Were all still adjusting to life without Momma. I think the children are doing a much better job than me. However, I know that life doesn’t stop just because she is gone. Tomorrow will be difficult because it will mark the 1 week point. Last Monday was dramatically different from how this Monday will play out.
I’m treating myself. Yesterday I drove for pizza and it was really good. The place started filling up with local High School Wrestlers. Wow some of those kids look really hot. Yeah I know they are under age and it’s fine to look, just don’t say anything or touch and your fine. I can do that.
So as you can see my sexual awareness has returned. It took a slight hiatus but I am back to being all revved up. These days porn stars are creating their own content and charging for it, this way the profits all go to them and they cut out the studio. Kind of makes sense if you think about it. Anyway I joined a favorite porn stars Just For Fans site yesterday. I was so not disappointed.
Took myself to Target the trip that I have been putting off for weeks. I dropped close to $100. The one thing I got for myself was some sleeping pills. I thought that something different combined with my prescription pill would help things along. Well it did but I paid a price for it. I was still up a little bit during the night. I didn’t want to get out of bed but I did, fed the kids and then back to bed. I didn’t want to do anything else all day long but forced myself to get up at 8a and get moving.
By the time I got home I was exhausted and that just from grabbing breakfast, getting groceries and gassing up the car. I unloaded the groceries and climbed back in bed. I slept for hours and it was good. I felt like I could be productive but that was short lived.
I sat on the couch with Marvin and watched him sleep. Boy he sure did look comfortable. The sun was out today and it’s really nice out. I wish that it was that way last week, so Momma could have soaked up a little bit more sun. Anyway, got my medicine set out and that is pretty much my day.
I am working on putting away laundry and getting the trash out. I don’t feel like doing much else and honestly I am not pushing myself. I’ve been going non-stop for weeks and there is a reason why I am tired. It has a little bit to do with the sleeping pill I took last night but honestly it has more to do with my body, spirit and soul just being exhausted.
Tomorrow hopefully will be a better day with more energy and I will actually be able to go to work for 5 full days. I haven’t done that in a while. All of the bills are paid. Gearing up for Auto Insurance time, that is always fun. That bill arrived yesterday. I have enough money to pay it in full but am opting to hang on to my cash and pay monthly. Hopefully I will be successful in holding on and continuing to retain some savings, that is a priority for me this year along with meeting a man.
Here’s to what I hope is a cool, calm and collective week ahead. Talk with you all again soon.
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