Virtual Kidnapping – Scam

Last night I was watching The Doctors and learned of a new scam.  You get a call from someone who claims to have kidnapped a relative of yours.  They put a person on the phone that is the gender of the relative they supposedly kidnapped and then they demand money from you.  In reality your relative is safe and sound and no kidnapping has actually taken place.  Apparently people have fallen for this and paid the ransom.  It strikes me that I would try to find the whereabouts of my relative before I even considered paying ransom.  Law Enforcement is investigating this but I thought of my readers when I heard of the scam and wanted to alert you to it.  

Consolidation

So I was thinking about it and did some looking last night.  It makes total sense to get a consolidation loan, I will get a lower interest rate and payments are fixed over 3 years, however there is no penalty for paying the thing off early which is in my plans.  I applied last night and am waiting for the loan to fund, hopefully in a few days I will have the money and can pay off my credit cards.  I took out a little extra just in case something else crops up.  That extra money can sit in the bank and earn interest.

I also wrote the old mortgage company and demanded my escrow refund.  I filed a complaint with a regulatory agency in the hopes that would help pressure them into refunding my money.  The next step is to send them a certified letter that says if I don’t get my money by x date that I will file suit.  I will most likely prepare and mail the letter over the weekend and give them a hard and fast deadline.  That way if I don’t get my money I can file suit on one of my days off, instead of having to take time from work.  Honestly I would rather not have to sue them – just give me my money and I promise you will never, ever hear from me again.  I’m looking for a clean break.  They claim to have mailed me a small check almost a month ago but that check has never surfaced.  I sense it’s not coming OR they mailed the money to my late partners Bankruptcy Attorney.  However, if that were the case he would have reached out to me because legally he can’t cash the check.  Let’s hope for positive results, fingers crossed. 

I stopped by the pet store last night and picked up some spray by Bissell that said it was no scrub – just spray, let it sit and blot up.  Then when it’s all dry vacuum up and viola stain and odor gone.  If only it was that simple.  The odor seems to be gone but the stain, well that is still there.  It’s funny in that it almost looks like a kitten is monogrammed into the carpet.  I saw a guy that I have a crush on (who is a little young for me) but the guy who I met via Grindr well he wasn’t there.  No biggie.  I did some research and turns out it is recommended to clean up urine from carpets with COLD water.  Hot water or STEAM actually can set the odor in the carpet.  Who knew? 

Last night I was all set to break out the carpet cleaner but I was way too tired.  It was raining here and I had major traffic to deal with.  I was really wiped out and just couldn’t wait to get to bed.  I was asleep for an hour when my sleeping buddy (Marvin) woke me up because he wanted out of the room.  I didn’t know it but he just went to the bathroom on the floor.  I got up to let him out and you guessed it, I stepped in it.  I cleaned up my foot and by then he was ready to go back to bed.  I left the mess to deal with in the morning, that is just how tired I was.  I woke up early this morning before the alarm which is typical.  I am so tired.

The good news is I ordered new Gel Pillows and a Mattress Pad for myself.  I am sure that I will sleep better once both of these items come in this week.  UPS is scheduled to be at my house every day this week from today until Thursday.  So I will have something to look forward to each night when I get home, besides the furry beasts waiting for their grub 

When I finally was able to sit down to relax, I looked at TIVO and saw that I recorded a show on LOGO called STUDlebrity.  It’s about young guys who are gay, good looking and have chosen to use YouTube to broadcast their lives.  There is monetization with YouTube and some guys are making enough money to not have to be employed.  That is kind of cool.  Mark & Ethan were in there so I had to tune in to see what they had to say.  The term STUDlebrity comes from your good looking (stud) your almost famous (have a lot of followers – YouTube).  Interesting term.  I have wanted to have some form of a broadcast interaction with the world at large and YouTube is a great platform.  The problem is I really don’t want to put my face out there for the world to see.  I am not looking for fame, even though it does sound slightly appealing.  I want to talk about different topics, not necessarily broadcast my entire life.  I wouldn’t mind sharing my story but I don’t want to lament on what has happened.  Writing my book has helped get some of that out there.  I have thought of things that I should have published ever since.  I eventually suspect that I will modify the book to correct the mistakes that are there and perhaps add content and publish it as a different volume.  I am not in a hurry to do that.  As I mention in my book, me and my late partner came together over a shared interest in Amateur Radio  I used to see him with his equipment and talking with friends.  I watch Podcast and a Live Radio Show over the weekend and then watch YouTube videos – it’s no wonder why I want to get out there.  Making money from it well that is just an added plus, but I am not looking for the money.  My goal is to just talk and try to help people who are going through similar situations as mine.  Be it a consumer issue, a sexuality issue, or a life issue in general.  I just thought not putting my face out there is one thing, but if certain people hear my voice they will no doubt know who I am.  The biggest thing that is holding me back is the fear of rejection or being mocked.  YouTube people talk about negative comments all the time and well I don’t have time for that in my life.  Positivity yeah we can talk all day long.  Negativity I’ve spent my life embroiled in it and I am sick to death of it, so it’s time for a channel change!  Got an idea on how I can accomplish my goal?  Leave me a note in the comments.  I respect privacy and if you don’t want something published, say so and I promise I will be the only one who sees is (unless of course Google is spying on me). 

This afternoon I have to go through Diversity Training.  Really?  I mean with my make up I think I am well trained already.  However, I will do it because it occupies an hour of my time and work is paying for it.  So why not?  It also is an excuse to take a nap, which is more than likely what will happen.  Meetings that are boring just lull me to sleep and there isn’t anything I can do about it.  My body just has no tolerance for boring.  Sooner or later that will cause problems for me  A friend of mine tells me stand up, tell them you have a leg cramp and just walk around a little to wake yourself up.  Yeah, that is one method.  The other method is just tape my eyes open. 

I was talking with a co-worker who is unhappy, I really hate hearing her stories.  Her problem seems to be centered around 1 person in her department.  She is letting this person run her off.  She is looking for a new job and I am sure that she will find something eventually.  She was in government before coming here so I am sure that it will just be a matter of time before the right wheel is greased and presto she is out of here.  I wish her all of the happiness in the world.  She is talking about making more money.  I told her that money is nice but its much better to be able to relax at work and just be yourself.  Lord knows I feel 10,000 times better since I have been able to relax and don’t have to constantly worry about an ogre yelling at me or firing me.  It was to the point I was just paranoid all the time.  Plus to my knowledge I don’t have fake people here that pretend to be my friend to my face but talk crap about me behind my back or twist my words  Peace of mind is one of those priceless things in life that you can’t put a price on.  Hearing my co-worker I can only imagine how I sounded.  I know people don’t want to hear that crap but everyone needs someone to vent to.  I don’t mind listening and who knows maybe I can give you a tip or two. 

Well that’s all I know for now.  Thinking about supper and I have no idea what I am going to eat.  I know that I won’t go hungry.  I just hope that I enjoy whatever it is I have and that the commute tonight is much smoother than last night  We have true winter weather in the forecast for later this week, just in time for the weekend!  Wee.  It won’t stop me, might slow me down a little but stop me – nah.

Have a great Tuesday and I will talk with you peeps later. 

Ye Old Update

I am done with on-call, thank the Lord above.  It honestly wasn’t terrible and I got the bulk of my calls last night from 1 person who just couldn’t manage to save documents to the system properly.  I finally was able to get to bed at 11:30p so I feel pretty much okay today, slightly tired but with the rain outside I think that helps factor into to how I feel.  Getting done with on-call makes me feel like I have my life back and I can do what I what when I want without any worries and I don’t have to be a slave to my phone.

Tonight I will be headed to the pet food store, need to pick up some chemicals for the rug.  I cleaned it over the weekend and that is an invitation to Bear to pee again.  So my hope is that if I can get it clean or at least get the bulk of the smell gone that might help.  I also broke down and ordered him pee pads – I just can’t keep this rhythm going.  It’s like insanity.  He saw me clean the litter box so he knew it was empty and I put fresh litter in but he just refused to use it.  I think he is just being lazy.  He comes over to me when I am on the couch and wants attention.  He loves it when I brush him.  He of course is eating and I still have to rotate his plate and last night we played before he decided to pee.  So that is why I think he is being lazy and that this isn’t a cry for help.  Perhaps I am wrong and if so I will feel horrible but there doesn’t appear to be a blockage because he goes like a gallon at a time, at least that is the way it appears to be.  I am not quite sure how to break him of this awful habit.  The carpet will be staying around for a while, so I have to think of something.  I guess it’s time for a Google or two.

I took some self photos of me to update my profile picture on the various dating websites.  I posted them and got some responses.  I found a younger guy who I gave some advice to on his profile.  He wanted to meet up, but I didn’t encourage that.  I just spoke friendly to him and he disappeared like vapor.  So I was thinking about it and last night I did it.  I dropped out of every site I was on.  Now I am not sure what purpose there is to life.  There is no question I was addicted to checking my phone to see if I had messages or if there was a cute guy that had joined up.  I am in withdrawals, but I am going to try to make it.  I will probably wind up going back but taking a break sounded like a healthy thing to do.  The quality of the guys is sub-part and most are looking to get their rocks off.  Now I want to get mine off as well but I know how to take care of myself.  I am after all addicted to gay porn.  So with that said, what I want more than anything is a companion and if things blossomed beyond that well great.  If not then I can always fall back on old faithful (i.e. porn).  I know there is a guy waiting out there for me but the problem is finding him and then knowing that he is the one.  Not sure how or when it’s going to happen but my eyes and mind are still open. 

Speaking of pet food, I went over this weekend and the guy was no were in sight.  I may see him tonight and if things are right I will ask him.  I kind of think that he was just being nice and telling me that he was interested because he didn’t want to hurt my feelings especially with what I have been through.  If that is truly the case then I wish he would be up front and say something, instead of stringing me a long and giving me false hope.  I mean it’s going to hurt either way but there is a way to make it hurt less by being honest. 

I was surprised this morning when I got up to have a message from an old family friend that I came out to when things were at their lowest point earlier this year.  I figured he wouldn’t talk with me anymore, but he did.  He just asked how things were going.  I wrote him back before starting on this post.  That felt pretty good.

Yesterday I felt the need to do some cleanup on my friends on FaceBook.  I got rid of a few people.  One lady in particular I used to work with I told her I was gay and ever since then it’s kind of been hands off.  We did get together for a bite to eat.  Then she asked me to help with some computer stuff but never made the time for me to come over.  She promised me the world but just never delivered.  I sent her my late partners left over hearing aid batteries by mail and never even so much as got a thank you or any acknowledgement that she received them.  I’ve been wanting to unfriend her for a while but just haven’t been able to do it.  Last night I was sitting looking at her profile and was nervous but I did it.  That helped me continue on with the process.  Now it’s never a good day to lose a friend but if this really bothers her, then she should be reaching out via e-mail or phone saying hey what happened, I noticed were not FB friends anymore.  I don’t have a lot of friends.  I have had my fair share of people who masquerade as friends but in time I figure out they are phony and drop them like a hot potato.  I could use more true friends and less phonies who just want to take me for a ride and use me for what they can get out of me.  If you are a friend then I am happy to help when and where I can – I am very guilty of putting others before myself.  I realize that I have to come first so I am working on making an adjustment to that. 

I have managed to pay off my car, the payment is scheduled but it’s not official until later this week.  I should have the title by the end of the year, which will be nice!  Now I own 2 automobiles and when the timing is right I will be trading them in for something new  I have done Christmas shopping for myself and got a fitness tracker.  It doesn’t look like it will be here until Wednesday.  The thing I like about it is that you decide how you want to wear it as a clip on or as a watch, plus you can take it off and press a button it will give you a pulse ox reading which I think is uber cool.  It’s called Withings Pulse O2 Activity, Sleep, and Heart Rate + SPO2 Tracker for iOS and Android.  It was $100 which I think is a fair price to pay.  Plus I got the rollers for the garage door as well as some OTC medicine that I take along with pee pads and dropped a fair amount of money. 

My next big goal is to try to get out of debt.  I have thought about taking a consolidation loan out and am already pre-approved, but there is a huge fee for taking out the loan and the interest rate is slightly less than what I am paying on my credit cards.  The good news is that the payments would be fixed to a specific time period and there is no fee for paying it off early.  I honestly think I could make a go of it but I am trying to avoid it because it’s more credit.  I don’t want to take it out and then have a need where I have to run my credit cards back up again.  Things are starting to look up and I think if I can just hang on a little longer that the money situation will clear up.  If I could get rid of this bankruptcy that would also help out a lot.  Next year should be my year. 

So goals for 2015 .. Get rid of his bankruptcy.  Get out of debt and build savings.  I don’t make resolutions because they always get broken.  I think those goals are attainable but they won’t come without some serious work and sacrifice on my part.  I am already starting to pay cash for things, which is a step in the right direction.  They say that if you file Bankruptcy one time, you are destine to file it again because you won’t fix your mistake.  Yeah my mistake before was that I used credit for everything and lived way beyond my means.  I have curbed that and understand the pitfalls now.  The best and only way to use credit cards is to pay them off in full each month.  Something I had been able to do until I started this new job and ran up a nice tab, had to get a desktop and then treated myself to a laptop – so it was a trap and I feel into it.  However, I am not so far in that it is impossible to find a way out.

It was a slightly relaxing weekend.  I have Chicken Salad Sandwiches all week long and Fritos Twisted Honey BBQ Corn Chips to munch on.  I am pretty happy about that.  I tried some Vegan, Kosher Chocolate Peanut Butter Cup Gelato and well I’d really prefer the regular stuff.  It’s okay but it tastes like it’s missing something.  I am not a health food person and certainly not a vegan, I love to eat meat (yes that has a double meaning :) ).  Tonight supper will be left over Tombstone Pizza.  Then I get the fun of cleaning the rug and taking the trash out, prepping for Tuesday and coming back to work to do it all over again.  Hard to believe that once we make it through this week that Christmas is next week and I only have to work 3 days, well 2 1/2 I suppose if they let us go early. 

I hope that you had a great weekend and that the week ahead is pleasant and uneventful.  I will talk with you peeps later.  Take care!

Friday

Were getting even closer to Monday!  Last night I stayed late for coverage, we didn’t get any calls of course.  Then fought traffic to make it home with 5 minutes to spare.  I got 2 calls but they were later in the evening, while I was relaxing.  I was able to sleep until 2am when someone sent me an e-mail that woke me up.  Thankfully I was able to go back to bed and here we are with life as I know it.

Today has been crazy printer and dictation issues have consumed my day thus far.  I hope that what is left of the day is smooth sailing because I would like a break.  I have told myself that I am getting McDonald’s tonight.  It’s something I have been craving and I haven’t had in a very long time.  So looking forward to a Double Quarter Pounder with Cheese and some fries with lots of Ketchup.  The children will no doubt beg but it’s all mine!

We are taking up a collection at work for our cleaning lady who witnessed one of her relatives get murdered in broad day light.  Having lost many people in my life I can tell you that the gesture will no doubt be appreciated and will quite probably send her over the edge with being so thankful.  In exchange for giving you can wear jeans.  I never participate in these events but I did today.  However, I am not wearing jeans but I do have pants on!  :)

I’ve been thinking about the on-line dating thing and have been giving serious consideration to taking a break from it for a while.  I haven’t gotten the desired results and with the holidays coming it’s kind of depressing.  I haven’t committed to the idea just yet, still tossing it around.  I did update my profile photo in the hopes that it will garner some guys attention.  I kind of feel like a slave to it in that I am compelled to constantly check to see if there is someone interested in me.  I feel the same way about FaceBook but I haven’t given it up.  I suppose we all have become addicted to staying in the know.  With the advent of cell phones and instant almost anything it’s no wonder why.

I pray for a quiet weekend and that I am allowed to get Cat Food, Groceries, The Mail and maybe even a bite or two to eat.  Without having to worry about being on-call.  The week is bad but the weekend is way worse in my book.  Soon it will all be over and life will go back to normal.

I posted my question about the escrow account and the former lender on an on-line forum.  I asked for what the law said.  The response I got back from an attorney said there is no time limit, it varies by lender.  If you want to force their hand, file suit.  Yeah that is great but if there is a law that is on their side then I would look like a fool and would be doomed to losing.  So I responded your telling me there is no law on this, right?  I am interested in the response I get.  Someone is lazy and just doesn’t want to look it up.  Little do they know I already have someone doing exactly that.  I am trying to put some speed into getting my results.  The quicker I know the answer the quicker I can go after these people  I want to get my money as fast as I can.  The $50 check they said they sent last month still has yet to show up.  I can only imagine that I will have to play games to get my money.  They just want to fuck with me one last time, because they can.  I am not above suing them, but really hope that I don’t have to go that far.  That will be added expenses and time.  Just fork over what is mine and I can promise you that I won’t give you any trouble.  Hold on to it and were going to do battle until someone gives up and that won’t be me, I am persistent, especially where money is involved.  Like a dog with a bone!  We all know I took on a Large Union and I am not afraid of a little mortgage company that thinks they are hot stuff.  I was researching them yesterday on-line and there are complaints in the thousands against them.  They were even sued by a Federal Judge and his wife.  Clearly they need to be put out of business but not until they fork over my money.  It’s like my loan officer said there is a special place for them in hell.  I believe that. 

Well back to work.  I hope you all have a great weekend and I will talk with you peeps later. 

Telephone Day

Yesterday I was able to leave early and arrived home to find the repairman waiting in my driveway.  Nice!  The not so nice part was standing in the cold while he fixed the door.  He did it with the door open and said it was easier that way.  We talked the entire time he was working and I learned a little bit.  I also found out that I am due for rollers on the garage door.  He told me how to replace them so I may give it a go, I found some decent replacements on Amazon last night.  He said to stay away from big box hardware stores because they usually carry Chinese products and they are inferior.  He also upgraded the spring to one size larger and said that it would last longer.  With springs you don’t go by years, but rather by usage.  So the more you use the door the closer you come to breaking a spring.  Too bad there isn’t a lifetime spring that one could purchase.  Then the best part he asked me my age and I told him he said sounds like a Senior Citizen to me and I got $8 off.  Okay so I am no Senior Citizen but it did save me money.

I went inside, warmed up with some Chicken Soup and a Sandwich.  Man that was much needed!  Took care of feeding the children and got 1 call at a decent hour.  I woke up throughout the night but nothing but silence and that is the way I would like to spend the rest of the week – no calls and total & complete silence.  Not sure if I will get my wish but there is no charge for wishing. 

Last night I spoke with the Loan Officer and he gave me a contact at the Title Company and they are working to resolve this.  I reached out to them as well and was told that they will be in touch in the next few days.  They are trying to get the original document back before it hits the recorders office.  You would think that would have been done by now but nope.  So I will have to sign another Quit Claim Deed but I will be damn sure to scour every inch of the document before I put ye old john hancock on it. 

Today has been a crazy day.  I started the car and backed out of the driveway and the car started idling funny like it was going to die on me.  I said okay car don’t start.  That was it, smooth sailing into work.  I am really good to my car so hopefully that was just a fluke.  Although I am starting to think that being on call is always going to cost me money because something always seems to go wrong.  Hopefully this is just two times of coincidence and this doesn’t become a frequent pattern.

I was able to enjoy Comedy Wednesday and only had the 1 interruption.  Today is phone day meaning that I spend the bulk of my day on the phone waiting for people to call in with problems.  I have been running around here chasing my tail, plus trying to keep up with the phones.  It is making for a very busy day and I suspect its going to pass right on by quickly, which is fine by me.  I am staying late tonight and reminded all of the children last night and again this morning.  I don’t know if they understood me but I know their stomachs will come normal feeding time which will be off by a 1/2 hour to 45 minutes provided that traffic is moving at a reasonable pace.  It’s already time to go back, see what I mean about time flying by.  Talk with you peeps later.   

Things are popping

Last night I came home and started my usual routine, while I was feeding the children we all heard what was a loud pop.  It sounded like someone was in the house.  I knew that wasn't the case but still we all went to investigate.  The girls changed their mind once I put the food down.  Funny how that affected their decision.  Anyway nothing found everything is okay.  So chalk it up to unknown and move on.  

There were a couple calls last night but the one for me wasn't urgent so I left it for the morning crew to pick up.  There was another one for the "other side" and no one picked it up, not my worry.  I got an e-mail in the middle of the night and outside of that it waas quiet.  That is until Breakfeast.  A receptionist locked herself out of her account, so here I am eating breakfeast trying to login on my laptop and fix this.  It was a cluster.  I had to go to the basement and get on my desktop, got the job done and moved on.  I was late in leaving because of this and didn't get to eat my full breakfast but so be it, I can stand to lose weight.  

Then I am in the car hit the button for the garage and nothing happened.  Then I hit it again and I hear it but nothing is happeneing.  Turns out that pop we heard last night was the garage door spring, it spring!  So thankfully the truck was in the driveway, so I just went back in picked up the keys for it and left through the front door.  I wasn't happy but at least I made it to work on time.  

I called for repair person to come so my car is no longer held hostage.  They will be out this afternoon between 4p and 8p.  I hope its closer to 4p.  In any event I will be leaving work early to take care of this.  I certainly could do without having to take my time and having to shell out more money but it's the joy of home ownership.  I got the approval from the boss.  It probably helped that I agreed to stay late tomorrow night to help cover the phones, it's holiday party time.  

Things are really slow here but that doesn't mean that they won't pickup.  Support comes in waves and you have rest and then there is high tide time!  

It also doesn't help that my body is telling me that it's sick or in the process of dealing with some bug.  Thankfully I have steroids so if things get too out of control I can always take them.  I am finishing up my antibiotics so I don't see how I could possibly get anything but who knows, we all know that my luck isn't exactly the best.  

I just hope that this is the worst of it now.  It's been calm and quiet for a little bit and that is the way I woud like for it to stay for quite sometime.  Just because that is what I want doesn't mean it's what I will get.  Life just seems to happen.  

Outside of that there isn't anything else going on, which is probably a good thing.  Now off to occupy my time during my morning phone shift.  It's only a couple hours long and since I am leaving early there won't be an afternoon shift for me.  Kind of nice when you think about it.  Too bad this couldn't happen on a Tuesday then I could at least had Taco Tuesday :)   

Happy Wednesday, thankful to have made it this far.  I pray that things will remain calm and quiet and that Monday gets here quickly.  Take care!

Sleepy

The night started off with a call around 7:30p and it was as simple as unlocking an account.  Then all quiet until around 11p when an e-mail came in that was for the morning shift.  Nothing to do but roll over and go back to bed.  Then another call came in around midnight and another one at 1 and believe it or not another one at 2 all of these were AM and thankfully they didn't require me to do anything but roll over and go back to sleep.  Then 5am hit and the phone went crazy again nothing for me to do, but as you can see there were constant interuptions to my sleep.  Is it any wonder that I feel tired this morning?  

Good  news is that the massage lady is here this afternoon.  I am on the list.  I stopped by the bank last night to pickup some cash so I am prepared for today.  I am so looking forrward to this as my shoulders and neck have been bothering me.  If she does a good enough job perhaps I will be able to fall asleep, but that is kind of doubtful because she always finds a knot and then just pounds on it so I stay awake and find myself holding my breath.

Considering that I am expecting money in the mail I am watching it like a hawk.  I stopped by last night and was upset to see a card from the Vetinary Teaching Hospital.  It seems as if my vet made a contribution to them in the name of BLU on my behalf.  Now I have no idea how much money they gave them but you can be damn sure it was my money they gave away and not theirs.  The gesture is nice but if they would have told me about it up front that would have gone over better.  I could raise a ruckus but really don't think that would do me any good.  I am sure to mention it in a future vet visit.  Leave off the extras for me I am a poor working man and can't afford the extras.  If I could afford them then I wouldn't be working.  

I also got my next months mortgage bill as well as a welcome packet from my new mortgage company.  They want to make sure that I list them as the leinholder on the property, which I took care of last night with an e-mail to my insurance agent.  Already heard back from him this morning and it's a done deal.  Now if we could just get the Quit Claim Deed figured out that would be superb.  The guy at the mortgage company I went through has already gotten his money and says that he is working on it but I honestly don't think that he is.  The transaction hasn't been recorded with the county so far as I know and that could be a problem when it comes time for the property taxes to be paid.  

When I was at the grocery store on Sunday I bought what I thought were Pumkin Muffins but they turned out to be Orange Cranberry.  I am not a fan of the Cranberry but Orange Cranberry is good stuff.  I had 2 of the 4 muffins last night.  

There you have my evening.  I hope tonight is just as uneventful but that I get less sleep interuptions.  The on-call thing isnt bad during the week, typically.  It's the weekends that suck.  I will just be a happier person when it's all over with.

Oh yeah Bear's diahrea is back.  He is really a mess and wasn't too happy when I went to clean him up, because all of that crap was dried in his fur and if you start ripping fur out he cries because well it's attached and it hurts.  He has a high tolerance but once you cross it you are done!  He is pretty well clean now but could use a nice refreshing shower.  Most cats hate water and mine are no exception to that.  However, in my book I talk about 'The Devil Cat' he loved water because he was raised around it.  After my late partner would finish showering he would jump in the tub and play with thee water and chase it down the drain.  He was a total goofball when it came to water. 

So Tuesday is forging forward and the 2 things I look forward to are 1 my massage and 2 going to bed. I already started my day by talking to one of our crab ass users, hopefully that is not an omen as to what is in store for me.

Take care and I will talk with you peeps later.  

Surpprise

I was very surprised this morning when I logged on to Amazon and put in the title of my book (The Real Life Odd Couple) and it came up and is listed For Sale.  Wow so now the world know all about it.  Doesn't mean anyone will purchase it but the odds are greater.

Last night went pretty well in getting ready for bed but Bear and his diahrea came back.  I wasn't too thrilled about that but at least I didn't clean the carpets this weeekend.  I actually saw him in the litter box yesterday afternoon and told him what a good boy he was.  I cleaned him up both times and all is well.  Marvin came in last night to sleep with me.  I have to trim his claws because he just loves to claw my hand.  The problem is he does that and then my hands form an allergic reaction and it itches and burns at the same time.  It's not the greatest feeling in the world.  Marvin likes affection for attention.  He hates to be brushed or given medicine but if you just want to pet or cuddle with him he is total game.  He even meows before he eats dry food and if I don't pet him he won't eat it.  He also isn't extremly fond of wet food but will eat it on occasion.  

This morning I managed to get out of the house but I left later than normal.  Still made it to work with plenty of time to spare.  That is the really strange thing if nothing is going in the morning I can usually leave whenever and all is okay.  If there is a meeting planned or something I need to do well then traffic is all messed up.  I guess it's just Murphy following me.  

It is very quiet here for a Monday, I won't say that too loud but the phone volume is down, I took 2 calls over the course of 2 and a half hours.  I hope that it stays this way all week.  It wiill make for a long week but better to be bored and quiet than crazy and noisy.  I also hope the same is true for after hours.

So I am bored and thought why not blog.  I am using my iPad.  Well so much for bordem no sooner than I typed that I had a few things break and had to tend to them.  That is a good thing in that it helps pass the time and brings me closer to lunch which ultimatley brings me closer to going home.  I would say quitting time but there is no quit when your on-call.

I did some redecorating at home.  I found a ceramic cross that used to belong to my grandparents.  I cleaned it up and hung it up next to our Civil Union License.  My late partner loved Jessie Barnes who is better known as The Light Painter.  His work is similar to the widley known Thomas Kincaid.  He bought 2 prints, one for each of us to hang above our beds.  I moved his print to the living room and I will say it makes the place look better.  I'm very happy with the choices I made.  All be it subtle but they are noticable by me.  I don't plan on anything drastic changing because that would upset the cats too much, they don't like change.  In any case I am making it more my home now but there will still be the foundation that it was our home.  There is a whole lot to do on that front.  I can only move so fast because it's still painful and I am also lazy.  

Looking forward to Thursday when our massage lady is here.  My  shoulder and neck are all jacked up and I could use some releif.  That is all I know at the moment.  Talk with you peeps later.  

Big Risk

I made it to the Christmas party and sat around and talked a little bit.  I put my name in for a door prize and won a 15 minute massage, which will come in handy by Thursday!  When things were winding down I got a to go container and filled it up with plenty of food.  There was tons left and they were going to throw it all away.  Lots of people were in line filling containers. 

People started to leave and the girl who does catering for meetings approached me and asked me if I was married.  I told her no.  Then she said have you ever been married.  I paused and said no.  A Civil Union is in my state is considered to be a marriage but it is in fact doesn’t have the word Marriage in the title.  Then she said I think that so and so has a crush on you and you talk all the time, I think she would like it if you were her boyfriend.  Well, first of all the lady she is referring to is old as in old enough to be a grandma.  I just told her sorry but that won’t happen.  She said why?  I paused again and said no one knows this, so you will be the only person in the entire company to know but I’m gay and she came back with me too.  Then she told me that she always thought that I was gay.  She tells me that she feels drawn to me and that she thinks highly of me and that I rock as the IT Guy.  You know I have heard what an awesome job that I am doing but her comments really drove how appreciated I am, which made me feel good and like I really did find a home.  So in other words, don’t screw it up.  Anyway, she said why are you single.  I said because my partner died last year.  Oh my God then she couldn’t stop hugging me, it was multiple hugs like every two or three words.  Then we went outside and stood in the drizzle and talked some more and she hugged me even more.  Holy crap.  So she asked me if I ever went out and I said no not really.  She wants to take me to the gay bars and she wants me to come to church with her and her girl.  She gave me her phone number and told me to text her.  I did but I waited until today to do it.  I meant to do it yesterday but time just got away from me.  I hope that I didn’t make a huge mistake.  I know I said I wasn’t going to tell anyone but I figured that my response would have stopped her dead in her tracks, instead it had the opposite effect. She was surprised that I am looking for someone and that I was on Grindr.  I told her you can only find one thing via the app and that is dick, if your looking for something else well you will have a long time to wait, if you ever find anything.  I told her how down on the apps I was, which is why she wants to get me to a gay bar.  Oh joy.  I just hope that she keeps my secret a secret and that I didn’t just blow my cover.

I went to therapy on Saturday morning and told my therapist all about it.  Plus we talked about my depression and the holidays.  It’s totally normal what I am going through.  She is very concerned that I might have been plotting on how to end my life.  I’ve already thought that out and there are multiple plans that I have but I haven’t shared that with her because they are not something that I plan on acting out or even remotely trying.  But for the fact that I lost my partner and we are in the middle of the holiday season life is otherwise grand. 

Yesterday I treated myself in the evening to a date night with myself.  I went to see Horrible Bosses 2 and it was fun at the end but getting there was very painful.  I just wanted to smack those 3 jug heads they were getting on my last nerve.  Afterwards I went to a local pasta restaurant.  I ordered Spaghetti and Meatballs.  This place operates like a Chinese Restaurant, in that minutes after you order your food is sitting in front of you.  I had two huge meatballs a small amount of pasta and then it was covered in a combo tomato and cream sauce.  Holy cow was it good.  Then they managed to talk me into having a cannoni for desert.  The only thing missing was a cherry on each end, it was amazing and added $4 to the bill.  They take a lot of labor to make but it really pays off in the end!

I did cat food shopping yesterday as well and didn’t see the guy that works there, that I met via Grindr.  I also haven’t heard from him.  That is not a total surprise.  However, if things go too much longer with no phone call then I will know that he truly wasn’t interested.  Right now he is still in school and will graduate this week.  So since that is what he was using as an excuse I am hoping that he calls either later this week or next week.  This week I can’t do anything with anyone because I am on-call as of tomorrow night at 7pm.  As you can well imagine I am not looking forward to it but it is part of my job.  I did track things this week and honestly the holidays I think helped a bit because there wasn’t much activity.  That is of course no guarantee that I won’t get slammed to the wall, but I’d like to think that it offers at least a glimmer of hope.  I am leaving my laptop at home so that in case a call comes in I don’t have to rush to the basement to deal with it.  I can just sit here at the kitchen table and take care of things.  I pray that nothing screws up my Comedy Wednesday!

I have recorded or so I think I have the New Now Next Awards that were on Logo about an hour ago.  I saw teasers for it on Facebook from LOGO and the one thing that sold me was Darren Criss nearly naked, yeah that is a good reason to tune in!

I slept in this morning and went back to Cracker Barrel for Breakfast.  If you go there don’t have the Berry French Toast it is horrible.  This coming from a person who likes Blue and Black berries.  I should have stuck with my usual Blueberry Pancakes.  They also have something new right now for winter called a Cinamon Drop Biscuit.  I highly recommend that, you can get them with a meal or just by themselves.  I was lucky in that my waitress forgot to charge me for mine.  Yummy for free.  Then I shuffled off to the grocery store where I was once again raped of my hard earned cash at the register.  Mucinex and Air Fresher were the two high price items that I got.  Both of which I am sure I could get on line for much cheaper.  It’s just that on-line well that bills to a credit card and right now I am trying to stay away from using credit at all costs.  My goal is to get out of debt and not deeper in.

I need to shave and take my extra dose of sleeping medication so that I am out like a light at least before 11p.  Tomorrow is going to suck because it’s Monday but outside of that it will suck just to get going again and then having to be on-call will add a little more suck.  The best news is that it’s only for a week and then I get my life back for what is left of this year and that to me is a very good thing!

All of the children are doing okay.  They have gotten their fair share of food and attention.  We have slept together and taken naps together.  Now the fun is over and it’s back to the working world.  I really would like to see The Interview on Christmas Day, so that might be an excuse to get away from my friends house.  Of course I can go the day after as well but traffic will be horrible because that is the day everyone starts their returns.

I still have Christmas shopping to do.  I need to buy for my friends that feed me at Thanksgiving & Christmas, plus my mom and brother.  After that I am done.  I did do some looking tonight for some items that I would like a fitness bracelet and a WII, both of which I found to be very reasonably priced on Amazon.  I didn’t order just looked. 

There you have it my weekend from the time the party started until Sunday evening when I am prepping for Monday morning.  I hope this is a good and fast moving week.  Take care and be kind to each other.  

Friday

Why hello there!  Sorry it’s been a couple days since you have heard from me.  I got a surprise at work yesterday …. 3 new people all starting today (Friday).  I had to really hustle to get 3 machines built and configured.  Plus there is the little matter of setup.  I made it but it literally took me all day yesterday.  No one had names in the morning when this was announced so that caused me to have to image machines twice because on our network we are not able to just rename a workstation.  It messes with proprietary software and causes all sorts of chaos, so I am told.  Not sure that I buy into that.

I have been trying to get an answer of where my money is from the overage on the loan pay off.  I called the previous lender today and they have so far sent me a check for $50.  However, they are still holding the bulk of the money because it hasn’t been 30 business days.  I am looking into the legal aspect of when by law they have to return my money.  I have no problem in going after them if they are outright blatantly attempting to skirt the law, I hate them so much!  Meanwhile I learned that they plan to give me extra money that my current lender didn’t know about, so it looks like if all goes right I will gain an additional $300.  That is almost worth waiting for.

Today at work I got a letter which was our annual holiday gift.  They gave us $100 on a debit card.  We have to pay taxes on it, but still it’s a nice gesture.  The bastard I used to work for gave cash and there were no taxes.  His rule of thumb was $100 for each year you have been with the company.  Last year I got $300 but was only there for 2 years.  Apparently he was feeling generous or trying to make up for treating me so crappy.  Not sure which one is the case and really don’t care. 

Now I have a huge desire to go out to eat but so many places pop up in my mind.  We are having our annual holiday party and the office is pretty well shutdown.  I am still here and just plan on treating it like a normal day.  The holiday party is a bit much.  I am not a social type person and also afraid that it might trigger some depression.  So I just do my little thing here and go home.  That is unless my boss tells me otherwise.  I haven’t brought it up to her and don’t plan on it.  I know that lots of people will be expecting me at the party but honestly better if I just stay put.

Tomorrow is counseling day, looking forward to it.  I will be giving away the last copy of my book that I have.  I have more copies coming but the folks at LULU wrote the other day to tell me they are just super swamped right now, so there will be a slight delay.  Not a problem.  I can wait.  Of the 2 reviews I have received, both were glowing and good.  I hope to hear from a few more people but not sure if things will play out the way I want them to.

I’ve got a printer to setup this afternoon and then all of the heavy lifting around here is done for the time being.  I’m sure more will come my way, things are never dull for long around here. 

Bear appears to be better, but I believe he peed on the rug last night.  I smelled fresh urine as I climbed the stairs and that is the 1st indication.  I passed out treats as if nothing was wrong and I didn’t go looking to find out, because I didn’t want to deal with it.  I have had a knot in my neck and upper back that has been driving me crazy.  I know it’s all stress related because that is where all of the stress goes is to my shoulders and my neck.  Anyway, I took 1/2 of a muscle relaxer last night and I so didn’t want to get up out of bed.  I was thankful that I only took 1/2 because I know the whole pill would knock me out for a very long time, there would be no getting up.  I also slept alone last night, that doesn’t happen often but it was nice but a little lonely.  Marvin hung out with brother Bear last night – those two are really something else.  You can tell they love each other.  I am glad that Momma had 2 boys and 2 girls, they tend to stick together and the boys gang up on the girls and vice versa.  Poor LB he is just stuck in the middle and he gets it from both ends but overall he is very well liked which is highly unusual – but it’s been like that for a very long time.  Everyone needed time to adjust but once they got it, he is like a friend.  He is no stranger to begging.  Last night I had a couple bites of ice cream, there he was by my side, waiting for his turn.  Sorry he didn’t get a turn, he wasn’t too happy about that. 

I watched a really good movie last night, Christmas with the Kranks.  It had Tim Allen in it and was made back in 2004.  Still it was a very good movie.  Never heard of someone skipping Christmas but honestly I would be okay with it.  In my case it’s not to drudge up the fact that I am all alone.  I do amaze myself in that I reflect on where I was and where I am today.  I can’t imagine how I have managed to make it when everything was against me, but here I am.  For that I am thankful. 

We had some BBQ Chicken Kabobs, cookies, fruit and salad left from a cancelled meeting.  I had 2 kabobs and damn they were really good.  Peppers and the Chicken pieces were wrapped in Bacon and then the whole thing was smothered with BBQ sauce.  Oh my I could eat like that for a while before I would get tired.  I had yogurt and fruit from my lunch.  That is it.  Just got the word from my boss to get out and go to the party.  Gee just what I didn’t want to do.  It’s a crappy rainy day and I would honestly love to stay put or even just go home.  Ah well I always do what I am told even if I don’t like it. 

That is a wrap on with my afternoon.  Hope you all have a nice weekend.  Talk with you peeps later.

Made it

So it took a little effort but I made it in.  Things were crazy this morning, playing catch up is never fun.  Plus everyone saw I was back so I had a lot of people asking questions.  One guy even asked if I would work on his home system.  I declined, it’s better that way because once you touch a system, people tend to blame you for every little thing that goes wrong with it.  I don’t want to be hounded and to take on that level of responsibility. 

One of the people that used to work here (she was let go about a month ago) was murdered over the weekend.  It’s just a crazy world, you never know when or if your number is up. 

I did enjoy Tosh.O last night with the children.  Bear has learned a new trick, how to crap on the wall.  I am not exactly happy about that but I deal with it.  Poor thing has diarrhea.  Not exactly sure why because he is getting his medicine and his diet hasn’t changed.  He may just need a break from the medicine, hopefully it clears up fast because that is no fun.  He came in my room last night, I cleaned him up but boy he smelled.  I had to spray some air freshener and eventually I became nose blind to it. 

Friday is the office Christmas party.  Considering that I was off for 2 days I don’t think I am asking about going.  It starts early in the afternoon and goes until 5pm.  Free food which is always a good thing.  But it is at a place away from the office.  I honestly don’t want to go but I think if I did ask to go that it would be pushing it, my boss may think differently.  I don’t plan on finding out.  Unless someone says something I plan on treating it like a normal work day.  It’s just that it will get quiet around here early.  Not a bad thing. 

The people that helped with the loan finally cashed their check for the funding of the escrow account.  I am still waiting on my refund.  I have asked about it but no word yet.  I also haven’t heard anything from my local Recorders Office that makes the official record of the transfer.  I brought that up as well and am still waiting to hear about it.  I suspect since they got paid and have sold the loan they really could care less.  I will be calling the old mortgage company inquiring about the refund if it doesn’t show up in the next day or so. 

I have this pain in my neck, like there is a knot between my neck and shoulder.  Great day for a massage to get it worked out.  Problem is there is no massage therapist here on a Wednesday.  She always comes on a Thursday and we usually have a sign up sheet out by now.  I don’t think she will show until next Thursday, which is okay by me.  I will get it worked out. 

Tonight is comedy Wednesday …. The Goldbergs, Modern Family and The Middle.  Hopefully it will be a barrel of laughs or at least a good time.  I am still mulling over what I want to eat for supper.  The children I am sure will be elated to see me and think that I have starved them to death.  There is enough food to make it to the end of the week, provided they play their cards right.

This morning I had to pass out a couple of extra cans because Insty & Bear didn’t really care for what I gave them.  They know I will give in because I am scared to death that someone is going to stop eating.  Eat up, I’d rather pay a food bill than a Dr. bill any day of the week.  Food is much, much cheaper and you get more of it for your money than you would a doctor bill.

Well I have to run.  Just wanted you to know that I am back in the saddle so to speak and looking forward to the weekend.  Talk with you peeps later.

One more day

Last night I got a call from a friend of mine telling me that she was in the hospital.  She couldn’t talk long because she was getting upset easily and was in for heart issues.  She was crying at one point and had to end the call.  I had dreams of her dying and was thinking about her even when I wasn’t awake.  Needless to say it didn’t make for a productive nights sleep.  I had enough I could have gone in but decided well, take one more day.  Be lazy and enjoy the company of the cats.

I did the Doctor On Demand with my phone.  The Dr. I spoke with didn’t want to give me antibiotics.  She said that just because you see yellow flem it doesn’t mean there is an infection.  Research proves it, she said.  However, after we bantered back and forth, she called something in for me.  She said wait 7 days and if your no better then take it.  Oh, okay sure thing.  Fuck that I started on the medicine right away.  I don’t want this to linger – I want to get rid of it. 

I also had to hit up the pharmacy for Lucky.  There is a very hot short guy that works there.  He is pumping iron and looking oh so fine.  However, I saw a wedding ring so I didn’t even ask.  Just got her medicine and left.

I saw a couple movies today.  One of which was Father of The Year.  It had Robin Williams in it.  I couldn’t bring myself to watch it for a while because of Robin’s passing, it just didn’t seem right.  However, it is a good film.  If you recently lost someone probably best to watch it with a box of tissues.  There is humor in it but there is also some profound sadness.  It’s on Amazon Prime and NetFlix.  Amazon isn’t playing well with me so I had to switch to NetFlix. 

While my body may in fact be suffering from an infection, what I am dealing with is depression.  It took me until just a few moments ago to realize that.  I have no desire to do anything.  No sex drive but if I see a cute guy I of course notice.  I tried to talk myself into McDonald’s for lunch but decided it would be better to go home and eat something there.  I wound up eating chips and drinking a soda.  I had Lasagna and Chocolate Cake for supper, along with a couple more sodas.  I just feel like I have done so much and kept going but the reality of things hasn’t changed.  I am still all alone, the one person on earth that I loved more than anything or anyone is gone and not returning.  While it sounds simple it is rather hard to wrap my mind around it.  All I want to do is just die.  People tell me that I look so happy when in reality inside I am not happy at all.  Sure I have my moments and right now depression is winning.  Tomorrow I have no choice I have to go back or I will screw up my holiday vacation.  So while I will probably have another bought of depression as we get closer to the holidays I will somehow have to shake it off and keep on going.  I can pretend and not focus on it but that only goes on for so long.  So I realize I have a problem and staying home won’t make it go away.  Going to work won’t make it go away.  I just have to deal with it by trying to shake it off.  It’s understandable to experience this with everything being still very new, in 4 more months I will be marking the 2 year anniversary of his passing.  It still feels like yesterday! 

My goals for this year were to get a new job and to get the house.  I’ve accomplished both.  Now I have to keep the new job and the house – the only way I know how by going to work, which is rather easy once you get into the routine, but once you stop well it’s hard as hell to get going again.  I will get there, as I have no choice.

My goals for next year are to try to be happier, to build my savings and to get a guy.  Not sure if I will succeed, but I have to try. 

In other news I mailed a friend a copy of my book, I went out of my way to a post office that I know gives great turn around time.  She still hasn’t gotten it yet.  I am starting to wonder if it’s lost or if it’s on it’s way back to me because of postage.  Ironically this is the same friend who is in the hospital.  I knew I should have just driven it out to her but I took the lazy and much cheaper way out.  I have put copies in the mail to a couple of other folks and thus far nothing has been returned.  I have to presume that the mail is just slower right now because of the holiday and all of the greeting cards and packages floating in the system.  Hopefully she gets it soon.  I’d like to write another book just tossing around ideas for content.  If you have any suggestions, feel free to leave them in the comments.

Well it’s about time to go scoop the litter boxes and pass out treats – that is the one bad thing about being home.  They all expect lunch and if I let them they would con me out of a snack as well.  I tried to stay on the couch and not move as much as possible.  If they think I am asleep or if they fall asleep they won’t beg me.  Sneaky I know.  I will miss them tomorrow but the show must go on.  Not looking forward to it but hopefully it helps my mood and my health.  Friday we are having a holiday party and they are shutting the office down.  I really would prefer to just come home and relax.  I am not one for socializing at work but it might just turn out to be a good time. 

Say a prayer for me, better yet make it 2!  Talk with you peeps later.

Sick Day

I woke up at 5am and had to blow my nose.  Rather uncommon!  So I did and after that I had to do it again.  I was able to get back in bed, but had to do it again.  I tried to go back to sleep but that didn’t work.  So I got up fed everyone including myself and then took the day off from work.  I popped a Benadryl along with all of my other daily meds and went back to bed.  I fell asleep pretty quickly.  I woke up and was drenched, which is a normal reaction for my body.  I fired up the electric blanket and went back to bed.  It was like 11 or 12 when I rolled out of bed.  Prior to returning to bed I put my phone on Do Not Disturb but forwarded my calls to my home # just in case some emergency came up.  I did get a call but it looked like a wrong # so I didn’t answer and they didn’t leave a message. 

I had a Chicken Pot Pie for lunch.  I really didn’t want to eat at all but it was okay.  I laid around and watched stuff off of Netflix.  I switched over to Amazon and had a fight on my hands all day long.  I watched Kramer Vs. Kramer but it took me all day to do it.  Wow, I was only 8 years old when that movie came out.  I remember my grandmothers hairdresser saying how provocative the movie was and that kids shouldn’t see it, etc. That has made me want to watch it ever since, like I was missing something.  No I really didn’t miss anything.  There was some good acting going on but it was all about hurt and a little boy trapped in the middle of a custody battle.  I did like the part where Dustin Hoffman said I will have a job in 24 hours after he just got fired.  That took some drive and it was pretty close to Christmas.  Nothing like that would happen today unless it was a miracle.

Speaking of being fired, that is on my mind since I called in.  I mean I have time but this is like the 3rd time I have called in since I started.  I guess being raised Catholic plus not exactly having a good track record with previous employers it’s a fear that I suppose will always be with me.  I don’t think I have anything to worry about but that doesn’t make it any easier to deal with.  I must say that I picked a good day to call in because we had some rain over night and everything was a sheet of ice.  If I feel bad tomorrow I won’t push it and will stay home, but will also seek some form of medical care be it an office visit to my doctor or going to the doctor via video camera.  I would much rather go in because things are just stacked up waiting for me and the only way to stay on top of things is to be there to do the work.

Right now I feel okay, I think this was more of an allergy thing or at least hope it was.  I can stay home 1 more day without screwing up my holiday vacation.  Plus we had a small battle this afternoon about who is on-call.  My boss needed someone to volunteer and since no one did she moved everyone’s on-call time up by a week, but then out of no where people volunteered.  I dodged a bullet because I am on next week and if I was on this week that would have screwed up my therapy appointment on Saturday.

Just me and the kids today and they took full advantage of me, worming me out of extra food and of course getting their fair share of attention.  Ruth & Marvin have been hibernating all day, which is normal for them.  I don’t like to see that but I guess it’s what they are comfortable with.  Ruth will come alive tonight and of course tomorrow morning, provided that I leave and go to work. 

Staying home is very boring and all I wanted to do was eat, but things that weren’t good for me.  I did polish off all of the Turkey day stuff, except for what is left of a piece of Chocolate Cake.  It all was pretty good and I am honestly thankful that it’s gone.  Back to regular food!  The holidays have me depressed and missing my guys, that being BLU and my former partner.  Plus I changed things up on the dating apps thinking that would get me some responses but nope.  I am just so lonely, which is all the more reason to want to go back to work and be around people, especially ones who know my name.  There is also a sexual component but the main thing is just companionship.  I long to find my special someone.  I think I have done a good job of holding things together but honestly it feels like its all going to fall apart any minute now.  All of this is depression and I suppose part of the grieving process.  I long to go back to the good times but also long to move forward and make new good times. 

So 4 more days to go and then we have the weekend.  My last weekend of freedom for a week.  As I mentioned next week I am on-call and so not looking forward to it.  Hopefully, it will be quiet.  I of course will be paying attention to how things go this week and hope that everything is smooth sailing.  It will be my last time on-call this year.  Then we have to wait and see what the boss comes up with for a schedule.  I just hope I am not back on for a while, a two month or longer break would be awesome. 

Back to TV and trying to find some entertainment.  Talk with you peeps later.