old glasses and headed out the door with my lab order.  Stopped by the eye doctor first to get the glasses adjusted.  Turns out when my hair is shorter they bite or dig.  I think they are okay now, time will tell.  Then on to the hospital. 

I walked in and expected to take a number.  Nope that system is outdated and gone.  Turns out they have a Secure Registration Kiosk.  It’s nothing more than a glorified iPad.  You tap on the screen to enter in your information.  Then your phone number is put up on a screen.  It’s masked so Imagine your number is (312) 555-1212 you would see (312)-XXX-1212 and when they get ready to help you a tone goes off and the monitor changes to say NOW SERVING and your phone # displays.  It tells you where to go.  Then you sit down and they scan your index finger on your right hand.  Then you get to verify all of your information, provide them with the order and your id and insurance.  Presto registration is complete.  Then you have to sign the forms and your officially registered. 

I waited about 15 minutes and someone came to get me.  It was a black man, who was dressed in a shirt & tie.  I didn’t expect he would draw my blood but in fact he did.  I told him which arm and to use a butterfly needle.  First stick and I was bleeding.  It was amazing and a wonderful experience despite the little prick. 

On to Cracker Barrel for Breakfast.  Time to raise the Blood Sugar to an unhealthy level.  I got Strawberry & Crème French Toast.  It was very good and sweet.  The server who brought me my food commented on my shirt and asked me if it was a pride shirt and if it had to do with Marriage Equality.  I proudly said yes.  Too bad the server was a female.  That would have been a great time to make a move.

Picked up the mail and then on for some shopping.  First the auto parts store for fuel injector cleaner.  Grabbed what I wanted and waited 5 minutes staff were passing me by after looking at me in the face.  I don’t know if it was the pride shirt or if they thought I was a new statue.  In any case I put my items on the counter and walked out.  I won’t ever be back in that store again.  Their customer service sucks and this time it was an all time low.

Moving on to Target.  I find that 1/2 of the parking lot is ripped up and there is yellow tape everywhere.  What to do?  I made my way through it and parked on the side of the store.  In for just a couple things and out in a flash.  Then on to Sam’s Club.  Filled up the Tank in the truck.  Then went into the store and picked up way more than I planned on.  Had to break out the credit card.  Got a really good buy on XL Ink for my printer.  $42 for color (yellow, magenta and cyan) normally a regular set that includes a black cartridge is $60 and that’s all standard ink.  I’ve got 2 black XL’s here so made sense to purchase color.  Grabbed more paper as well.  Then got the kids some Fancy Feast.  Soda, Paper Towels, Kleenex, Batteries and before I knew it was staring a bill of $140 in the face.  Still I feel like I got some good bargains.  I just hate that you have to purchase so much.  If I had a family then I could see it. 

I played Tailgate Roulette.  See the truck has 1/2 glass and a tailgate.  It only opens when it feels like it.  If the time isn’t right then of course it won’t open.  I had some luck 3 weeks ago.  Ever since then when I come out with a lot of items the gate doesn’t want to open and it makes me look like I am trying to break in.  I’ve tried oiling the latch but nothing doing, it doesn’t help.  I actually have better luck in cold weather.  This has been an on going theme for 2 years now.  So I have to load stuff in the back seats.  Their also isn’t a child escape latch in the back, so I can’t open it from the inside.  I’m sure you were thinking that and it was a good thought.  I can do that with my car but not the Truck. 

Home to unload all of the crap.  Then I decided to take a nap.  For shame.  I was hot and tired, what else was I to do.  I slept for a couple hours.  Then hit the road.  Drove to another auto parts store, got the cleaner I wanted and got back on the road.  Drove to the buffet.  I ate very well.  Had lots of Bread Pudding and that didn’t help my sugar levels, which are sky high. 

I wanted to stop and see a movie since I was in the area of the bargain theatre but I would have had a serious wait on my hands.  Decided to come on home.  Fed the children.  Logged the receipts and figured out how much poorer I am.  Started laundry.  Here we are. 

I really wanted to clean out the truck and promised myself I would do it once I got home but well that was the last thing on my mind.  So I said what I always say.  I will do it tomorrow.  Eventually tomorrow comes.  Instead of seeing the movie Get Hard for cheap I am going to probably give in and purchase it on Amazon.  It’s not like I want to own it but I want to see it, that is the only option they offer at the present time. 

Oh my friend finally called me last night as well.  I got to hear all about graduation.  Guess what they did in fact go out to eat afterwards.  Just like I knew they would.  However, the selfish sob wanted it to be his day.  I heard excuses about photographs so apparently he doesn’t even want anyone else to see him in his uniform.  Wow what a piece of work.  I still hope someone shoots him for being such a prick.  He cost me 2 days of PTO and got my hopes up.  Not that I couldn’t have cancelled my plans and worked, because I could have.  However, the good thing is that I had advance notice after I figured out that I was lied to.  Better to know early than to not know at all. 

I need a shower, so I am going to go take care of that.  I need to clean litter boxes and pass out evening treats.  Then I think I will be watching TV and relaxing for the rest of the evening.  That is after I am done with my surfing adventures. 

More rain in the forecast for tomorrow, so it will be breakfast & grocery store.  Then I will be home for the rest of the day.  Unless I just get an overwhelming itch to venture out, which I highly doubt.  The kids like it when I am home and hate it when I leave.  I got yelled at this afternoon because I left again.  So 1 more day and then it will be back to work, which I am not looking forward to.  Still haven’t checked my voice or email messages but I will be doing that tomorrow.  Just to see if there is anything special to watch out for.  Besides that I need to turn work mail back on my phone before a problem arises. 

I hope your weekend is going well and that it’s all sunshine & roses in your world.  Take care and I will talk with you again soon. 

26 June 2015

Day 2 of 2– Vacation

Today was a little less expensive than yesterday, but I still managed to spend money.

The truck got it’s service.  The upsell was the Fuel Filter.  $100.42 total with the oil change.  Not terrible but a little more than I wanted to spend.  Funny thing is it’s been 3 years since it’s been in for service.  They said back then he had a massive oil leak and they needed to remove the engine in order to replace some seals.  Today they told me everything was fine, nothing major found.  Now all I did was take it to an Instant Oil Change place a few times.  I think what they saw back then was the Power Steering which had a massive leak and they fixed and I paid for.  This was while he was still alive.  So all set in the vehicle department.

I realized that my extended warranty probably covered that belt tensioner part.  Turns out I was right.  I got to call in and now have $93 coming back to me.  Better than nothing. 

Made it to therapy.  It was a little bit of an emotional session.  My therapist is encouraging me to let my fears go and step outside my comfort zone and go looking for a man.  At the very least go to pride over the weekend.

Picked up momma’s prescription.  Fetched the mail.  Got my ears lowered and my shirt soaked (no extra charge for the shirt soaking).  Came home took a nap.  Woke up a few hours later.  Did my battle with AT&T, waiting for results.  I had to file a complaint with the Office of the President.  Then I went to the local place I hit up last weekend.  Bacon Wrapped Meatloaf was calling my name.  Got a much larger portion of meatloaf.  Less potatoes.  Had Chocolate Crème Brule for desert.  Left once again feeling like a beached whale, but at least I was able to smile about it. 

On to pick up pussy cat food and hit up Lowe’s for Water Softener Salt.  It’s been 2 years since I last filled up the softener.  Normally with the 2 of us it would be about every 6 months.  Salt is cheap.  2 40 pound bags for $8.48.

I’ve accomplished most everything that I wanted to do, with the exception of having fun.  It would be so much better to have fun with someone, rather than having fun alone.  By fun I don’t mean sex.  I mean going to the movies, going shopping or simply getting away.  I could jump in the car and head to a motel and treat myself to a Jacuzzi and a night away from home, while it sounds nice it would be a complete waste of money for me.  Then I could stop in and have some Pie for breakfast.  I do want to get away and will probably hit up the buffet tomorrow, at least it’s in my plans. 

Oh best news for last.  I checked on the Bankruptcy case before I started this post.  The Trustee has entered a motion and they do not oppose the hardship discharge.  That means that I am much more likely to get it.  The Court looks more favorable at the recommendation of the Trustee.  I don’t know yet if creditors will file any objections but I am certainly more optimistic now than I was yesterday.  Had I known this information yesterday I very may well have purchased a new car.

I am sure that unless you were hiding under a rock that you know that SOCTUS has ruled in Marriage Equality and same sex marriage is legal in all 50 States.  That’s very good news, now all I have to do is find a man to marry. 

Cheers to the weekend!  2 more days of resting to prepare myself to go back to work on Monday.  Not looking forward to that but it seems like it’s a million miles away right now.  I know it will be here pretty fast.  Enjoy your weekend and I am sure there will be at least one if not two more updates before Monday.  Talk with you all again soon!

25 June 2015

Day 1 of 2–Vacation

The theme for today is expensive!

I was sleep deprived because Momma woke me up in the middle of the night when she decided to declare war on a toy and started playing.  I wasn’t happy, it was 3am and I was sleeping really good.  I got up to use the bathroom and then kicked her out of my room.  I was left with Gator & Marv.  I closed the door and was able to sleep for a few more hours, which felt like minutes.  My brain started to engage and I was thinking about work and this and that, it was just hard to turn it off. 

So I’m up eating breakfast feeding the children and getting ready to leave for the car dealer.  I arrived at the dealership and began the long wait.  I swear today was Upsell Thursday.  Everyone in the waiting room had something they ‘found’ wrong with their car.  A battery here, a leaking hose there.  For me it was a Belt Tensioner.  Turns out this little part has been loose and that is what made my car sound like I was driving a bus rather than a car.  They had to special order the part and I waited while it was shipped in from a nearby source.  Then I got the damage total  - wow!  $274 oil change, tire rotation, belt tensioner.  Then they dropped the bomb and told me that I needed new tires but could wait until the next oil change.  Panic set in.  I knew this was coming but didn’t expect it now.  They marked 2 of the tires RED meaning they needed immediate attention. 

On the drive home, I stopped at the post office to fetch the mail.  Got my window repair kit.  I made the repair but don’t have a lot of confidence in it.  I was thinking about throwing caution to the wind and just buying a new vehicle, it would be so much simpler and I wouldn’t have to worry about tires.  Then reality set in and I realized I’d have a car payment that I was committed to.  The car has served me well and knock wood hopefully it will continue. 

I was supposed to return with what used to be my partners vehicle but since I had the unexpected repair and the extra wait, I couldn’t take being held hostage like that again.  So I opted for tomorrow.  That gave me time to review finances, grab lunch for me and the kids and squeeze in a power nap. 

Made it to the doctor’s office.  Saw a speed trap on the way over so I took my sweet time when I was going home, wouldn’t you know it the trap was all gone.  My appointment was at2pm I was 20 minutes early.  The doctor was a little over a half hour late.  Held hostage again. 

On the way home I drove to the tire shop.  It was about 3:30 then and they said an hour to an hour and a half.  It was 6:30 when they got me out of there.  While I was a little ticked they gave me the alignment for 1/2 off.  I saw a guy take off with my car.  I told the cashier jokingly that someone stole my car.  He got even with me by telling me that the guy was hungry and was going to get all of us food.  I guess he was puzzled at my reaction.  I just had the look on my face ARE YOU FUCKING KIDING ME.  Yeah he was.  He spoke up quickly before I had a chance to react.  It was just a road test to make sure that everything was quiet.  In addition to the 1/2 price alignment, I got $40 off and a mail in rebate for $60 which I was able to submit electronically – so I saved the cost of a stamp & envelope.  Nice!  That was $504

I stopped for gas as well but that was a drop in the bucket with all of the other money I had spent today.  I am ready for the poor house.  Seriously, I’ve got the money in savings not sure if I will part with it when the bill comes but I will get the bill paid somehow.  I just hate disturbing my savings. 

I wanted to go out to eat for supper but talked myself out of it because there are storms moving into the area and I just wanted to get home to the children.  Tomorrow I might go out. 

All in all not a bad day.  Just went by quickly with all of the waiting and driving.  Tomorrow will be a little better. 

I’ve got the other vehicle appointment early.  Then therapy and then I am free.  I want to get my ears lowered, need to pick up momma’s medicine and have some fun.  Not exactly sure what have fun means at this point but hopefully I am successful at that.

Saturday I will have my blood drawn, which won’t be any fun at all.  My doc suggested that I see a podiatrist for my continuing foot problem.  He tested me for neuropathy but turned up negative.  He thinks that it’s not gout but were checking my uric acid levels anyway.  I mean he put it in my chart that I have gout but told me to my face that I don’t have it.  So I am puzzled.  The pain is manageable which means that I will delay the podiatrist but will make it there eventually.  I am seriously concerned that I won’t have enough PTO to make it through the rest of the year.  I need to figure that out quickly.

I did find out weeks ago that we have a doc in the box on site at the office.  It’s totally 100% free and there is a mini Walgreens setup next door so you can get your medicine and be on your way.  The drugs you have to pay for but the doctor which is actually a nurse practionier is free.  That is pretty sweet – I guess the idea is sick or not come to work, you can always go home. 

Tuesday morning I got the scare of my life.  I always leave the house with a cold soda in hand when I am headed to work.  I walked towards the front door and popped the top on the soda.  The burglar alarm went off.  The glass break sensor picked up the pop and thought it was glass breaking (which has a very distinct sounds) and the alarm went off.  My hand started shaking and soda went everywhere.  I was frozen for a minute and then reacted by turning the alarm off.  I needed to leave and try to be early that day but it didn’t happen.  I had to wait to see if I was going to get a call or if I cancelled the alarm in time.  Sure enough cancelled in time.  Now riddle me this why will a soda trip the glass break detector but I can be watching a movie with the alarm set and glass breaks on TV and nothing happens here.  I’ve turned up the sound on purpose but still nothing.  Makes no sense to me.  I guess it’s nice to know the alarm works.  Not exactly the way I wanted to start the morning but I got through it okay.

Yesterday I found out that I could add Corbin Fisher to my ROKU Player.  I was seriously excited about this.  Now I can watch streaming porn in my living room or in my bedroom.  That makes for a much better environment and a little more enjoyment. 

Nothing new in the Bankruptcy Department.  I check every day just to make sure no objections have been filed.  I am so eager to see how this ends.  I hope it’s favorable to me regardless of the result.  At least I will be away from the crazy loon bankruptcy attorney and that will be a very good thing. 

It’s well past my normal time of passing out treats, so I guess I should go before the children start to panic and I have a riot of meows and cats following me around.  Here’s to tomorrow and having some fun!  Hopefully, it will be a far less expensive day.

Happy Friday eve or Happy Friday – depending upon when your reading this.  Take care and I will talk with you all again soon.  Be well.

24 June 2015

Busy Day

I am once again dealing with a bunch of things and have a very busy day.  I have a meeting to attend and that will chop off an hour of my afternoon but will put me on the phones afterwards.  I’ve got a new hire that starts on 7/1 and I am racing against the clock to try to get everything in place.  She is in a remote office and it looks like I am going to have to make a visit out there.  I am trying not to but I don’t know that I can put it off. 

So last night for supper I had 1 frozen Steak N Shake Frisco Melt.  They have a strange package.  You put the whole thing in the microwave, no venting.  It self vents and cooks the burger.  The bread is like eating shoe leather and they lather on the Frisco Sauce.  It’s close to fresh made but I prefer the real thing.  Then I had Mostokioli which was okay.  They went great together. 

Tonight is going to be Mexican food.  The Season Premier of Suits is on so you have to know I will be watching that.  I really love that show and Patrick J. Adams who plays Mike is the main reason why I watch the show.  Sexy is the quickest way to convey why.

Speaking of Sexy.  There is this guy in the office and I’ve noticed him more and more.  He is just uber smoking hot.  Of course he is married and plays for the opposite team.  However, I get vibes from him that he might be into messing around.  Perhaps it’s all in my head or just wishful thinking but man.  When my brother called on Monday I didn’t have any time for self pleasure.  I woke up Tuesday morning and this guy was all I could think about.  My sex drive is tame compared to what it was when I was younger.  Desperation is starting to creep in a little bit and I’d love to tempt fate and throw caution to the wind but this could ruin my job or at the very least make it uncomfortable.  I normally wouldn’t chase after a married guy but there is just something about him that says please F me now.  I heard that his wife is pretty controlling and she doesn’t allow him to have friends.  I think he may just be desperate to make a friend and maybe there isn’t anything sexual there.  I’d love to ask him to lunch but I don’t know if I could behave myself and/or what we would talk about.  Our interaction is usually all business but when we get even mildly personal in conversation there are awkward long pauses and he smiles a lot.  He has an excellent smile.  I wish I could find a guy that had his physical attributes.  It just feels good to tell you my story.

So my friend’s son will graduate and become a state trooper on Friday.  I had scheduled Thursday & Friday off in the hopes of going but of course that got nixed because of the lie.  Well she sent me a text message on Sunday to say happy father’s day.  I haven’t heard from her by phone since we spoke on Monday.  While it’s not that uncommon I would have thought she would have called me by now.  I am starting to doubt if our friendship is still in tact.  I suppose the real test will be on Friday if she calls or sends photos.  I looked ahead to view my PTO and after this week I will have 3.3 hours.  It has to build back up because I am taking 2 days next month to see Charlie Puth.  I’ve still got my 2 floating holidays but I like to keep those in reserve just in case of an emergency.  My understanding here is that if you take time and don’t have it, that is when it’s a huge problem.  So long as you have time, no one cares how you take it.  I believe I am running out of time, but I could be wrong. 

On the cat front, Marvin still thinks that my fingers are chew toys.  He has hurt me but still no breaking the skin.  I am wondering if he needs a bone to chew on.  I know he’s a cat but it’s like he is teething.  Bear has decided to start using the litter box for pee.  He goes to his bed and does #2 there.  I still have pads out but he hasn’t used them for a couple days.  I will need to wash his bed and that won’t be fun because it’s loaded with fur.  Everyone lays in it at some point.  Thankfully everyone is doing well and making it okay. 

Yesterday on the way home I noticed a crack in my windshield.  It’s in the strangest place.  At the top of the window.  I remember last week a rock or something flew through the freeway and it hit the top of my car.  I kept looking for body damage but there isn’t any.  Just glass damage.  The crack is small enough that I can fix it myself.  I ordered a kit from Amazon last night because I am lazy like that.  It will be in on Thursday so I can spend Friday fixing the windshield.  Fun!  The dealer looks for damage to the windshield, so I am kind of interested to see if they find it tomorrow.  My guess is they won’t.  The light has to hit the car just right and you have to be looking at the top of the window – otherwise you will never see it.  Yesterday was just one of a couple days of sunshine.  I never saw it in the gloomy rainy weather. 

I saw a video on FB last night of a woman who was handcuffed and hobbled (legs attached to the handcuffs) steal a police car, crash it and try to get the cops rifle out.  They had to break the windshield with a baton and tase her before she was successful.  The car she stole I would say is a total loss.  She was in the back seat and this occurred in AR on Saturday.  Just when you think the prisoner is secure they break out.

Last night I watched The Cobbler with Adam Sandler via Netflix.  Wow great movie.  I didn’t want to go to sleep afterwards but I had to.  It wasn’t slapstick funny but it had some laughs in it.  There were more serious undertones. 

Finally in checking the Bankruptcy case, all appears well at the moment.  No objections filed as of today.  The deadline for objections is set for 07-23 and my deadline for dismissal for non payment is 07-27.  So it will be very close.  Let’s hope there isn’t any objections and that we don’t incur any judicial delay so it’s discharged days before it would otherwise be dismissed.  Either way no matter what happens were done as of next month.  I would rather walk away knowing that no one is coming after me for certain rather than taking a chance and having a fight on my hands.  I am so tired of fighting that I need to rest and then have a very long vacation.  Hopefully paradise will be mine soon!

Speaking of fighting when the bankruptcy lawyer called the other day his message was 2 minutes long and then he just faded away.  I found out that AT&T sets a time limit for UVERSE customers of 2 minutes.  I’ve spoken with Customer Service.  They claim they can’t extend it.  However UVERSE voice mail is the same thing as Unified Messaging, it’s just you have a smaller mailbox and have less control.  I’d pay to switch back to unified messaging.  I will be investigating if that is possible on Friday.  Sounds like I just found my next fight.  I’m sure this will end with me writing a letter because communicating with first level people who are programmed to just get rid of you is such a challenge.  Nothing ventured, nothing gained. 

Now it’s time to setup for the meeting and see how much I can get done in a half hour before the meeting starts.  Joy!  Have a great day.

23 June 2015

The Beat Goes On

Last night in the mail I received a note from the Trustee’s Office in regards to my late partners Bankruptcy.  They want a copy of his Income Tax Return for 2014 and also any refund that he received above $750.00 goes to them.  If I don’t comply within 30 days they will dismiss the case.  I chuckled when I read this.  The level of incompetence that I am dealing with both on the part of the Attorney and the Trustee is unbelievable.  Hello he’s dead and there won’t be any tax return forthcoming.  When there is no income then there is no reason to file a tax return.  I realize that it was a form letter and it was sent by a minion in his office but still it’s kind of important to know if the debtor is dead or alive.  Doh!

So I just checked the status of the case and the Court has notified all interested parties about the application for a hardship discharge.  It’s giving them each one month to respond and then a ruling will be forthcoming.  However, the timing of this will be critical.  The objection date is 07-23 and The date the Trustee’s office said they would submit a motion to the court for non payment is 07-25 (I am not certain and won’t know until I get home).  My hope is that the court makes their ruling BEFORE the Trustee can file his motion for dismissal.  If a Discharge is granted then it’s for sure I am 100% protected, if not then it will be a wait and see approach.  So I am prepared for the BIG decision and will be anxiously awaiting to see how this turns out.  It will be a very good thing when I can put this behind me and be able to move on with life. 

Last night I got a call from my brother, which was a total surprise.  Turns out my mom didn’t make up the whole deal about a creditor says she owes them money.  So I explained to him that what is needed is the source of the information or in simple terms where is the bank getting this from.  Her credit reports are clean.  Then what type of debt is it mortgage debt, credit card debt, personal loan debt.  If it’s credit card debt then she can sue the creditor for violation of the courts discharge order and collect money.  I told him that it’s probably a good idea to check with the County to make sure there aren’t liens filed against the property, if it’s a creditor that was discharged then that too would be a clear violation of the courts order. 

Then we moved on to the part where he started asking me for relationship advice.  So he is caught in the middle between having to care for our mom and trying to maintain a relationship with his girlfriend.  He told me that his girlfriend told him to ask me for advice.  I think the conversation had a different twist on it.  I think she wants me to start taking care of mom so she can have my brother.  Sorry but that isn’t going to happen.  I told him that he needs to sit down with his girlfriend and have a frank conversation.  He needs to find out if she is okay with things as they are now with the possibility of exploring new options when her lease is up.  Meaning they could find a house and move in together.  If she is willing to work with him then I told him it showed promise but if she was close minded then no matter how much he loved her it wouldn’t work.  He is afraid of losing her because he really loves her.  I explained to him that a relationship is all about give and take – compromise.  Sometimes you get to give and other times you get to take, but you have to be willing and able to do both or it just won’t work.  I am no love doctor or expert by any means.  I know based off of the long term relationship that I was in that there is a lot of compromise.  It sounds like he is going to have his heart broken, she seems to me like the controlling type and if it can’t be her way then oops she can’t be bothered.  I am not now nor was I ever a fan of her’s.  If he chooses to be in a relationship with her that is perfectly fine.  I told him that as for mom he has the option to tell the court that he wishes to withdraw as her guardian and then the court would put someone from the State in charge of her and I have no idea where she would live or how her expenses would be managed.  From what I have learned her expenses far exceed her income.  My brother is covering all of the excess, which is not a good thing.  However, he lives in the same house and it makes sense that he contributes.  I kind of feel this is payback for all of the times when we were growing up that Grandpa charged me rent but he was the golden child and didn’t have to pay a dime.  It’s totally unfair but who ever said life would be fair?  

Work is hopping so I need to get back to it.  I hope all is well in your world.  One more day for me and then I go on vacation for 4 days.  I am thinking 4 days with no email and no phone ringing and no work.  Yeah that is something to look forward to.  Talk with you all again soon.  Be well and stay cool & dry!

22 June 2015


I heard from the Bankruptcy Attorney, he is pissed at me because I stopped making payments.  He said that is not my decision to make and that I shouldn’t arbitrarily make those decisions as it will impact the case.  My answer is its my fucking money and I will spend it as I see fit.  He finally got up off his lazy ass and filed the motion for Hardship Discharge.  Now because there isn’t actually enough money paid in this could be rejected. He said that the trustee objected originally but has since had a change of heart and will not oppose the motion.  If all of that is true then there should be nothing to worry about.  Because the case will be discharged.  So they don’t need any more money.  He spelled out in the motion that the debtor is dead, that the court was notified about it and that the probate estate has run out of funds.  The probate estate never existed but now he claims to represent the probate estate in his motion when he is a Bankruptcy attorney and not a Probate attorney.  I think he is a fucking asshole and I can’t wait to get away from him. 

I obtained a copy of the motion and viewed it with my own eyes so I know for a fact that it was filed.  This is what I have been waiting on since March it’s June.  Just think if he would have followed through and done his job back in March then this wouldn’t be such a huge issue.  He said that the creditors haven’t been paid enough money.  Yeah well I see it differently they have been paid far too much money because it was all my money.  It came directly out of my pocket and therefore I feel as if he should have filed this motion 2 years ago instead of waiting, but that is my opinion.  The law doesn’t make a whole lot of sense to us common folk.  All I know is I want this motion granted and then my troubles with this Bankruptcy business are over with and there will be no worry.  If the motion isn’t granted then the case will be dismissed for non-payment, unless I suddenly feel the need to throw away more money.  Either way this is coming to an end it’s just a matter of how it will end.

It’s just been a crazy day over all.  I had a Spinach & Mushroom pizza last night and will be finishing it off tonight.  Found frozen Frisco Melts from Steak N Shake in the grocery store yesterday. So I guess you could say good things are happening.

The kids rang in another birthday and while I am sure they didn’t understand what I meant when I wished each of the a happy birthday, I did it to keep up the tradition.  The day is winding down, time to run because were just a little swamped

21 June 2015

Happy Father’s Day

Lot’s of guys today are celebrating Father’s Day.  I myself am a Pet Dad and that is the closest that I believe I will ever become to being a father. 

As for my father I never knew him, he chose to disown me and my brother.  Why?  My best guess is because he wasn’t ready to be a father.  He just wanted to have a good time and didn’t think that little squirt would turn into a human being.  He got his rocks off a couple times and called it a day.  While I understand about getting your rocks off, I don’t understand how you can turn your back on something that you created.  Plus think of all of the harm you did by walking away.  There are psychological issues that come with being abandoned and having to grow up without your actual father being around.

Fortunately for my brother and I we had our grandparents to raise us.  Each of them imparted knowledge and wisdom.  In some ways this was better because they had been around the block more than our Mother, so I’d like to think that we are a little better off.  While I didn’t get along with my Grandfather I did care for him.  My sexuality was the elephant in the room that we just never talked about.  He knew I was gay but neither of us knew how to broach the subject, so what resulted in keeping feelings bottled up was tension which fueled many disagreements.  We tolerated each other.  I miss him.  I am certain that he never expected me to amount to anything.  Why?  Because he told me so.  How surprised he would be that I climbed the ladder and am making a decent living, own a house, two vehicles and 5 cats.  While my brother didn’t make it in the world and he is stuck working a manual labor job, has taken serious cuts in pay, let his health go and is stuck with a  girlfriend.  That just isn’t the way Grandpa envisioned things turning out but they did.  Grandpa planted a seed by telling me that I would amount to nothing.  It was a challenge for me to disprove him and I did.  He coddled my brother because they saw eye to eye on everything.  In the end I think I got the better deal. 

In some ways my late partner was also a father figure for me.  He encouraged me and stood by me in trying times.  He pushed me to go farther and reach for the stars.  He didn’t believe that I had a learning disability.  He realized that was an excuse to hide behind.  So it took a little extra effort to get me to learn, I wasn’t disabled in anyway – I just needed some extra time to catch on.  His own son abandoned him and that crushed him.  He was taken advantage of and hurt many times over.  It was sad to see someone who actually had a father toss him away like a cellophane rapper.  I sure miss him, but have learned to move on with my life as uncomfortable as it is.

Then there is Father LB the cat that I lost last month.  We just called him LB but I referred to him at times as Father LB.  I remember when he had kittens with Angel.  She was a beautiful cat but I don’t have any photos of her.  While a human couldn’t touch LB, he let his children climb all over him.  He baby sat them while momma had some alone time.  I remember that event like it was yesterday.  LB was a great father.  I miss him and being able to hold him in my arms, scratch his back and belly while watching him eat it up.  He was a very good cat and I know that his life was better because our paths crossed.

Most any guy can father a child, the real challenge is being a Dad.  That means you raise your kids, help them learn wrong from right, teach them and bring them up.  That your there for them in good times and in bad.  You get where I’m going with this.  I think it’s great that we have Father’s Day but this day for me isn’t about Father’s it’s about Dad’s.  They are the ones who deserve to have this special day.

So to all the Dad’s Happy Father’s Day!

20 June 2015

Average Saturday

As you can tell by the title it was an Average Saturday for me.  I woke up in plenty of time.  I elected not to visit the eye doctor to get my glasses adjusted.  I think I fixed that problem on my own.

I did venture to the post office but nothing there but junk.  Went on to have breakfast at Huddle House.  I got a Philly Cheesesteak Omelet and it was very tasty.  Had Toast and Grits washed it all down with a Diet Soda.  Pretty good and cheap as well.  Afterwards I came home.

Watched a movie 7 Psychopaths.  It was stupid but it was one of those movies that you wanted to know how it ends, so it compelled me to keep watching.  I squeezed in a nap and Gator was laying on me the whole time.  She has become quite the Daddy’s girl and loves to be the center of attention at all times.  It’s rather annoying to me, not to mention to her mother as well.

Got all of the cat fur off of my shirt and went out for dinner.  I visited a place that I have wanted to go to for a long time.  It’s not cheap but I have never been there.  Looked at the menu on line and was all set on a burger.  Got there and saw Bacon Wrapped Meatloaf, topped with BBQ Sauce and it came with fresh green beans, two onion rings and mashed potatoes.  Holy crap that was some meal.  I dared to keep going and had the White Chocolate Blueberry Bread Pudding.  As Bread Pudding goes this was crap.  It was dry and they served it with a scoop of ice cream that was the size of a melon ball.  I enjoyed myself and had some good food.  It was nice but the whole time I kept thinking I wish my late partner were here to experience this with me.  The bill would have been double but I think he would have said the same thing I did… this is so good that I will be back!

Ventured on to the pet food store.  Got the children their food.  Then I wanted to visit the hardware store but my belly said go home.  So that is where I went.  I am still stuffed and that was several hours ago.  No more food for me, until tomorrow.

I need to pick up Water Softener Salt, but there is always a tomorrow.  My late partners vehicle is starting to act up.  Hesitating when I press on the gas, acts like it wants to die at a stop light.  Then today for a short time I couldn’t roll down any of the windows.  I kept thinking cancel the service on both vehicles and instead prepare to purchase a new one.  It’s a great idea but I am conflicted about what to do.  Part of me says move forward and the other part of me says hold off.  So doing nothing can’t hurt.  Maybe I will work it all out in therapy and then on Saturday I will get a new car.  Who knows. 

The rain here has stopped and the sun is out and it’s very hot.  This is the weekend of home coming and they always manage to pick a hot weekend for it.  I never go.  We used to visit just to see the parade and then leave.  After a couple times, that got to be old hat so we decided no more.  I thought about going back but decided to skip it. 

I picked up some gift cards.  1 for the attorney who gave me free advice and 1 for a guy at work who has helped me out time and time again.  I learned Taco Bell was his weakness.  I wrote a fan letter to Joey Graceffa and mailed that along with the gift card for the attorney. 

As for the Bankruptcy Attorney he is close and I am thinking about going down to his office.  However, if things are as I suspected that he has let all of his office staff go, the front door very well might be locked and he is under no obligation to answer.  So that could be a wasted effort.  I am planning on calling him and seeing what if any response that brings.  The whole thing makes no sense to me.  I’m asking for a status update – simple words that would take no more than 2 minutes tops if he leaves out all of the lawyer lingo and speaks in plain English. 

My friend that I had the spat with last weekend hasn’t phoned.  That is not exactly uncommon.  I was the last to call her on Monday and I figured that she would reach out to me.  She knew that I was getting my review on Friday.  I am concerned but right now I am letting her make the next move.  I am not calling her not even next Friday when I know the ceremony will be going on.  I did nothing wrong, other than snoop and find out the truth on line.  I always heard that my nose would get me in trouble and this wouldn’t be the first time and it won’t be the last time. 

I am bored with life.  The routine works to keep me functioning but it doesn’t bring me happiness.  I miss happiness and being one with another guy.  Right now I am trying to think of what to do next Friday since all I have booked is my Therapy appointment.  I may do my blood work then but what after that?  I thought about taking Marv to the vet but that isn’t something I really don’t want to do.  Not because of money but more because of how uncomfortable it will make him.  Trying to keep myself entertained is a full time job and when I plan something or come up with an idea I usually wind up talking myself out of it.  I know that isn’t healthy but it’s just how I am.

Pride is coming up and one of the gals at work is encouraging me to go.  I’ve never been to a Pride Parade or Event.  They are supposed to be fun and of course filled with guys.  I’ve got mixed feelings on this as well and doubt seriously if I will go.  There was another pride event that I didn’t know about that took place today not terribly far from home.  It was more of a surprise that it snuck up on me. 

So there is my Saturday.  Tomorrow is the kids Birthday.  So I will be trying to cater to them all tomorrow since it’s their special day.  Who am I kidding all I do is cater to them.  I try to make their birthday special even though it’s just another day for them.  Birthday’s to me are just not the same once you become an adult.

Okay well before I kill any sense of happiness you might have I am going to run along now.  Enjoy your evening and the rest of the weekend.  Monday will be calling soon enough.  Cheers!

19 June 2015

Crazy Days

Yesterday and again today have been crazy.  I had two networking issues going on yesterday at the office, mix that in with the rest of a normal day and it went from 0 to 120 in about 8 seconds flat.  It was truly a whirlwind day.  This morning I found out about an office move at the very last minute and had to scramble to accommodate that.  I worked up quite a sweat but got the job done. 

My review is in.  Turns out there were no surprises.  It was a rave review and in all but 1 category I scored the highest rating.  It was very straight forward.  My boss set goals for me, of course they do that without talking with you first.  I was told that for being so new I am doing a phenomenal job.  Quite a change from where I was a year ago.  I never got positive feedback like this in my last job, it was all about ‘getting the job done’ and there might have been a thanks tossed in once and a while.  I am appreciated and needed here.  Things couldn’t have worked out better for me.  Now the two areas that I don’t like won’t be going away anytime soon.  So I will either have to suck it up or look for another job.  Right now looking for another job doesn’t sound like the best thing to do.  I have the confidence to believe that things would be okay if I signed up for car payments or any other long term contract type service or product.  That doesn’t mean I am going to do it, but it sure does make it attractive.

Part of my reasoning behind not wanting to reward myself with a new car are being held back by fear.  What if things turn sour with this Bankruptcy business and I need money to pay for legal bills.  Better to know that you can afford it and have it in reserve than to commit it to something and then wonder how you will come up with the money when the crisis arises.  It’s no surprise that the Bankruptcy attorney hasn’t responded to the certified letter and there have been no motions filed with the court at the time I am posting this.  While I already know my plan of attack, I don’t have to show my cards to him.  I am still going to press him and see if I can’t find out why he is doing nothing.  That is rather difficult when he has turned into being non responsive.  Maybe he thinks I will just give up and go away, but I will pester him until he either cracks or it is proving to be pointless.  Right now there is still time for him to act, maybe I can cajole him into action.  I just don’t understand why he would tell me one thing and then do nothing. 

Today is Momma’s birthday.  If my figures are correct 12 years ago I brought her into the house.  We were in a heat wave, she was miserable and very pregnant.  I just decided enough with this living outside crap – bring her indoors so she could have her children and then we could figure things out.  I didn’t anticipate that someone would give them names and that we would wind up keeping them all.  It’s been a very long and bumpy road.  We almost lost Momma once when she decided to stop eating.  Thankfully with the help of the vet we were able to nurse her back to health.  She is as playful today as she was 12 years ago after she had her children.  Before the kids were born she was in no mood to play and you couldn’t pet her below her neck, if you did she would squeal and growl.  I guess it hurt or she was afraid.  I remember that she went ape shit on my because I touched her belly.  I wanted to strike back but I just looked at her and backed away.  She got the point that I wasn’t happy and I got that point that she didn’t want to be messed with.  She is my cat and she follows me most everywhere I go in the house.  Always wanting to be by my side.  She knows who saved her and she is very thankful.  I wished her a happy birthday this morning and rubbed her a little bit.  She ate it up.  I don’t think she understands about today but I am doing my very best to let her know that I am proud of her and that I appreciate her.  Not just today but everyday.  The fun will continue when I get to wish all 4 kids a happy birthday on Sunday. 

Very thankful today is Friday.  I need to rest.  My upper back is driving me nuts with muscle spasms.  I took 1/2 of a muscle relaxer last night along with 1 sleeping pill.  That was a goodnight cocktail if there ever was one.  Tonight I am opting to take a full muscle relaxer in the hopes that I can knock this out.  I know it will make me want to sleep all day but I am fine with that.  If I can get moving tomorrow I’d like to have my glasses adjusted they are rubbing and digging into the side of my head, it hurts to the point where I take them off and don’t want to put them back on.  That is the only real thing on the to do list.  I have my usual weekend chores and tasks that need to be accomplished.  Next week is only 3 days long for me.  Off on Thursday going to take both vehicles in for service in the morning.  Then in the afternoon I will be going to see the doctor.  He is making me come in to get the order for the blood work because he says it’s been 6 months since I have been in.  I know that isn’t right but why argue.  He really wants to see me every 3 months but all we need to do is test my blood, you don’t need to see me unless I am having a problem.  Friday I have a therapy session scheduled.  Then the weekend is wide open and anything is possible.  I am seriously thinking of renting a carpet cleaner and getting the rugs in order – despite the fact that they are pretty well ruined and there is no point in replacing them until the pets are gone or unless I want to switch to a wood floor or a laminate.  Looking at them being dirty is kind of a huge turn off for me.  I don’t have house guests but if I should at least the place would be semi in order. 

I finished Joey’s book on the way in this morning.  I enjoyed hearing about his dating life that was rather interesting.  He iterated much of the same advice that I have heard before.  It is a good read for kids and adults.  I thought that it wouldn’t be as good as Connor Franta’s book but actually it was.  I liked them both but Joey went into much more detail about his life.  The next book to look forward to is Tyler Oakley’s.  That should be a scream and very interesting. 

It is raining here once again and will continue for the remainder of the day.  There is lots of flooding going on.  Thankfully none of that directly affects me thus far.  So long as I can make it home I will be fine.  The weekend is supposed to be filled with sunshine, which will be a very welcome change and something that people here will very much appreciate.  Then next week looks like more rain for the first part of the week.  Of course it’s a forecast so it’s subject to change.  I am ready for a nap but it’s time to get back to work.  Were on the downhill slide so it’s not terrible, I just want the hours to tick by a little faster. 

Thanks for stopping by.  I hope all is well in the world and that the sun is shining where you are at.  Hang in there, I will do the same and our paths shall cross again soon.  Take care.

18 June 2015

2 Factor Authentication

With hacking becoming more and more of a common everyday occurrence, it seems as if nothing and/or no one is immune.  Recently Last Pass which is a password vault service became a target.  Fortunately, they have some good security in place and there is a minimal risk to anyone that uses the service.  Since this type of event seems to be on the rise there are several things that you can do to protect yourself at last a little bit. 

First if you are using Last Pass make sure that you change your master password, like right now!  That is presuming you haven’t done it already. 

Second, turn on two factor authentication.  I wasn’t aware they had such a thing for free users but they do.  I chose to use a service called Toopher.  You go through the steps online to tell Last Pass that you want to turn on the service, I believe it’s under Account Settings.  Then you download the app on your phone.  When you open the app, tell it that you want to pair with a new service.  It will give you a passphrase typically two words.  Type those words into Last Pass and presto your account is paired up.  Then when you want to login to Last Pass do so as you normally would.  An alert will pop up on your phone from Toopher.  Tell Toopher that you wish to allow the login and then your in.  Just that easy.  So now if someone has your master password they don’t have the 2nd piece of the puzzle which is your phone, so they cant login. 

Lots of services and accounts offer two factor authentication.  It’s a smart thing that makes the bad guys job harder.  I won’t say that it can’t be defeated because in today’s world it seems like something new is invented and someone finds a way to crack it.  However, it is something that BIG business has used for years.  Ever hear of an RSA Token?  It’s a device that typically you carry on a key ring.  It displays a series of numbers that change like every 30 seconds.  The token is paired with a server that tells it what series of numbers (keys) to generate.  Big Business has used that for years, but it isn’t cheap. 

The moral of the story is make it difficult for others to hack and you can rest easy.  A good password is another step and of course change them often.  It’s something that is said time and time again but it’s true.  I am guilty of not changing passwords but recently I have been more on the ball.  At work I am forced to change my password even on my phone, which is tied to work I have to change my PIN every 90 days and it remembers the last 24 numbers.  Talk about a memory.  It makes life difficult but minor inconvenience is worth the piece of mind it brings.  Last Pass is a great service and I highly recommend it if your looking for a password manager. 

If you want to geek out and learn more about the hack check out Security Now with Steve Gibson on twit.tv.  Happy Thursday! 

17 June 2015

Audio Books

I managed to tear through Connor Franta’s book.  With the rainy and slow drive home it gave me extra listening time.  I learned a little bit more about this You tuber.  The overall thought that I took away was be yourself and don’t be afraid to try new things.  If your not happy then your not living.  Lots of familiar sounding themes that I have heard previously.  I will admit that I am not the general demographic that this book is targeted to, so with that I will say the advice is on point and should help a lot of younger adults. 

This morning I moved on to Joey Graceffa’s book.  Thus far I find it interesting.  We have more in common than I thought.  Joey’s book is much longer so needless to say it’s going to take longer to get through.  I am looking forward to lunch so that I can get more listening time in. 

In the mail yesterday was the green card that showed my letter was delivered to the Bankruptcy attorney.  He signed for it himself.  When you call you get voice mail.  So it sounds like he is winding up his practice to me.  He apparently no longer has support staff or if he does they are truly hidden from the general public.  What I don’t understand in all of this is that he kept spewing the same thing pay in x amount and we can then petition the court for a hardship discharge.  Now that amount has been paid in, he suddenly doesn’t want to do the job he was hired to do and represent his client to the best of his abilities.  I don’t understand why you would tell someone something have them follow your advice and then when it’s time for you to step up to the plate, your not there to do your part.  So I am mad and hurt by his inactions.  I am waiting to see if I get any response.  If I do I will be surprised.  If nothing comes through shortly I will start calling on a daily basis like a bill collector trying to evoke a response.  Finally I will send him one last letter that will simply ask why have you failed your client.  Why am I after him when I found out yesterday that all should be okay?  Well it’s the fact that he promised to do something and now he’s not doing it.  If he followed through on his part and things went the way I think they would, then there wouldn’t be a worry in the world.  Granted what I was told yesterday does bring some comfort but I am just not one to take that advice and be calm about it.  I like absolutes (not the vodka) and right now I am dealing with variables which causes me to worry.  There is one year left in the Bankruptcy case before it would normally conclude but I see no reason to continue throwing my money away.  It would be different if I was dealing with Estate money but there is no estate – I am it.  He left nothing behind but debt and worldly possessions.  Which I suspect is very common when people depart this world.

I watched a movie last night and enjoyed what little time I had at home.  The weather here is wet – more rain than one place on earth needs at one time.  That is what is in the foreseeable future.  People being dumb driving into flooded roads getting killed and stranded.  Like other severe weather people seem to loose their mind like they never saw water before.  I just keep an extra eye out and drive slower than normal.  The roads I take are fine, just wet.  Nothing like driving in the rain it’s like world’s largest inchworm moving at a speed slower than a turtle. 

Well back to the old bump and grind.  Happy hump day.  Talk with you all again soon.

16 June 2015

Good News

So I talked with the attorney that I was referred to and he told me that I should just let the Bankruptcy case be dismissed, I wasted my money and was given bad advice.  My late partners debts expired upon his death.  As for being sued after the fact well that was a scare tactic that was used.  Once the case is dismissed, it’s done – no one will sue me.  The case is done. 

Now I think that is good news but I really find it hard to believe.  I am going to take the advice but if things go south I know who’s door to knock on and ask for help.  I just hope this all plays out well.  For giggles I still check to see if there have been any motions filed in the case and thus far nothing. 

I spoke with the Estate Attorney that I hired and he told me, you need to find yourself another Bankruptcy Attorney.  Yeah not really.  He hasn’t answered my specific questions regarding the Estate.  Bottom line is I think I got scammed and these two were playing off of each other.  Why is it always when your down people kick you or take advantage of you?  I just don’t understand it.  Seems like they would want to help you, rather than hurt you – especially since none of that money went to them.

I am of course very interested to see how this plays out and pray that I am on the right path. Time will of course tell.

Work has been a real bitch today, trying to play catch up for being out a day isn’t fun.  Next week I will be out for two days and hate to see what I will be coming back to.  All I know is that I will have my work email disabled on my phone and won’t be worrying about it while I am off.  I need to make calls to schedule appointments for the vehicles and see about getting an appointment with the foot doctor, be it this month or next. 

I joined Audible again to get Connor Franta’s book.  It’s really good and I have listened to it on the way to work this morning as well as at lunch time.  More on the way home too.  Then I will be moving on to Joey Graceffa’s book next.  Then I am done with Audible for now.  I know that I left a credit behind when I cancelled my membership last time, but apparently credits expire when your membership does.  Would have been nice to know that.  I am not much of a reader and will admit audio books are much more entertaining.  Plus there is just something about hearing certain peoples voices.  Neil Patrick Harris, Connor Franta are both two of my favorites.  Joey well he tends to get a bit femy and that is kind of a turn off for me. 

So here I sit biding my time and waiting to depart the office and jump into rush hour traffic and rain.  A stop to get the mail and then to go home.  Mexican food tonight.  Then a short rest – some sleep mixed in and it will be time to do it all over again tomorrow.  Feels like yesterday was a holiday so my brain thinks today is Monday.  Happy Tuesday, talk with you on Wednesday.

15 June 2015

No One Said It Would Be Easy

Yesterday was a very difficult day for me.  I hashed things out with my friend.  Her son put her in a hell of a position but this is me we are talking about.  I mean we have told each other things that shouldn’t have been told.  I weighed my options and parting ways, well it wouldn’t solve anything and it would hurt us both.  Frankly we need each other.  I was really deeply hurt and disappointed in her.  However, I have chosen to continue our friendship.  This little escapade took up a good part of my afternoon and evening.  I was not a happy person.

To further complicate things Mr. Bear had one of his diarrhea attacks and he got another bath in the kitchen sink.  He stressed himself out so much he began throwing up – it was dry heaves, which I think is worse than actually throwing up.  Poor guy he was a mess.  That extra stress isn’t good for him but he was messed up beyond what I could repair with a paper towel or baby wipe.  This continued well past 10pm. 

Finally we all settled in to bed and called it a night.  I got to see Ron White’s Comedy Salute to the troops, which wasn’t that funny.  I got to see Last Week Tonight and Nurse Jackie – both okay. 

I woke up this morning at 5a and my allergies were acting up.  I kind of had a feeling if I got going that things would calm down.  I was to the point where I didn’t give a damn about anyone or anything.  I had breakfast, fed the children and then took my medicine along with a Benadryl.  I wanted to take 2 but only took 1.  I took the day off from work, which was also against my better judgment but I did it.  I slept a few extra hours in the morning.  The children benefited by getting lunch.  I ate some Chex Mix and drank a soda.  I took an afternoon nap.  I watched the movie The Judge.  It was a great movie and didn’t exactly go as I thought it would.  At the end of the movie Willie Nelson sings a song The Scientist which was written by Cold Play.  That song sent me over the edge.  The longer I listened to it the more I realized that I am all alone and my life has been miserable at best since my partner passed away.  I keep on fighting one battle after another.  It’s been that way for some 2 years now.  I am tired, I want to give up, I want it all to be over.  I’d like very much to start a new but finding someone to start a new with is proving more difficult than I thought.  BTW I am not a Willie Nelson fan, but I think he did a good job with the song.

Last night I looked at the site that my mom referred me to.  It’s for Catholic Gay’s.  Yeah it’s not exactly conversion therapy but they don’t encourage you to find a mate, they want you to be abstinent so that your not ‘sinning’.   Yeah she might have thought it was a dating site but it’s very much not that.  Skipping this one.  They can work their magic on someone else.

When I talked with my therapist one of the things that I talked about is a Psychotic Break.  I didn’t know what it was.  The simple version is that everyday tasks are so overwhelming people just stop functioning.  They usually wind up in a hospital in order to get better.  The fix for Mental Health is pills – lots of them and talking.  Not to mention if you get Mental Help there are things in life that you can no longer do because society things that your incapable of making an intelligent decision.  It is unlikely that I will suffer from this.  However, with days like today I begin to wonder.  I really don’t want to be around anyone or anything, just left alone.  That soon wears off and I wind up feeling guilty because I didn’t go to work or because I wasted a day. 

The upside of this is that I did venture out to Cracker Barrel and had a nice early supper.  Catfish, Mac & Cheese, Carrots and Green Beans.  Corn Bread and a couple Diet Sodas to wash it all down.  Then I finished up with Strawberry Shortcake.  It was yummy and wound up costing me close to $20 with tip.  I got to see a cute cashier that I have a crush on, we didn’t interact but I did see him.  I also managed to get the trash out early before the storm hit. 

Tomorrow life goes back to normal.  I am not so sure that I am ready for that.  We were very busy today and I am kind of glad that I got to sit this one out. 

I got confirmation that my letter made it to the Bankruptcy Attorney.  I thought perhaps that along with the letter from the Trustee’s office would have jolted him into action.  In checking with The Court there has been no action taken as of today.  Tomorrow I get to talk with the attorney that I was referred to to find out what if any should be my next move.  I pray that it won’t be a fight and that there won’t be any liability I am looking at.  If my brain was functioning I should have called the Estate Attorney today but didn’t think of that until it was too late.  Yeah so tomorrow is another day. 

Given that I am uncertain of what my future holds at this point, I have elected not to terminate my relationship with my therapist. 

I learned today that Lass Pass was hacked, so if you use that service like I do, you want to change your master password.  Your individual accounts are safe at this point.  I double checked all of my financial accounts and had problems with 1 bank, I was starting to panic but eventually I was able to login, changed that password and found that none of my accounts had been tampered with.  In this day and age it’s easy to login to someone's bank account and transfer money to another account with a couple clicks.  I don’t need any more trauma or drama in my life – there is plenty going on already.  Stay tuned if I hear of anything else about this I will be sure to post it.  Seems like now a days no one or nothing is off limits it’s like hack the world.  Were all going to go nuts trying to remember passwords, security passphrases and the answers to our security questions.  Ah, technology your such a pain in the ass sometimes. 

I leave you with the video of The Scientist as preformed by Willie Nelson at the end of the movie The Judge.  Talk with you all again soon.  Thanks for listening/reading. 

14 June 2015

From Bad to Worse

I was able to accomplish all of the tasks I set out to do.  That is a little glimmer of positivity in what is going to turn out to be a negative post.

Saturday’s mail brought me the dread 45 day letter.  Letting me know that the Bankruptcy payments are behind and that I need to get current with in the next 45 days or the case will be dismissed.  This is exactly what I was trying to avoid, but at least I have 45 days.  I think my letter that was sent to the Bankruptcy attorney is on point and timed even more perfectly, because he too will get a copy of the letter that I got, letting him know that payments aren’t being made.  Perhaps that will cajole him into action, but I am not holding my breath.

I was able to find my therapist new place without any problems and there was no rain.  The place is amazing and the building still smells new, which is a good thing.  In this session she kept on with her persisting theme of trying to get me to see another therapist because she feels that I am in need of weekly therapy.  This is a conversation that we have had for the last several months and it’s getting old.  I am to the point where I am debating terminating our relationship.  I have the letter written, I am just debating on what to do because once I move forward I won’t be able to back track.  I am an adult and fully capable of making arrangements and asking for more help if I feel I need it.  Right now I am scheduled to go back in a couple weeks.  She did provide me with some names of other therapists to check out if I wanted to.  One of them was a man who is closer and deals with LGBT issues.  My reason for not wanting to change is because I have to rehash the past and I feel like that will hinder progress – it will take at least one if not two sessions to catch someone else up to speed.  I view that as a waste of time.

So I had those two things on my mind.  Last night I got curious about my friend’s son’s graduation as a State Trooper.  I pay taxes in that state and feel that it is my right to attend the ceremony if I so chose.  Well turns out I found out that it is open to the public.  I confronted my friend about it and she admitted to lying to me.  She said that her son didn’t want anyone but immediate family because this was his special day.  She thought originally that I would figure things out and think that I was disinvited because I am gay.  I told her that never entered my mind.  I figured that I wasn’t wanted but couldn’t put my finger on it.  Now that I have the truth I have half a mind to show up and boo his ass off the stage at the risk of being arrested.  Will I do that?  Nope.  I may attend just to spite them but when I think about it, I would have to stay over one night or get up super early to travel the next day.  It would wipe me out and really it’s not worth it.  Now I am debating on what to do with my friend.  Lying is like a pet peeve of mine – get caught and were pretty much done.  There are other mitigating factors here and I am not quite sure what to do.  I don’t have that many friends.  The biggest factor is that if I chose to terminate a friendship that will have a serious negative impact on her health.  I don’t want that to be the action that sends her to her grave or even gets her closer to the grave.  Trust me when I say it won’t take much and she will just fall right in. 

If I move forward and toss my therapist as well as my friend aside then I will be down to 2 guy friends – both of which are married and straight.  1 of which has chosen to place some distance between us and the other who is unemployed.  So it doesn’t exactly put the odds in my favor, so I am very hesitant to act.  Once I make up my mind my decision will be final and there won’t be any changing it. 

In the world of dating my therapist found an organization that she thought I might have an interest in.  It’s for gay and bi men who want to socialize.  It’s a secret club like the Masons.  So if your out they will publish your name, address, phone number and email address on the membership list – that is circulated to other members who are out.  However, if you aren’t out then you won’t get listed but you also won’t get a copy of the membership list.  There is a cost of $10 per year to join, which isn’t bad but they also expect you to volunteer for something.  They publish a monthly newsletter and distribution takes place electronically if you want it mailed you have to pay extra for that.  If you chose the electronic method then you will get the super secret password they protect their documents with and can view it.  I tried to hack the password of the current months newsletter but it’s encrypted so it would take literally years upon years to figure it out.

My mom phoned and told me that she found a dating site for homosexual men and they are all catholic.  Yippee just what I want a catholic guy.  Religion plays a very small part it’s more about the person and less about what their beliefs are.  I told her that I would check it out.  It doesn’t look that appealing from the quick glance I gave it.  I am going to take a closer look as soon as I am done here.

Then I find out that my mom is the one who threw the monkey wrench into this home loan thing.  She told the bank well I think I might owe xyz bank but I am not sure.  All of the work I did on her Bankruptcy and pulling those documents last week was not not.  I ran up a huge bill for nothing.  Now she has to produce documentation saying there isn’t a lean against her property and called me to ask for the number to the bank.  I told her liens are handled by the county and you will need to call them.  Oh she said will they mail me something saying there is not lien?  I said nope you will have to request that in person and they charge for that, it’s not free.  I told her she should have kept her damn mouth shut and that would have made life so much easier for everyone.  I knew there was more to the story than I was getting.  The only way a financial institution knows that you owe money to another bank is if it’s listed on your credit report.  Liens on the property are another matter and she would have been served if there was in fact a lien.  Then she begged me to pick her up so we could go out to eat because she is lonely.  She asked me how I combat the loneliness and I told her I have a job that keeps me pretty well occupied, provided I am moving I don’t have time to think too much about what I don’t have or what I lost. 

So between the Bankruptcy, My therapist, My lying friend and my mother I am at my wits end.  I know not what is the right move because I am overwhelmed.  Now moving on to continuing to relax, watch TV and maybe even nap.  Sunday is 1/2 over with and it seems like forever before it will end. 

I sure hope that you had a much nicer weekend that I did.  Here’s to better times ahead.  Oh I wore my rainbow shirt out and not one comment.  I guess people either don’t know what to say or are afraid of offending me.  Kind of nice to be able to make a statement without any rebuttal.