Tired

Made it home at a decent hour yesterday afternoon.  I had a barrage of emails waiting for me and I caught up on those.  Fed the Gator, took my meds and then heated up some dinner.  Watched Jeopardy and the champ is still going, 13 days of nothing but wins.  Pretty impressive plus all of the cash he’s won.  Uncle Sam is going to love him. 

My evening was interrupted by work.  We had an issue arise and that took up a few hours of my time, even though I wasn’t on call I was helping a colleague.  Gator was upset and I was even more upset when I looked at the clock and it went from 6:45p to a little after 8p.  I had no idea I was just engrossed.  Gator wound up going to bed in my room because she was pouting. 

I made up with Gator by giving her some food and then she got to snuggle with me in my chair as we waited for my sleeping pills to kick in.  She woke me up twice last night and I am just beyond tired this morning.  I’ve been busy with work most of the morning and I suspect if it wasn’t for that I probably would have dropped to the floor. 

I also noticed that I did have an allergic reaction/rash on my neck.  It was hot and itchy.  I just tolerated it and this morning everything is back to normal.  I wonder if I could be allergic to going into the office?  Say it isn’t so.  I did wear my gold chain in so that might be the contributing factor.  I also noticed that I have a small bump/bite on the back of my head but I need someone who can take a better look.  I will be mentioning this to the doctor.  Maybe it’s stress or maybe I am allergic to something but just don’t know it yet.  Next week I will be chainless to see if that helps. 

I have my review this afternoon.  I got a copy of it this morning and it’s just average middle of the road.  It shows me excelling in several areas but most areas I “occasionally exceed expectations”.  I think that is kind of a slap in the face.  2 years ago I got a perfect review where the was no room for improvement, that was by far an exception because almost no one gets a perfect review.  Now all of a sudden I’ve declined slightly according to what is on paper.  That’s not reality because I pour my heart & soul into my job.  I don’t know why because it feels like I get hurt or taken advantage of.  I think I am overloaded with things that I am responsible for and of course they always want to keep piling on more.  Between the review and the BS shtick that my boss talks and his need to hear himself talk and the endless meetings I have grown quite unhappy.  I can’t exactly express that in words because the only remedy is for me to move on, which isn’t something that I want to do.  So I take it in and vent where and when I can.  Overall I like what I do but I am very unhappy with management in general.  I think they have their collective heads up their ass, but I suppose that is what they get paid for.  I also don’t like the busy work that seems to be created constantly.  If things get to a point where I simple can’t stand them and the pressure is getting to me that bad, then I will for sure move on.  However, being 50 and finding a new job especially one that pays as well as my present job won’t be an easy task, which is also part of why I just smile and keep my mouth shut while biting my tongue. 

If it wasn’t for my woes at work and the fact that I had less than the desired amount of sleep last night I would say everything is fine.  I need to get Gator some fluids I think that will help her and having to skip & play with her probiotic to ration it out hasn’t done her any favors.  Now that I see it’s working I will always have a supply of it for her thanks to Amazon.  Speaking of which the next shipment is due today. 

It was raining this morning and I peeked outside to see my hard work with the gutters appears to have paid off thus far.  It was a mild rain.  I am looking for something more aggressive as that will be the true test. 

Time to step away, take a break and grab a bite to eat.  Then back to the fun.  Happy June, which is Pride Month!  Take care and I will talk with you again soon.