Another bumpy week

WORK

Yes, another work week has ended! Friday was a little bit of a nightmare. My dumbass co-worker took Friday off and that left me to process all the departures. I can handle it, I mean for the longest time I was the only person doing them. So, I had 2 and then came 3 and abruptly someone forgot and there was a 4^th. Just a little bit of panic and stress but I made it through just fine Just when things settle down a big blow came, I heard we have plans to close an entire small office soon. That will be a bunch more departures. I’ve already started prepping and it shouldn’t be horrible.

Next week will be my last week working with our help desk guy. I have got to know him, trust him and confide in him. He’s like my super close friend at work. It sucks that I won’t have anyone once he leaves. I also won’t get to hear the inside track on certain things but hopefully as soon as they find a replacement for him, that will change. I expect it to take at least a month but it could be longer. I also suspect that once he leaves, I won’t hear from him again or at least with any frequency. Were close but work is our common thread. Once that thread doesn’t exist and he is in a different part of the state the old adage ‘Out of sight … out of mind’ will come to play and that will be that.

HOME & CATS

Got a call this week that legal action was pending against me because of fraud on my SSN, some scammer wanted me to call them back and talk with an “officer”. Yeah sure thing I’ll jump right on that. I turned them into the IRS and blocked the caller. Good thing my job includes fraud and cyber security. I can see where the unsuspecting and uneducated average person would fall for this and several other scams. In the US the IRS doesn’t call people and they certainly don’t ask for payment over the phone. If the IRS wants to contact you, you’ll get a letter in the mail. The worst part of this scam was that they had an automated recorder making the calls and it was like an 80’s style computer voice so it stood out to me right away.

My tax refund came this week as well. I paid my state tax today and put another chunk towards my auto insurance. I could have paid it off but the balance that is left is so small that I can wipe it out in no time with a couple paychecks. I opted to keep some for me. Treated myself on Friday evening to a Large Chili and a Double Cheeseburger from Wendy’s. It was only $8 but well worth every penny. Both items are things that I crave and very much enjoy from Wendy’s. They have the best chili for a fast food restaurant. Steak N Shake is okay but Wendy’s is my top pick.

Today I bit the bullet and made a vet appointment for Marv. He’s going in next Saturday for an exam and blood work. I am kind of scared to go because I feel my time is limited with him but perhaps, I am overly sensitive and over reacting a bit. Earlier this week I saw him limping and thought he broke a foot but turns out the big lug just stepped in wet litter and it dried in his paw. That would make it difficult for anyone to walk. Cleaning it up I know didn’t come without pain but I got him back on the straight and narrow. I had to take him to the kitchen sink and held him the entire time. He cried like I was trying to murder him by plucking out his fur one by one. Seriously he got very worked up and I didn’t like that at all. His paw smells horrible but he’s not limping. His IBS (Irritable Bowl Syndrome) is way out of control and that is mostly due to the Thyroid medicine he has to take. I’m to the point where I need refills on his meds and that can’t happen without an office visit since it’s been a while since he has been seen. Ms. Momma needs to have her blood work done as well. Cats and pets of any nature are expensive. Just like a hobby they require money.

Earlier this week I saw a white cat with black markings. It was under the neighbor’s van and when it saw my vehicle get close it scurried off. By the time I got in the house it was at the back door and Gator was having a small fit. It saw me and took off in a mad dash. It was cold out and I felt really bad for it. Not sure if it was someone’s pet or if it just got dumped, but was very well groomed. Haven’t seen it since but I am on the lookout.

Went to breakfast this morning at where else but Cracker Barrel. Walked out with a Coconut Candle and a $35 bill. In the past I have always asked for extra grits with my breakfast and there was no charge now they charge $1.35 for a tiny bowl and if you get a big bowl it’s $5. Not sure why the change. Most people from the waitresses I have talked to skip the grits. I can’t get enough of them, give me a little sugar substitute and its warm goodness for my tummy and a great way to start off the day. If I could make them quickly like they do at the restaurant I would have them for my own breakfast every day. Bad enough that I eat oatmeal year-round. Yeah, it’s old but it works. Sugar cereal brings out the beast in me and I can devour an entire box in one sitting and then eventually get the sugar crash, so it’s far better to have oatmeal.

I have been thinking about Ruth this past week. Oddly enough there is a new pizza place in town and I looked them up on the web. They have a pizza called Ruthie and it’s sweet and spicy just like my little girl used to be. She looked so innocent but once you approached her you saw the tiger in her come out and she was instantly pissed. I really don’t know why her loss has bothered me so much, I guess it has a lot to do with her personality and how quickly things went from bad to worse. I wrote her a letter which helps with the grieving process. It is in draft mode and I need to finalize it. That is something that I am procrastinating on doing because it’s the last step. I know that she passed months ago but with past cats and loss, this is truly the final step and then I am able to move on. Part of me wants to and part of me doesn’t want to.

I didn’t go to that pizza place this time but it’s on my list of places to visit. I went to another chain restaurant. Wow I sat down and noticed this twink with a baseball cap on backwards and what looked like parachute pants. I was dying for him to get up so I could take a better look at his assets but that didn’t happen. If I hadn’t been through so much rejection, I may have taken a chance and asked him out but he was with his buddies and/or his boyfriend and a friend and I didn’t want to take the chance. Being alone sucks but it’s also nice in that you don’t have to answer to anyone (yeah, I know tell that to my cats).

Saw the First 48 this week and there was a case that involved a gay guy being murdered, oddly enough he had the same name as the first guy I ever had sex with but he was the wrong color the detective that worked the case is straight but damn he is fine looking! It took over a year to solve but he stuck with it and didn’t give up or take any shortcuts because of the sexuality of the victim. That was really touching. I have always enjoyed that show from the day it first aired. Not all cases and departments are as interesting as it was in the beginning but like a comedian said, watch that show and you will know locations to avoid in the US. With the way things are now you take your life in your hands just waking up and getting out of bed.

Kind of bored this evening not sure what I really want to do. I did get in a nap today with Gator. She really pushed me for lunch and eventually I gave in as I always do. They all know how to push my buttons. It’s warmer here but rainy and dreary out. That won’t last for long more cold weather I am sure is on the way but were getting closer to spring.

I have done some research today and I have 3 companies that were randomly suggested to me for yard cleanup and lawn mowing. Now I just have to contact them. I hope that I can find an awesome company that will work with my budget as well as my time schedule. I don’t look forward to paying for any of this because I know it will come at a premium price and even though I am making more money now it still will hurt. Given that I have also thought about packing up and moving, which would be my best option. Get closer to work or at least get out of this place and into someplace that takes care of everything for you. Problem is there is a ton of crap in this single-family home that is more than I can handle and while a good portion of it will be left behind, there are certain things I want. I’d like to be able to wave a magic wand and presto everything would be done. However, I won’t make any moves most likely until the cats are gone and I am not interested in hurrying things along. I love this house and the positive memories that it holds and the fact that I am a homo homeowner.

Latest update on my sleeping medicine fiasco is that I haven’t heard a thing from the company that manages my benefits nor the PBM that I am required to use. I tried to get my doctors office to call in a 90-day prescription to a local pharmacy for one of the medicines and the lady I have been corresponding with isn’t that bright, she fucked it all up and first I wound up with a 10-day supply and then she fixed it by changing it to a 30-day supply. She said there would be ample refills but that too was a lie. I got the medicine today and had the pharmacy back out the insurance claim and used a savings card instead. It caused the price to go up by $2 without insurance but still it was a decent discount. I’m keeping that card and will use it in the future. Meanwhile the second medicine I take should start processing through the mail order pharmacy within the next couple weeks. My hope is that they will dispense a full 90-day supply and if that happens, I’ll be somewhat happy. Meanwhile I reached out tonight to the company that governs my healthcare and asked for an update from the letter I mailed. I’m sure they got it but it probably is in line with a ton of other people’s letters and who knows when they will get around to responding. I sort of resigned myself to give up on this but part of me wants to see if I can push them to fix this. It’s an uphill battle and very trying.

AT&T alerted me that my special discount is going to expire for my tv and phone service in 60 days. I already know they have rate hikes on top of the promotion expiring. So, I have reached out to see what kind of a deal I can swing. I know they are killing off U-verse which is what I have but I want to keep it until the very end. I mean the whole reason why I have it is because I stupidly took the word of one of there people who told me the copper phone line would be gone in 2 years. Hell, here we are some 5 years later and copper phone lines still exist, I realize they are not as common place as they once were but point is, they haven’t gone away. The best thing AT&T has going for it with this service is the whole home DVR and the ability to add a wireless receiver. So, you can move the receiver anywhere in the house and still get your TV. The cable company doesn’t have that and their DVR service is clunky as hell. They have a whole home DVR and it’s in beta where it’s been for the last 2 years. I wonder if they will ever roll it out. Changing providers does get you a cheaper rate but it’s for a limited time period and then you play the game all over again. I hate that, just give me the best price possible and I’ll be your customer for life. I don’t know that any one company feels the same way as I do. Today everything and I do mean everything is disposable that includes people as well. I’m not a fan of that. Build quality products that last and you’ll earn your money back and more on the service. Sure, wish car manufacturers would take that advice to heart. I remember the days when you could get in an accident by tapping someone’s bumper too hard, if you did any damage it was $100 or $200. Today that same tap will cost you $1,000 minimum.

Okay well enough soap box. Going to see what I can find on the net and eventually travel back up stairs to be with the cats. Take care, stay warm and be well. I’ll talk with you again soon.

Monday’s suck

It’s bad enough that today was back to work. It was made worse that one of my co-workers decided to scream at me and challenge me.  That didn’t go well but I handled it professionally, which is way different that how I would handle it personally.  I got close to telling him to go fuck himself, but thankfully that didn’t happen.  Our boss is out today but he will read all about it when he checks his email. 

Then for the main event, my other c0worker from the help desk told me that he put in his notice today.  Were pretty close and this was a major blow.  I won’t say it was unexpected, I kind of figured that he was toying with the idea. A guy we used to work with put a bug in his ear and he got on a fast track to getting hired.  He’s moving out of the area and back to where he came from, so it’s not like we will see each other again.  I do have a verbal invite to his wedding  but that is out of town and it won’t be worth my time to attend.  The other guy we work with is out on medical leave.  We sit in the same row and I will have the only cube that is occupied.  Not happy about that at all. 

Outside of that there is getting to know a new person when they find someone in several months ahead.  I don’t know that I will have the same bond with them but time will tell.  There are an overwhelmingly a lot of tech people leaving and today’s announcement set off plenty of alarms. 

I am on the fence but I have thought about leaving as well.  I’m not happy with my compensation, the fact that I am working with an idiot and a cantankerous old man.  Our boss is a waffler who has to ask his boss for permission to use the bathroom.  It’s just an all around difficult situation.  Leaving would shake things up for me and I could easily land on my fat ass.  Fear and compliance are what are keeping me put at the moment.  However, if things get worse then I will start searching.  I like my job but the politics is horrible.  Who knows maybe things will change now, all I can do is stay tuned. 

Looking forward to leaving here and heading home for left over Red Barron Pizza.  It was pretty good and hopefully it will be even better reheated.  I have some TV to catch up on.  I didn’t see John Oliver way too sleepy.  Spending sometime with the children and then calling it a night. 

More Winter weather will be moving in just in time for the evening commute Tuesday night and then the rest of it for the commute on Wednesday morning.  I am not panicking, just staying tuned to local media to hear the weather.  I make most of my decisions on what is actually on the ground and sometimes they call it wrong.  However, I wouldn’t object to time at home off work, but considering I am salaried now they will make me work even if I am at home. 

I hope your Monday was far better than mine.  I’ve got an hour and a half to go and then this day will be history.  I am also no longer on call so that helps.  The children hate my cell phone.  Ah well, stay warm and be well.  Talk with you again soon. 

Shake it up Sunday …Twist & Shout!

Here we are again, Sunday.  I love the fact that I have the day off but I hate the fact that tomorrow is back to work.  Monday is Presidents Day here in the US, which means banks and the post office are closed.  If your a government worker you probably have the day off and some but very few schools could be closed as well.  As for me, it’s just another Monday my employer is open for business.  The problem that Presidents Day is causing me is that I have bills to be paid but the bank won’t sent money until Tuesday.  So some of them are going to be close to being late but not actually late.  I like to pay as early as I can and when it gets down to the wire I not only get nervous but all sorts of alerts chirp at me and I hate that.  I had the option of paying on the 15th but that was the same day my check was deposited and in case something goes wrong I like to have a 1 day buffer just in case.  Perhaps I am overly paranoid but it works for me. 

This morning like any other Sunday morning I went rolling into Steak N Shake.  I had a cop pull in behind me and I figured he was going to grab a bite to eat.  I went about my business and then another cop showed up and that’s when I knew they weren’t there for food.  A lady who was strung out on something had been there since 6a and it was 8:30a which is a really long time to be at a restaurant.  She had wide mood swings and was drawing on the place mats.  It was a very sad situation to see.  They searched her belongings for drugs and found nothing.  There wasn’t anyone who could come pick her up so the police gave her a ride to the bus station.  I think they have vouchers for a free bus ride and she probably got one of them.  I hope that she made it home safely.  There is a reason why the old time commercial shows an egg and says this is your brain, then the egg gets cracked and thrown in a pan and starts to cook and you hear this is your brain on drugs. 

As I mentioned in my post yesterday drugs were part of my childhood and growing up experience.  I never used them but my mom did and that led my brother down the same path.  They both had done everything short of crack and shooting up.  At one point my brother had a serious cocaine problem.  Both also became highly addicted to pot, which oddly enough is starting to become legal.  I get that medical pot can help people and while I am not a fan I am glad that some folks can find relief.  I have a very strong hatred for drugs because I have seen first hand how they screw up your life.  I’m not saying my mom’s mental health issues were caused by drugs but I do believe if she hadn’t gone down that road there is a better chance that she would still be alive today.  My brother to my knowledge doesn’t do anything illegal but he is puffing away on cigarettes, got one hell of a smokers cough and turns blueish purple from coughing so much.  Then there is beer his other passion.  I really honestly wish I liked the stuff but after the first drink it tastes like shit to me. 

Since were talking about vices, mine is masturbation and sweets.  No one gets out of life alive so I figure might as well be happy.  Speaking of the sweets, my sugar is starting to come into control with the additional dose of medication.  Hopefully, this is a continued trend. 

I haven’t been feeling the best for the last few days and thought that resting would help and it kind of did but not entirely.  So I am flushing my system out with water.  I have drank a lot today and wonder if I will start floating away anytime soon.  I drink a fair amount when I am at work.  However, I stopped buying bottled water at home and started buying more soda.  Yeah it’s not good for you but what is.  So now I am making the choice to fill a water bottle and carry it with me at home.  The bottle made it convenient and cold.  Ice makes it cold now and tap water is just fine. 

There is a screen in one of my front windows that keeps rattling around.  I thought I would fix that and opened the window.  The entire window came off the track and was unexpectedly in my hand.  It took me a few minutes but I put things back together.  I need new windows and that’s not going to happen anytime soon.  Kind of proud of my handy man skills.  Normally I would really panic but I was mildly frustrated but never lost my temper.  The children weren’t too happy about it because it’s damn cold outside and you could for sure feel it inside. 

My evening of TV is about to begin with The Circus on Showtime, Shameless and then Last Week Tonight with John Oliver.  Not sure that I will be able to stay awake for all of it but I am certainly going to try. 

I got an alert for one of our executives at work that their account had multiple lockouts and of course it was at the least convenient time.  I lost an hour dealing with it between research and phone calls.  I didn’t have to do anything but considering who it was, I opted to roll out the white glove treatment.  This person is quick to blow a gasket and had already done so.  I didn’t have to listen to it but this kind of things happens when you wait until the 11th hour to change your password.  He had plenty of warning, we start at 15 days and nag you all the way to the end at which time your locked out if you don’t change it before it expires.  I hate those nags but I have waited a little bit but never let it actually expire.  No one likes changing passwords and it’s a challenge to come up with something you can remember but something no one else would guess.  Passwords are personal in that most people use a birthdate, spouse or kids names, street name and other personally identifiable types of information.  There are some people that I would love to know what their passwords are not because I would use it but just because I am a nosy person. 

Ah well.  On a different note I got my hairs cut.  It was something different for my Sunday routine and it shook things up a little bit.  It was enjoyable but as per usual they charge way too much for a clipper cut.  I thought I would save money and not get a special shampoo but a regular shampoo, turns out it $5 extra no matter what you get for a shampoo.  $5 can buy a small bottle of shampoo, to charge that for 1 shampoo is outrageous.  $3 seems more appropriate but who am I, just the schmuck that pays the bill.  I am thinking of not getting shampoos and just getting a haircut which would be cheaper and then I can come home and wash my own damn hair.  That will be convenient in the spring/summer.  In the winter not so much because I have to have a hat on and those damn hairs get everywhere and I itch like crazy.  I love a good shampoo and there are only a few people in this world that know what they are doing from what I have seen.  I give good head and I mean that in both ways … a shampoo and you know head.  I miss washing my spouses head, he used to enjoy that and it made me feel good because I knew I was helping him. 

Okay so I am starting to ramble.  I’m going to get in front of the TV and get ready to ride this train all the way to bedtime.  Here’s to the week ahead, may it be calm and fast moving.  Stay warm, be safe and we shall talk again soon. 

Gayness

I am not sure why but from time to time I think about being gay.  I wonder if I was tricked into it.  Then I think back to a memory when I was probably around 5 or possibly 4 years old.  I was playing at home and an adult (not sure if it was my mom or grandma) said something about girls giving me cooties.  I distinctly remember responding ick, girls are bad, I like boys.  Then there is the time when I was in grade school (now called middle school) and a very tall kid was at the chalk board (do they still have those, today?) doing a math problem and the room was quiet.  I remember I was sleepy and for some reason felt compelled to yell out dang your really tall.  I remember I was looking mostly at his ass but there was something about his legs. 

Because of these memories I don’t think I was tricked into it, I truly believe 100% that I was born this way.  This is not a choice and it’s not necessarily an easy life but I have learn to accept myself for who I am.  I think back from my childhood through my adult life and I am proud to be who I am. 

Now if I should just find the right man to share my life with I think I know I would be a much happier person.  I kind of think I will be single for a very long time if not for the rest of my life.  I also have my doubts about ever having sex again.  While I know that a good portion of the gay population is about hook-ups, that is not me.  It sounds hot but at the same time you don’t know what your getting yourself into and how an encounter like that can be enjoyable but at the same time have devastating consequences.  All I can do is try to find a boyfriend and if it happens great and if not well then I guess I have to deal with it. 

I do very much remember growing up and how difficult it was.  Kids today I think have it slightly easier because they can come out and a wider majority of the population has a greater acceptance and toleration rate than say when I was growing up. 

I think back to the first time I had sex and how awesome it felt and at the same time how apprehensive I was.  I think of the guy that I had that experience with a lot.  We were childhood friends and we did it more than once.  Although he claimed to be straight and denied that we were having gay sex, he didn’t object.  At first it was not a big deal.  Eventually he got to the point where he didn’t want me to have my eyes open.  I always peeked and was caught a few times.  Those were certainly the good old days.  He had a very common name and therefore is difficult to track but I have tried over the years with no luck.  I’d love to know how his life turned out and I think he would be interested in how mine turned out.

I also remember that I had a secret that I couldn’t tell anyone (I also was a bed wetter for a very long time) because it would change how people treated me.  I remember feeling different.  There is my hair color, the fact that I learned at a different rate than everyone else and then my sexuality.  Wrap all of that up in a neat little bow and I felt like a freak.  Despite the fact that most people thought I would be a looser, I actually turned out damn well.  That’s not to say my life was easy by any means because it wasn’t.  Not only did I not have a normal family unit but I was also physically abused and grew up with a mother who used illegal drugs in front of me, not to mention we went on drug deals together.  There was palpable tension in the air at each deal.  I had a dealer threaten to cut out my tongue if I snitched and guess what I snitched anyway.  I was the kid that you wouldn’t want to play hide and seek with because I my laughing would give away my location every time.  You couldn’t do the wrong thing in front of me because I would always tell.  I’m not sure why I can’t look the other way when people do the wrong thing, but then again I am also glad that I can’t.  I really wish that I would have had a more “normal” childhood but I am thankful for what I experienced because it is what shaped and made me the person I am today. 

I remember wanting to kill myself more than once because life seemed insurmountable and unlivable.  I still have those feelings today from time to time.  When I was younger because growing up seemed way too difficult to accomplish.  Now that I am grown up, it because of the fact that I am all alone and at times it feels like everyone and everything is picking on me.  I tell everyone that my cats are my reason for living, it’s really true because they are the last living memory I have with my late spouse and I also made a commitment to them.  I won’t give up on them or abandon them, it’s not in me.  I do have great concerns about what happens when they all pass away, considering they are older it’s going to happen sooner rather than later.  People tell me I will get another cat and life will go on but I do have my doubts.  My point here is it’s not easy being gay but there are many other people in this world that are attracted to their same sex.  There isn’t anything wrong with that, it’s not sick, twisted or abnormal and it’s not a mental health problem.  It can’t be cured or prayed away.  I did try to pray it away but that didn’t work out.  I always wanted to be “normal” because life seemed to go much better and happier for those that were “normal”.  There is no such thing as “normal” it doesn’t exist.  Just because your attracted to the same sex, doesn’t automatically make you a pedophile or a sicko.  I get that as we get older we want a younger partner it’s mostly about looks which plays a big part in sex and sexuality.  I am actually all about younger but I want my partner to be of legal age and preferably in their 30’s or early 40’s. 

Why am I rambling on about this?  That is a very good question.  I just wanted to put it out there with the hopes that it will help someone.  A couple of common themes I find in being gay is that a lot of us are about helping people and a lot of us have been abused or come from broken families.  It’s a common thread and nothing more.  Vanity/looks are much more important in the gay community that I think of any other community in the world.  Being good looking, thin or muscular will work in your favor, whereas if you are overweight or morbidly obese your chances of finding someone are less.  Also for some silly reason once you turn 30 it’s like you have died in the gay community.  Age is truly only a number.  I still feel like the same teenager I was just older and with some medical and weight issues.  I’ve learned the person inside never, ever changes you will forever see yourself as young and feel like your trapped in an old body. 

Life truly isn’t fair but like any game it’s how you play it that determines the final outcomes.  You live each and everyday, not once like the saying says.  You do only die once.  So each day were all given a new chance to change what it is we don’t like if it’s within our control and most things are, even though they might seem like they aren’t.  Stand tall, be proud of who you are.  Only you know your surroundings best and if you feel comfortable and know it’s safe then come out.  Coming out is a lot like life in that you will do it many times in your life and each time you will get the same funny feeling and have the same apprehension and wonder will this person accept me or will they reject me.  It’s normal.  Being accepted is the very best feeling in the whole world.  Being rejected not so much.  You also have to be careful that people don’t fake you out by pretending to accept you to your face but behind your back they disparage you.  Growing up is scary stuff but hey if I can do it, then anyone can do it.  Be you because you are the best you there is and ever will be and no one else despite how much they try or want to, they can’t be you. 

I was also in therapy in my teenage years.  Oddly enough my therapist was gay.  His partner died suddenly and without warning.  He was devastated but managed to bounce back.  He is the person that told me I am gay, to which I denied it.  I didn’t want to be different.  However, he was right.  I was thinking of him on my commute to work on Friday.  Wondering where he is in the world and how things turned out for him.  He was in his late to mid 40’s when he was helping me.  I remembered being enamored by him and I just wanted to know everything about him, what he liked to eat, what shampoo he used, where he got his haircut, where he lived and I even orchestrated a whammy to get him to drive me home one night after our session, but that didn’t work out in my favor.  I hope that he was able to move on and find love again.  I could try to track him down but I don’t know that it would be worth it.  We did stay in touch for a while, until I had my meeting Jesus experience and then I wanted nothing to do with him.  Now I feel horrible in saying that because in truth there wasn’t anything wrong with him but it was probably better that we didn’t keep in touch.  I am thankful that I had the therapy experience because it helped me to grow and again become who I am today.  Life can be overwhelming at times and there is nothing wrong with therapy or finding someone to talk to in a safe space.  At the end of the day we all want to be loved and accepted.  Something as simple as a hug makes a world of difference. 

While I am hopeful that this has helped someone, I suppose it’s something that I will never know, so I just put this out there and hope for the best.  Thanks for stopping by and reading my rambles, a comment or two or three would be equivalent of a hug for me but don’t feel obligated.  I am not looking to guilt anyone into that.  Be well, be proud and be you!  Love yourself and then you will be able to love others. 

The usual chaos

Ah, thank goodness yet another week has come to a close.  On-call has been really quiet which seems to be a theme lately for not just me but everyone on my team.  I have had 1 call so far this week and considering that I am salaried now that is a good thing.  It wasn’t more than a 10 minute fix.  I love quick and easy when it comes to on-call. 

Friday’s commute home was a little tricky we had snow but our temps were really low so it was melting due to the chemicals and then refreezing causing patches of ice.  I did some fishtailing myself and that was enough of a warning for me to take easier than I already was.  My top speed was 50 on the highway and the low speed was 15.  Thankfully most people left work early because of the experience we had last month.  What that meant for me is not too many people out and while I went slower I was able to get home in a reasonable amount of time. 

My brother called on Thursday evening to tell me once again he broke up with the bimbo.  What a complete shocker that was, not.  I listened to him drone on and on about her and what he went through this time.  Then I told him that if this really wasn’t the last time and he got back with her that I didn’t want to hear about it and we would probably part ways.  It’s exhausting listening to his story of back and forth, when it was obvious that he should have dropped her like a hot potato many, many, many moons ago.  I know I have thought that they were done before but this time does sound different, he changed the locks again and moved out all of her stuff.  He doesn’t want her to have any reason to come over, which makes sense to me.  So hopefully this is the last of that drama. 

My friend that I usually spend the holidays with ventured out last week on Sunday when we had all that ice.  He fell and broke his shoulder.  It sounds like he will need surgery but last I heard that was up in the air.  He’s not real great with communication but he was quick to reach out for sympathy.  While not able to talk on the phone he was able to text and post his issue on social media.  I do hope the best for him, surgery at any age is risky but when you get up in years the risks are more likely to occur. 

My other friend call to tell me that his former sister in law called him and one of his late wife’s kids has been diagnosed with colon cancer.  They have yet to meet with a surgeon but it’s going to happen soon.  That brought back a flood of memories for me.  I feel sorry for the family as well as the person even thought I only met her one time, which oddly enough was at my friends wife's funeral.

What I don’t understand is why the timing for the phone call from my brother and friend couldn’t occur at a different time.  Both nights I had really good porn to watch.  In the case of my brother he yacked so long I was exhausted when I got off the phone so I went to bed.  In the case of my friend, I was able to get him off the phone so that I could get off.  It was a really good scene and well worth my time and expectations. 

No more progress in my sleeping medicine issue.  I gave up and decided to let the mail order pharmacy fill 1 of the drugs and I asked my doctor to call in a long term prescription to a local pharmacy.  Where I will pay the cash price of $50.  I found a savings coupon on-line and will give it a try but I am fully prepared to pay the $50.  Now I am at the mercy of my doctor.  I also pray that the pharmacy will be able to back out the claim for the medicine so that my insurance company has no record of me getting the medicine.  If they know about it then my plan is for not and I will have nothing but problems in getting the second medicine. 

Worked with my doctor’s office to figure out what my new dose on medication is for diabetes.  They some how think I am on 10mg of the medicine when I am actually on 15mg but taking 20mg 1 time daily.  I was told that we can increase to 20mg twice a day.  I am adding in 10mg in the evening with the hopes that will get us more favorable results.  My sugar is way out of whack and it needs to come back into compliance quickly or I will suffer consequences.  

Got my state tax refund this week, which was a complete surprise.  My federal refund will be in next week.  Which is awesome because my car insurance bill came and it went up $65 but I see where I have accident forgiveness, so it doesn’t sound like I will be surcharged for the accident I had late last year.  I am going to clarify that with my agent.  I am also still considering changing vehicles later this year.  It will all depend upon circumstances at the time and if I can swing a lower payment.  I would like to have a model year 2020 of whatever I drive.  The lower payment will be the ultimate goal but even if the payment is the same I am okay.  I just can’t pay more. Stay tuned to find out what happens.  I don’t expect to make a move until August/September which is a ways off.  If I do get a new model year 2019 or 2020 I can tell you with certainty that my auto insurance will go up and that is close to becoming unaffordable for me. 

Saturday was a very lazy day for me.  I didn’t officially get out of bed and get moving until 2p.  I grabbed the mail, stopped at a local Mexican place for a bite to eat, then grabbed cat food and finally had a car wash.  Only to find out that were in store for more freezing rain and snow overnight and through tomorrow.  So much for a clean vehicle.  I guess I should enjoy it while it lasts.  It’s nothing that money can’t buy but I’d like for it to stay clean for a longer period of time.  I am giving consideration to signing up for a monthly car wash club, then I could have it washed as many times as I want.  But it’s another expense and I think it would probably be cheaper to pay by the wash.

I bought a posture correcting brace, it arrived on Wednesday and it was next to impossible to get on, despite the directions.  It was $20 and I sent it back.  I looked a little harder and got a different one that includes lower back support.  It’s difficult to put on mostly because I am fat and it’s not the most comfortable thing to wear but it’s impossible to slouch.  My back actually hurts from wearing it.  I want to see if it helps me or if I should give up and send it back.  This one was $27.  A good indicator will be how I feel tomorrow. 

That’s it for this post.  I’ve got another one I will be working on right after this so you’ll have two to read.  I hope your safe, warm and well.  Take care of yourself and be kind to each other. 

Argh Monday

At least Monday is over with, it wasn’t a horrible day but it wasn’t without issues.  I got a phone call from the mail order pharmacy who explained to me what I already knew about my sleeping medicine.  They told me I could file an appeal, jeez I’ve already been down that road twice.  It’s like insanity with them.  This all happened before my letter was delivered to their president, so I am hopeful that will help further this along.  I am so tired of fighting a 400 pound gorilla.  I am honestly tired of fighting in general, it’s exhausting and really sucks the life out of you and not in a good way. 

My doctors office reached out to me last night about my diabetes and this nurse practitioner thought she would be helpful and suggested a medication that combined two drugs and should really work at helping me.  That sounded great until I looked at the cost and it’s $1,500 for 90 days.  That’s my cost and there is no way in the world I can afford that.  I rejected it and she fired back with we can get it pre-approved.  That’s not the issue, it’s covered but my cost won’t change that is fixed by contract.  I know the manufacturer offers a coupon but with mail order you have to front the cost then apply for the rebate and wait.  I don’t have a spare $1,500 to front.  So this isn’t an option I fired back a little stronger this morning.  Problem here is that there are a plethora of drugs to treat this but the doctors only prescribe what they are marketed because there is an incentive there for them.  If it’s covered and affordable I am fine with that but when it’s not affordable then I am not fine with that.  I’ve done my research and know there are plenty of ways to combat my problem long before we get to injectables but the problem will be trying to get my doctor to play along.  I realize my condition here is directly my fault and that there are dire consequences to pay if it’s not properly controlled but I can’t go bankrupt in the process or that will just tack on more problems instead of solving them.  

It’s been a couple days but over the weekend I pulled out of the dating scene, the apps are gone from my phone and I miss them.  I know I can go back at anytime but thinking your going to meet someone through an app I just think it’s far fetched.  I had a lot of faith in it at first but the longer I have been around the block and the more apps I use, well it just seems like a time waster to me.  That is not to say I am done but I am pausing.  I need to get up the courage to go out into a bar, which isn’t my scene I think that my chances might be better but I don’t want a smoker or a drinker (socially is okay but nothing heavier than that). 

Two people put in there notice today.  One of which I have a major crush on.  He has no idea but outside of my crush, I do enjoy working with him.  He’s smart in addition to being sexy and that is very appealing to me.  He’s also straight and 4 hours away from me.  So there is no point in revealing my feelings.  Seeing people leave causes me to wonder if I am in the right place and given how I have been treated it’s more than temping to look, but I keep telling myself your comfortable, unless something goes horribly wrong or I make a huge fuck up this is essentially guaranteed income.  Problem is when we get comfortable we get complacent and I think that along with some fear of being able to make it is what is holding me back, not to mention the searching, interviewing and rejection.  So for now I will stay put.  Speaking of which it’s time to get in gear and get to it. 

Have a great Tuesday.  Stay warm and I will talk with you again soon!

Liquid Crack

I have found the best tasting diet soda, which is Diet Coke Blueberry Acai.  I have been searching for this for a while and saw an 8 pack of it and I absolutely love it.  I am a freak when it comes to Blueberry anything and can never get enough.  Gerber made a baby food when I was growing up called Blueberry Buckle, I loved it.  Even when I wasn’t a baby.  Sadly it’s no longer made, otherwise I’d be eating it as well.  An 8 pack of this soda isn’t going to last long around me, I have already consumed 3 cans, might need to make a 2nd grocery store run just for this.  Now you know it’s good because I hate the grocery store. 

Woke up to an ice storm and I still managed to get out of the house, stop for breakfast, get groceries and gas.  I thought I was done for the day but then I saw instructions on-line for how to properly flush your hot water heater.  Mine is knocking and has been for a while.  I have previously flushed it but turns out I was doing it all wrong.  Long story short I was using a hose that was connected to my water softener.  As per usual when I was putting it back on the water softener, I over tightened the plastic fitting and it snapped.  I had a small puddle of water on the floor and had to shut off the water in the house.  Went back out to the home improvement store.  I’m telling you I was so lost.  I knew what I wanted but laying it out in understandable terms was next to impossible.  I picked out the closest thing to what I needed but the place where the hose attaches needed to be smaller.  They didn’t have that.  So I took a chance and bought it.  Came home and had to use part of the old part with the new fitting and viola were in business.  I am NEVER touching that hose again.  It doesn’t appear to leak now and there is no reason to remove it.  I will acquire a small hose to be able to drain the water heater in the future.  After following the directions on-line I’m confident that the water heater has been properly flushed but unfortunately it still knocks.  That means I’ll be buying a new water heater sooner rather than later.  For now it still works and there is no reason to panic, that will only cost me more money in the end. 

Jesus after all of that I needed a nap.  I took 45 minutes and it was so worth it.  Then I had to spring into action with house cleaning and finishing up the laundry.  That took up the balance of the afternoon.  Now I have a little time to pass before the good tv comes on and it’s time to call it a day. 

Priced out medication for the kids on-line.  Vet Rx Direct has the cheapest prices for what I need.  So I have to make an appointment for Marv, not just a blood draw but an actual see the vet appointment in order to get new prescriptions.  Then I can just have a blood draw done on Momma, combine the visits or at least schedule them in the same day and I will easily be over the $200 mark, at which point I can use a special credit card and get a 0% loan for 6 months rather than having to part with all of the cash now.  The medicine has to be paid for with a credit card.  I counted out pills and I’ve got about a month before we need to panic. 

The smell in the house has left except for the master bedroom and it’s not occupied so I don’t have a huge concern at the moment.  As the weather gets warmer this could become an issue again but hopefully not.  I’m not ripping up my deck it cost a small fortune to get it added and it was a DYI project so there is plenty of time and labor involved.  I may need someone with a thermal camera to come and scan to see what is under the deck, then figure out how to remove it and finally seal up the tunnels once I am sure nothing living is inside.  That too sounds like a costly little project.  That’s the trouble with home ownership you have to use your money to fix the problems.  Oh joy!

I saw an ad on Facebook about a posture correcting harness.  I looked on Amazon and sure enough they have them.  I hope it helps me and it’s not uncomfortable to wear.  Being hunched over the computer all day really wreaks havoc on my upper back and has for years.  I got one on it’s way along with some cat food, soap and a new don’t bother me sign for my front door and a new belt.  I’m just spending my tax return like I already have money in the bank but trying not to go terribly overboard. 

Speaking of health.  I heard back from my doctor and like I thought he is not happy with my A1C results, they are way too high and have been for quite sometime.  He wanted to add back a drug that caused me severe diarrhea and who knows he may do so in a small dose but hopefully not.  He told me that were getting close to injectables and that my friends is what will motivate me to behave and not consume as much sugar as I do.  I know I am my own worst enemy.  I don’t want to have to stab myself each day, even if it’s a tiny prick ( I hate those, I’m more of a size queen).  There are some coverage issues, you have to buy the medicine usually in pen form and then buy needles to go with it.  You wind up bruising the hell out of your stomach.  My late partner went this route a couple times and hated it.  So I know what I am in for and while my house is loaded with sugar now, I am going to try to taper off and see if I can’t get back to a more normal A1C.  I should hear back from the doc in a day or two.  I did let him know about how I feel and the prior medication he wanted to put me on. 

Another round of freezing rain is moving in overnight for several hours.  So the morning commute could be tricky and this could easily be a work from home type day.  I don’t want to wreck or get hurt but at the same time I am not a wimp when it comes to winter weather.  Driving on ice is very dangerous and usually where I draw the line.  They have closed other offices due to weather but it seems like here it takes a miracle for that to happen and now that I am salaried I probably would have to work from home.  Yet another perk of an hourly employee likely gone.  Then again it’s not everyday that the office shuts down. 

That my friends is all she wrote, at least for this post.  Onward towards the week ahead.  Being on-call and dealing with stupid.  I hope it’s not a horrible week and that it’s over just as quickly as it began.  Stay warm, well and best wishes for the week ahead.  Cheers!

SOMETHING SMELLS BAD

Ø Friday

I managed to roll myself out of bed and take my lazy butt into the office. Even stopped off for gas. It’s bitterly cold outside and that didn’t help with my motivation. I took some extra sleeping medicine Thursday night and that ensured that I would be okay on Friday.

The work day overall was boring but I was also productive and accomplished a few things. I realized one thing I forgot as I was driving home, but hey that’s what next week is for, right?

Ø Sleeping Medicine

Sadly, the fight to get my medication continues. I received a denial email letting me know that they won’t be able to fill the medicine until after I have been out of it for days. I’ve given up on calling Customer Service. You talk with a different person each time, have to get them up to speed and then listen to the different reasoning they can pull out of thin air. I’ve been lied to so much that it’s honestly not worth my time. So, what to do? Fight back with the old school method. What’s that? I sent a certified letter to the president of the mail order pharmacy. I sent a copy of that letter on to my doctor as well as on to the organization that governs my healthcare. This should get me some traction and hopefully bring this bullshit to an end. I called BCBS and followed up with the lady that helped me the other day and gave her permission to call if she wants to argue with them but I told her I am done. My letter according to the post office should be delivered on Monday. Give it time to trickle to the right person and hopefully by this time next week I will have more information.

Ø Saturday

Well it’s the best day of the week. Unfortunately, it’s even colder outside today so that made me want to roll out of bed less. When I woke up it smelled like a skunk sprayed the room. I was by myself and not with any cats. I left the room and as I stepped into the hall way things were normal, then I got to my room and the odor was stronger. I walked to the kitchen and yep same odor. What in the world? The only thing I can think of is one of the Raccoons tangled with a Skunk or possibly killed it – thus the smell. It’s a specific and unique smell. If I am wrong then something is rotting outside or it’s the odor of raccoon feces. They are still huddled up under my deck and I’m fine with that. Just don’t bring problems to my property. I won’t call the city to trap them and I won’t harm them. Especially because I know they have babies. I’m not sure how they managed to get through the subzero snap we had but hey they are still here. Or did one of them not make it? I have been burning candles all day long and the house smelled great. I blew out the candles and went out for pet food. When I came back which was less than 20 minutes, the odor was wafting back through the house. I walked outside my house and outside of sticks and some small tree limbs, nothing stood out. I could smell the same odor outside as I did inside, so I know it’s not my imagination. I just hope it doesn’t get worse and doesn’t adversely affect me or my cats. If that happens then I’m left with no choice and will have to act. Until then I am just praying it goes away.

I pulled the trigger and filed my taxes today. Wow, they get you coming and going. Cost me $119 but I should be getting a credit because of the credit card I used, so say hello to $20. My refunds should be in quickly since it’s still early. Once they arrive, I will send my check off to my state to pay them off. Until that happens, they will just have to wait their turn, like I have to wait for my money.

I also pulled the trigger and killed off my yahoo email account. I migrated the account to a new account and the only thing that has been coming for months now is junk mail. Given their massive data breach and the fact they overhauled the application and now want to charge $35 per year for it was enough fuel to make me say its time for you to go.

Went out for breakfast and shouldn’t have. It was a horrible experience at IHOP. I got sat close to the door so the cold air kept hitting me. I have no idea if they even had the heat on. The syrup on the table was frozen and wouldn’t pour. I tried more than 1 bottle. I did get to see some hotties but honestly it wasn’t worth it. The waitress called me dear, honey and sweetie. None of which I was to her. It took a while to get my food and once it arrived it was full of salt and my eggs weren’t cooked fully to my liking but it was edible, just not enjoyable. I let them know about it and told them I wouldn’t be coming back at least not to that particular IHOP.

Got my first ever dental bill in the mail. They only want pennies for what wasn’t paid for my cleaning. They have yet to charge me for the repair of my tooth last year. I know exactly what I owe them but if they want less, I am happy to send that. Make them send two bills, it’s not like they can’t afford the postage for the amount of money they are charging.

Got my first contactless credit card in a while. All of my cards require swiping or inserting. This has an RFID chip in it so you can scan it and go. So can criminals. Thankfully I don’t carry this card with me. I use it sparingly for paying bills and it never leaves the house, so I think I am safe. I don’t like RFID cards due to the theft risk. I think we need to go chip n pin like they have in Europe that would combat credit card fraud. Apparently, the chip is no longer required because someone found a way to hack that, so much for security.

Ø The cats

Marv is still chowing down to this day. I think he is out of the woods at least for now. I need to get his blood work done and get some more medicine for him. His IBS really destroys his stomach and I feel so sorry for him.

Gator is living up to her name each and every day. She took a nap with me today and when I woke up, she didn’t hesitate to climb up on my chest. She loves to squish the hell out of my balls, that shit hurts and I keep telling her about it but I don’t think she understands.

Momma is as sweet as ever and I don’t understand why but she still to this day lets the kids eat first unless she is extremely hungry.

They all know they are loved and that I will move Heaven & Earth for them. They keep me on a tight leash and forever seem to need food, attention, cuddling – it’s always something. That keeps it interesting. I got to see them all around me today napping while I was playing on my phone. They are so angelic and sweet when they are asleep.

Ø Winter

Well winter is still here. Were under another Winter Weather Advisory that starts in a bit. Were going to get a small amount of snow but then it’s followed by rain, which will turn to ice quickly. So, getting out in the morning might be tricky. Sad thing is the same thing is going to happen tomorrow night so Monday mornings commute might be difficult, maybe I’ll get to work from home. I’d just as soon as have all of the ick pass us by. I love snow but hate ice with a passion the only place that belongs is in a glass. I’d love it if we got dumped on again with 12 inches of snow say mid-week to make it impossible to get out for at least 1 day. That to me would be enjoyable. I want spring to come but at the same time I am thankful for winter. Reason being is that I need to have yard work done. Bush trimming and clean up of all of the sticks and limbs that fell. That won’t be cheap. Then I will have to also deal with trying to find a new lawn cutter and that won’t be fun either. It’s just part of life for me.

I hope that your all warm, cozy and that life is treating you well. Were only into the second month of the year. Ten more months to go before were back to the end again. I’m not excited for 2019 but I am excited for 2020, I think it will be a cool year and hopefully we will have some great advances in technology. Well that brings yet another post to a close. I will talk with you again soon.

Lies

So were back to my sleeping pill issue again.  Turns out faxing in new prescriptions didn’t do the trick, the system thinks that I still have refilled both prescriptions too soon.  Long story short I’m getting 1 medication for sure with a 60 day supply, that should be here within a week.  The other medicine is under review and I might get a 60 day supply of it if this goes through.  Thankfully now I have a point of contact at BCBS to be able to keep in touch with so we can get this sorted.  I don’t understand what the fucking big deal is about sleeping pills.  You get a valid prescription, you fill the prescription there is no fuss or muss about it.  Life can be easy or complicated and in this case my pharmacy benefit manager is choosing the complicated method for me.  By the time were done with this I’ll need new blood pressure medicine if I don’t have a stroke or heart attack. 

My brother called last night.  More drama in the relationship department.  Turns out him blocking her really upset her so she had others reach out for her to him to get herself unblocked.  Her Dad or mom’s husband, whatever has some medical issues and is in the hospital.  It sounds like he’s not going to make it.  So that pulled them back together for a short term.  Then she told him she had plenty of guys interested in her and that sealed her fate with my brother or so I am told.  Now they are really done, for sure, I mean it this time.  Fuck I told him that this was getting exhausting for me and that I can’t take much more before I have to distance myself.  I told him that he is calling me for help and I provide advice but he doesn’t listen.  So this time I got him to promise me that they were for sure done, he is changing the locks again.  He is going to block her again.  If people start harassing him he will look at blocking them as well.  He really needs to relocate and start fresh in a new city.  He doesn’t have to leave the immediate area but honestly it would be the best thing for him.  I know that he will be staying put for now.  A co-worker told him to kick her son out as well.  He is one more tie to her and he really needs to eliminate any and all ties to her.  This is heavily toxic and the sooner they break it off the sooner he can heal.  I don’t give a shit about her, never liked her from day 1 and don’t like her now.  I told my brother that if I had a sugar daddy or someone that was helping me financially outside of giving me sexual satisfaction, I certainly wouldn’t treat him like she has treated him.  I mean he was a big old sponge full of money and he’s spent a lot on her and this is the thanks he gets.  I say good riddance!

In other news, I called in today.  I haven’t been sleeping well and I woke up very tired.  I figured I’d take a day lounge and bounce back tomorrow.  It’s been a grand day and I have enjoyed myself.  I had my electronic leash near by and that has pissed off the kids but it beats going back to a full in box.  Most of the BS I get I deleted and no action is required.  There were somethings that need my attention.  So I really need to go back and since it’s Friday 1 day shouldn’t kill me.  Then I get 2 days off and were back on for 5 more.  Not fun but it is what it is.  I’d love to retire and not have to work but that is way down the road.  Things could be better if the stupidity at work was gone.  An extra perk would be more money, no matter how much I get I always want more.  Just like dick and potato chips. 

Hopefully that put a smile on your face.  I’m headed up to take in some TV and spend more time with the children before bed time rolls around.  Sleeping won’t be easy tonight but I’ll try to make it happen with some extra medicine.  Worst case is that I will limp through tomorrow.  Working from home is an option but I don’t want to use that unless it’s truly needed.  Cheers that were closer to the weekend!  Hope all is well in your world. 

A Better Day

Marv is eating a lot more today than he was yesterday.  Got to love that appetite stimulant, it works.  Plus the fluids I gave him, I don’t know if were out of the woods but things are better than they were yesterday.  I will have to keep an eye on him and see how things fair through the weekend. 

I found out that I had false hope about stupid at work getting fired, there was something else that was brewing that needed attention.  My boss called me today and was all fired up about stupidity in general and I wanted to turn the tables on him so bad and say now you know how I feel about my co-worker and all of the bullshit I have to clean up.  However, I didn’t I just let him vent and then did what he told me to do.  It invoked an email storm but thankfully things have quieted down. 

All of the good TV comes on at 9p tonight and that doesn’t help me.  That’s usually when I am waiting for my sleeping pills to kick in.  I didn’t get a good nights sleep last night either.  Had an occasional recurring nightmare about going back to a former job.  When I woke up I was so happy it was not reality and that I had my same job as when I went to bed. 

Figured I would spend a little time on the keyboard.  Now it’s up to clean up after the furry family and sit and find something to watch as they all compete and vie for my attention.  I hope all is well in your world.  It’s back to winter here but at least it’s not negative degree weather, it’s just regular old winter.  Talk again soon, cheers!

Cat a strophe

Marv is doing a number on me.  His appetite has slowed way down over the last couple days.  He nibbled this morning.  Tonight I figured he would chow down but no such luck.  He did eat a little bit but I had to coax him to get him going.  While he isn’t dehydrated I gave him a little bit of fluids to hopefully help him perk up a bit.  I also am giving him an appetite stimulant, it’s a very tiny pill and you can only give it every 3 days.  I hope that I can get him on the mend and back to eating like he was.  I think he is playing me to see how many cans of food I will actually open but that doesn’t seem to matter.  I’ve been throwing away a lot of food lately.  I’d rather throw the food away than pay a vet bill because it’s cheaper but I want a normal cat.  He’s older as are the others.  Gator is the only one in the house that isn’t on medicine.  Her appetite is super strong he eats enough for two cats, which would explain why she is so fat.

I am worried as you can well imagine.  I kind of see the road were headed down and I don’t like the route, so I am trying to get things changed.  I am hopeful for a permeant change but right now cautiously optimistic.  I sure hope that things change course and Marv bounces back. 

Work is hell.  Monday was like 5 days rolled into 1.  I had so much catchup for taking 2 days off.  Plus there were fuck ups that stupid made.  I came in this morning and it was in my face that he made another one.  That just enraged me.  Combined that with Marv’s issue and I was in no mood to be fucked with.  My boss happened to call this morning and I gave him an ear full.  I don’t know anything for sure but given the way the afternoon shook out I think stupid might be on his way out the door, not 100% because I have had similar signs before.  I just want a teammate that I don’t have to babysit and keep after.  I don’t think that is asking too much.  This bullshit has been going on for over a year now and I’ve pretty well had my fill.  I’m close but not quite at the point where I issue an ultimatum.  I realize that could go sideways really fast but I kind of need the nightmare that this is to end, it’s not beneficial for me or the organization.  Like I said I am close, hopefully it doesn’t come to that. 

Well I’ve said my peace now.  Up to deal with trash and spend more time with Marv.  He’s slept with me the last 2 nights, I’m talking all night long and that is unusual as well.  I know he is very comfortable around me and he enjoys my company, so if I can bring him some peace and comfort why not.  Anything to get him to bounce back to a state of normal. 

Hope all is well in your world.  Talk again soon.  

Taxes

I figured out tonight that I am ready to file my taxes.  I got through it online and I am getting a whole lot less back this year than last year.  So much for tax reform.  I haven’t filed yet because there is a small chance an additional form could come trickling in.  Presuming that doesn’t happen with in the next week or two, I will pull the trigger and get them filed.  What sucks is that I owe my state $233, the good news is I can file now but don’t have to pay until the 15th of April.  I won’t wait that long, as soon as my Federal Refund comes in, I will get them paid.  One less bill to worry about.  I normally look forward to tax time but now I am starting to dread it a bit.  Financing a home used to give you some additional tax breaks but eh not so much now. 

Wondering what I did today?  Well it took forever to roll out of bed but by 10a the kids had me up and going.  They got fed at 7a but I went back to bed.  Every place I went to try to eat was crowded.  I settled on Bob Evans and it was a good choice both for my stomach and my eyes.  There was lots of eye candy and I was so happy I made the trip. 

Hit up the Hallmark store to get a card for my sick co-worker.  Then over to Target to get some soap but they didn’t have what I want.  Why is it that stores will tease you by putting out something new and then once it sells out they no longer carry it.  I am looking for Dial Gold with Marula Oil.  This is a liquid soap used to wash your hands.  It smells oh so good.  I also grabbed the mail and sent my letters on their way.  Back home for a while.

I thought waiting would help some of the crowds dissipate but it didn’t work.  We got up to 60 degrees today and everyone came out of hibernation.  I got in a nap and then went back out.  Hit up the Hair Care store and dropped $76.  It’s a dangerous place for me to go, I usually drop $50 minimum.  Then over to get some cat food.  Then out to a new Mexican place.  It was okay, they brought me a glass that was a small pitcher.  I only had 1 soda but damn it was like a Big Gulp on Steroids.  Nice way to hydrate and not have to worry about refills.  Then back home but first I stopped at a car wash.  There was a line and I just gave in.  Now the crud is gone and it’s all shiny again.  Monday the rain comes in again so it will be short lived. 

I put all my receipts in my checkbook and did a good job of spending money.  I honestly tried to talk myself out of the haircare stuff but I didn’t budge.  I take care of everyone else and for once it’s time to take care of me.  I mean I have the money it’s not like I am going into debt for it. 

Drained the Hot Water Heater again for good measure.  It’s not something that I do on a regular basis so I am trying to make up for lost time.  Let’s hope it works. 

That’s it, my day is complete.  Now momma is after me to come upstairs because it’s way past our normal bed time but tomorrow is my last day off and this is my last night to stay up.  I am tired but really want to try to savor freedom because it is so short lived.  Monday will be here before you know it and it will be back to the old bump and grind.  Lots of BS to take care of since were into a new month.  Reports is the name of the game and I so hate them. 

I guess I’m giving into momma, at least we can watch TV.  Grocery store and Gas tomorrow and then house cleaning and finishing up on laundry.  A nice lazy day at home.  No I won’t be watching the super bowl and I don’t care who wins.  Just please lord let there be some chips and lunch meat in the store. 

Hope all is well in your neighborhood.  Take care of yourself and enjoy what is left of the weekend.  Talk again soon. 

Time for a drink

I’m not sure what it is about pharmacies and me, but as of late we are not getting along at all.  You heard my sleeping pill woes in an earlier post.  My doc dent over new scripts as I was told and thus far they are in the ether.  I have to check back tomorrow to see if they have shown up. 

Today’s bigger problem is with Sudafed.  Now I know it’s used to make meth but I’ve got year round allergies and w/o this medicine life is uncomfortable at best.  I found a website that issues discount coupons.  I printed out a coupon and took that along with a script to my pharmacy this morning.  I was away for 5 minutes when they called me and said they couldn’t fill it.  I had to come back to get the document I dropped off and the coupon.  So I went in the afternoon to a different pharmacy, they played along until the script got to the pharmacist.  She didn’t want to fill the prescription.  She asked me what department I saw yesterday.  I said my PCP, she said oh you should take this every day, there are new protocols for treating allergies.  Do you take anything else, I said yes.  She called the doctors office in front of me and I knew already he had the day off.  She was trying to get them to void the prescription and they wouldn’t do that w/o talking with the dr.  I explained to her after she hung up that she had a valid prescription and I wanted her to fill it.  She declined so I said give it back to me, she did.  Off to yet another pharmacy to start the bullshit all over again.  So turns out they did fill the script and I had to pay full retail price.  The coupon I had was the problem, they can’t honor that because it’s for a specific NDC of drug and they don’t carry it and won’t order it.  FUCK.  To say I was furious was an understatement but I did get the medicine. 

I left the 3rd pharmacy and headed straight to Red Lobster.  I got a Pina Colada along with my Crab Alfredo and came home.  I have written the pharmacy’s headquarters as well as the coupon people’s headquarters, voicing my concerns and asking each of them to reimburse me as if the coupon was honored.  My hope is that 1 of them will give.  If they both give then hey I am money ahead.  I didn’t realize it but the price of stamps went up as well. 

I also got interrupted by work to take care of an access card issue.  It could have waited until Monday but everyone knows if you call me, I will jump in.  Next time I am off I am turning my phone off, that will prevent all calls and text messages.  I’m going to tell them I am taking time for me and can’t be disturbed for any reason or under any circumstance.  Fuck were all entitled to vacation and time away.  I don’t live and breath my job until I am actually at my job.  The part that sucks is I can’t charge for the interruption.  I was remoted in last night taking care of some promotions and noticed that stupid forgot to process a departure, so I tattled on him.  Fucking moron I wish he would pull his head out of his ass, I really hate working with the incompetent son of a bitch. 

The good news is that I got in some cuddle time with Marv.  We even laid in bed together but he left me pretty quickly.  I also got in a nap, went to sleep alone and woke up with a gator.  That is not unusual. 

I have plenty more errands to run but I also have a tomorrow, so I am in luck.  I’m going to make a list now so I don’t forget anything.  Getting upset isn’t exactly good for the memory.  I hope that tomorrow will be frustration free and the same for Sunday.  I need to get my vehicle washed but all of the car washes have lines.  Thinking of going back to the dealer, they offer free washes for life and it would save me a line, but they don’t exactly do a standup job.  I was by there today when I went to eat but since I had what I think of as gold (aka the medicine) in the car, I didn’t want to take any chances.  We shall see how the washes fair tomorrow.  One way or another I need a clean vehicle since there has been so much salt and chemicals on the road.  It looks like hell and I’m all about clean & shiny!

Here’s hoping that life is treating you well.  I’ll talk with you again soon.  Up to be with the kids and fall asleep.  Cheers!