Another sick one

Ever have a problem and wonder what else could possibly go wrong?  Sure we all do, I think it’s only natural.

Well as if it’s not bad enough having a sick/dying cat, I am now sick as well.  I have Bronchitis.  It started yesterday and progressed enough that I stayed home today.  I wound up in the ER and I opted for close care rather than driving the extra mile like I should have.  Well I got prescribed exactly the same medicine that I am already taking.  It’s as if the doctor didn’t bother to read the list of medications I brought.  I wanted to bounce back fast and was hoping for some steroids and an antibiotic.  However, that isn’t what I walked away with. 

I have a message into my doctor to see about getting what I want but I don’t know that I will get a timely response.  I know my body better than anyone else on this earth, after all I have been trapped in it for 47 years.  If I don’t know it then no one does.

From the paperwork from the emergency room they say that Bronchitis is viral but yet it talks about an infection.  Their paperwork says that antibiotics are counter indicated and won’t help at all.  I disagree because I have had it before and the last time antibiotics worked.  I’m on the verge of this turning into Pneumonia and if that happens I will really be out for the count. 

You might think I am being a bit dramatic but again I know my body and I’ve been down this road before.  It’s not fun or pretty.  Now I could rob medication from poor Marvin (he’s on steroids) but that isn’t fair to him.  He still wouldn’t run out for a while but I feel like that would just make things worse. 

My time off bank is down to 2 days and it looks like I may be out tomorrow.  I am debating if I want to use a virtual doc service but that will cost me money.  Oddly enough the Emergency Room is totally free.  I could also go the extra mile and check in to another ER but that would be more time wasted.  I am most comfortable here at home.  I’m pounding the fluids, mostly water and some soda like crazy.  That is helping, maybe I won’t feel nearly as bad as I do today, tomorrow.  However, when I lay down that is when the coughing fits start and there telling me that I could be coughing for a month before it goes away.  That is just fucking unbelievable.

While I was out today I stopped by the vet and it turns out the vets that I trust (2 of them) were out of the office today.  I was told one of them would be in at all times this week.  Why lie, I mean if you get a day off tell me.  Poor Ruth is playing me she won’t eat when I am looking or watching.  When I am not watching she does eat some.  So things aren’t as dire as I believe they are.  Right now I am giving though to letting her go over the weekend.  I should hopefully hear from the vet by Friday.  The receptionist tried to talk me into making an appointment and I told her the next time we come here I probably won’t be leaving with her.  The cunt (receptionist) was super unhelpful and wouldn’t even so much as check with another doctor.  I pay a shit ton of money to this place and I feel like they are railroading me out of my money.  For now I am keeping my cool and walking away but given that I am sick and also dealing with Ruth it won’t take much for me to blow.

The over all large problem here is I am either at work focusing on trying to get things done by a deadline or I am focused on Ruth.  I don’t take anytime for myself and in running so hard for so long I have made myself sick.  So now I will pay the price for that.  That price is that I won’t be much good to anyone but I am still going to try. 

What I need is for Ruth to eat semi-normal again, for my body to heal and this cough to dry up quickly, the fever to go away and life to just slow down.  I can’t say that is going to happen but it at least feels good to type it out. 

It’s pretty sad when I can’t even remember the day of the week we are on because one day blends into the next.  I know it’s the work week and not the weekend so at least I have that going for me.  To say that I am unhappy with my life right now is an understatement.  I know that Ruth is going to die, it’s just a question of when and I am having a very tough time coming to grips with that.  You’d think that after I have been down this road so many times it would be easier but it gets harder and harder.  Here’s hoping that I can catch a break soon.