Marv saves the day

Friday night I got a call from the owner of the mortgage broker that I used, I was rather impressed that he reached out.  He had just gotten my letter and wanted to chat.  Once he learned that the issue was resolved he was quick to go but I wouldn’t let him hang up, I took what he wanted to be a 5 minute conversation and turned it into a 30 minute conversation.  He just had one of those voices that was interesting to listen to.  Then I went to bed early on Friday night.  I swore off technology and just watched TV and generally kicked back.  It was nice and I’d like to do it again soon.  I found an old series via Netflix about people smuggling in drugs to JFK Airport in NY.  It is kind of interesting and the criminals think they do a good job of disguising their drugs, (which are mostly found in false liners in suitcases) and they are doing a horrible job.  The best one I saw so far was Heroin in the bottom of a pair of sneakers.  It was crafty but when you pick up a shoe that shouldn’t weigh much and it’s like lifting a brick that sends off bells, not to mention they x-ray shoes as well as luggage so your chances of pulling one over on the good guys is kind of slim, but I am sure there are a few people that have made it.

So on to Saturday morning.  I had so much planned but all I wanted to do is sleep.  Thankfully Marvin was with me in bed.  He kept up his usual racket when I went to adjust the alarm clock the first time.  The second time and then it hit me – you need to get up, your going to be late.  Marvin’s chatter finally worked to my advantage.  I am so glad I haven’t hit him with a pillow yet.  He’s a good boy.  I got everyone fed, decided to skip going to the bank it can wait until next weekend.  Then I made it to the post office to pick up the pee pads.  Then on to therapy where I made it with time to spare. 

I explained my light bulb moment where what is eating at me right now is the fact that I am alone.  I went on to talk about how I have a performance fear in the bedroom because of the amount of porn I watch.  I also talked about my desire, which might shock you to try out Erotic Asphyxiation, which is getting choked shortly before you orgasm.  It’s supposed to be wild and a lot of fun.  However, if you do it alone you could easily die.  My luck everyone would think that I committed suicide and that it wasn’t an accident.  I was encouraged not to try it because just like ecstasy the first time you try it, you could die.  My therapist told me that she knows of a therapist that deals with porn addiction and asked me if I wanted to meet with her.  Nah, what’s the point now.  I mean if you take away my porn now, there goes my sex life.  If I meet someone and we make it into the bedroom and I have a problem, then I would consider seeing that therapist. 

I treated myself to TGI Fridays instead of traveling to the buffet.  Then I came home and laid down to take a nap.  I fired up Grindr just because I feel obsessed to check it.  I got a message from a local guy, no details in his profile but he did have a face picture.  I responded and soon we struck up a conversation and an hour and a half had gone by.  He’s older than me by 3 years, he came to the US about 7 years ago.  With English being his 2nd language he does pretty well.  We hit lulls in the conversation and I kept it going until I started to grow tired and I just signed off.  I woke up and signed back on in an hour or so and he was still there.  We picked up the conversation for a little bit.  He is looking for the same thing as me and lives about a 1/2 hour away.  I will say that based on his photo I am not attracted to him physically but he does sound interesting.  Thus far we haven’t made any plans to meet up.  I’ve been back on today and heard nothing from him.  I don’t want to be the aggressor so I am giving him time to make another move.  He has been single for about 6 years, which is a long time.  I can’t invasion myself single for that long but I suppose it could happen.  It was a pleasant experience to chat with someone who had similar interests, plus he can cook.  He hates cats and has a dog.  It should be interesting to see how this pans out.

I made it back out for cat food and treated myself to a meal while out, I shouldn’t have but I did.  Then it was back home to put away the cat food and play with the computer.  I found a Life Hacker article on Facebook this week about other consumer reports that are available but that most people don’t think to get copies of.  It applies to people in the US so I sat down and went through it and visited a number of websites.  Completed some forms and got them mailed off today.  I am interested to see what I get back in the mail.  I mean I shouldn’t learn anything new about myself that I don’t already know, but given my unfortunate experience last year when my identity was stolen who knows what is lurking.  I can tell you that my credit reports are clean.  I just got my annual copies earlier this week and all looks good.  I will be happy when Bankruptcy drops off but that won’t be for a while.  Given that it’s only 3-4 years old most people don’t really care because I have reestablished my credit and shown that I am credit worthy.  See I didn’t file to extinguish debt, I filed because my back was against the wall and I was out of money with no job.  I didn’t have a choice.  However, it was one of the best things that I could have done I feel a greater sense of freedom or I did until I took on a mortgage.

Sunday has been the usual.  I got a reminder when I went to the store that I will have to shop on Saturday next week or I will be going hungry.  They are closed next Sunday for Easter.  Wow, is it really that time again.  Yeah it is.  Heard from my friend that watches the cats and was there for me after my partner passed.  It was a text message again he wanted to know how I was doing.  I started typing living the dream but felt that he wouldn’t see the humor so  I erased it.  I asked him to give me a call sometime, I wouldn’t mind talking and that I am super lonely right now.  He talked about getting together maybe for lunch soon.  Who knows if or when that will happen.  I got in a 2 hour nap, which is longer than I planned on sleeping but my back has been bothering me since Friday.  I know I screwed it up again at work but life goes on.  Massage this Thursday and I can’t wait, I am still toying around with how long I want, might do another hour.  I am proud of Bear he used the litter box to pee today.  I guess he wanted to try it out again.  I gave him praise and got him cleaned up.  We all ate dinner then he shit on the rug.  Yeah I’m not kidding and it was a huge mess because I let him skip his medication for a day.  I know he hates taking pills.  I told him you were so close to the pee pad, you should have went there.  Thankfully the baby wipes came in handy and I got him and the rug all cleaned up and now it’s like it never happened.  LB has been extra clingy today.  He saw me finishing off the coleslaw from KFC and thought it was ice cream.  His eyes got big and he just looked at me and wanted some.  I told him it wasn’t ice cream and besides I eat that with a spoon and I hade a fork in my hand.  I’m telling you if I would let them try my food no matter what it was they would eat it too.  It’s bad enough that I drop $30 a week on cat food.

I am looking forward to watching Shameless tonight as well as Secrets & Lies.  Then getting into my freshly laundered bed and hopefully falling off into a deep sleep.  I don’t look forward to Monday but it’s coming and there isn’t much I can do about it.  Things that I look forward to in this week are the massage, hopefully seeing the government update the bankruptcy site so I can write my late partners attorney and getting to the bank to finally lock up the mortgage documents – just knowing they are safe will help me sleep better.  Warmer temps would be nice as well.  It’s been back to winter here since Friday.  The office is HOT but if I wear long sleeves I am miserable and sweat.  I’d rather just be comfy but that so far has only happened in the winter.  I don’t think they fired up the AC at work just yet. 

Well off to prep for Shameless.  I’ve got a chocolate cake in the fridge with my name on it.  Time to go dive in and elevate my sugar levels so that the coma kicks in about bed time.  I had 2 orders of Blueberry Pancakes today at Steak N Shake they were so damn good!  I hope your week goes well and that the weather is warm.  I’m always telling you about myself, tell me how are you doing?  Yeah I really want to know.  Take care and I will talk with you peeps later.