13 May 2013

World imploding

I have had to file appeals in both the car discount and the death benefit issues.  The death benefit is more concerning to me.  They don’t see a Civil Union as a marriage, if it had the word marriage in it then there wouldn’t be a problem.  I just hope the person reviewing the case realizes that my state doesn’t offer same sex marriage but they do offer a civil union.  Had marriage been an option, we would have done it.  I mean 25 years together but we were only legally spouses for 3 months.  Right now they want to give all the money to his son, I won’t let that happen w/o a fight. 

The bank has decided since my guy was in bankruptcy they can’t help me.  So basically they want me to keep making the monthly payments but don’t want to help.  I am trying to get financing on my own but with a recent bankruptcy most places won’t help me.  I have a credit union and they asked me to fill out an application, which I did.  Just waiting to hear back from them.  I don’t think it will be good news.  I am careful as to not apply too many places because the more places that pull your credit report the more your credit score goes down hill.

I started the day off in a depression mostly from a muscle relaxer that I took last night.  The depression wore off but the day well it’s just gotten worse and worse. 

Me and my guy have had to fight for everything.  I don’t understand why things can’t be easier.  I received a letter from a televangelist that he was corresponding with and it mentioned my name and talked about a blessing coming my way, but you have to comply with x and send in x for it to happen.  Now that I threw that away all of the bad things are starting to happen.  Makes me scratch my head and go hmmm, what if. 

I could use a nice hot man, a good stiff drink and about a year of vacation.  However, none of those things are going to happen.  What is worse is there is not too many people I can talk to and I can’t go home and tell anyone, well I could but they won’t understand. 

Basically if the house payments are not lowered in some form or fashion with in the course of a year I will be fucked and not in a good way.  Now you see why I didn’t want to buy an iPad.  I’m not taking it back, this just has to work out some way. 

I saw what the credit union had for payments and it’s like 500 to 1,000 per month, not bad at all.  I can swing that but I doubt seriously if I qualify for that low of a payment.  Time will tell.

I got to get back to work, not much more left in the day and what I can get done today will help me tomorrow.  Still trying to dig out from the storm.

Honestly, it won’t take much to push me to the point where I just give up.  Giving up isn’t what I want to do but it’s difficult to wade through everything.  I love the cats and don’t want to see anything bad happen to them or have them split up.  So much is on the line.

Eh, okay back to it.  Talk with you later.

1 comment:

Jude said...

I'm praying that things will work out for the best for you my friend! ((hugs))