Traffic Monday

Yesterday traffic was horrible.  Everyone was complaining.  I spent an hour just to go around the block.  I came back to the office and decided to eat at a restaurant close by that I have always wanted to try.  It is something that has been on my to do list for a while.

I looked around for people to join me but everyone was gone.  So I ventured there by my lonesome.  I was taken to a table, waited a short time and then greeted by a waiter.  I got a pasta dish, soda and a desert.  With the tip I dropped $50.  That’s when I realized I could have had a V8.  Traffic was calm and I was able to leave and get home in about a 1/2 hour. 

The odd thing about this was the waiter had the same nick and given name as my late partner.  I asked him about it and told him that I lost him in April.  He said that is my birthday month.  Thankfully they were on two very different days of the month.  It was very strange and I still think about it from time to time. 

I arrived home at 8pm, very late.  Got the children fed twice.  Got the trash out.  Got my lunch packed.  Took my medicine, brushed my teeth and that was the night.  Woke up and came back to do it all again this morning.  Didn’t want to be here and still don’t want to be here.

Yesterday was a day of problems and today has followed suite.  I got my anti-theft stickers and just waiting for final approval before I ship this stuff out.  3 sites done and 6 more to go.  It’s going to be a long time.  I’ve got more hellish projects waiting for me and I am so not eager to start them.  However, life is about moving forward.

Speaking of which I am still Google eyed over the guy here.  I’ve been looking at him and he looks at me.  Neither one of us say a word.  My guess is he thinks I am a freak.  I want to approach him but am so afraid of offending him and/or getting him to spring into Ninja mode that I just want to let it go.  Nothing ventured nothing gained.  I had myself all set to talk to him today but passed it up.  Maybe if we are alone in an elevator I might say something, otherwise probably not for now. 

No fresh hell in the mail last night.  I got an EOB from Medicare telling me what providers are going to try to bill my guy, but most of them have already sent their bills.  I know there will be one or two more that trickle in, but it’s going to take time.

Speaking of which, I have one more hour before I venture out into traffic again.  Hopefully tonight’s commute is much better.  I can go home and eat Chicken McNuggets.  Not better for me but better for my wallet.

Talk with you peeps later.

Mundane Monday

Nothing really new since my last post.  Other than I am at work.  I’ve got on my new shoes.  They are comfy but I am ready to take them off.  Kind of tight on my feet, but I know that will change with time.

I’ve got the supper debate going, think it will be Chicken Nuggets.  I got a ton of them for like $4 and they were not frozen.  All the more reason to start eating them. 

I’ve got a little work to do but it’s mostly working on machines to get them ready to go.  I will also be starting on an e-mail migration project soon, that will not be fun. 

Sure wish I could take a nap today.  Didn’t sleep well last night but I did sleep.  The nap from earlier in the day is what messed me up. 

Hopefully you are having a good Monday.  I am going to run.  Talk with you peeps later.

Quick it’s Sunday….let’s hide!

Got my pancakes, they didn’t even taste like a Jelly Donut.  Now I am craving Jelly Donuts.  Went to the Grocery Store, the earlier you go, the less people.  Sure was nice.  Would have liked to see some hotties.  Gassed up the car and headed home, where I have been ever since. 

I did some cleaning and of course laundry.  I finally got my Chicken Salad for lunch and I bought Potato Bread so it should be an interesting sandwich to say the least. 

Finished off the pizza from last night and it was just as good but hotter at home.  I have passed out food so much today to the children, they should all be full for a while. 

I got a nap in until some rude person from a prison called my work phone.  I refused the call because I don’t know anyone in prison and if I did, I wouldn’t have given them my work cell phone number. 

So I’ve got a dilemma on my hands and thinking maybe you can help me.  There is this cute guy at work.  I am not sure if he is gay but I would like to communicate with him to see if he is and if so if he would be interested in going on a date.  Not going to bed.  I thought about a letter or a voice mail but I am so nervous.  I’ve never done this before and so you can understand my apprehension.  I’m like a teenage girl wanting a guy to notice me.  If he isn’t gay or isn’t interested that is cool, it will hurt but I can move on.  Let me know your thoughts.

Time is getting away from me, as usual.  I uncovered a huge amount of office supplies my guy purchased from Staples.  I remember he got it all because it was on sale.  I have no idea what I am going to do with that crap.  I’ve got so much crap everywhere and I found some model railroad stuff that I can sell as well. 

eBay the Post Office, UPS and FedEx are all going to love me.  Just as long as I make some cash off of this that is all I am concerned with.  Getting started is part of the battle.  I’d like to list everything at once and go from there. Buyer pays shipping and I will ship it after I get funds and it will probably be on a weekend or evening.  You want to make sure they get it so you have to send via a traceable means.

Speaking of tracing.  I looked for forms for court on-line and found them.  I also found a service that you fill in all of the information and they will take care of filing your suit, get the parties served – a one stop shop.  Plus it’s all reviewed on-line by a human being.  You can even issue a demand letter to take to court to show the judge that they refused to pay.  Rather than setting foot in a court house, I am very tempted to use the service.  They take credit cards and that is my preferred method of payment – because you can pay it off at once or a little at a time. 

I tracked both of my letters and from the looks of things we are on target for Tuesday delivery.  Provided that goes down then on the 5th of July I can file my suit it will be 15 days plus a couple extra.  I didn’t say 15 business days, I said 15 days.  I’m tired and want this over with.  So maybe on the 5th I will file my suit and then go eat pie.  What a fitting way to spend a day.  Hopefully I can just go eat pie because they will pay up, but I don’t expect that. 

I found my local MCC church and listened to a sermon on-line.  Interesting.  It’s a far way to go just for church but I am inclined to check them out, at least once.  We always talked about going and who knows maybe I will feel at home that I will start going there.  Maybe I will hate it and never go back.  The point is to try it.  Now all I have to do is motivate myself.  That is the hardest thing to do.  I just want to do status quo for now and stay on a specific schedule with routines.  Call it depression, call it denial but it’s what I am comfortable with at the moment. 

I looked into VOIP phone service, cheap and feature rich.  However, the alarm is what is stopping me.  Be my luck someone would break in when the cable service was down and the alarm company would never know about it until it was too late.  I just don’t like taking risks.

Speaking of which, I should probably get moving.  The night is still young but after I am done with my chores it will be time for bed.  I did manage to trim shy girls claws.  She screamed and peed but I got the job done and now we are friends again.  6 more weeks and we get to do it again.  I hate it but it is so necessary.  I wish I had her attitude at times it could come in handy!

Rain in store for us for the next few days and that will only make Lawn Boy rich.  That’s all for now.  I am going to scoot.  Talk with you peeps again soon.

Is it Saturday yet?

That is a title of a song sung by Nick Carter.  I love it and sing with him when it plays on my phone.  I’ve loved the song since it came out and I’ve been singing since the first time I heard it. 

So yes, it is Saturday.  I have worked all week honing and crafting my appeal to the homophobic union that refuses to pay me.  I’ve bounced it off of some legal eagles that I know and gotten some advice.  Most of which was take the personal out of it and make it all business.  This is very personal and there is no way in the world I can take my emotions out of it.  They are fucking with me and making me jump through hoops, like I am a circus animal.  I won’t tolerate it and I am done playing games.  I was quite firm in my letter.  A letter in which I wanted my attorney to write but instead he wrote a weak letter saying you owe my client please pay.  I said I demand my payment within 15 days or else I am going to sue your ass.  I was polite but very firm.  I put in citations of law for my state and the state where the union is based.  I also hinted at talking with the media and how the union would be portrayed as homophobic.  I asked them if they wanted their organization to be portrayed like that to the world and to their membership. 

My personal feelings are they will wait me out to see if this little faggot will actually follow through and sue them.  Then they will tell me, oh too bad we already paid your partners son.  Yeah, well you paid the wrong motherfucker.  That’s your problem and not mine.  I demand my money and I will see this through until there is no more fighting to do.  It’s like my partner used to say.  You fuck me, I fuck you – we all go fucking crazy. 

This is a matter of principal and they are trying to show me that they hold the cards and they can be homophobic if they want to and I can’t do anything about it.  Well, that may in fact be true but it’s doesn’t mean I am not going to try.  Besides that I won’t sue them in Federal Court where they will argue DOMA and ERISA.  I will sue them in my county, where the law is clearly on my side and where Plaintiffs have a high ratio of winning. 

If I do have to file suit and get a verdict in my favor.  I suspect that they will appeal and draw this out until they can’t any further.  Maybe not, maybe they will just pay up and shut up.

The letter was worded to encourage them to pay me off and I will keep quiet but if you don’t pay me then I am going to be a loud fucking queen and tell the whole world about how your trying to fuck me.  I may get all sorts of hate from it.  I fully expect retaliation from the union and/or their members, which could cost me my life however I won’t go out without a fight.  They have managed to piss me off and since I am all fired up, there is pretty much no calming me down. 

I was supposed to meet some friends for lunch.  We did meet but didn’t get to go where we wanted, which is a new place.  They were not open so we wound up at Outback.  Not a bad lunch, especially since it turned out to be free for me.  Had I known that I would have ordered differently but oh well.

I managed to spend a wad of money today.  I visited a shoe shop and picked up a pair of SAS shoes and some Birkenstock Orthotics.  Then I went to Sam’s club and finally I went out for Pizza tonight.  That is all well and good but tomorrow will be IHOP for Jelly Donut Pancakes and the Grocery Store.  I may sneak in a trip to pick up some socks but that is about it.  I find that my money clearly is spent far too easily. 

I am behind in my laundry, but think that tomorrow I will be able to catch up.

I saw a movie today called End of Watch with Jake Gyllenhall in it.  He never did anything for me but after watching that movie, I wouldn’t mind having sex with him.  It was a great movie and as I predicted someone died.  I didn’t like that part of it, but the rest was pretty good.  It’s a cop movie.

My thought is that I am always watching Netflix or Amazon video.  I don’t use Hulu that much so I am inclined to cancel it.  That would save me $7.99 per month.  Not a lot of money but it all adds up over time.

I thought about a couple people my guy used to know and wrote letters to them to inform them of his passing.  I am sure these folks will be quite surprised to learn the news. 

I watched a sermon from my local MCC Church and had thoughts of going over there tomorrow morning.  However, it’s a long way to drive just for church.  I thought about visiting my friends church.  I want to but I just don’t have the gumption.  Maybe it’s Satan or maybe I am just lazy.  Could also be a little bit of both.

I changed rate plans on my cell phone, this time going down in cost and minutes instead of going up.  I needed a boost for a month.  I monitor my usage and if I am close to going over I will be happy to bump up and pay the extra money.  However, I don’t foresee that happening again.  I was talking every night for an hour or two to several different people.  Time has gone on, I am slowly getting used to the fact that I am alone and he is really gone.  Friends don’t call, in fact the phone didn’t ring once this week, except for a sales call for someone trying to sell my partner ink for his printer.  He used to buy in large quantity but stopped a couple months ago and this place has been after him ever since.  I squashed that when I told them he was dead. 

I got a hospital bill in the mail, I wrote these people and provided them a copy of the death certificate and told them he passed away in your facility.  Still they insist that he has to pay them.  So instead of opening the letter, I used my trusty rubber stamp that looks like the post office did it and it’s marked Decease, Return To Sender.  It has the pointing finger and is in red ink, so for all they know the post office did it.  I tell you once and after that I just send your shit back.  He isn’t paying it and I will be damned if I am paying it.  Bad enough that I am continuing his Bankruptcy.  Speaking of which I have to research that.

I tried to fix the CD player in his truck.  What I read on-line was remove the fuse for the radio.  That will fix it because it will loose it’s memory.  Yeah, might have worked for someone else but didn’t work for me.  I am still stuck with listening to FM radio when I drive that thing on the weekends.  It sucks.  I need a Bluetooth speaker and I could listen to the music on my iPhone, which is way better than the radio and channel hopping. 

Hope you had a great Saturday.  1 more day and then were back at Monday again.  Ick! Boo Hiss.  However, two weeks until my 4 day weekend.  Thought about going to Vegas for a day to see Ron White (comedian) but not including tickets it would have cost me $1,000.00 so I decided to pass.  He’s funny but I can get the DVD when it comes out. 

My hand is getting better but I just picked the scab off, which wasn’t a smart thing to do.  The kids are bugging me and I am getting tired so I think I am calling it a night.  Talk with you peeps later. 

Friday

So my ‘friend” cancelled last night at 9:30 but I was in bed already so I didn’t know about it until this morning.  She was supposed to be on vacation this week and now she is telling me it’s next week.  This was our 2nd attempt to get together and I reached out to her.  She wanted me to reschedule but I am not going to.  I figure that she doesn’t want to have lunch with me and no matter how many times I try the end result will be the same, so why bother.  I didn’t even respond to her cancellation notice, I am just letting it go.

I found out that 20 people from my old job in IT were let go yesterday.  They also got rid of one of the bitches in HR, which I think is totally awesome.  Sure glad I am not there and having to sweat about my job. 

Last night I got a message from a friend checking on me and he ended it with so who are you doing now?  I called him on it but in a humorous way.  See I would have blamed it on Auto Correct but he totally owned it and said it was a Freudian slip.  I wish I was doing someone but nope, I am all alone in that department.  Were getting together at a new restaurant tomorrow.  That is the 1/2 way point to Sam’s so I will have an excuse to stop in and pick up more stuff.

I am working on my appeal letter.  I ran it by an attorney friend this morning.  I got all sorts of case law to submit with it that further states my claim.  So I have to make revisions and get it ready to go.  I don’t have to mail it this weekend but I really would like to.  Just to say it’s over with and done, check it off the list.  Then next month after I visit the doctor I can grab a bite to eat and head to the courthouse to file suit.  At least that is my plan of attack, maybe I will get lucky and they will just cough up a check.  However, I fully anticipate a response saying sorry but we have already paid his son.  Yeah, then you paid the wrong person and guess what, were going to court.  These fuckers have me t-totally pissed off.

I had thought about it and told the children that I would be home late tonight because I was going for fried chicken.  However, I think I will just go home as normal.  I’ve got mac and cheese in the fridge along with left over bbq pork from last night.  Eat that and save my money for tomorrow.  I can always change my mind but going home, napping and then working until the wee hours of the morning sounds awesome to me.  Not sure why.

Today is the last day for one of my co-workers who is moving on to another job.  I will really miss her but at the same time I am happy that she is moving on.  It was obvious to me that a change was long overdue and she was in over her head but just didn’t know how to speak up.  Plus the way she was treated was horrible.  I know she will be much better off in her new job. 

My boss lost a relative yesterday.  Death has plagued this office for a while.  First it was me with my partner.  Then it was someone else with their mother and now my boss.  Since things come in 3’s I figure we should be good now.  I am so glad that I didn’t wait to submit my vacation requests, that could have been a nightmare. 

Well I am stuck in hardware heaven right now.  I am still working on configuring.  I am waiting for some anti-theft stickers to show up next week, I have to tag the machines and then I can start shipping them out.  That will be helpful and maybe, just maybe in a few weeks I will be done.  This is no small project.  It’s kind of fun at first but looses its luster after a while.  However, that is the way with most deployments.  Thankfully we buy all of our equipment so if it breaks we just replace it.  Other places lease equipment for 3 years and then it all goes back and you get new equipment.  Which is hell for an IT department because your under a time crunch to get the old stuff back and the new stuff deployed.  When it’s all done everyone is typically happy.

Outside of lunch tomorrow and Sam’s club, no other real plans for the weekend.  If it doesn’t rain I will try a fix on my guys vehicle to see if I can fix the cd player.  Just have to find and pull a fuse, then put it back in.  That should do it from what I have read on-line.  Google is such a good friend. 

Have an awesome weekend.  If any of your guys are Father’s, Happy Father’s Day to you.  I will talk with you peeps later.  Take care.

The Call

Well I made the call today to the Mortgage company.  They have to submit a research request to get all of the paperwork I submitted.  I offered to resend it but they told me it would be easier for them to pull what was sent over.  Okay.  So call back next week.  Really?  Okay so that is what I will do.  At least it wasn’t bad news.

One of the places I went that had WIFI prior to my start has been bugging the crap out of me that there WIFI isn’t working.  It sounds like they have a bad port on their router.  I can’t see my boss spending money to fly me up to fix something that would take a couple hours.  So I told them to contact a local guy and have him call me. I would explain what needed to be done.  That is the best I can do, I am only one person.  The bitch that called me was really nasty and of course I had to hold my tounge and just listen to her bitch. 

My day started off bad when I was just about at work, I stopped at a red light, but went a little bit into the cross walk.  There were pedestrians coming but they were no where even close to my car.  They looked at me and asked me if I could read – meaning didn’t I see the red light.  Of course fucktard that’s why I stopped. I should have revved the engine but that probably would have escalated into something bigger than I wanted or needed. 

I had plans for making progress today but looks like those are in the trash can.  I’ve been bothered with other things and well I’m only one person.  I need a helper to keep on top of all of this.  However, I just tell myself one thing and one day at a time.

I did put in and get my days off.  That will be nice.  I have thought more about the union situation with the death benefit.  I am modifying the draft letter of appeal and sending it.  If they don’t respond with payment then I will use one of my days off to explore suing them and what it will totally cost me.  I don’t need an attorney in small claims court.  I also don’t know that I will win, so this could easily be money that I am out.  However, modifying the letter and mailing it is minimal cost.  The law suit is what will be the major expense.  Nothing says I have to follow through but maybe they won’t want to find out.  From what I have researched in order to get payment out of them if there is a dispute you have to sue and they are all too happy to go to court.  So my threat will be just that to them, if I actually follow through then that will be another story.  I am tired of screwing with them and they have angered me beyond belief.  I mean it’s my time of need and they want to pick a fight.  If they hadn’t told me about the benefit I would have never known and life would be going on without me having this grief in my life. 

Last nights mail brought me a refund check for $16 from the phone company.  I got tired of going to the bank so I figured I would use their mobile app to make the deposit.  Yeah, until I found out they charge a fee for depositing via the app.  The only way to avoid the fee is to visit the ATM or a local branch.  So I ditched the app and stopped by the ATM this morning.  Simple, over and done with and didn’t cost me anything but gas and time.  This bank is fee hungry and they will bleed you until you can’t bleed any longer.  Most everything you do there has a fee associated with it.

Storms looked to be rolling in this morning.  However, now the sun is out.  We were around 100 degrees yesterday.  Hot Child In The City!  Good day to watch all of the guys cut grass or just walk around shirtless.  Bad news is I didn’t see any. 

Supper last night was Chicken Pot Pie followed by a popsicle.  I watched a couple episodes of Reba and that was it.  Tonight I am having the BBQ in a tub.  Not sure if I want Mac & Cheese or Broccoli.  Decisions, decisions.  I will be eating out tomorrow night but again don’t know where because there are too many choices. 

I have a lunch date tomorrow with an old coworker.  She is supposed to meet me but I just have this feeling like she isn’t going to show.  That’s why I always bring my lunch, so if plans fall through or someone is a no show I won’t go hungry.  I hope that she does show and that we have a good time. 

Mashed Potatoes & Gravy my lunch time is about up.  I used some of it for work, but I’ve done my share of goofing off today as well, so it all evens out.  Guess I will get ready to go back to the salt mine.  You peeps take care and I will talk with you later.

1 Busy Guy

Yesterday I got the idea that if the present company that insures our home won’t write a policy in the name of the trust, that it is time to reach out to someone that will.  Chances are pretty good that the house will be in the name of the trust for a while.  So I reached out to the company that wrote my Renters Policy.  My Agent there seems to think that he can write a policy that will help me out.  I told him that I wanted to give our present insurer a chance, because our agent is on vacation this week.  I sent along copies of all of the legal docs that he would need.  Now I am playing the waiting game.

I did the math on Bankruptcy payments my guy has made and there is a considerable difference between what he actually paid in and what he is getting credit for.  Apparently the Trustee disburses funds in an odd manner, which doesn’t seem right and/or fair to me.  I got a website to take a look at that will show me some details.  I have to register for access, which I will do tonight.  I am also waiting to hear from the other firm I wrote.  Plus I am told there are Bankruptcy Message Boards on-line that should be able to help me as well.  I really want to walk away from this.  It’s a struggle to make the house payment and this is an added expense that I just don’t feel I should be burdened with.  However, it it turns out the advice I have been given is correct then it’s an insurance policy and I will probably keep on paying the bastards.

So as you probably gathered it’s lunch time here.  I wolfed down my food.  I was thinking about the lunch time conversations that I used to have.  I looked forward to checking in at lunch time to see what was new and to discuss what was the plan for supper.  Now I have no one to talk to at lunch time and I have to figure out what is for supper, which is subject to change until I actually get home.

Last nights meal was Stouffers Meat Loaf  & Mashed Potatoes.  I threw in a side of Broccoli and there you have it.  A meal small enough to be called a snack.  I was so hungry but I just told myself that was it for the night.  The cats on the other hand wolfed down their food and then asked for 2nds.  I of course gave in. 

I want to eat out but getting home late and then having things to do plus the children being mad at me, well I would just as soon go home.  I mean I will wind up there sooner or later.  I have discovered that having good music playing helps make the place feel a little bit more occupied.

Against my better judgment I paid $14.99 to own a Lewis Black standup routine via Amazon.  I can’t stay awake long enough to watch it from start to end.  I got the tail end last night and he was on a roll.  I started playing it over got a couple laughs and then I am waking up to go to bed and turn it off.  When I sit down at night and go to watch TV it’s not long before I can be out of it. 

Very much looking forward to the weekend.  I have preliminary plans to make it to Sam’s Club again, buy a pair of shoes and eat out a couple times.  I am still kicking the idea about pie around.  I thought about going to a place we frequented for Chicken and Pie, which is much closer to home.  They only take cash and I’ve got some of that.  That might be my Friday night dinner, not sure yet.  I know I want to make it to IHOP because they have Jelly Donut Pancakes which sound yummy.  I love bakery and no doubt I will love these pancakes.

The one thing that for sure will happen is I am going to take a nap.  I look forward to laying on the couch.  To have one cat between my legs and another sitting on my chest. As we all just drift off to sleep.  Picturing that right now makes me want to head home and sack out. 

Thus far this is the first week when I haven’t reached out to a friend when I got home.  I have been calling him often.  I’d like to wait it out and see how long it takes him to call me.  However, I am sure that I will have some type of news either good or bad and will be compelled to reach out to tell him.

I don’t know why but I feel compelled to write this.  You can’t be with someone for 20 + years loose them either to death or a breakup and instantly get over it and move on.  I know I am young but this man was my life and all that I had known for well over 1/2 of my life.  Moving past this will take a whole lot of time.  I have my moments but for the most part I am coping with it better than I expected.  You say you can’t live without someone, when the truth is you just don’t want to live without them.  I am doing all sorts of things that I never in a million years thought would be possible to function once he passed away.

I’ve got my paperwork filled out for my two days off.  I will be asking for them later today.  I don’t expect any problems as I haven’t been off since I was out on bereavement back in April.  My anniversary was in May at which time my PTO bank started over.  I lost 8 days but they were so kind to give me time I feel like it’s a wash. 

Yeah the clock is still ticking.  Lunch time is about done and it’s back to machine heaven.  I forgot all about icing my hand last night.  It’s getting better and looks more like a sore now than a bite.  I have a feeling in a couple days all will be back to normal.  What is driving me nuts is what looks like a small pimple on the outside of my wrist.  It itches like mad.  I am not sure if it came from a cat claw or if it’s connected to whatever bit me.  This morning I decided to pop it and it’s calmed down some.  However just mentioning this makes everything itch again.  Funny how your mind thinks of things when it’s idle but when your occupied you concentrate on what is in front of you and forget about so many other little things. 

Two more days left in this work week.  I hope they fly by as fast or faster than my lunch time does.  Well time to hit post and get back to it.  You peeps take care and I will talk with you later.