07 May 2016

Wedding 689

Today was an emotional day for me.  It started out with a visit to my mom.  I really didn’t want to go see her but I promised her that I would be by soon and figured that today was probably the best day of all.  I have commitments the next two weekends and who knows what will come up after that.  She did a lot of crying, it didn’t take much and as fast as the tears stopped they started up again.  She sounds like she really hates the nursing home, but she elected to go there.  Now she has remorse and wants to go back to the house but there is no house to go back to.  She was worried that they are going to put a rock on her income and I explained to her that I did my research and it’s done, no one can garnish or otherwise have claim to her disability income.  Our state has an anti-deficiency law so that once you surrender your property to the bank, that is full and final payment.  If there is a balance on the loan they can’t come after you for it.  If she remembers and can keep the facts straight when she tells my brother that, he will be overjoyed since he is legally responsible for her.  I thought for sure he had made a huge mistake and was going to regret it but lucky for him the law appears to be written in his favor.  Mom’s still trying to get into a state program and get moved to an apartment.  I honestly don’t think that she will qualify for her own apartment and can live totally on her own.  I think she will always need someone to watch over her.  The mom that I knew and remember is gone and has been gone for quite sometime.  I have to deal with the new mom and her mental state.  It’s really very sad.  Then again I am not all that well attached to her, given our ups and downs as well as the way I have been treated in the past.  It is to my benefit to keep my distance, I know my sanity and life are far better off.  Kind of sad that it has to be that way but it is what it is. 

I knew it was coming today was a very special day for Will & RJ the YouTube couple I have watched for many years.  They live streamed their wedding, they wrote their own vows and it was an awesome ceremony.  It’s all captured on video and it’s available if you’d like to watch over at their channel http://www.youtube.com/shep689  They are both young and in love.  They have been together for six years and 6 months.  That is a very short time but long enough to know if you want to make the long term commitment to get married.  I am profoundly happy for both of them, but it did bring back a flood of memories for me.  I have never cried at a wedding, but I did today.  It was so awesome that they thought of their viewers and decided to share their special moment with the rest of the world.  Twitter was a mess waiting for the livestream to begin.  It started on my phone before I could get it going on my Roku.  Finally everything came together and I was able to watch it on TV which is a much larger screen than my phone.  Wow is all I can say.  Simple but elegant ceremony surrounded by family and friends, how high they both must feel right now.  It was a HUGE step to take and one that I hope will last them both a lifetime.  I’ve written to them before, even sent them a copy of my book.  It’s no secret that I am writing them again, going to pickup a card at the store tomorrow to send to them.  I didn’t want to do it but then I felt compelled to reach out.  I touched on my story and told them to take time to plan for the unforeseen, I know that is probably not appropriate but just knowing what I went through, never thinking that I would have to make a decision to remove life support – it can and often does happen in the blink of an eye.  I encouraged them to take time and talk with each other, to have the necessary legal paperwork drawn up so there are no questions and everything is in order.  I of course congratulated them and wished them all the best.  Watching kind of made me wish I was younger and could experience the same thing.  I can’t say if I will ever get married again, but it’s not something that I am ruling out.  I doubt that I will ever find someone as special as my late partner but I know that there is someone out there for me, finding him is the difficult part.  Kind of wish I could speed that up.

Now we move on to the part where I got mad.  I’ve placed two phone calls to the vet about Momma asking about a Plan “B” since I can’t afford their Plan “A” option.  No one has called me back.  I was determined to go over and throw a fit in the lobby, but instead I chose to put my anger in words.  I have had and still harbor anger because of what happened with Big Boy/Bear.  I think they should give him free medical care for the rest of his life, but convincing them of that is another story.  My late partner encouraged me to keep my mouth shut and not express my feelings.  Well he’s not here and I have had it.  So I let some of it out when I had to take Bear over and I let more out today when I wrote a letter.  Come to find out their website has malicious software, I browsed to their site from Work and it set off all kinds of alarms.  I did it from home today and same thing.  So I was a nice guy and told them about it for free.  Hopefully they do something about it so that their customers who don’t have up to date security software aren’t infected.  There isn’t a privacy or data breach issue at this point, but if the virus that wanted on to my machine actually got through and I logged in then there would be a data breach.  I should have charged the bastards but instead I was kind figuring that might help further my cause.  I faxed the letter to them, so hopefully on Monday someone will reach out to me.  If that is not the case and I don’t have a response by mid-week, then lets just say it won’t be pretty because I will be over there and in someone’s face.  I might be weak on somethings but if it comes to my furry babies then I am very protective, to the point that I would take a bullet or get ran over by a car if I could do it and they wouldn’t be hurt or injured. 

I got through my letters last night, took an awful lot of paper, proofing and coordination but I have filed a last ditch appeal with the union that my partner was a member of that provides the insurance to me.  I also reached out to the local hospital that runs the urgent care facility as well as the conglomerate that contracts with them to supply physicians.  I explained that the insurance claim was submitted incorrectly as an office visit.  It probably was just a typo but the more I thought about it I viewed it as a fraudulent and deceptive way for them to collect revenue that they were not otherwise entitled to.  I asked them to reimburse me for their error.  Plus I looped in the appropriate state agency's so they could start their own investigation.  I don’t give a damn who gives me back my money but I want it from someone.  If the company gives back the money I will tell the union, I’m not looking to commit insurance fraud or to make money on this, I simply want back what is rightfully mine.  I still have a right to sue but we both know that I’m not going there it would be far too time consuming and if I lost I would be out a lot more than what is owed to me.  So let’s just hope my strong words bring some swift action.  Should be interesting!

I wore my pride shirt out today. It takes some guts to put that on and go out in the world.  You just never know what kind of reaction your going to get.  I got a compliment from a waitress on it.  So far it’s been a very positive experience.  I think wearing it might just attract a guy or so I hope. 

I am all wound up and ready to burn the midnight oil, despite yawning.  The kids all want to go to bed.  Momma has already yelled at me that I am up past my bed time.  They have their routines just like I have mine.  If I disturb theirs it’s difficult but they recover.  If mine are disturbed it can throw my whole day off.  I have a love hate relationship with routines but I do like structure!

We had some wicked storms pass through the area.  Thankfully my town has power.  There are surrounding towns that don’t have power, lots of trees and power lines down.  I turned on the scanner and the power company is talking way more than the police or fire departments.  It got kind of annoying so I turned it off. 

Tomorrow I continue my laundry adventure, clean the house, give Bear his bath and prepare for Monday.  I’m not anxious like I was last Monday but I am sure it will all come together.  I still feel like I bit off way more than I can chew, I remain scared but optimistic that it’s going to fall into place.  I am sure there will be areas that I will excel in and other areas where I lack, thankfully no one is expecting me to pick this stuff up overnight.  I want to ask about a subscription to a service for some training and to further my education but I don’t know if they will cover it.  The cost is $400 for 1 year, which considering everything that is available is really cheap.  They help you prep for tests for certifications, talk about most everything under the sun that is IT related and even if your not studying for a cert you can learn something from watching.  Remember the 3 day law firm from 2 years ago?  Yeah when I asked them for the subscription that is when they fired me, after 3 days.  Thankfully my present employer has much more faith in me and I have a stellar reputation for customer service and getting shit done!  Right now I can’t afford the $300 since my recent vet visits.  However, if I get to the point where I can afford it, I will gladly make the investment.  It would do wonders for me in self confidence and help my paycheck to grow if I was able to get a cert or two under my belt.  Plus it would also make me more marketable should I ever find myself looking for a job again. 

Well Momma is throwing a small fit and before she has a canary I think I should obey her and get upstairs to pass out meds and wind down for the night.  Still watching Frankie and Grace, it’s awesome!  Take care and I hope your having a great weekend.  We shall talk again soon!

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