Argh, Friday

Something (not sure what) bit me on the palm of my hand close to my wrist.  It itches like mad and there is a tiny small bump.  Not exactly the way I wanted to start the day off.  Gator also had me up early 4a for food.  She is acting a bit strange this morning.  Not sure if it’s the weather or if there is something wrong with her or if she just needs some daddy time. 

Called the eye doctor they don’t have an appointment for me and worse yet they can’t find that I have insurance.  Their computer system according to the lady I spoke with has been doing some strange things lately.  I’m positive that I have coverage so I am going to let them sort that out and then call me back for an appointment.  They have a new office closer to my home and that is where I will want to go. 

Now my Saturday morning just got freed up and based on how I feel today I don’t much feel like doing anything.  It’s over cast here and that doesn’t exactly help things.  Not sure if my energy level will pick up but at least I know one thing is for sure I can do whatever I want tomorrow.  I will probably be lazy but hey only time will tell. 

Happy Friday and I hope you enjoy your weekend!

1 more day until Friday

We have had some severe weather and there is more forecast for later tonight and into the early hours of tomorrow.  Gator and I were on the couch, I was working and she was resting.  There was a loud clap of thunder and we both looked at the other one as if to say what in the world was that.  Afterwards there was this odd odor like something was burning.  I looked outside didn’t see any smoke and went around the house, everything was okay.  A few hours later it smelled musty in my living room.  Compared to the smell of last week this is tame.  Not desirable or enjoyable but better than what I was dealing with.  Were in for a cool wave and temperatures are going to cool off for a bit. 

After seeing the storm kind of makes me want to reassess my priorities and get the deck cleaned off as well as the gutters in the back.  The one in the front of the house needs to be cleaned again because all my leaf blower did was blow stuff around and mostly on to the roof.  It’s all coming back down.  I could see the gutters were flooded today and while that site never used to bother me, ever since my brush with mold it makes me paranoid and feel uneasy. I am very eager to get the painting project started and finished before the dog days of summer are here.  This weekend will be perfect painting weather.  

I also found out yesterday that my GFCI outlet in the garage needs to be replaced.  The AC Repair guy needed power to use a saw and my garage had nothing.  The GFCI won’t reset.  I don’t have any tripped breakers and I did verify with an AC detection tool that there is voltage in the outlet.  Turned on YouTube and it looks like it’s just as easy to replace the outlet and my problem there should be solved.  My late spouse was an electrician and I’ve got tons of tools, meters and gadgets.  Some I know how to use and others I have no clue.  He was brave and would work on a live circuit that’s something I won’t do. 

This week I have also caught myself making stupid errors, a few I didn’t catch and they were brought to my attention.  I hate that.  I’m wondering if I am just over stressed or perhaps the fumes or odor of whatever it is that I have inhaled is affecting my brain. 

Finished up the pizza from last week today.  I made my dollar stretch into several meals and like when I can do things like that.  I am uncommonly tired tonight.  I had a nap early this afternoon and was fine up until a couple hours ago.  It’s also a little humid in here and that doesn’t help things. 

I am cutting my hair tonight, going to get my prescription tomorrow after work.  I’d like to grab a bite to eat while I am out but not sure if I will give in to that considering the unexpected bill from yesterday.  Bills are ready to be paid.  I need to call the cable company and try to haggle on the price of my internet connection and don’t ever look forward to a negotiation phone call because I am the one who is held hostage.  I also have an eye doctor appointment on Saturday but I need to call and confirm because they called earlier via a robo call and said that I need to make an appointment.  I looked on-line and it doesn’t show anything scheduled so maybe my appointment fell off the books.  I do have 1/2 a mind to just not do anything and either show up or skip it.  However, I will call because if I drive there and they turn me away I will be livid.  The appointment is first thing in the morning on Saturday and that would get in the way of whatever task I feel most motivated to preform. 

There isn’t much on streaming media that is of interest to me.  I did see Crown Vic a movie on Hulu it was about the police and was made several years back.  Typical drama/action movie, nothing terribly special.  I also saw a movie that was super crazy called Pawn Shop it had Paul Walker in it and it started off normal enough and then got strange, I finished it this afternoon.  It’s about time to switch over to my DVR and see what is waiting for me. 

I am just tired and bored tonight.  Would be nice to have someone to talk to.  I hope that my weekend is productive, restful and enjoyable.  I suppose only time will tell.  Talk with you all again soon.  

AC–update

So as luck would have it the guy shows up and everything works fine.  However after a few minutes of running it was easy to figure out that the fan motor needed to be replaced.  It didn’t sound good and was overheating.  The guy was here at around 2:30p and just left about 20 minutes ago it’s close to 6p now.  The motor was all rusted on and it was very difficult to remove and replace.  He did give me new capacitors for both the fan motor and the compressor so there is a little peace of mind.  If the compressor goes out then it’s a new unit for sure. 

You can do an A coil and new outside unit for $3 thousand or a complete new system for $6 thousand.  I took the less expensive route and think that will last for a while or so I hope. 

The Freon level was spot on and the system is performing well given it’s age.  I spent the time outside with the tech while he was making the repairs.  My feet and back are hurting.  Gator was resting comfortably on the couch.

This was for sure an unplanned expense but that’s why I have savings.  It’s not like I want to spend the money but given the options I would rather pay the money and be comfortable. 

I spoke with the tech about the mystery odor and he couldn’t attribute anything HVAC related that would have caused this. 

Back to normal life for now and going to grab some supper. Here’s hoping everything stays together and nothing else falls apart. 

New problem

I did a load of dishes and finally decided to clean out the spice rack.  My late spouse had tons of seasoning and I never bothered to deal with it.  In keeping with my odor eliminating tasks, I threw out all of the old spices but a couple things of celery salt as well as salt & pepper.  I found a bottle of salad dressing that was never opened, you could tell it went bad despite never being opened because it was discolored. I will bet that had to smell if it was opened but I decided not to find out. 

Things were going along fine and the AC kicked on I kicked back and was resting during my so called lunch hour.  Then I heard this odd noise and went outside to look.  Sure enough the compressor for the AC unit was running but the fan wasn’t turning.  I have a call in to a repair person and since it’s warm weather season they are all busy.  They said they should be able to get to me today but have no idea on what time.  It’s 75 in here now so hopefully they will arrive before I start to melt. 

I think that it’s the capacitors that power the fan.  Those bastards used to go out once per season and then some how I got lucky and managed to get 5 years out of them, that is presuming that is the problem.  It’s got the symptoms but only a repair person can tell me for sure.  It’s been an hour since this horrid event started and I am sweating already.  I can tell you for sure that I am due for a new furnace and ac but just don’t have the money for it.  I’ve limped along on this system for years and don’t see why I can’t get a few more out of it.  Especially since I there is a small possibility that I might move. 

Cats love heat but they need AC as well or they can run into breathing problems.  If things get too hot I will take Gator and we will go sit in the car with the AC on full blast.  If things get real bad I can either get a hotel and try to take her with me or drop her at the vets for boarding.  Right now I am hopeful that this will only set me back a few hundred dollars.  I called the same company that fixed the furnace back when I came home and it was 55 degrees in here and Momma was huddled behind the TV in my room for warmth looking at me from inside my stereo cabinet.  Everyone was pissed off and cold that night.  It was a few hundred dollars and we were all warm again within hours.  The ignitor on the furnace was bad.  I’m hoping for similar luck with the AC.

I will post an update when I know more.  Wish me luck or something like that. 

Exhausted

I have really been wracking my brain and driving my body crazy over this odor.  Sunday night when I should have been going to bed an idea hit me and I just had to try it.  The drain hose from the AC could be clogged and maybe there is a backup of water (humidity) and that would breed bacteria and cause an odor.  I removed the hose and hooked up a shop vac to the AC and it pulled out small amount of water but a lot of built up junk.  Meanwhile I took the hose and came up to my bathroom, sure enough it was part way clogged.  I got it cleaned out and hoped that when I put everything back together in a few minutes that would be the end of the odor. 

The worst part of that wonderful idea was cleaning up the shop vac it was a mess but I took care of it.  The odor now that were on day #2 seems to have subsided for the most part.  I still get a whiff of it once and a while. While I think the battle is over with I am not quite ready to call it a resolved issue just yet but I think were way closer than we were a week ago.  Lord knows what Gator & I have inhaled over the course of the past week. 

My angry orange cleaner came and it didn’t have nearly the strong citrus odor that I thought it would.  Lucky for me I found Citrus Magic at the grocery store and they make a small spray can that works wonders. 

I got through Monday it was a bit of a difficult/busy day but finally the end arrived.  I went to bed only to get woken up by Gator.  I settled back down and then my body woke me up.  I was up part of the night and while I could have easily pushed myself I felt exhausted so I said fuck it and took the day off.  All I really wanted to do is sleep and I have done that off and on all day long.  Let’s hope that I sleep tonight because I need to get back to work tomorrow.  Shit builds up and it takes forever to clean out the pile of work. 

I talked myself into getting on the floor in front of the fridge since I did smell an odor by the fridge.  Man alive I saw 16 plus years of cat fur and it was not a pretty site.  Hooked up the vacuum cleaner and got it all cleaned out.  I think I probably saved myself the cost of a refrigerator.  Not sure how the poor thing hasn’t quit before now.  Cleaning the cover at the bottom was the extent of the cleaning that we did and now I know there’s more to do.  I should be good for a while now since the number of cats has decreased but I know there eventually will be some build up of fur and dust. 

I think with all of the sucking the poor vacuum cleaner has done it might just be time to get a new one.  I’ve got the dust collection bin airing out in the garage after I soaked it with Lysol.  I will need to get in an really clean it and change the filter.  This cheap thing has done a mountain of work but I still to this day miss my Dyson.  It did a good job but the reach on the wand was the best and it was so quick and easy to deploy compared to this cheap thing where I have to fight to dislodge the hose from the base and then get out plastic tubes to form a wand.  It’s a lot more effort. 

As you can imagine this odor fight has not done any favors for my mental state and depression has been working overtime on me.  I am in so much mental pain and feel so alone it’s horrible.  Thankfully my furry friend is still here and she is what keeps me from doing anything drastic.  I know this isn’t something that people want to read about but mental health is no joke.  Add in the isolation from COVID and it really makes things much worse, at least for me. 

This weekend I am supposed to be going to the eye doctor but I have to call to confirm I think my appointment might have fallen off the books.  I would like to get the painting on the garage trim done and if I feel up to the task the deck power washed.  Knowing my body & energy level I think that each of these tasks are meant for separate days.  I know we have a 3 day weekend upon us and I might be able to take 2 days to get these tasks done based on how I feel right now I would just as soon spread them out. 

I am off to grab some left over pizza and find something of interest to watch to occupy my time before I call it a day.  I need to cut my hair and am still taking that task upon myself for a bit longer.  I don’t feel ready enough to go back to the salon but I am sure that it will happen.  It’s nice to see things opening up and being able to go into certain stores without a mask on.  I still hear rumblings of a fall surge in cases and don’t understand why that is a possibility now.  I’m fine with spending the rest of the year working from home but don’t think that I will stay here when I have time off so long as I feel up to it.  Eating out has been super enjoyable I just wish more places would open up and I know that too will happen with time. 

Even though I didn’t see any comments or feedback I hope that my odor search will be of help to someone in the future.  As long as you have money you can own a home but that doesn’t mean that you have the knowledge to fix things when they break and that’s kind of where I am at.  I have some knowledge and can do basic stuff but anything complex needs to be farmed out.  I really hope that I am at the end of my home problems for a very long time.  Cheers!

Saturday

I am tired, sore & exhausted.  Last night I thought I found the source of the lingering odor in a bookcase.  I took everything off the shelves and cleaned it.  I put some baking soda in a dish and let it sit overnight as well as vinegar in a different dish and placed them in different locations on the bookcase.  The bookcase no longer has the odor but the odor is still present in the air. 

This morning thinking about wood and how it can absorb odors I cleaned my cd case (yep full of music CD’s) and also a bookcase in my room.  I was surprised to find some D cell batteries and when I lifted them up I saw that they had began to leak.  I had to scrape away the solidified acid and that ruined a shelf but it’s my fault. 

I did manage to get rid of a lot of junk that had accumulated but unfortunately the odor is still present.  Talking with my boss on Thursday afternoon he thought this would be a simple fix.  He said it’s probably sewer gas go run the water in all of the drains that you haven’t used and if you have a toilet in the mix flush it a couple times.  Your P traps ran dry and that lets sewer gas into your house.  I followed his advice and for a short time everything was hunky dory and then just like that the odor was back.  In fairness the windows were open.

I’ve also run the hell out of my ozone machine and the basement actually doesn’t appear to have the odor any longer it’s just an upstairs thing.  I have also pulled out the refrigerator and cleaned behind it.  I am literally going out of my mind trying to track this down and get it resolved.

This afternoon I sat in my room watching Looney Toons on YouTube relaxing with a gator in my lap.  She buried her head and fell fast asleep.  She was not pleased with me when I woke her up.  I said bed and she moved over to the bed.  I got up and joined her.  She let me hold her paw and rested her head on top of mine.  I think she understands that I am worried and upset about this odor business. 

I’m sniffing everything from the wall to the floor with no luck.  After my brief period of rest where I thought for sure I would fall asleep I got up and decided to wash the outside of the house.  As I was spraying I thought I smelled what is inside of my house on the outside.  I got all of the green off the side of the house (there wasn’t that much) and managed to shine up the dormer it went from dirt black back to original white.  I screwed up when I was using the solution and had the bottle on Spray when it should have been on rinse.  I used Mold Armor house wash.  It was in a bottle you hook up to your hose.  There was bleach in the solution.  Bleach actually doesn’t kill mold it feeds it (look on line I’m not kidding.  I had a guy tell me that in person and found a couple sources on line as well.).  I expected that when I went inside my house that I would find wet walls or wet floorboard but nope, bone dry. 

It’s either my neighbor is running a meth lab or something has had to get into my attic be it debris or an animal.  I have run out of options at the moment but I will still be thinking about this.  I don’t like to let my problems win and I also don’t give up.  This may turn out to be something horrific or it may be an easy solution.  My nasal passages are irritated and I kind of wish I would go nose blind if only for a day.  I think about whatever it is that we are breathing in and just hope it’s not something that will cause harm to either of us. 

Tomorrow is going to suck because I will be much more sore than I am today.  I need to hit up a pharmacy since the Sudafed shortage in my area continues and the grocery store.  I am going to try to take it easy for the rest of the night and hope that I can get a good nights rest.  I sure am tired on multiple levels. 

I saw an ad on social media for some new apartments in the area and wow they get more than my mortgage payment each month in rent for something that is super small.  It’s marketed as ‘luxury living’ but unless that luxury includes free blow jobs or a chef it sounds like a rip off to me.  I am very much on the fence when it comes to moving but if this odor business keeps on going it may well be the final nail in the coffin.  While I don’t like to give up and walk away, we all have our breaking points granted mine is probably longer than most, only because I’ve learned that if your patient enough eventually there will be a solution.  Here’s hoping that the solution presents it’s self quickly and that it doesn’t cost an arm & leg or require me to move sooner than I really want to. 

Still open to any ideas or suggestions that any of you might have.  I have yet to find any dead bodies, evidence of any kind of infestation by rodents or mold.  If I open the windows and get air circulating the odor can be knocked down within an hour or two, depending on how much the wind is blowing.  Close the windows and within 30 minutes the odor is back.  It’s baffling.  My next idea is to run my ozone machine in the attic.  It’s vented (there are 3 dormers) so I don’t think it will cause any problems. 

For now onward to rest and cuddling with the Gator.  She will enjoy it!  I did leave for a bit and grab a pizza.  Never in my life I have ever spent $40 when dining out for pizza but today it happened.  I got a side salad and that helped shoot the price up but I haven’t really had anything to eat all day and felt like total crap so it helped to give me some energy even though I really wasn’t hungry.  Got a nice view of a hot waiter while I was there.  Cheers!

Trouble

I am once again plagued by an unknown odor in my home. This is something that has happened off and on for the last year or so. Weather change seems to trigger it. It’s difficult to describe but I can tell you that it does irritate my nasal passages. Rather that sit by and hope that it passes I have really dug in this time but am not finding anything.

I’ve heard periodic noise of feet on the roof but we have tons of squirrels but I figured it might be something else or maybe my roof was breached and something is in the attic. Having a fear of heights and fallen off a ladder I am not keen on going high up but I made it. Into the attic. I stayed on the ladder and used a flashlight to look around. All I saw was darkness and insulation. I did this in the day time so it would be obvious if the roof was breached as I would see the sky or some form of day light. STRIKE 1

My basement is finished with a drop ceiling and I inspected inside of it with a flashlight and looked at multiple tiles. Nothing obvious sticks out and there isn’t any sign of mold (other than what I treated a couple years ago, which I will cover in a bit). STRIKE 2

Perhaps it’s something in the carpet, I gave up cleaning the carpet other than running the vacuum years ago. I found it odd that a change in the weather would cause this but hey I figured nothing ventured nothing gained. I didn’t do the whole house just parts of the living room and my room. I found an old cat toy that had the smell in it & figured maybe this was it but it wasn’t. On the bright side the carpet turned out really well. I had purchased some super pet carpet shampoo and thought that at the very least the smell of the shampoo would mask the odor. Nope. STRIKE 3

I’ve got an ozone generator and have used that. The odor is gone for a short period but comes right back. Even when I treated mold it would wipe out the smell for a couple days before it came back. STRIKE 4

I’ve looked under furniture and around windows for anything obvious. I’ve checked outside of the house and again nothing sticks out. There is some green mold growing in spots on the siding but that is easily wiped out with a pressure washer (on the list of things to do for the weekend). STRIKE 5

Last night I went to Lowe’s to purchase something called Gonzo Rocks which are volcanic rock that claims to absorb all sorts of odors. You have to give it 4 to 8 hours to work. The bin where it was supposed to be was empty but the website said they had it in stock. The stuff was $10 a bag. It’s in a mesh bag, you just remove the plastic covering the bag and then set it out for it to work its magic. I had to go scour for help and it took 30 minutes for the guy to find the stuff with my help. This sounded like it would do the trick. I got 3 bags. 1 for the living room, 1 for my bedroom and 1 for the basement. I put them out and did my best to try to sleep despite the odor. Gator woke me up in the middle of the night and I knew then it didn’t work. STRIKE 6

A couple years ago I got an audio book it was about life & death in the ER and the lady referenced something called Angry Orange and said that it was the only thing that would mask the smell of a dead body (after it was removed). Sometimes in her particular hospital bodies would sit idle for hours before they were taken to the morgue. Remembering that and also doing some searching I found Angry Orange on Amazon. I’ve got 2 small bottles on the way and they will be here on Monday. Of all of the times I hope Amazon delivers early this is certainly one of them.

The odor only appears to bother me. It affects everything from my mood to desire to eat, sleep and my mood. It’s like my house is killing me. Gator appears to be unaffected thus far but she did get sick yesterday a couple times. While in the short term I’d like to remove, I would like to know what the odor is and where its source is. Finding the source is difficult at best but is the best assurance of a positive outcome and being able to put this behind me. Considering I don’t know what the smell is, much less I can’t identify where it’s coming from I at my wit’s end. Add this to the list of reasons why I’d like to move. There is an ammonia like smell to this odor. It is in my living room/kitchen and bedroom, as well as my office in the basement (which is directly below my bedroom). The master bedroom and spare guest room are unaffected. In fairness both of those rooms have the doors closed because they are used for storage more than anything else. I have opened the windows to the house each morning rain or shine and after a couple hours the odor disappears but as soon as I close the windows the odor is back. I should add that I also changed the HVAC air filter, even though I knew that wasn’t the cause, I figured it could hurt.

I had something similar over the winter and thought for sure that something died outside. This was an unfamiliar smell and it would make me want to vomit just smelling it. This time around I am nauseated a bit but overall, I can still eat. I kind of wonder if I am just going insane and fighting with something that doesn’t truly exist except in my mind. What occurred in the winter lasted for 3 weeks to a month and then it was just gone. Presuming it is something that is dead and decaying I know that once that process is over with the smell will be behind me but I would just as soon not wait and would much prefer to solve this mystery.

Around 3 years ago in the summer I got seriously ill, it was close to pneumonia and knocked me on my ass like pneumonia (I had this as a child). I was recovering and then out of no where I got drastically worse. I was out of work for a couple weeks but at home. I started to recover and then one day happened to look down at the back door and saw large objects – they were large moldy mushrooms. I got rid of them and didn’t really investigate like I should have, by the time I did investigate I learned that I had black mold in 2 bays of ban board (also referred to as a rim joist), it was into the carpeting and all a result of a water problem. I had a gutter issue and didn’t really think anything bad would happen but boy was I wrong. I called a guy to fix the gutter and confirmed that resolved the water issue. Then called another guy to work with the mold issue. He wanted a small amount of money and was just a demo guy who was going to leave me with a large hole in my dining room floor and would rip out the infected part of the rim joist. I elected to research the subject and I ripped out a small portion of the subfloor and what mold from the rim joist that I could. The rest I treated with Concrobium mold killer which is an encapsulant that seals the wood and crushes/kills the mold. I then painted over it with mold killing paint. The lingering strong odor is what lead me to purchase an ozone machine and it worked really well. The sad part is that I waited a bit too long and this spread to other bays on the rim joist so the small job turned into a medium job. I also purchased air purifiers to help clean the air. I spent far less money but really only treated part of the problem, being the inside of the wood. The outside of the wood is still moldy and while the water has been cut off so the mold can’t grow it’s still present. I just figured out earlier this week that you have to rip off the siding and pull the entire joist and replace it. If you don’t do that part of the job correctly your home will collapse. Fortunately for me the wood was/is still in decent enough shape. There is a persistent musty smell in the basement and the aforementioned unknown odor is way different.

Another unpleasant thing that happened is that we had two male cats (the strays that lived here part time until we had enough and made them full time residents) that loved to spray. One more than the other, he peed on everything in this house that he could. He was young, full of energy and all of momma’s family hated him. Both of these cats have since passed and I have had to clean the house with the help of a black light and gallons of cat urine remover to get rid of the smell. Cat urine has a very strong ammonia smell to it. It is by far one of the worst household odors in existence.

Later today I plan to make a Target run to buy air fresheners to help cover/mask the smell. If you have any ideas on other things, I can/should try or know who one might call to help with a task like this I’d appreciate any feedback. Meanwhile I hope that I am at the very least successful at masking the odor so that I can maintain what little sanity I have left. I know we all have our problems but mine seem to be so bizarre and difficult to solve. I’m good at fixing other people’s issues but not my own. Here’s hoping whatever it is I am inhaling doesn’t negatively impact me or my gator which is a much stronger concern. I am more worried about the cat than myself, if I know that something is harming her and I can’t fix it that will crush me.

I’ll keep you posted but again would appreciate any help or ideas that you might have.

Ye old Sunday

Today just doesn’t feel quite like a Sunday to me. I’m also very board. Last night I downloaded Hinge. It’s the dating app that is meant to be deleted. I’ve also deleted it but I did give it a spin. Like all other dating apps, they want money for extra features. They require 6 photos of you to create a profile. There are built in captions that you can tag your photos with to be witty. There is plenty of room to expound and tell people about you but the questions are generic and you don’t really feel like you’re creating what traditionally is known as a profile. You have to either use location services or scroll on a map for your area. You can specify an age range and if that is a deal breaker. I set mine for 27-50 but I still got guys as young as 18. Interesting to see what was out there but I honestly didn’t give it much of a chance. I found a couple of semi-cute guys that I was interested in but I started thinking about all of the particulars with a relationship and dating in general, it was enough to sour me and that’s when I jumped ship.

I would like a guy to curl up with (snuggle & sex as well eventually) and talk with. I think I am more in the market for a really good friend that could develop into something more. Plus, in my mind were not out of the woods yet with the pandemic. I think about just radically changing everything in my life from location (home), vehicle and work as well. It would for sure shake thing up but I know that is not practical and that should I fall on my ass there would be no one or nothing to catch me. Life in general is comfortable now, I just need way more friends and I’ve known that for a very long time.

Shifting gears, all of my chores with the exception of putting the laundry away is done. Gator surprised me I vacuumed up stairs and was really hot & sweaty so I took a break and got some ice-cold water to help cool down. I eventually was ready for a nap. I pushed myself and opted to finish vacuuming downstairs. I had just finished my office when I turned around and there she was. She doesn’t normally come downstairs. Even now as I type this, she is crying upstairs wanting me to come back to her. I kind of wish she would get a little more comfortable with the basement. For one thing it’s cooler down here in the summer and it’s a nice change of pace for me, plus I’ve got 2 monitors and a much better seating situation.

Anyway, once I was done, I pushed myself to go get something to eat. I wasn’t hungry but know that I have to eat. I decided to try a new Mexican place and man it was horrible. One guy is the waiter, bartender and cashier. He was up to his eyeballs with people to take care of. I had a short wait before he noticed me and sat me. Then I looked over the menu and was paralyzed once again by choice. They must have satellite radio because it was on a Spanish station and every word spoken, sung or a commercial was all in Spanish. It was annoying because they were blasting it. It did help to set the mood but beyond that it was annoying to me. The food just didn’t taste right. I ate it with the hopes that it stays down. I feel fine right now but once I was finished, I had a slight touch of nausea that faded. Hey I’ve wanted to try this place and now I can say that I did. I have no plans to go back. Plenty of other good Mexican restaurants in the area.

The weather today was all sunshine but rain is in the forecast. It changed just as I left to grab dinner. I should have hit up the home improvement store to grab a paint scraper so that I can tackle my next fun project of painting. It’s pretty clear to me that the lawn guy isn’t interested in that job. I should have also worked on the gutters in the back and trim away some ivy. It’s not as if the work is going anywhere, I will get to it eventually. Speaking of the lawn guy, I finally got a bill from him. I wasn’t terribly pleased that he waited so long because the bill was large and even though we talked about weekly service, he chose to put me on a bi-weekly service but it costs $5 more. It’s not the end of the world and I wanted bi-weekly when I went into it. There were one or two cuts that he didn’t charge me for at all when they did weekly service for a short time and I figure it all balances out. I just hope that he sends a bill much sooner next time. I’m used to paying by the month and not for a couple months at a time.

Today was one of those days where I could and probably should have just gone for a long drive, it was in my original plans but I scrapped them. Gas prices around here are back to sky high, $3 plus per gallon. Remember this time last year the prices were so low. Guess that is when we all should have stocked up but every one was shuttered in their home trying to stay away from the virus. What a world it’s been one yell of a year and a half, nothing that I would have thought I’d see in my lifetime.

Surfing the net, I randomly found a nice photo of a guy showing off his rear but fully clothed and I thought I would share with you (see below). I hope you enjoy it. Something about a guy’s rear end just drives me wild. Take care and we will talk again soon.

Happy Weekend!

I hope that all is well in your world and that you had a great week. As for me I am hanging in there. A little bored & depressed. There is a Sudafed shortage in my area and it’s the decongestant that helps make life manageable for me. Since it’s used to make meth, I have to have a prescription to get it in the quantity that I need and at an affordable cost. I’ve been forced for a couple weeks to pay retail price and I am not terribly happy about that because the 2 packages that I have purchased cost ½ of what I would pay for a much larger prescription. After trying to fill the prescription for a week the pharmacy just gave up and put it back in my file. I am not pleased about that but rest assured it will be taken care. The one thing that I hate is the use of the word “controlled substance” if you are getting a pill via a prescription then it’s a controlled substance in my book, doesn’t mean it’s a bad thing. Anyway, I tried to get my prescription transferred to a different pharmacy but since it’s a “controlled substance” they can’t do that. What a bunch of horse shit.

Friday between Gator waking me up in the middle of the night and my head & sinuses I opted to call in and take the day off work. Not what I really wanted to do but at the same time mentally I needed the break. It’s been non stop and high pressure. I put my phone in airplane mode and set it on the dresser. I didn’t take it off of airplane mode until around 7p Friday night. I had already turned off work email so all I got was personal stuff and turns out I didn’t miss anything.

Earlier this week I was shocked to learn of the sudden passing of Alex Riley a porn star who worked for Helix Studios. He was only 22, so this isn’t something you would anticipate happening. He had an amazing smile and that is one of many features in guys that I have come to appreciate.  Lots of people are wondering what happened and I can say I too am in that group. However, I realize that may or may not come out with time. The death of any young person is a hard thing to process for me. I also struggle processing death when it’s some one I know and the closer they are the worse it is.

Thursday afternoon I got some pretty good shots of Gator and added them to her digital photo album. I started to look over the album and just got overwhelmingly sad thinking that some day this album is all I will have left. I also thought about the rest of her family that has departed and that made things worse. I eventually had to stop looking at the photo album and move on to something else. My mood changed with time. This morning (Saturday) as we went back to bed, she was curled up next to me and put a paw out to touch my hand. I placed my hand on what I thought was the top of her paw. When I woke up my hand was on the top of her head and she was in dreamland so peaceful and still that I thought she passed away. That would have been horrible to wake up to but she sprang to life and wasn’t terribly happy about it.

I finally got up the nerve to open the box for the gutter attachment to the leaf blower. I played with it and had to use it a little differently than it was designed. I cleaned out he gutters in the front of the house. They aren’t spotless but have a lot less crap there. It didn’t do a perfect job by any means. The best and only true way to clean a gutter is by hand. All of the other methods that I have tried fall short of just getting your hands dirty. At least the water will flow a bit better. Plus, I stirred up some leaves in the front yard which won’t make the neighbors terribly happy but that’s why God invented wind; it helps move things along.

After I was done, I got a shower and sat in front of the TV watching 20/20 about Scott Peterson. My upper back was shot and I had the shakes from over use of my muscles. Once things calmed down, I got dressed and went out. I wanted something to eat but just didn’t know what. I fought the urge to visit Denny’s because of the cute waiter. However, after some driving around that is exactly where I wound up and much to my surprise he wasn’t working. I didn’t ask about him but may if the next time I stop in and he’s not there. I kind of felt like it was fate just to ask him out and had he been there I would have gone through with it. I would kind of like to scratch it off of my to-do list. I am not optimistic about getting a yes but asking is half of the battle, especially when you don’t know if the guy is gay in the first place.

Back home, caught up on work and personal stuff. Working on laundry. Gator is crying her head off wanting me back up stairs and I am going to give in reluctantly. I would just as soon stay in front of the computer a bit longer.

One of the things that I have enjoyed watching this week is Chiropractic videos. I like watching the guys take off their shirts and get worked on. It’s a turn on and also a nice way to relax. I just love the cracking sounds and I try to imagine how good that must feel. I could benefit from having my neck & upper back worked on but Chiropractors want to work on everything and my lower back is the no zone, I don’t let anyone ever touch that because I have some serious damage there. The few times when getting a massage that I didn’t speak up I regretted it the next day and for days after. I get the idea that you want to work on everything because it’s all connected but I have limits on what I will permit. An interesting adjustment is the Y strap or another Chiropractor has patented the term Ring Dinger, while his adjustment is done differently, they both appear to me to accomplish the same thing. Look it up on You Tube if you’re not familiar with it. I can’t say that I would ever like to experience that but it’s neat to watch peoples face after they get adjusted with either method. It wakes them up and opens their eyes for sure to say the least.

COVID restrictions are easing and it’s like people are starting to put the pandemic behind them. There are still plenty of people trying to get shots but even mass vaccination clinics in my area are either reducing their hours or closing up. Local pharmacies are full of people getting shots. I am glad that I am done with it but I think that we may move too fast to ease restrictions only to wind back up in this mess again. It’s not any fun and I don’t enjoy wearing a mask or staying home but I’ve gotten used to it. I feel like we need to hang on a little longer before were in the clear, just my opinion.

Well off to see the furry girl and spend the evening catering to her every need. Tomorrow will be breakfast out and the grocery store. Not sure if I will do anything else. It’s supposed to be a rainy day and rain for all of next week as well. Temperatures are unseasonably cool it’s like we actually get to have Spring this year, which most years that season lasts for a week and then were in to the dog days of summer and it’s super-hot.

Take care and we will talk again soon!

Getting to know you–What Kind of Guys do you like?

 

 

Yesterday the thought hit me, why not blog about the types of guys that you like. I enjoy writing about a topic rather than just sharing the boring details of my daily life. If you happen to think of a topic or there is something you’d like to know my opinion on, leave it in the comments I can use all the help I can get. The one graphic that I wanted for this was a list of terms that mean male, such as Guys, Dudes, Boy, Man, Men etc. in one of those pictorial charts, hopefully you know what I am talking about. Needless to say, I haven’t been able to find it on-line but now that I have put it out there, I am sure one of you will probably find something and point me in that direction, if that happens and it’s what I am talking about I will share it.

As for me my taste in guys is pretty consistent. I like younger guys so Twinks and Jocks. A little muscle is fine but I do believe you can overdo it and that is a huge turn off. I’m an ass man and small is a good thing in my book and a bubble is also a very good thing. While I can describe in words what attracts me and while you could show me the most gorgeous guy in the world and I probably would want to have sex with him, what truly is attractive is what kind of mind & personality that he has. The outside is what attracts you but the real beauty is on the inside. Guys tell me that I am good looking or cute and that my looks don’t match my age. That’s all well and good but I just don’t see it. I never have really liked the way I look, but when I check out old driver’s license photos man in my younger days, I was very much a looker, I see that now but couldn’t see it then. If I knew then what I know now, I probably would have had more sex and my life would be different (not necessarily better). Chances are in more years down the road I will look back and think about how I look today compared to my future self and think that I looked good. Beauty fades and sure you can have plastic surgery done but really only so much of that and then you become distorted. Youth is where it’s at you have your sexual peak, great amount of energy and stamina that you don’t have when you get older. As I write these words, I realize that I sound like an old geezer as if I am 80 but I’m far from that age, just about to turn 50.

I struggle with age because it marks time that you have been on earth and helps you to forecast the time you have left in most probability barring any health complications, getting hit by a bus, bullet or train. I also feel my body aging. However, I am the same little kid trapped in this old man’s body. I suppose lots of people feel the same way, hell maybe everyone feels like this.

I’ve digressed a bit but back on topic. Not sure how much into porn you are, given that I am single (widower) porn is my sex life. If you are familiar with porn then names like Aiden Ward, Ashton Webber, Blake Mitchell, Blu Kennedy, Brent Corrigan, Brent Everett, Devin Moss, Donny Forza, Drew Peters, Hunter Page, Joey Hard, Joey Mills, Johnny Rapid, Joseph Rough, JP Dubois, Kaleb Stryker, Kirk Cummings, Logan Cross, Noah Brooks, Ryan Jordan, Ryan Raz, Sam Bridle, Sam Truitt, Scott Finn, Seamus O’Reilly, Travis Stevens, Trent Ferris, Wes Russell, and Zach Covington to name a few will give you a bigger picture into the types of guys I like. Photos of them appear below.  I know I have probably forgotten a few names that I think should be in the list but the list should give you a general idea. If you know porn studios by name then Corbin Fisher (huge fan of Chandler, Jacob, Josh & Travis – guys were the best but new guys like Dane aren’t bad either), Falcon, Hot House, Helix (yes, I know there is huge drama around this place and I am not a fan of the owner but I have enjoyed past content), Raw Fuck Club and Treasure Island Media have content that is of interest to me. My first porn studio love was Falcon, they have been around for what seems like forever and back in the 80’s/90’s there was something special about the quality of movies they produced. You can say the same thing for the early Bel Ami movies as well.

One thing that some people lose sight of is that what you see on screen is a fantasy. Porn stars are people too, most are in it for the money the enjoyment of orgasm is just a plus. The character you see on screen is just that a character and the person behind the stage name has a totally separate life. It’s fine to talk to them if you see them in person but don’t get grabby and most really don’t like to be hit on. Don’t have such high hopes because chances are you will get disappointed quickly. I’ve read enough social media posts to know that. It’s about having common respect that you should give to everyone.

Earlier I mentioned that I’m an ass man so of course anal sex or anything with the butt is fair game. Not exactly sure why I am so overwhelmingly attracted to the ass. I enjoy watching everything from mild to wild. Not into bodily fluids or feet, most everything else is fair game.

I like two things in this world Men and Food. If I can’t have one then I am damn sure going to have the other. Bring on the cake! What I enjoy viewing on screen is different from what I enjoy in reality. I would describe myself as vanilla but one may not view me as total vanilla. I know what feels good and appeals to me, as well as what doesn’t. Hopefully, when the time is right, I find a guy that I am compatible with.

I am all about a smooth body or as close as you can get to it. Tattoos aren’t really my thing but if you have a couple, it’s not a show stopper, just like cologne smells differently depending on who’s wearing it, tattoo’s look really good on some folks and others not so much. I do prefer a smooth guy. Piercings are okay (there is such a thing as too many in my book). Size does matter with me and bigger can be better but you can only take so much (regardless of what cavity you are placing it in).

Hopefully, this gives you some better insight as to my preference. Maybe we have something in common, maybe not. It’s totally okay, I get that were all different and what turns one person on can easily turn another person off.

I would be remiss if I didn’t touch on this. Studios are required to validate that the performers are of legal age. Most also require testing for STI & STD’s. Some of the behavior on screen might give an alternate appearance and I am sure that there is probably a studio out there that only cares about age and not if a guy is infected with something.

Some people also confuse being gay with being a pedophile. They are two very different things. Your sexual orientation can be bi, gay or straight and you can also be a pedophile. Kids are just that kids and eventually they will grow up and learn all about sex, meanwhile let them be kids and have their innocence and enjoy life. While I wasn’t sexually abused, I do know what it’s like to be robbed of your childhood. Pedophiles have a mental disorder and need treatment, not to mention they shouldn’t be around children. Being gay is not a mental disorder but it was considered such at one point in time. It’s like Spaghetti & Donuts they are two different types of food.

Sex is like pizza, once you have it, you always want more. Everyone (for the most part) likes sex. It’s not a drug but it certainly can be an addiction. I’ve been told that most gay men want a Twink (which is gay speak for younger guy in his 20’s) so that is not uncommon. The thing is they may look good on the outside but mentally they are not the same as a full-grown adult (anyone over 30). If I could find a Twink and we could get along, that would be great. I’m not going to fool myself and think that it’s possible. It did happen for me and my late spouse, I just happened to be the younger guy. One of the few times in my life where I can say, boy was I lucky!

I hope you enjoyed this post and the eye candy that came with it. All of the images came from Google if you want to see them in their full glory just give it a Google! Thanks for stopping by, talk with you all again soon. Best wishes for the week ahead.

Panic–Stress–Chaos … just another day at the office

Greetings!

I hope that you are all doing well and that life is treating you fairly. At the time I am writing this it’s Thursday a little after 5p. Wow, it’s been some kind of a week. Lots of stress & pressure but thus far I have made it through. My mid back is killing me and I have the overwhelming desire to try to pop my back. I’ve never been any good at making my bones pop but I somehow think that will make things better. Usually the more I try, I eventually will make things worse so it’s better off that I not try. It’s beyond time for a new bed and I am sure that would help. Gator has woken me up every night this week wanting food and one night it was food & warmth because it is getting really cold at night time.

My appetite hasn’t improved I am still eating breakfast and supper. I got on the scale and I don’t see any drastic shift in the numbers, either in loss or gain. It’s about average since the pandemic really took a good hold. I am also thinking of going to grab pizza over the weekend. Eating breakfast out is also very appealing to me. As you can see, I still have food cravings. I am really eager for time away from work but I am on-call. I don’t expect anything major will happen over the weekend but then again one never truly knows that for certain. I usually don’t stray far when I am on-call for that very reason but I don’t allow myself to be chained to my house, unless it’s something I want.

I’d like to clean out the gutters or at least try but rain is in the forecast for the weekend. I also still haven’t opened the attachment for the leaf blower that I bought. Kind of unlike me to at least not crack the box open. I’ve literally brought it in from the front porch and it’s sitting next to the front door. I am eager to jump in to home improvement but what I envision and reality are two different things. I wish I could put my old lady for a cat to work, having a helper does make the job easier and a bit more fun (if there is such a thing as fun for home improvement).

Friday has come and gone. Another crazy day filled with stress and some mild anxiety. However, I made it out. Things were all calm and I essentially shutdown in the afternoon. Then towards quitting time things picked up again. I’ve got someone leaving over the weekend and I have to stay up on Sunday night so that when the clock turns over at midnight to Monday morning, I have to shut this person down. I’ve had some people leave late but never that late. Lots of firsts this week at work. I still can’t get rid of the thought to quit. I would say that I am suffering burnout and could use some rest – like no work for say 3 weeks. However, that would be hell to play catch up from. You want to reward yourself by taking a vacation but then playing catch up is your punishment. It’s a double edge sword and a merry go round that just doesn’t seem to stop.

I saw on social media that the movie Takers with Paul Walker is streaming on Netflix. I thought I had seen all of his movies but nope that was a new one. There’s a booty shot as well. After that movie was done, I re-watched Running Scared and that has a booty shot plus he’s grinding on some girl. Damn I wish that girl was me! He was a good-looking well-rounded actor who had a bright future and was taken from us much too soon. Even if he was straight, I still very much appreciate his body!

Mid-way through the first movie my heart started beating funny, like it was going to jump out of my chest. They call it palpitations; I call it misery. I had the thought a couple days ago that I was going to die. It just hit me out of the blue, now a couple days later this. I did some research on-line. What I read said that unless you have pain it’s not really a cause for concern. However, I am very much concerned because this isn’t normal and I don’t want to live the rest of my life like this. My fear is that my body is reacting to years of taking Sudafed. It’s the only drug that keeps me decongested since I suffer from year-round allergies. I am on a handful of medicines for just allergies and have been for a good portion of my life. I am paying close attention to this and if it becomes too bothersome I will either go the ER or call my doctor. If there is any kind of pain that comes from it, I will just call 9-1-1 and not play around. While I do indeed have a death wish, I don’t want that wish to come to pass as long as my little girl (Gator) is still alive. It would crush her; she has watched her family disappear before her eyes and I am the last thing left. Once she is gone then my feelings will likely change and I won’t care. This could all be from stress as well. It’s a crazy time of year at work and I have been flooded, there are tight deadlines and large amounts of work to be done. My boss wants to have meetings, hold hands and constantly review how things are done. I just shove all of that shit aside and get the job done. I know what I am doing and just because one person made a critical mistake, he is punishing everyone with this micro-managing bullshit and I would love nothing more than to tell him where he can stuff it.

Saturday well my well laid plans for the day were a bit of shambles because Gator woke me up in the middle of the night. I haven’t had a good night’s sleep in I can’t tell you how long. I really crave it and maybe it will come to pass soon. I can hope anyway. She had me out of bed by 8a regardless of how I felt. I should have showered but figured that I could do that later (I procrastinate about most everything, it’s my new motto and that’s so unlike me) and instead got dressed. Grabbed my medicine and headed out the door. Off to get the car emissions tested. The notice I got said to avoid Saturday’s because that is their busiest day of the week. Fuck when are working people supposed to go? Of course, your busy on Saturday. I was so early that I was the 2^nd car there and got immediate service. Their computer and the computer in my car refused to talk to each other. They had me shut it off then turn it on in AUX mode. No lights flashed so they passed me by default. Easy enough.

I wanted to hit up Waffle House but figured they would be way too crowded so instead I went back to Denny’s. What a mistake that was. The food was horrible – cold eggs. They were done but cold. I asked for an English Muffin and got toast instead, strangest looking English Muffin I have ever seen flat and sliced in wedges. I saw a few good-looking guys. I had my eye out for the cute waiter that I have seen in the afternoons but it was morning so of course he wouldn’t be there. I really wanted to hit him up today, the desire was strong but I steered clear of it. After breakfast I went home. Watched a little bit of TV and rested while I could. Then got out in the afternoon and picked up cat food, hit up 2 pharmacies and the post office. I had a deadline for work and knew that I wouldn’t meet it but I went for pizza. I got something different instead of the deep dish that I normally get. It wasn’t bad but deep dish is my favorite. The cute waiter there took care of me. I of course know him because I have been there and he caught my eye but he didn’t remember me from Adam and treated me as if he had never seen me before. I thought about asking him out multiple times but chickened out. The guy at Denny’s is much more my type, I haven’t seen his face since he is wearing a mask but his body is what is turning me on!

Home from eating pizza. I got the gator some food and then got in front of my computer to take care of work. That upset her but it’s not like I had a choice. Of course, I am done now and could be upstairs with her but kind of enjoy the break. Were glued to each other and a little break is nice. She tolerates me for short periods of time and in a few minutes, she will be crying her eyes out. I’ll be up there soon enough and then we have to figure out what to watch. I enjoy her staying by myside when I am falling asleep or laying in my lap while I am watching TV and she sleeps knowing that her daddy will protect her.

Tomorrow will be the fun day. Breakfast and then grocery store. Probably home for the day after that and rain is in the forecast. I have plenty here to keep me busy, just need some motivation to get things done.

There you have it the happenings such as they are in my world. It’s not excitement city but I do have some fun now and then. Hope that things are well in your world and that life is treating you fairly. Take care of yourselves and we will talk again soon.

Fixed it

As you can probably tell I managed to fix my scanner issue.  Turns out it was my new router that I got.  I had to turn off a feature called Filter Multicast.  As soon as I turned this off the printer saw my computer and permitted me to scan to it.  Multicast helps avoid wireless collisions when you have multiple streams open.  That won’t be the case on my network, because I am one person and can only stream one thing at a time. 

The benefit of higher multicast rate is to lower the amount of wireless collisions that your wifi data may have. The biggest effect is seen only when you run multiple media streaming devices or services at the same time. First off, the best setting for multicast rate for your router is usually the lowest amount.

Gator isn’t terribly happy with me right now because I left her.  We were all comfy cozy on the couch and I got bored and thought about this.  The router clicked that is the only thing that has really changed.  While I am glad that I solved it, I am frustrated at all of the time I wasted on this.  But at least it’s behind me now. 

On to something a bit more serious for a moment.  I am wondering if there isn’t something seriously wrong with me.  I don’t have a strong appetite, I can pack away breakfast but really don’t want to eat lunch.  I force myself to eat supper.  My blood sugar doesn’t bottom out if I skip a meal, which it should.  The idea of eating lunch is kind of stomach turning.  I nibble on some licorice or some gummy bears.  I think I am losing weight as I can cross my legs without much effort and before it was next to impossible.  I want to lose weight so that is kind of an incentive to follow my body as a guide.  I don’t get hungry but once and a while.  If I ate when I was hungry it might be a couple days.  When I was in my 30’s hunger pains as I knew them stopped but on rare occasions.  Maybe it’s just all situational awareness depression (SAD) but I also think that maybe something is wrong with me.  I remarked to the doc the last time I was in that I recently started loosing my desire to eat lunch and he didn’t seem overly concerned about it.  I’ve been eating sugar cereal for breakfast, which I know is bad for me and I don’t just have one bowl.  I’ve made the choice to go back to Oatmeal in the hopes that it will for sure help my blood sugar but it may also cause my body to crave lunch because I will be less full.  Only time will tell. 

I don’t remember what I was watching, probably an episode of Shameless but I heard that when choosing a safe word the word harder is probably not a good choice.  I thought of a bunch of other no so good safe words as well.  I am sure that your mind is probably start to form some of them as well.  I just thought it was really funny. 

Now that the vehicle is fixed and the shot bs is over with, I still need to scrape & paint the trim around the garage and clean out the gutters.  I’ve also got to get the car inspected but I plan on knocking that one out next weekend.  There the small matter of renewing my drivers license but I have a few months before that creeps upon me and plan to knock it out over the summer, I know I will get a reminder in the mail so it’s probably impossible to forget but don’t put it past me because I could forget my head if it wasn’t attached.  Kind of depends what is on my mind, if I am super stressed then I get tunnel vision and forget about everything else. 

For the painting job I need to either find the paint scraper we have here or go buy one and it’s probably easier to buy one than look around here.  For the gutter cleaning job I bought an attachment for the leaf blower but have yet to take it out of the box.  If this works like I think it should I can stay off the damn ladder and that is a huge win for me.  If it doesn’t work then I threw my money away and will have to climb.  I did reach out to a local vendor for their help for this task but they never called me back and I’m not going to beg.  I would also like to clean off my deck and power wash the drive way.  Those are lofty goals and I don’t want to bite off more than I can chew.  I suppose if I get bored enough I may do anything to occupy my mind.  I am just not a fan of manual labor and not a fan of the outdoors. 

Guess I should get back to the crying baby, plus I also need to get a shower.  That really upsets her when I jump in the shower.  I am not sure if she thinks I will wash down the drain or if she just can’t stand to be away from me.  She is always happy to see me when I get out but the only way I can escape her wrath is if she is passed out cold and that doesn’t happen until the middle of the day.  She does a lot of sleeping during the day, but like me she has her routines. 

Have a great week.  I hope that things aren’t too rocky for me but I know it’s going to be a busy week with fleeting moments of stress.  On the bright side I am pretty much back to feeling normal after my second shot.  I will still hate Monday morning but it’s the nature of the beast.  Take care and we will talk again soon.

Second Shot

Friday, I had my second COVID shot. I went to a different pharmacy and afterward went out to dinner. My arm was slightly sore but otherwise I felt fine. I came home and planned to spend Saturday lounging and relaxing. I was just drained of all energy and slept a good portion of the day. I had some fantastic hallucinogenic dreams and didn’t take any narcotics. Gator was all curled up with me and we had a very nice time. I never left the house yesterday. By the evening I was feeling better but not 100%. I woke up this morning and didn’t really want to get going but knew that if I didn’t nothing would get done.

I started with breakfast out, saw a cute guy and was tempted to take photos but opted not to. I haven’t been on social media for over a day and I am getting tons of notifications like the apps want to lure me back in as if I have gone astray. Anyway, I grabbed the mail and then headed off to the grocery store. For the last couple of weeks there have been no bagger boys working, makes me wonder where they all went to. My last stop for the day was at the pharmacy and then I came home. After putting the grocery’s away, I sat and continued my saga with watching old Shameless episodes. I have a couple of seasons left but were getting close to being done. When I caught myself dosing off, I turned off the TV and opted to take a nap but then I was wide awake, so I got up and came downstairs.

I’ve had this computer issue that is driving me nuts. I never, ever let a machine win but I think the machine has me over a barrel this time. My all-in-one printer won’t see my computer but my computer sees my all-in-one printer. The problem is that when I want to scan something I can’t go to the printer and tell it to scan to the computer, I have to load the document(s) and then come back to the computer and tell the computer to go look for the scanner and then the magic starts. Ever since I got this computer it has seen the all-in-one but suddenly it’s no more. I have removed the printer/scanner software multiple times and rebooted and reinstalled but no luck. I’ve turned off my security software and still no luck. I don’t really see much help available online and this is honestly driving me mad. For now, I am letting it be and walking away but the wheels in my head are spinning and I am trying to think of a way to fix this.

I have been observing Grindr and some of the guys on there it’s interesting but I am about ready to delete the app. I keep thinking about the waiter that I spotted a few weeks ago and yesterday would have been burger day but I just wasn’t up to it. I also think that I should probably leave that situation alone but I guess it’s desperation trying to get the best of me. I am super lonely and it’s got nothing to do with sex, but hey I could always use company in the bedroom. Kind of wish I had a fast forward button that would take me to the next big good moment in my life, even if it’s only a self-induced orgasm.

Next week is my turn to be on-call at work. Last week the boss took over for our co-worker who is out. When the boss is on-call it’s like were all on-call because while he monitors a bit closer, he doesn’t do anything unless he has free time and then he turns into a micro-manager. My co-worker who is out promised that he would call me to check in by the end of the week but I know bullshit when I hear it and knew that he would forget all about me and work for that matter. I mean hell he is on leave and they call it that for a reason, your supposed to leave work. I’m sure he is doing okay and I would like to talk if only to find out how he is doing. Speaking of work, I have to get to my report and then it will be time to go back to be with the Gator and deal with her outburst. She is already crying for food, so I need to kick it in to high gear before she really gets upset.

That’s all I got at the moment. Hope that you’re doing well and that life is treating you better than it’s treating me. Take care and we will talk again soon.